Chapter Text
─ ⋆⋅☆⋅Lando's Phone⋅☆⋅⋆ ─
[F1 Building Chat - Thursday February 20, 13:21]
George: Listen up everybody, we have some new residents moving in today! Keep this in mind as the hallways and elevator might be busy. So far all new residents have agreed to join the residential chat—please try to keep it civil here for at least a week. We don't want a repeat of the last few residents.
Max: what was the record again?
George: Two hours. Which we are not trying to break.
You: WOOOOH NEW BLOOOOODD!!
Max: awh man
Carlos: Lots of new people joining, no?
Daniel: first cars have been spotted!!
is there anything we know about them yet?
George: Some of them are first year students at the University, and there are two transfers.
You: wow mate
u dig 4 informatinu or smth?
George: I've spoken with them? How do you think I got their permission to add them to the chat?
You: dunno
thot you might have
idk
stolen their phine numbers??
Alex: george? stealing??
You: he coud be growing up!! finale!!
Charles: i don't think 'stealing numbers' counts as growing up, Lando
You: 2 me it dos
hold on
u didnt tell me someine was moving in next to me????
Zhou: I moved out last week? What did you think was going to happen?
You: idk???
Charles: probably an empty floor so he can scream while streaming
Alex: As if the entire building won't hear him
You: rude
imn't that loud
ipromsie
Daniel: imn't???
Max: every day you stray further from god
Lewis: Mate why are we assuming that Lando has ever been close to God
You: the fuck in very food friend wwith god
and hello
i cna be very silent whole streaming
Lewis: No you are absolutely not
Neither friends with god nor ever silent
The whole building can hear you scream while streaming
Like last week
You: i dodnt even stream last week??
i was o. abreak??
Lewis: Even worse
Charles: Mon Dieu
We thought you were dying
You: whos we??
Charles: not important
You: bitches
the lot of uou
zhou never had a problem witn me streaming
Zhou: No I did.
That's why I moved out.
You: i thot its cayse ur moving in with balterri :((
Zhou: Added benefit.
Daniel: aw
young people in love
ain't it special
Carlos: Why are you calling valterri young?
Daniel: people in love
happy now?
Carlos: yes :)
Nico: morning everybody :) !
Fernando: It's past noon
Nico: and ?
new people in the building today !
4 th floor is clear and ready
George added +1 (xxx) xxx-xxxx
George added +44 xxxx xxx xxx
George added Osc💕
George added +39 3xx xxxxxxx
George added +33 xx xx xx xx xx
George added +55 9xxxx-xxxx
You: hole on
George: Lando what did I just say?
You left the chat
George added You
You left the chat
[Private Chat between You and George - Thursday February 20, 13:27]
George: Lando, I will only ask this once: please behave in the building chat.
And stop leaving.
You: ong
geirge
a double chat
fr yu??
im: honred™️
George: Lando I'm serious. This is not a good impression to make on the new residents.
You: okay but
have you cisniderd
i have a veyr good rwaosn
George: And your very good reason is…?
[13:35]
George: Lando?
Oh for fucks sake. I'm adding you back into the groupchat—don't you dare leave again.
[F1 Building Chat - Thursday February 20, 13:38]
George added You
~Logan +1 (xxx) xxx-xxxx: Hello everyone! I'm Logan Sargeant, moving onto the second floor together with @Osc💕
Currently in my last year of my studies. Not sure if there is anything else you all need to know?
Max: are you single?
Charles: I'm sorry
Why do you need to know that??
Yuki: wouldnt you like to know weather boy
Daniel: Opinion on barbies
~Logan +1 (xxx) xxx-xxxx: the dolls?
Nico: the food !!
~Logan +1 (xxx) xxx-xxxx: oh!
love em
Daniel: wonderful 😈
Max: simply wanted to know whether this is still the worlds most single building
Osc💕: Hi everyone. I'm Oscar
~Logan +1 (xxx) xxx-xxxx: a man of many words
Daniel: another aussie?? ready for a barbie mate?
[👍]
You: thats all?
George: You wouldn't have missed anything if you hadn't left the groupchat earlier for no reason.
