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Honestly, he didn't love her. To Stu, Nina was just a quick lay, and she happened to be friendly towards him, so it was a plus that they meshed. It became almost routine to know how their interactions would go. She would come over, they'd chit-chat, and while they chatted, he'd ease her dress off her while she unzipped his pants. They'd continue chatting without missing a beat while he was fucking her, and if they didn't want to continue with the small talk, they'd just kiss each other, which is usually what happened. He'd bite her lip while she clawed his back. They liked the tingly pain. They liked a lot of the same things: music taste, movies, and kinks. Having a lot of things in common also made being friends with benefits a lot easier than what he had going on with Murdoc and Paula. Where Paula wanted a commitment and Murdoc didn't know what he wanted, Nina was no-strings-attached and knew that it was going to be that way.
Then Nina got pregnant.
Stu lay underneath his bed, ignoring everything and everyone. Was this childish of him to do? Yes, very much so, but he didn't claim to be a mature person. Sure, Nina was the one who was going to be going through all the physical changes and is growing a baby inside her, but what about him? He was going to have to accept the responsibility of taking care of a baby and being attached to somebody. His anxiety levels were off the rails, but also, in a way, he was mourning the carefree life he had had. He didn't know what he had until it was taken from him. As he isolated himself from everybody, there was one constant in his life, and that was the texts he would receive in the morning and evening from Nina. They were simple: "Good morning, Stu. Hope you're doing okay," and "Good night, Stu. Try to sleep well." He never responded to them, but he looked forward to receiving them. Despite his being terrified of what was to come, he did start to miss seeing Nina. He missed hearing her slightly raspy but sweet voice, feeling her skin underneath his fingertips, and her floral scent. It was all the physicalness that he missed from her, so when she came by on a business visit two months after telling him she was pregnant, he didn't hesitate to hug her tightly when they were alone. This wasn't love to him, though. It was a need that he was fulfilling.
Noodle kicked him out, and Stu was forced to move in with Nina. After he put away his belongings, he went and walked around the house. It was strange to think that this place was now his place to call home now as it didn't feel like he belonged. He had been to Nina's place a few times, but it was only ever a one-night stay. Now he lived here. He was going to share the same bed as her, dress in the same restroom, eat in the same dining room, and raise a child together. He never expected this to happen. In fact, it terrified him that he was going to be settling into what he considered a normal life routine. Where were his night blenders? What had become of the tango dance that he and Murdoc played with one another? Now it all disappeared into a drab life. The first night he lay in Nina's bed beside her, he was restless. His mind wouldn't calm down, and he felt as if he couldn't settle down, but as the days went on, his restlessness subsided. The routine that he dreaded having became a comfort to him. Every weekday, he'd hear Nina's alarm clock go off, the jingle of the Meow Mix commercial letting him know that she was going to be getting ready for work. He never got up with her, but as she tried to leave the bed, he'd try to pull her back. She'd let out giggles that were music to his ears and then say, "Come on, Stu. I'm going to be late," and with that, he'd lie back down and fall back to sleep. To fill the time that Nina was away, he'd tinker around on his keyboards, play video games, or try and do some chores from a list Nina would text him (but he'd quickly give up on doing chores because they were tedious to him, but at least he tried). When Nina got home from work, Stu instantly found himself drawn to her. He never asked her questions about her day, but he felt as if he needed to be around her. After taking her shoes off, Nina would go and sit on the couch, where Stu followed and would sit beside her. She'd rest her head on his shoulder, and Stu felt the urge to always kiss the top of her head. Why was he so terrified of this before? For the first time in his life, Stu felt as if he was loved. He didn't know if he loved Nina or if he loved the convenience of what their routine had brought, but if that was as close to loving her as he was going to get, then he would accept that.
It was the middle of the night, and Stu had just put down the baby after a feeding. He stared down at the baby as he slumbered in his crib, with a stuffed cat in a corner of the crib. Stu tucked a baby blanket over his body before leaving the nursery. It had been a few months since the baby was released from NCIU after being born prematurely. Stu remembered how depressed Nina became. She blamed herself for the early delivery, and all Stu could offer was telling her it didn't matter because their baby was being taken care of. "Their" baby. He still couldn't believe that he and Nina had a baby, even though he does midnight feedings. Nina had said she didn't mind doing them, but Stu pushed to do them, telling her that she needed her rest. Which look at him, he no longer thinks of just himself. He's thinking of how to make life easier for Nina. He used to be so selfish that he would lock himself in his room if things became too much for him. He only stopped being selfish because he was forced to take on the role of caregiver. Stu slipped back into bed and looked over at Nina. Her face was relaxed as she slept, her lips slightly parted as she quietly snored. As he stared at her, he thought of how he couldn't imagine a life without her, and before he knew it, something clicked. Stu sat up and gently shook Nina's shoulder.
"Nina, Nina, I need to tell you somethin'."
"Huh, what is it? Is the baby okay?" Nina said groggily.
"Yeah, he's fine. Just..."
"Just what?"
"I think I love you."
As the words sank in, Nina's lips turned upward into a smile, "I love you too."
Stu gently kissed her before they both returned to lying down. So this is love. Stu has never felt more at peace.