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L loved you.
Your hair, your eyes, your lips, your nose, your neck, your chest, your arms, your thighs, your legs, even your feet. He glorified every piece of your body. Insecure about your voice? He praised your voice; it was music to his ears. He would also be willing to try anything with you. Any kink, fetish, or position, he was up for it. He could never deny someone who looked like an angel to his eyes. He’d treat you like a goddess; you were superior to him. He was just the toy that you could play around with when you felt like it.
But the one thing he loved almost as much as you was your pussy.
Your sweet, sweet pussy.
The one thing L yearned for almost daily. He would absolutely worship it. Sometimes, after meetings, he would make you sit on his face and make you ride his tongue or rub it all over his face. When you were lying on the bed, he’d go in between your thighs and just lie there peacefully. When you were at work, he’d steal one of your panties and just lie with them or smell them while working. Maybe even jerk off to them. L would claim that your pussy was sweeter than any desserts and candies his taste buds ever laid touch upon. He loved it when you moaned while throwing your head back as he sucked on your clit and curled his fingers in your vagina. Every day, he would try something new to see which method gets him worked up best.
You love L
His lanky, thin frame means nothing to you; it just makes you love him more. His tired eyes speak to you, restless nights of solving the Kira case. Yeah, sure, some things tick you off, like how he chews loudly with his mouth open and how he sits. You can easily deal with his quirks, though; it isn’t unbearable. He was blunt, never initiating anything but rather being truthful and precise with his words.
Notice how he loved you.
Not how he loves you.
That case was all it took for him to ignore you every day. You can’t stand how he treats that case like his holy grail, his Roman Empire. That’s how you come home from work every day, from your job to find him on that computer, working his ass off and not even sleeping! You were used to him not sleeping, obviously, but it still caused you to be upset.
Then comes the stage of isolation. Not selective, but ultimate isolation.
It was going to happen one way or another. You felt deprived not only of touch but of love. L’s devotion to your body was drained out and poured into his work. It was as if you no longer mattered and turned into extra space in the house. The only time he got up was when he needed to shower, or he needed food, sweets to be exact. You felt ignored, unseen by him. You bet he can’t even remember the last time you guys kissed or made love!
But all of that was going to change now; just because he’s not making an effort doesn’t mean he gets away with it.
In the morning, you woke up to a busy L, typing away on his computer. You got up, this time without saying your daily “Good morning, my love.” Instead, you walked right past him and straight to the bathroom. You brushed your teeth and washed your face before hopping into the shower. L was still working, taking notes as he took a bite of strawberry shortcake. He didn’t even notice you didn’t say your daily good morning.
After you got out, you got dressed in comfy house clothes. You did not have to go to work today, which was good. It gave you more time to talk to your now so-called “boyfriend.” You walked to the kitchen, and on your way, L tapped your shoulder.
“What?” You scowled.
L wasn’t used to this behaviour and slightly jumped.
“Can you get me ice cream?”
You looked at him for a moment. How is he not noticing your behaviour? How is a detective not able to detect how his girlfriend is feeling? What the hell? After a moment, you just walked away from him, totally ignoring his request. Frustration filled your veins as you walked towards the kitchen to go make yourself a cup of coffee.
You opened the cabinet, and an array of mugs, cups, and sugar was displayed before you. But one particularly stood out, the mug L got you for your birthday. You remember that day so vividly.
See, L was very affectionate. Maybe not with his words, but with gift-giving and, well, eating you out! On your birthday, he bought you (f/sb) along with (f/f). You were so grateful for what he gave you. That was also one of the few times when he even said, “I love you y/n”.
The flashback you had made you shed a tear. What happened to your beautiful boy? The one who’d share his cake with you? Something so special to him, and you were the only person he gave some to. You wiped your tears and grabbed a different mug, unable to grab the one your boyfriend gave you.
After you finished making your coffee, you headed to your office and worked tirelessly while drinking coffee. Going through mail, responding to them, sending out forms, and talking to people became so exhausting. You sighed, contemplating your life decisions.
“Why’d I become a (d/j) ?”
“Why am I like this?”
“How did I end up here?”
“Why am I with L?”
