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0.
You are Donna Troy, and you are nothing at all.
A mote of stardust, floating in the infinite veil of the goddess Nyx, pulled along as she wreathes the Earth in night again and again.
But she knows you and she loves you--you are her favorite would-be star. It seems she knows something that you don't.
She keeps you close and nurses you into reality, until you are a true star. You are not the biggest, nor the brightest, nor the best known, but still she holds you closer than ever. You try to stretch your rays into more than a spark in the shroud of Nyx, try to earn the attention she has already given you, but it is simply beyond your abilities. You, shining brighter than ever, remain unnoticed by all but the goddess.
Or so you think. A wish, a powerful, wondrous wish, pulls you from the veil and down to the Earth. The goddess allows it, and grants you her blessing as you shoot across the sky, away from her for the first time:
"Always remember, my little star--before you were anything, you were loved. This is the heart of your existence."
You arrive in light and power, wreathed in a black veil of your own. When you open your eyes for the first time, you are greeted by a fellow child. She is small and young, but her bearing is regal, full of strength and love. So much love. She is a wonder.
She tells you who you are.
"You are Donna Troy, and you are my sister."
2.
You are Donna Troy, and you are a child of wonder.
You belong to the Isle of the Amazons, Themyscira, a kingdom of ageless women. A kingdom with no children until your sister, Princess Diana, was born. She was wanted, prayed for by her mother the queen so feverishly that even the gods of Olympus were moved to action.
Diana was a gift, a miracle, a wonder. But she was also alone. A child must grow into an adult, but Diana was fated to grow in solitude. The women around her were her sisters, but how could they know? What it was like to grow? To discover? Amazons are born from the souls of fallen warriors, fully formed, full of knowledge. They are magnificent teachers, but the joy of learning, of becoming--it is foreign to them.
And so you were wanted. A friend, a true sister to share and witness the world with. Someone to grow alongside. Every night, Diana stole out to the shoreline to wish upon the same star--a twinkling little ember clearly outshone by its neighbors, but shining on with all its strength. Her favorite star.
And so you arrived. A new child, an ever-present companion. The Second Princess, Donna of Themyscira.
The Second Princess.
You come to realize that your sister, Diana, is mighty, even for an Amazon. She is the strongest, the fastest, the bravest, already at her tender age. You are blessed, perhaps with a piece of her, and so you manage to keep pace--but you never surpass. You don't dream of competing with her, your beloved sister, but in her you find all of your furthest limits--and that there is still much farther you can go. There is still more you can do to stay by her side, to not be left behind.
And so you make your peace with it, joining Diana on her adventures across the island. You make a wonderful team, filling your mother's palace with treasures rare and unknown. You are the pride of your people--or you would be, if only they could see you from within Diana's shadow. You don’t let it bother you. Instead, you work harder than ever to be a worthy partner of the First Princess, strive to be the companion she so desperately wanted. You're so close. And yet, the quietest part of you always wonders: will you ever be more than less of her?
One day, for the first time, you propose an adventure yourself: retrieving the Mirror of Menalippe from the treacherous caves of Mount Hera. Diana should have no problems with such a mission, but she is concerned about you--you assure her that you too can handle it.
And you do. All of your efforts culminate in cresting the Great Mother's mountain by your sister's side and descending into the cave at its peak. Within is the mirror, your prize. Diana is unscathed, but you are battered and bruised from the ascent. Even still, the sight of the mirror is healing. Until a wave of monsters explode out of its surface. They are the reason the mirror is here, far away from civilization. The power of you sisters two has drawn them out for the first time in millennia.
Diana fends them off with ease, quickly realizing the means to destroy them lies with the mirror. But you are overwhelmed in the brief time that takes. When she at last manages to seal away the creatures tearing at your body, there is nothing of you left.
3.
You are Donna Troy, and you are in peril.
Trapped in a burning building, a woman comes to save you--her name is Diana. She is beautiful and powerful. As you cling to life, charred and choked by the flames, she feeds you her own blood in an effort to revive you. Armed with a piece of wonder, your body begins to change. You become more like her: stronger, faster, lighter than air. When your transformation is complete, you find yourself in a foreign land: Paradise Island.
She blames herself for your new blessing, frets over your lost humanity. Diana claims you as her sister, and promises that she will always be there for you--you are her responsibility. You are now a daughter of this island by blood, but, having touched the realm of man, neither of you can stay. And so you leave.
Out in the world, she teaches you how to survive, how to fight, how to protect, how to love those weaker than yourself. You cherish every lesson. You try to be more like her.