Alex: lmao
well he got you there
You: 🖕🏼
Lewis: Well
It's been a pleasure to 'meet' you all
If any of you run into any problems during the moving process don't hesitate to let any of us know
We will all happily help with anything
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: tysm!!
─ ☆⋅⋆⋅Oscar's Phone⋅⋆⋅☆ ─
[Private Chat between You and Logan - Thursday February 20, 13:53]
Logan: Hey oscar
everything ok?
[👍]
Aight okay
Im going down to get the last boxes
So about the building
Thoughts?
You: and prayers
Logan: Lmao
So u can talk!
[❓]
Nevermind then 😔
Back to the emoji reactions
[❗]
You: leave me and my emojis in peace please
Logan: Only if u explain wtf just happened in the chat&hallway
U just stopped
Out of nowhere
And i know u dont like talking online to people a lot but still
That first message was uncharacteristically short for u
You: wow thats the longest word youve typed this week
want a medal?
Logan: O fuck off
Im serious
Did something happen?
Got bad vibes from the building?
Saw a ghost?
Had ur Raven-Symoné moment?
You: wasnt she called raven baxter in the series
Logan: Irrelevant
You: and i still cannot see the future
Logan: 😯😧😭
You: just thought i saw a familiar contact in the gc
i was wrong
no worries
Logan: Okay then
Keep ur secrets to urself
[👎]
You: just hurry with the boxes logan
ive started unpacking without you
and im certain the snacks are in that last box
Logan: Even the timtams?
You: especially the timtams
Logan: sigh
Ur lucky i love u
You: yeah yeah
just hurry up pls
the door is open already
Logan: On my way!
ffs
Not with that energy but u get the gist im On my way!
[😂]
[F1 Building Chat - Thursday February 20, 14:28]
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: hypothetical situtation
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: purely hypothetical of course
Lando: did you accidentally clog up the toilet in yur new place and you tried to fix it and you dint kneo hoe to and now its wirse and the bathroom is flooded and you need help??
~Lewis +44 7774 4xx xxx: ignore that
~Carlos +34 6xx xxx xxx: better yet ignore lando entirely, okay?
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: he doesnt say a lot of interesting things really
[👎 2]
Lando: hello?? this isnt natiknal "bully lando day"
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: thats cus thats every day
~Lewis +44 7774 4xx xxx: back to the point
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: YES!!
the hypothetical question
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: which, AGAIN!!, is purely hypothetical
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: nothing real or true about it
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: obviously
~Charles +377 xx xx xx xx: ???
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: …sure…
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: say, HYPOTHETICALLY, that you are moving in with your best friend
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: and the two of you got a bunch of stuff from ikea
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: and then the two of you are realising that you might not know how to read the manual
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: let me guess
hypothetically?
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: EXACTLY
what are we supposed to do???
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: *what are not we HYPOTHETICALLY supposed to do???
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: lmao
~George +44 7463 xxx xxx: Don't patronise the kids, Max.
~Charles +377 xx xx xx xx: yeah max
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: ??
okay
rude
Logan: I have it on good authorisation that somebody moved in who is an actual expert in building ikea furniture
So for ur hypothetical situation
Id ask him
Lando: oscar??
Logan: Lmao
Nope
For sum1 who studies engineering
I do NOT trust him to hold a hammer
[🖕]
You: it was 1 time, ive gotten better since
Logan: I, on the other hand, am an expert @ this
So if u still need help-hypothetical or not-i can come over
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: …
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: …
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: …
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: apartment nr is 4.03
You: ill send him over with some timtams
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: TY!!
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: tenk yoe!!
but what are timtams
Logan: Well i have to say
Ive never seen oscar sprint out of the room so fast
Were coming over!
~Daniel +61 4xx xxx xxx: omg timtams
im coming over as well
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: doesnt clear up ANYTHING but suree
the more the marry
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: pretty sure its marrier
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: pretty sure its not
Lando: the mire the maerryer
~George +44 7463 xxx xxx: Somehow that's even worse. It's 'merrier'. Also be careful who you let into the apartment. You don't want to have any strangers over, lest they have bad intentions.
~Carlos +34 655 xxx xxx: isn't everybody who lives in this building also in this chat?
so is anybody really a stranger here?
