Chapter Text
Looking back, she longed for the peace that came with being a naive young girl who knew nothing about the world. Well, worlds. She was aware that her feelings were not entirely free of nostalgia, but when she compared the simplicity of those days, when her concerns were limited to food and household chores, with the complexity of her current situation, it was easy to see which was more manageable. The turning point in her life was losing her grandmother at the age of nineteen. Or to be more precise, it was the memory issues caused by the accident she had while trying to cope with the grief of losing her last remaining family member. While memory loss is typically associated with accidents that end with a head injury, the opposite had happened to her.
She had begun to remember her past life.
At least that's how she saw it, because it seemed the most logical explanation for those moments spent in a world so different from where she now lived, doing things she couldn't put into words. Reincarnation. Or Valerie could simply have been losing her mind, but she didn't much care to dwell on that thought.
The real madness on her part was to trust these newly acquired memories and leave the village in haste. She had never set foot in another city before, for that matter. Before selling all her small possessions and setting off for Denerim, she decided there was one more thing she had to do... Contact the right people and warn them in some way. Her first step was going to the small stone building that served as the village's only Chantry and telling a certain Chantry sister that she had received a vision from the Maker (lies), then handing her a letter. She had left the building in a hurry, passing through the praying crowd amidst Leliana's suspicious -but also curious- gaze. She knew her as a normal Chantry Sister until now, it was quite shocking to learn -remember?- what she was capable of.
The other step was giving a small basket to the eldest child of the Hawke family, telling him that she no longer needed those items for her journey. She pushed the basket, which also contained a short letter, into the hands of the young man and turned away. “This is the first time you spoke to me after like- five years, did you know that? And now you're leaving-!” Garrett called after Valerie like he wanted to say more, but she ignored him too because she wasn’t prepared to explain these things face to face. Being childhood friends wasn't sufficient reason to confess that you might have become a seer, sort of.
Besides, it was only natural that she didn't want to see them judging her—probably as a potential lunatic...or a demon.
Well, a few days ago while wandering around in a daze, grieving the loss of my last relative, I slipped and fell, hitting my head on the edge of our wooden table. Anyway, I'm fine now, but when I woke up, I learned about a whole bunch of possible scenarios for the next few decades of our continent. Almost all of them are quite horrible and contain demons! Can you believe it? And you- you must stay away from ogres, Garrett. Don't ask why it's relevant.
Of course, it sounded mad even to her. If she’d been an indifferent person, she herself wouldn't have believed these memories of unknown origin -why now?- but that was not the case; these strange scenes in her mind felt too real and lived to be denied. As for the ones about Thedas, she'd chosen to believe them as well, however indirect they may seem. Things add up rather correctly- and dangerously.
After fastening the leather bag securely around her waist, she threw her old cloak over her shoulders. She turned one last time to look at the small cottage where she’d lived for nearly twenty years, then strode confidently towards the West Road. She didn’t expect to see blacksmith Harritt at the village gates but she used this opportunity to casually mention leaving this small village for a larger city might be more profitable for his work. After all, anywhere would be better than here, yes?
"Is this why you're leaving?" he asked.
"Among other things."
“My condolences, lass, your grandmother was a good woman.”
She really was.
Valerie didn't think she was doing the wrong thing.. to leave Lothering behind, before it was completely destroyed and wiped off the map. She simply wasn't in a position to stop the Blight or prevent those tragedies. Standing in the town square and shouting everyone should leave their home wouldn't help, who would even believe her? Some of them might think she was possessed and she wasn't going to risk a possible capture.
The story of her departure from Lothering unfolded rather quickly. Two weeks after losing her grandmother, six months before the start of the Fifth Blight.
-What remains of the writing found in Nightingale's personal desk in Skyhold, clearly part of a longer parchment –now lost or destroyed-, some parts are incomprehensible:
Sister Leliana,
I know it's hard to believe, but if anyone understands me, it's you. Just as it's fate that you came to this small village as a Sister, it's also fate that I'm writing you this note – at least, that's what I want to believe. Lately, I've been having some very strange dreams, and although I want to dismiss them as just dreams, some of them felt like... visions maybe? I don't expect you to trust me, but I'll feel very guilty if I don't tell you anything. A disaster awaits Fereldan soon- ... that’s what I saw. Maybe it’s a false call on my part but- … some of them will be instrumental in preventing this disaster … in this village. I hope you'll notice them when they arrive. Just trust your instincts and- … protect you-
-A small note among the belongings of the Champion, hidden carefully by Varric in a secret safe at the Hawke Estate after the Chantry’s destruction. The edges are faded, but overall the note is in good condition:
Garrett,
I’m aware we don’t talk much, and I’ve never had any problem with you or your family. I’m sorry about your father. I know it was a long time ago and we were both quite young, but I don’t think I ever properly conveyed my condolences. I’m just... withdrawn, as you’ve surely noticed. There is one thing I hesitated to tell you before leaving the village. Don’t worry, I’m not confessing my love or anything. A few nights ago, I had a dream that felt far too real. Our village and the surrounding lands were under attack, and everyone was fleeing. Believe it or not, it was enough to make me leave my home.
In this dream, I saw you and your siblings facing some kind of monster. I don't remember it clearly, but I believe the creature specifically targeted your sister and... well. Perhaps it was just a nightmare, but please keep this in mind: if a giant creature attacks you in the future, protect your family first. There might also be dragons... anyway.
You will find four bracelets in the basket. You can probably guess what they are. Consider them farewell gifts. Take care of yourself.
(I know it was you who stole my favorite scarf when we were kids. I still miss it to this day.)
-Valerie