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This was a terrible idea, he should stop himself and go home before he made a mistake. He’d given himself a boundary and was fighting every fiber of his being not to cross it.
But when he looked into her big brown eyes. Makeup running from the heat inside the club. Rain clinging to her purple hair strands sticking to her face and a cigarette on her breath. He felt his will crumbling faster than his skull.
Even with makeup smudged, she looked amazing, the smog reflecting off her skin in a glow.
Ariana Beatrice Estella Mendoza.
His neighbor, the photographer, the woman who was at his apartment every morning with her sister. She’d stumbled into his life through the fire escape a year ago and never looked back.
She was so beautiful. Alcohol was fogging up his mind but all he wanted to do was kiss her. Pull her close and never let go.
He really needed to leave.
Let her think he was the same stupid Jason who was flaky and couldn’t keep a job. The guy she helps with his bike. Completely keep the murderous crime boss turned vigilante, far away from her. That’s who he was though, both versions an absolute mess. He doubted she’d actually care.
She’d say something about seeing through him regardless of his bizarre hobbies.
She was shivering clinging to him for warmth. “Jason. “she whispered softly into the hot Gotham air. Sending a shiver down his spine. He could be a coward and they’d never talk about it again. This moment will have never of happened.
Instead his hands find her waist, pulling her close, his heart pounding in his chest. Pounding “I shouldn’t do this. “ he mutters out loud tightening his grip.
She leans forward shifting into his space, “Then don’t. “ She whispers lips ghosting over his own. He takes a deep breath and traces his hand down her jaw. She let out a gentle hum at his touch.
She wanted this too.
He took swallowed, his pride and crushed her into a kiss. Her hands crumpled the leather of his jacket, holding on to it and anchoring him into place.
She was so soft in his arms, as warmth spread throughout his body.
A storm was rolling in sending a cold wind to cover them in more rain. Jason didn’t care.
How could he when he was pinning her to a wall and her hands were tangled in his hair. Pressed against the brick, cars speeding by; all he could feel was her- the taste of nicotine and cheap vodka mixing on her tongue. The quickened pace of her heart and rushed.
Despite the ache in his bones or the silent dread seeping in about what this would change. He was on fire, a blazing heat that would consume every part of her he could take.
Reality didn’t come crashing back until they broke apart. Clinging to one another gasping for air in the fog. He pressed his forehead against her studying every detail of her face. Her cheeks were flushed, pupils blown wide, each breath fighting her fatigue. “Hey,” she smiles at him moving her hand to cup his face “I know that look on your face, stop thinking okay.“
He laughs at her and shakes his head “You make it sound simple. “
Her thumb brushes over his cheek. Slowly tracing the edge of his scars like they were something precious. He tried to pull away from her touch but she held him in place. “You don’t scare me. “
He didn’t answer leaving them in silence as the city continued to hum around them. Jason shut his eyes tight fearful she’d vanish if he dared to look. Her fingers wandered down to the back of his neck, carefully weaving her fingers through his hair. “Don’t go” she murmurs.
Her words cut through him like a knife to the chest. His chest ached at the thought of abandoning her in the rain. Going home and locking the door, never opening it to another soul.
“You don’t want this Ari…” his voice came out rough and shaky when he spoke. He loosens his hold and takes a step back. Opening his eyes expecting to see betrayal on her rain-streaked face.
“I think I can decide what I want for myself. “Ari makes him stay, staring through his scars and anger.
Somehow, she wasn’t scared when she saw him. Her hands didn’t shake or shiver at his touch.
He ignores his sense of reasoning and pulls her into his chest. Wrapping his arms around her back and burying his face into her hair. He could smell the cheap lavender scent of her shampoo. The mix of powdery chemicals and sweat was oddly comforting. She didn’t smell sterile and clean like the bat cave. But despite her upbringing in crime alley—she didn’t have the same sticky rot that seemed to haunt their city.
It was getting cold, she was shivering in his arms as the storm raged on. “Yeah, okay.” He whispers, pressing another kiss into her scalp. He shrugged off his jacked and wrapped it around her frame. “Let’s go home. “
She nods at him, pulling his jacket tighter around her shoulders and taking his hand. “Okay.”
They didn’t talk when their apartments, separating to wash off the rain before continuing their evening. Jason dripped water onto his hardwood floor, stumbling into the kitchen to make some coffee. He hoped hot liquid would keep him warm until he combed through his feelings.
Tomorrow was going to be a long day filled with uncomfortable questions. Maybe he should text his brother.
No, that was just the alcohol and adrenaline talking. There was no way in hell he was going to ask Dick for relationship advice. He liked Ari, the last thing he wanted to do was scare her away with some half-baked idea from the original Robin.
