Work Text:
He looks at his hands. What was supposed to be blue was purple and black. Jagged rivers and valleys bled ink. It dripped onto the carpet below as the ichor painted over the deep deep bruises. The black mixed with salt from tears. Astro sobs and sobs. Why did he do that? What is wrong with him? He deserves this…he picked back up the scissor. He heard the slice of the blade and the sting. He cuts and cuts and cuts. He deserved this, he was a bad supporter. His arms leaked more of the blood. Astro sighed, he needs to clean himself up before anyone notices.
The sink turned out and water splashed out. His arms rinsed and ichor went down the drain. Fresh scars covered his arms, wrists, and palms. He got some medical gauze to keep them clean and hidden. The gauze winded like a snake hissing as it wrapped around, covering the stinging, constricting his arms. There, no body, no crime, no scars, never happened. He wrapped himself up in his blanket, warm and cozy and hidden.
He walked around the center, greeting the book club and chatting with them for a bit. None of them noticed his injuries, good. Eventually he said goodbye and attempted to avoid attention. During his scuffle he bumped into Vee.
“Hey watch it… oh it’s just you Astro,” he electronic eyes scoured over Astro. His status updated into her system as she scanned him. “Are you hurt?”
“no..no I’m fine,” he lied
“My system says otherwise,” she said in a blunt tone.
“just a scratch, promise,” he downplayed
She frowns and starts to pull at his blanket as Astro instinctively pulls back. “Astro..” he flinched and started to back away. “Astro!” She grabbed his collar, as his blanket flared up from the impact. Vee saw the bandages. A sick feeling settled into her stomach, heavy and painful. She had a feeling she desperately wanted to be wrong, but the system never lied.“Astro..my room … now .”
“Yes.. yes ma’am..” he mumbled, knowing confrontation was inevitable. Dreadful.
“Good, now march” she added a pressure on his shoulder from her hand, running away from his problems was not an option he could pick. He gets moved by her strength, forced to walk, but the speed Vee was moving him was hard to keep up with. He started to stumble but Vee caught him. She easily lifted him up into her arms and put him into a comfortable position. “Come on , let’s go,” she spoke with an unusually warm and gentle tone. She carried him to her personal bedroom. Astro decided to take the opportunity to cuddle up, he was an absolute cuddle bug but not many people snuggled with him.
“Are you…? Cuddling?” She snickered
“ like you don’t enjoy it..” Astro grumbled, but did feel slightly guilty. Vee rolled her eyes but didn’t fight him as it gave her a hint on how to comfort him. Her bedroom door creaked open and she dropped him into her large bed. He flopped with a quiet oomf.
“Arms, now,” Vee spoke demanding
“I..” he started to make excuses but realized it was useless “yes… “ he submitted as he showed his four bandaged arms. Vee carefully removed each one as a fresh layer of scab. She grimaced as the gore but kept her filter on.
“Did you clean these?”
Nod
“ disinfect them?”
….
She sighed and huffed, “stay here,” she booped his nose as a way to accentuate her point. He nodded and stayed still, trying to keep scab off the bed. Vee is already stuck with him, the least he could do is keep her bed clean. Vee looked through the first aid kit and returned with the tube in her rubber hands. “Arms out” she commanded. He obliged. She glazed the disaffectant on his sore raw arms. One arm. Two arms, three, four, Done. She wipes her non-existent sweat and looks at him. Her voice shifted to a more kind one, “let’s wrap these back up” she gets fresh gauze and rewrap his arms, they curl around but not serpentine like before. More like a warm hug for each limb. He sighed in a quiet soft voice.
Vee looked at him, gazing up, “you can lay down ya know,” she spoke nonchalantly, “you like to cuddle right?”
Astro blushed blue and nodded
“Come on, get your cuddles” she lays on her bed , knowing Astro needed and craved affection and touch. Little did she know how touch starved he really was. She felt his warm body curl up. His arms winced slightly, but he snuggled deeper. He didn’t need this, his brain said, but his body was addicted despite his guilt. She carefully wrapped her arms around him which made Astro react more. He shook slightly, shoulders trembling as he was held. Then the sobs started.
After finally getting the touch he so desperately wanted he just broke. He was pathetic, dumb, useless. He hurt himself, on purpose, here was Vee comforting, encouraging his bad behavior. He didn’t deserve it. Yet he was too selfish to let go, he didn’t want to let go.
“Astro” Vee spoke, but he ignored her, not wanting to be scolded.
“Astro” he refused to look up
“It’s not your fault,” Vee’s voice rang out, clear and unmistakable. he froze, how can it not be his fault?
“What…” he whispered still hiding in her chest
“It’s not your fault.” She lifted his head so he could meet her screen. “You can’t control when you feel distressed and desperate for relief” she rubbed his cheek soothingly, offering comfort. “ Astro I understand your pain, I’ve had it myself, you're not alone, and you shouldn’t blame yourself,” she hugged him tightly. Holding him, making sure he was secure. She hates it, seeing him in this state. Astro started to cry again. He choked on his own tears. His sobs were loud and ugly, but Vee didn’t care, she rocked him slightly, hushing him until he quieted. She felt Astro sag into her robotic body. He was exhausted, so so so tired, physically, emotionally, and mentally.
Vee shifted him in her arms, despite knowing she should put him down to sleep, she didn’t want to. She was comfortable enough, he could sleep on her. She doesn’t mind, she liked it even. Astro was so sleepy and cute at this moment, much better than the earlier stress that painted his face. She’ll let him rest for now, he needs rest