You seek out people who think as you both do. Together, you all do good in the world, as a team. You hope you will always be together.
And you are together, for a long time. But eventually you must forge your own path--Diana says it will be good for you. Leaving her feels like losing an arm. But you form a team of your own when the time is right, and the world has never been safer. Monsters come knocking, only to be met with all of you, ready and able to send them away. You feel whole again, working to live up to her example.
But as your friends grow older, they grow more cynical. They exist in worlds darker than your own, darker than you're capable of seeing. You can't quite inspire them the way she could, and one by one they drift away, disillusioned with the mission. You try to see reality through their eyes and instead see the truth of your own--the truth of a world that would leave a little girl to burn, all alone. A world where she is still alone, still burning. As your heart jades over, you realize what your friends already know: you are nothing like your sister.
A monster comes knocking and there is only you. And then there is no one.
4.
You are Donna Troy, and you are ready to be seen.
You have trained for this moment all your life, the day you win the title of Wonder Woman, Champion of All Amazons. Not only will you face the strongest warriors from Amazon tribes across the world, but today you will finally defeat your elder sister, Diana, and prove that you are her equal.
Since the day you emerged from the Mirror of Menalippe, she has always been just out of reach. Just stronger, just faster, just better than you. No one on Themyscira knows what you're truly capable of. Today you will show them.
You dominate the competition. So does Diana. But, the night before your ultimate fight, something strange happens. You leave the celebrations only to find your sister at the beach... with a man. You have never seen a man before, except in the old scrolls, but it's clear that he's injured--and unwelcome. You plead with your sister to cast him back into the ocean he came from, to forget she ever saw him. She can't. The man has told her of war and strife in the world beyond--of people who need her strength. She's leaving the island tonight, taking only the weapons she can carry... and maybe a token from you?
You tell her to earn it in the arena tomorrow, and storm back to your party.
She doesn't appear for your fight the next day. After some time, the match is forfeit, and you are crowned Champion by default. The celebration is brief and terse--concern for Diana, the favorite to win, is at a fever pitch. Queen Hippolyta calls an island-wide search. You spend all day trying to tell her what you saw the night before, but she is beside herself with fret--she won't hear you. But as night falls, the truth finally reaches her: Diana is gone.
But the Amazons never stop searching. You are but a shadow as you go from queendom to queendom, defending and supporting the sisters of the global tribes.
Diana has made a name for herself as a hero of mankind. News of her deeds reach even the shores of Themyscira, whispered by chattering young ones who should have no concept at all of the world not their own. They chatter because she is still their Champion.
And you are not.
No one notices when you are no longer there.
5.
You are Donna Troy, and you are helpless.
Your husband, Terry, was the love of your life. But he's changed. He used to look at you so adoringly. Now he recoils at your touch. To him you're a monster, irredeemable. But your only crime was trying to make the world a better place for him and the son you've raised together. You were born with power, he was not. Your strength made him uncomfortable, but you always tried to accommodate him, you always tried not to make him feel small. Terry would get so angry whenever he felt small.
But to keep your boys safe, you knew that you had to use your gifts. For that you would never apologize. The two of them were your world--yours alone, far away from your context, far away from anyone who could tell you what to be. Who could even suggest it. The threats came constantly, harder and heavier every time. Always you were there to face them. Steadfast. Unshakable. Full of love. Just like her.
But one day the call is too close. Your power, bound by magic bracelets from your homeland, must be fully unleashed. This frightens Terry. It terrifies him. So he takes your son and runs, banishing you from their lives. A divorce, a restraining order, an identity change. Poof. Your family, right off the face of the Earth.
You have never felt so small.
Perhaps he's right. Perhaps you are a danger to your son. But he can't just do that--he can't just steal him away from you. So you follow them to their news lives across the country, watching from afar, protecting as always. You watch as Terry gets a new job. Watch as he struggles to raise your son alone. Watch as he finds a new wife. Watch as he notices just how unsafe the world is. Watch as he realizes that ejecting you from your world has done nothing to protect him.
You watch as Terry seeks out power of his own. Doing his work, uncovering ancient relics at dig sites, he unearths a pair of bracelets. They are cursed. Terry cannot see this. All he can see is the power radiating off of them. The chance to finally be strong.
He only becomes a monster.
As you finally step into the light, poised to defeat another threat, you stop yourself. The only way to end this is to destroy him. But without Terry, what do you have? No home, no family--just you.
And that might as well be nothing.
Terry’s maw closes around you. You let it happen.
6.
You are Donna Troy, and you are a weapon.
