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lay on your rooftop in the freezing cold

Summary:

"You could've died!"

"That was the point."

Notes:

i tried to kill myself today and was thwarted so im making my biggest kin get the comfort i wish i had gotten. spent the whole day throwing up tylenol in the hospital and all i got were grippy socks and disappointed glances. no hug, no comfort. just a "what were you trying to do." idk mom, like three doctors and myself just said i deliberately tried to OD, so maybe THAT's what i was trying to do! "what was i supposed to do, just come home and find you dead?" uhhhh, yep!

fun fact, the irl Akutagawa Ryunosuke killed himself on my birthday (july 24th)

Work Text:

"Oh my god, Ryuunosuke!"

Akutagawa looked up from watching the nurse tuck the I.V. into his vein to see Atsushi, his darling Atsushi, standing in the doorway of his emergency care room. His hair was a mess, and he was still in his work clothes, and his beautiful eyes were wide and distraught. The nurse looked up and smiled.

"You're the boyfriend, I assume?" she asked, taping the I.V. down and pulling the needle. "I'm just about done here."

Atsushi nodded, panting as he leaned against the doorframe. "Yes." He looked at Akutagawa. "I came as fast as I could," he said, and Akutagawa's heart twisted. The nurse simply nodded and clicked a few things on the computer before patting the rail of Akutagawa's cot.

"Alrighty, all set!" she announced. "I'll let you two alone while you finish this bag, and the doctor will be in shortly to ask you a few questions, alright?"

Akutagawa nodded, and Atsushi moved from the doorway to let the nurse leave. He and Akutagawa stared at each other for a moment or two before Atsushi surged forward and hugged him as best as he could with the rail and the I.V. in the way.

"I was so worried, Ryuu," he whispered. Akutagawa brought his free arm up to pat at Atsushi's back. "Gin's on her way. Christ, Ryuu, what was going through your head?" he asked, pulling back to look into his eyes. He was crying, cheeks red and eyes watery. "You could've called me!"

"I know."

"You could've died!"

"That was the point."

Atsushi froze, eyes welling up further. "Right," he responded weakly, watery. "Yeah."

"..."

Akutagawa looked away.

Atsushi sighed shakily. "You're going to be okay, Ryuu," he promised. "We'll get through this."

As he motioned for Atsushi to come closer, wrapped in a warm loving hug once more, Akutagawa kind of believed him.