No Dick was absolutely not an option. He just needed to sip his coffee and think about what was a floor above him.
He needed to shower, let the hot water rid him of his conflictions. He could barely feel it regardless of how red his skin got. Another inconvenience of dying and coming back to life, his nerves were beyond fucked. The water was scalding down his shoulder, rolling down his spine and cleansing him of her touch. He rested against the tile, letting the water burn his face. She was stuck in his head, visions of her in the smog echoing through the steam. She had taken over his mind like an infection, infesting his senses.
He could barely feel the water burning his skin but she was etched into him completely. Her lips pressed to his, the warmth of her skin. The way she pulled his jacket close and asked him not to go…
He shuts off the faucet, stepping out as the water dripped down his tense muscles. He wrapped himself in a towel staring at his reflection in the mirror above the sink. His skin was raw, irritated from the heat. He looked like a mess, painting at himself while his heart pounced. ‘pull it together’ he huffed shaking his head. He looked insane, eyes puffy and plagued with exhaustion. The insanity that lived inside of him was slowly seeping back into reality.
He'd been beaten, shot, stabbed and killed. He’d clawed himself out of his own grave! Yet the scariest thing he’d ever down was kiss someone? He dragged a hand over his face and groaned, ‘grow the fuck up Todd.’ He steps away from the mirror, tired of staring into his own taunting eyes.
He grabbed a pair of sweat pants, ignoring the chill of his empty apartment. He ran his fingers through his damp hair, tugging hard to gain a better focus. He treaded down hall into his kitchen taking a sip of his coffee. He frowned, at the taste, it had grown cold in the time it'd taken him to return. He set the mug down with a soft clink, rubbing his thumb along the rim like he could coax warmth back into it.
The apartment felt too big, every creak of the pipes too loud. He hated this part—the stillness. Stillness meant thinking, and thinking meant unraveling.
His phone buzzed on the counter.
Jason stiffened. Too late for anyone decent. Too early for trouble.
He flipped it over, expecting some gang trying to start a war or Roy sending memes at ungodly hours. Instead:
Ari: “Are you awake?”
He stared at the screen. Heart thudding hard against his ribs.
She lived one floor away.
He could practically hear her pacing upstairs if he focused hard enough. The rain pelted the windows, the storm still going strong, and suddenly the building felt less empty.
He picked up his phone, hands shaking as he typed.
Jason: Yeah, what’s up?
It wasn’t the best response to everything, but it’s the best he could do with baited breath.
Ari: Are you okay?
Those three little words hit him like a bullet. ‘Are you okay?’
It wasn’t an unusual question; he’d been asked it hundreds of times. By Alfred, by Bruce, by doctors, detectives, people who wanted him to stay alive for one reason or another.
It was different with Ari though, the words were heavy in a way he didn’t know how to carry.
He swallowed hard and typed back before he could stop himself:
Jason: Yeah. Just… thinking.
He stared at the bubble as it sent, cursing himself. Thinking. Real smooth. Real honest. Like thinking was ever a normal state for him.
A few seconds passed. Then his phone buzzed again.
Ari: Can I come down?
Jason froze.
His breath caught in his throat, an involuntary rush of heat spiraling through his chest. Every instinct in him screamed, not because he didn’t want her there, but because he did. Because if she walked through his door now, after what happened in the alley. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to pretend he didn’t care about her anymore.
Jason: It’s late.
He immediately regretted sending the message.
She replied almost instantly.
Ari: I know.
Ari: Celeste is at a friend’s
He read the second message twice, stomach twisting into knots.
If Celeste wasn’t home, they didn’t have to worry about her sneaking out past his window. Ari wouldn’t have to rush back upstairs to avoid suspicion. It was stupid how much that single line affected him.
It meant Ari wasn’t just stepping out, she was choosing to see him.
Without an excuse.
Without her sister as a buffer, reason or safety net.
Jason: I’m out of coffee,
He winced, scrunching his face like his words had caused him physical pain.
Brilliant, genius-level flirting.
He stared at the message sitting pathetic and alone in the chat window.
Not “come over,”
not “I want to see you,”
not even something normal like “door’s unlocked.”
Just: I’m out of coffee.
Like that somehow conveyed the hurricane inside his chest.
He dragged a hand over his face, muttering under his breath, “Idiot.”
Before he could spiral further, his phone buzzed.
Ari: I can bring some.
He blinked, knowing she didn’t have coffee at her apartment. She always came to him in the morning on her way out to work. Another message immediately followed.
Ari: Or… I can just come down, coffee optional.
His apartment felt too still, too quiet, like it was holding its breath with him.
He typed with fingers that wouldn’t stop shaking.
Jason: Yeah. Okay.
He started to set the phone down until it buzzed once more, stopping his hand.
