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It was in moments like these that Levi allowed his mind to drift to the possibility that maybe this could be his. The world was silent around them in these early hours. Realistically, they should both be asleep. Wake-up call was in an hour, after all, and they couldn’t afford to let the recruits know they were slacking—it set a bad precedent. But Erwin was warm and sleepy and smiling at him like Levi was the final piece of a jigsaw puzzle he had been constructing all his life. Smiles like that made Levi think that Erwin wanted—needed—this just as much as he did.
“We should go to bed,” Levi whispered. He had a sheet half-pulled over them both, their clothes discarded at the end of the bed. They had been there for a while now as neither one of the two wanted to end the thrill that nakedness brought, the vulnerability that came with exposing yourself to another.
Erwin would comment on that sometimes. You seem so human like this, he would murmur, and Levi would scoff, as if Levi wasn’t always human, as if Erwin wasn’t made of steel, even now. Levi merely had walls, but Erwin had the frightening ability to share his whole life with someone and still feel a million miles away.
Erwin shook his head. He traced a finger softly down the line of his jaw. Levi closed his eyes. “To be roused in an hour? I’d rather spend my time more… productively.”
Levi snorted. “I think we just spent the last two hours ‘productively’. Even humanity’s strongest soldier needs his rest, Erwin.” Nevertheless, he hummed pleasantly under Erwin’s touch, making no moves to get away.
“Clean your mind, Ackerman. I simply meant admiring you.”
Heat crept up Levi’s neck unbidden. It was strange how things that Erwin said so casually could have this level of impact on the captain.
Erwin’s touch traveled down his neck and over his shoulders, creating loops and spirals that made Levi shiver. Years ago, he never would have considered letting himself get close enough to anyone for them to do that. He hated how much he enjoyed the vulnerability as he knew it would never be able to last. When Erwin’s fingers descended down his arm, his breath hitched slightly in his throat.
“Did you know,” Erwin said, so quietly that only Levi, inches away from him, could have heard. “That you have a faint scattering of freckles over both of your arms.”
His gaze was so intense that Levi found himself transfixed by it. He nodded slowly, his breathing shallow. “It happens in the sun. It must be the warmer weather.”
“Mm.” Erwin grinned. “Then for my sake, I hope the weather stays this way for as long as possible. I don’t want to miss a moment of this phenomenon.”
Levi’s voice was weak when he spoke. “It’s just freckles, Erwin. Nothing you haven’t seen before. Nothing you won’t see again.”
“No,” Erwin murmured, and Levi thought he almost detected a hint of sadness in his voice. “I suppose not.”
They stayed like that for several moments more, Erwin gently tracing the skin on his arm, the birds quietly chirping outside their window. It would have been a much more peaceful moment if Levi hadn’t quickly realized another fact about himself that the years had caused him to forget. He was ticklish. Very ticklish. Ticklish in places no human had any right to be ticklish. In this case, on his arms. And all of Erwin’s tracing was stirring up these forgotten nerves and sending goosebumps racing over Levi’s skin.
He didn’t necessarily mind the tickling on its own. It was kind of nice, actually, his stomach fluttering pleasantly in reaction. It was only that it was becoming increasingly difficult not to react to it. If he could allow himself to squirm a little or let out the giggles building in his throat, he would have enjoyed it a lot more. The idea of doing so in front of Erwin was mortifying, however, so he dampened the joy he might have experienced with the effort of concentrating on keeping entirely and utterly still. It didn’t help that Erwin wasn’t stopping either, and possibly didn’t plan to for the rest of this hour they had left together.
He focused on a spot on the wall opposite them, squinting intently. Look at the wall, admire the wood—oh god, don’t move down—it’s a very nice shade of brown, possibly a chestnut—why are my elbows so sensitive—look at the wall, look at the wall, look at the wall!
His plan might have gone off without a hitch, but unfortunately for him, Erwin was incredibly perceptive when it came to himself. When his touch strayed too close to his armpit, Levi twitched. It was a tiny, miniscule movement, but it was enough for Erwin to take notice of. Experimentally, he traced the spot again and the same twitch occurred. In between them, Levi’s fists had tightened in the sheets. Erwin grinned.
“Levi?”
No response.
“I can’t help but notice that you seem awfully tense.”
“Hm.”
“I was formulating a theory on it, but I wanted to run it by you in case I’ve gotten it wrong.”
Levi squeezed his eyes shut, the wall not enough. He needed total and utter darkness to concentrate. He couldn’t let anything distract him.
“The theory,” Erwin continued, despite the other’s silence. “Is that you’re ticklish. Furthermore, that I am tickling you.”
Levi hadn’t thought it was possible to blush this much until this moment. Erwin was gently teasing against the crook of his arm with just one finger. It was unbearable. It was delightful. Levi was going to break if he didn’t cut it out. He grunted, resolving to burrow his face into the pillow instead.
“Levi?” The smugness in Erwin’s voice could be heard miles away. “Am I correct?”
Levi muttered something that might have been “fuck off,” but it came out in the form of a muffled giggle that wasn’t super distinguishable.
“Was that a yes?”
Levi lifted his face to glare at him. “It was a—” He broke off when he felt Erwin’s other fingers settle in closer to that spot near his armpit—waiting for his next words. He swallowed, looking away. “Yes. A bit.”
Erwin’s brows rose and Levi hated how his heart thudded at the teasy expression. “Ah,” Erwin said, somehow managing to convey an entire paragraph of understanding into that one noise. The essence of it was: gotcha. “I see. I thought that might be the case.”
Levi squeezed his eyes shut and waited. He waited for the inevitable teasing, the frenzied attack, the uncontrollable laughter, the embarrassment he would never live down. But it didn’t come. In fact, Erwin didn’t tease him or even speak at all after that. He just went back to his light tracing, albeit a bit ticklier than it had been before. Levi giggled, unable to help it, and the teasing still didn’t come. Nor did it when he squirmed, or when he let out a noise that was definitely a snort.
Erwin could have taunted him into oblivion if he wanted to. In other circumstances, Levi might have even been fine with that. But no. Instead, he allowed Levi this moment of quiet humanity. The fact sat in the air between them: Levi was ticklish. And Erwin let it sit without being judged or commented on so that Levi could lay there and enjoy the tickling as much as he wanted.
Something clenched painfully in Levi’s chest, a burst of emotion he couldn’t quite identify. He didn’t try; that was for another day. Instead, he buried his face in Erwin’s chest as the other traced horribly ticklish shapes all over his arms.
And Levi melted.