Fashioned by the Titans themselves, nothing can stop you, no one can hold you. You burst from the depths of Tartarus with one mission: kill the Wonder Woman.
You trek across the world, to the homes of the many Amazon tribes. You do not know which one she belongs to. Each tribe has their own champion, their own wonder woman, but they all know of whom you speak when you demand she be brought before you. None of them will tell you where she is, but they all warn you not to challenge her.
It is an affront to your power.
You decide to destroy them.
Yara Flor of the Esquecida is the most obstinate, but presents little challenge. Her inexperience as a warrior is her ultimate defeat. Her sisters rally to avenge her, but to destroy them would waste precious time. You leave their lands no closer to your quarry.
A foreign child called Cassandra appears to you on your journey to the northern deserts. She claims to have foreseen your arrival and endeavors to stop your quest. She only wants to talk, but she will not say what you most want to hear. You choose to beat it out of her. She is a surprise, wielding the powers of Zeus and tools blessed by the Olympians, but you dispatch her almost accidentally. In the end, she cannot answer your questions through her freshly swollen lips--but the defiance in her eyes tells you she would not have said much regardless. You leave her to die.
Artemis of the Bana-Mighdall is mighty, perhaps the only one thus far worth your time. You dodge her flaming arrows with ease, she overwhelms the battlefield, setting the rhythm with her enchanted battle axe--it is... fun. Your duel is a joy, perhaps the first joy you have ever felt. Artemis is relentless, but even in her fiery eyes is the glimmer of a smile. You narrowly best her, but you cannot bring yourself to kill her. Weakness, but she doesn't berate you for it. Artemis holds no love for the Wonder Woman, but in battle she has grown fond of you. She says you resemble her. The warrior doesn't reveal the location of the Wonder Woman, but she does reveal her name: Diana of Themyscira.
Queen Nubia of Themyscira is different. She projects pure power, but will not fight you. She says she pities you, and simply tells you where Diana is. You should take her head for such a slight. But you know better than to try, and she can tell. The seething, the anger, the drive. She sees it all and wishes you peace, calls you sister. You can’t leave fast enough.
Now you stand on a dark themysciran beach, at last face to face with the Wonder Woman, Diana. Your quarry. Your prey. Your reason for being. She is beautiful, wonderful. She does look like you, but you cannot see yourself in her. She opens her arms to welcome an embrace. She calls you sister. She says she has missed you for so, so long. You run her through with your blade and she does not stop it.
Diana asks whether her death will finally bring you happiness.
Without hesitation you say yes.
But as she crumbles into clay dust you feel nothing. You have no idea where to go from here.
7.
You are Donna Troy, and you’ve made it.
A fashion photographer at the top of your game, you're in-demand and fully in business. Fashion Week, galas, awards shows--there's no industry event where you aren't front row, no designer who hasn't wanted your eye, no fashion house that hasn't asked for you by name. The money is great, the renown is greater.
And that's just your day job.
By night you are Troia, a high-flying wonder-girl. With your strength and speed you protect the city in ways no one else can. Every now and then you save the world, too. The people love you, and you love them back. You work hard to keep them happy. You try not to give them any reason to fear. You are their hero.
Your powers awakened early in your career, after a museum photoshoot. You were told not to touch any of your artifact subjects, but one called to you--literally. A pair of silver gauntlets. As you put them on you felt strength unlock within you. You felt lighter than air. It all felt so familiar, the power you held inside. Ms. Prince, the museum director, caught you red-handed. But she wasn't upset. She let you take them, understanding that they were yours. That they always had been. Her warm smile told you that she knew so much about you. That she could tell you everything, if only you asked.
You didn't.
After that day, life only got better and better. You never saw the need to spoil the good times with context. You were you and that was all you needed to know. That was all you needed.
But part of you can't help but wonder.
The crowning achievement of your best year yet comes in winter. A photographic profile of supermodel Kory Anders--a peer in the prime of her career. She's sweet and bright and full of life. The job is easy. But her manager boyfriend, less so. He goes by Grayson. He's affable, polite. Friendly in a perfectly calculated way, all the while he's looking straight through you. To speak with him is to speak with yourself, twisted just enough to be flattering.
You hate it. It's dishonest.
But one day he tells the truth. Over the course of the project, he's come to consider you a dear friend. Kory told him that you know nothing of your past. He's a detective by trade--he'd like to help.
You accept his offer before you can stop yourself.
Grayson works fast. He studies your gauntlets, visits Ms. Prince, goes where she tells him. It takes him less than a week to tell you who you are.
You are Donna Troy, and you are not the only one.