Ari: Door unlocked?
Jason let out a breath that wasn’t really a laugh, wasn’t really a sigh. More like disbelief wrapped in nerves.
His fingers hovered.
Jason: For you? Always.
Dread and hope twisted together inside him.
He heard the door close upstairs as her quiet footsteps headed towards the stairs.
She wasn’t rushing.
She wasn’t sneaking.
She was coming because she wanted to.
Jason swallowed hard, pulse kicking in his throat.
He suddenly wished he’d put on a shirt. Or cleaned the table. Or looked less like a man unraveling in the dark.
A gentle knock tapped against the door, pulling him from his thoughts. Jason crossed the room, his hand hovering for half a second before he gripped the knob and pulled the door open.
Ari stood there in his jacket, hood pushed back, rain still clinging to her lashes. Her cheeks were flushed from the cold, her hair messy from the humidity. She held no coffee in her hands. “Hey,” she breathed, almost smiling.
Jason opened his mouth, unsure what was going to come out.
She stepped inside before he could find words, close enough that his chest brushed her shoulder as she passed. He shut the door behind her.
Ari’s eyes drifted down his chest, smile spreading across her lips letting out a huff in amusement. Jason’s heartbeat stuttered, a flush returning to his face as he tracked her stare.
He only had a towel draped around his neck, the rest of his chest damp, bare and every scar glistening on display. He cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment looking anywhere but her.
“Sorry,” he muttered. “Didn’t really… think to change.” Her gaze snapped back to his face, eyebrows lifting in something gentle.
“You don’t have to apologize,” she said, stepping a little closer. “You look fine.”
He snorted. “You mean ‘fine for someone whose been beaten half to death.’”
She didn’t laugh.
Didn’t even hesitate.
“No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “I meant fine.”
The apartment seemed to shrink with how close she was now. The rain outside dulled to a low roar, muffled beneath her quiet presence.
Jason’s breath hitched.
His fingers twitched at his sides, aching to reach for her but terrified to move.
Ari tilted her head slightly, watching him with those big brown eyes that had undone him hours ago. Her voice softened even further.
“Jason… can I—?”
She didn’t finish.
Didn’t need to.
Because she’d already stepped into his space, close enough for her warmth to brush against his bare skin, close enough that he could smell the faint sweetness of lavender and city rain tangled together.
He didn’t back away, taking her hand into his own when she reached out. He brought her hand to his chest letter her brush her fingers over the marks littering his skin. Her touch was light, careful.
Jason exhaled, shaky and uneven.
Ari searched his face, waiting for the moment he would bolt. Something inside him cracked wide open. He stepped closer, just enough to feel her breath against his collarbone, just enough to let her know he wasn’t running. Her hand slid higher, fingers barely grazing the line of a scar on his shoulder.
He didn’t flinch.
Not this time.
She looked up at him, eyes soft and sure, waiting, not pushing, not assuming—just waiting.
Jason’s resolve crumbled.
He lifted his hand, slow and deliberate, brushing a damp strand behind her ear. His knuckles grazed her cheek, and she leaned into the touch like it was instinct.
He swallowed hard.
“Come here,” he whispered.
Ari closed the last inch between them, rising onto her toes as her free hand slid up his ribs. He felt every point of contact like it lit a fuse under his skin.
She stopped just before their lips touched.
Close enough that her breath mixed with his.
Close enough that her lashes brushed his cheek when she blinked.
Close enough to make his pulse roar in his ears.
“Jason,” she murmured, barely a sound at all.
He had survived a crowbar, a bomb, resurrection, countless bullets, a graveyard of failures.
None of it had prepared him for the way she said his name.
Soft.
Uncertain.
Wanting.
He didn’t realize he’d moved until his forehead found hers. Gentle, grounding, something too intimate to be accidental. He tilted her chin upward, thumb brushing the corner of her mouth in a question he didn’t know how to voice.
Ari answered him tired of waiting. The kiss was gentle and slow, cautious against his lips. She pulled back just enough for him to see hope flickering behind her eyes. “Is this, okay?”
He huffed a shaky, disbelieving laugh. “Yeah.”
His hand cupped the side of her face, fingers sliding into the damp ends of her hair. Her lips parted, soft and real. He kissed her slowly, gentle, memorizing the curve of her lips against his.
She pulled on the towel around his neck tugging him close. Jason felt her melt against him, felt the tremor in her breath as she angled her head, meeting him with just as much need as he tried and failed to contain.
It wasn’t desperate like in the alley.
It was worse.
It was steady. Intentional.
The kind that meant something.
The kind that terrified him.
Ari broke the kiss first. Nose brushing against him, her lips still grazing his own.
She smiled up at him breathlessly happy.