~Alex +44 7423 xxx xxx: well, we all know how lando is
especially with free snacks
i wouldn't want to have him around either
[👎]
Lando: fucketh you
~Carlos +34 655 xxx xxx: you know i love you, yes?
Lando: ye
~Carlos +34 655 xxx xxx: absolutely the fuck not
~Alex +44 7423 xxx xxx: carlooos
important!!!
did lando rush out of the apartment for the free snacks yet?
~Carlos +34 655 xxx xxx: just left
nevermind
he just walked back in
his face is flushed tho
weird
~Alex +44 7423 xxx xxx: huh
~George +44 7463 xxx xxx: huh
~Max +31 6 xx xx xx xx: huh
~Lewis +44 7774 4xx xxx: huh
~Fernando +34 614 xxx xxx: huh
~Kimi +39 3xx xxxxxxx: huh
~Ollie +44 7187 xxx xxx: huh
Lando: i hate u all
─ ⋆⋅☆⋅Lando's Phone⋅☆⋅⋆ ─
[Three Amigos - Thursday February 20, 16:02]
You: Noshx9qhx9qjx9qnznsak
George: Well hello there, Lando. We were wondering where the fuck you've been for the past hour.
Alex: first of all: what is that keyboard smash
You: a oerfectly respectable oen
Alex: absolutely not
there is an art to it
You: no there isnt??
tf u talking anout??
Alex: yes there is??
George: Alex is right, you know. You should try to contain yourself to the middle row of your keyboard.
You: i dont contain myself to anythig gerogr u shid now that
esp with something as simpel as a thid
it luks gud
🖕
George: Nothing about this looks good.
Alex: or you
You: bro thats uncalled for tf
Alex: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
swhat you get for trying to weasel your way out of this convo
You: mates
fuck u2
Alex: omg not the band what did they do wrong?
George: Exist
You: ???
you fuckers
y ami friends with u again
Alex: because you love us
George: Because we kidnapped you and now it's too late to turn back
You: 🖕🖕🖕🖕
Alex: didnt know you had four hands
George: Regardless. Care to explain what happened?
Why Carlos texted that you turned around from free snacks.
Were they that shit?
You: georgie y u text so much u never doubletext
George: I can text casually.
Including sending multiple texts.
Alex: the full stops at the end of your sentences would say otherwise
You: no bcus normally im texting wit the dicitoanry ur so formal
Alex: i feel like im talking to the two ends of the texting spectrum here tbh
George: Okay well fuck you too mate. Don't come whining here if the rest of the building makes fun of whatever combination you come up with next
You: k but
you 2 canNOT laugh about this pls
im already emberrased
embrassed
embarrsaed
embarsed
George: embarrassed
You: yeah that
Alex: lmao what did you do tho
throw hot tea over one of the new residents
nah wait you dont drink tea
stumble over your feet and fell down the stairs?
but we wouldve gotten pics of that
You: fuck you
Alex: you walked into your ex in the hallway cause he moved into the building
You: define 'ex'
Alex: walked out without wearing pants on
wait
George: Is that why you left the chat?
Lando?
Alex: lando dont you dare leave now
lando
LANDOO
You: well im not suer if i can say ex here
cus we
yknow
were never really official??
George: 🤦
Wait hold on
You don't mean
Alex: oh this is hilarious
You: george dont finish that
i hate you both
hoenstly
George: Sure you do 😘
Alex: no you dont
You: 🖕🖕
Alex: back to two arms buddy?
You: N E WEY
@George
hows everything between you and max now?
Alex: Lando, kindly:
go fuck yourself
George: everythings peachy mate
Don't know why you'd need to know that?
Alex: deflection
couldve taken a different approach tho 😒
George: And why are you so pressed about how me and Max are doing?
Alex: Nothing important
Really
Forget about it please
George: okay?
[Private Chat between You and Alex - Thursday February 20, 21:52]
Alex: lando when i catch you i SWEAR
You: thot you loved me
Alex: strongly reconsidering
i told you that in private
You: first mistake
shudve thot about that before you made fun of me
Alex: I hate you
You: no you dont :)