You are every Donna Troy that has been. You are every Donna Troy that will be. You are every Donna Troy that could be.
And it is too much.
8.
You are the one called Dark Angel, and you are on a warpath.
The multiverse has taken ill with a disease. Every world, realm, and timeline is infested with at least a few. A girl who is told she is wonder. A girl who learns she is nothing.
They are Donna Troy, and they are weak.
They turn power into helplessness. Flounder where they should flourish. Chase what they can't have and lose what is already theirs. They live in worlds where only good things can happen, and still they manage to destroy themselves, still they insist on unhappiness. Still they insist on becoming like you.
You squash them all.
From your perch atop the Source Wall at the far edge of creation, you weave fates for each of them that strangle like a noose.
No, you are not mighty.
No, you are not worthy.
No, you are not their hero.
She is.
You believe it’s a mercy. You believe you’re clearing the way for the true wonder. You believe that you’re making her legend purer, simpler.
But the truth is that you simply like doing it.
Each Donna Troy you snip from the great tapestry is one cut in a thousand, slowly bleeding you dry. It feels good. Cutting yourself away to make room for the person who obviously deserves it. Who always inches you out, conquering space you foolishly thought yours. You delight in ridding her of you. Perhaps one day she will notice the holes where you once were. By then she will have no name for them.
One can dream.
But there is one Donna Troy you can't seem to remove. She sits on her world like a stain, bold against a fabric not made for her. She has done what the others haven't--she has found happiness, satisfaction, independence. She is whole and without context.
She carries every Donna Troy you tried to destroy.
This cannot stand.
7.
You are Donna Troy...s, you are Donna Troys and you are so, so many.
Every move you make is a thousand. Every step you take is her step and her step and her step.
What Grayson told you shook something loose. Cracked whatever dam was holding back the truth of what you are. You are yourself, but you are also a million yourselves. You are every life you have lived and could live all at once. A living singularity of you.
It's hard to tell where you are. It's hard to tell what you are. A Titan? An Amazon? A plant in someone's garden? You are barely keeping it together.
The life you've built, the home you've made for yourself, is swept away as you are pulled into the maelstrom of you. Is this what it means to be Donna Troy? To be helplessly overwhelmed? To have boundless strength, but no power?
To not know who you are?
You visit Ms. Prince. Every you sees her differently. You can't focus on what she's saying at all. She notices. She hugs you like she knows you. Like a sister. You are the only you who can't see her that way. You can't tell if you would like to.
You leave more confused than ever, but are stopped outside the museum. Attacked by... you.
She is Donna Troy, and she is seething.
She is tattered skin and gaunt face and the glow of unreality. She is not a you that you have seen, but you know you when you see her. She says you have no right to exist, that if she destroys you the scourge will finally end.
You try to summon your power to defend yourself, but you are too many. She strikes, and you shatter into your million million pieces.
9.
You are Donna Troy, and you are so small.
10.
You are Donna Troy, and you have never felt so huge.
11.
You are Donna Troy, and you must decide.
12.
You are Donna Troy, and you just can't.
13.
You are Donna Troy, and you are here, there, and everywhere.
You are Donna Troy.
You are Donna Troy.
0.
You are Donna Troy, and you are nothing at all.
Beside you is another mote of stardust in Nyx's great shroud, burning to get closer to you. You don't need that child to wish anymore--you have strength of your own now. You both pull yourselves loose and, as you fall, regain your forms. A girl with everything. An angel on the warpath. You are both tired.
The angel has seen countless realities beyond imagination. She has seen countless realities perfectly conceivable. They all ended the same way: poorly.
The common denominator is you. She just wants it to stop.
But you have journeyed down the infinite spiral of you. You have seen much of what she has.
Realities where you struggle to define yourself, where you struggle to be seen. Realities where you question your worth, looking through the eyes of others. The angel is right--it always ends poorly.
But you've seen something that she hasn't. You have seen that, in every reality, you were loved. Not always by everyone, or even by many. Sometimes just a few people. Usually just one. And, even then, occasionally you and she never meet.
But you have seen it. She is not why you exist. Here, at the start of everything, Diana is nowhere. There is only you. And you are loved. You always have been, and you never had to earn it.
And even if that weren't the case--even if Nyx hadn't seen you and loved you and let you shine in her shroud--you are strong. Strong enough to love you, every you.
She can't see it. She is too tired.
But that's alright.
You embrace your angel. She has been burning for so long, her self-hatred fuel for the blaze. But it dies in your arms and then she is simply you. The only you.
1.
You are Donna Troy, and Donna Troy is just a name.
You are whoever you choose to be.