“There you are,” she whispered, thumb stroking his jaw.
Jason laughed under his breath, the sound rough and uneven. “Sorry, I’m not very good at this.”
She pressed a tiny, teasing kiss to the corner of his mouth. “You seem to be doing alright to me, but I’m not good at this either.” she said softly.
He didn’t trust himself to speak, so he didn’t, deciding to kiss her again.
Deeper this time, hungrier, pulling her fully against him. His hands sliding under his jacket and up her back, every part of him screaming to keep her close. His mind raced with a million thoughts, but he ignored them all. The only one that mattered right now was her. Ari breathing against his mouth. Ari with a hand placed against his abdomen, feeling up his scars- heat spreading everywhere she touched. Her fingers traced a line upward, following the contour of a scar like she was learning it by heart.
“Careful” Jason rasped in surprise at the wave that washed over him.
“Why?” she whispered, “you’re not.”
Her body pressed into his, soft where he was tense, warm where he was shaking.
He clenched his jaw.
“Because if you keep touching me like that—”
“What?” she asked, barely a breath. “You’ll finally admit that you want me?”
He inhaled sharply through his teeth.
Heat surged through him, immediate and overwhelming.
Ari rose onto her toes, chest brushing his.
Her fingers slid higher, over the ridges of his ribs, up to the center of his chest.
“You think I didn’t know?” she murmured, breathing softly against his ear. Jason grabbed her wrist anchoring himself with the rhythm of her pulse under his thumb.
He dipped his head, mouth grazing against her cheek, tracing down the corner of her jaw. “Last chance,” he muttered, voice low against her skin.
Ari exhaled shakily, her hand slipping from his chest to curl around the back of his neck.
Her fingers wove into his damp hair, tugging just enough to draw a rough sound from him.
“I didn’t come all the way down here to swap schedules.”
That was it.
He brought her further into his apartment, pulling her against him. Ari’s breath caught as he moved his hand down her waist. He lifted her onto the counter swallowing the sounds she made when his hands squeezed her thigh.
Her hands slid over his shoulders, down his arms, palms flat against his biceps like she needed the solidity of him. He lifted her onto the counter resting between her thighs,
Her fingers trailed down his chest, over every scar, every line he tried to hide from the world, completely open to her display.
He broke the kiss only long enough to breathe against her mouth, voice unsteady, hot against her shoulder. “I want my jacket back.”
“You’ll have to rip it off of me,” she breathed. “It’s very warm.”
He growls nipping gently at her cleavage “I’m going to do far more than that. “ she moans, nails digging into his skin, legs wrapping around his waist pulling him closer.
Thunder clangs outside the apartment rattling the window as he lays her out. After all these years of quiet mornings and carpool, he couldn’t believe they were doing this. Her body hot against his, electricity running through him as she came undone at his touch.
The storm blew through the night, drowning out the sounds of their heat. Hours passed and night turned to day. Sun crept In through the blinds, illuminating the living room in a warm glow. A blanket was loosely draped over the couch covering the two as they slept tangled in each other’s arms. Ari woke first, groaning against Jason’s chest still sore from the night before.
“Shit,” she whispered staring at Jason’s sleeping face. She pressed a kiss into the corner of his mouth, nudging him awake “Jason we don’t have any coffee.”
His arms tighten around her waist and he presses a kiss into her hair as he wakes from his slumber. “We’ll just have to survive on memory then. “his grip was firm, hiding the fear that had bubbled for just a moment when he was pulled from his dreams.
“You should take me to get coffee.” She whined into his neck snuggling against his hold.
“Maybe later. “ he hummed “for now, I just want to enjoy this feeling of you annoying me in bed.”
“You’re over thinking again aren’t you. “ she reached up and ran a calming hand through his hair.
“You have no idea. “ he chuckled staring up at the ceiling towards her apartment.
“I think I might, I’ve lived above you for years. “ she responded gently.
Jason only sighed looking down at her, a softness in his gaze. “Let’s get you some coffee.” He tried to push her off to sit up.
“No, Jason. “ she stopped him, pressing down his chest and rising up to make him look at her. “ I can live without coffee if it means you’re okay. “
If he was being honest, he didn’t know. He was feeling so many conflicting things all at once. He’d felt more alive last night then he had in years. Her body pressed against his, pulling him tighter until they were both undone.
It wasn’t just sex, he knew that, it was her. She brought out something in him that was better than all the shit he’d been through. It wasn’t perfect and neither was she, but maybe they could work. She brought out the good I’m him, and he took care of her. Let her be tired and out of control, safe where she least expected.
He kissed her again, gentle and warm, everything he was thinking washed away. “I’m okay Ari, I’ve got you.
And he embraced everything he could ever want.