You were now rubbing your temples, stressful thoughts marching into your mind one by one. You slowly shifted the problem onto yourself. Were you the one who was making L feel this way? Did he simply lose feelings, but didn’t tell you? You kept telling yourself to snap out of it and keep working, but you couldn’t.
You started crying silently with your head down, your sniffles and tiny gasps echoing throughout your office. You couldn’t even please your boyfriend; hell, it was like he couldn’t enjoy your presence! L Lawliet, the one who fell for you first? The one who called you on late nights as he worked? The one who would put a blanket over you when you fell asleep over at his place? Gosh, all these things he did for you out of love!
You felt a knock on the door and ignored it, still sobbing.
“W-what?”
“You forgot my cake.”
Oh no.
He saw you crying, and all he gave a fuck about was cake?
“L Lawliet, you have got to be kidding.” You hissed.
“Is something wrong?” He asked, cluelessly.
“Yes, do you forget that your girlfriend needs affection and how bad it hurts to see you work 24/7? To see her pray for you to hug her at least once? To get off that screen and maybe cuddle me? It’s like I’m just extra space! I know you have to work, I do too! But it wouldn’t hurt to feel at least words of affection from you!” You snapped.
His expression remained the same, but internally, he felt something else. Was it guilt? Shame? He couldn’t find it in him, but he looked at you with those same, wide, tired eyes.
“I apologize if I’ve made you feel unvalued.”
Yeah, because that is totally going to make you feel all jolly and joyful again. You just wiped a tear and nodded.
“Look at me, y/n,” he commands softly. “I am not good at showing words of affection. You know this,” he stated.
“It’s not that! I just want to hear you again! Feel you, see you, taste you! God, I mean, when was the last time we kissed?”
His eyes widen at your outburst, and he processes your words. He runs a hand through his hair, clearly uncomfortable, but understanding the depth of your frustration.
“I…I don’t remember,” he reluctantly admits. “It’s been so long.”
“Exactly, whatever, keep working,” you mutter.
Before you could even sit back down, he grabbed your wrist, gently but firmly. His hand moves to frame your face before closing the distance between you two. You kissed back for a moment before pushing him off.
“Stop,” he whispered against your lips. “Please y/n”
“You stop! Stop fucking typing and writing and—ugh!” You groaned.
He became agitated at your words and understood your frustration. He took a deep breath before speaking softly.
“You are mad,” he said, not as a question, but as an observation.
It took everything in you not to slap the absolute shit out of this man. I mean, why else would I be yelling, crying, and arguing?
“No, really?” you snarled.
His expression darkens slightly, he crosses his arms, and crouches on a nearby chair beside you.
“I work all day to provide for us,” he says quietly, his voice carrying a hint of anger now, too. “Is that so wrong?”
“No, I am literally the number one (d/j) worldwide, and you are the number one detective worldwide! We are filthy rich, L. I ask for two things: love and communication. If you can’t give me that, then what can you give me?”
His jaw clenched at your words. He knows you're right, but he doesn’t want to hear it aloud.
“You’re asking for too much.”
“At least I can communicate.”
You got him there.
His eyes flashed with anger, unable to admit defeat. He sighed and, for the first time, was at a loss for words. You stared at him, your eyebrows raised with your arms crossed.
“L, did you forget how a relationship works? You’re supposed to care! Give affection! Show some fucking devotion to me! I care for you, and it hurts to see you not only on your computer, working all day, but you don't even care back!” You shouted, tears brimming in your eyes.
His eyes slightly widen at your emotional outburst, watching with guilt and shame. He sees the tears pooling in your eyes, and it hits him like a punch in the gut. He takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself.
“You expect too much out of me,” he whispers, his voice cracking.
You look at him for a moment before bursting into tears and walking out of the room, simply giving up. He stood there; the sight of you crying made his heart break. He feels like an asshole–a cold-hearted, unfeeling ass hole. He followed you out and tried to explain, but you shut the door on him.
You walked to the guest room, sobbing and mumbling degrading words to yourself. L crouched by the door, listening to your muffled sobs and harsh words. His heart aches at the sounds, realising that his coldness has driven you to self-loathing, the last thing he wanted you to feel. He felt utterly helpless.
“Stop crying,” L spoke.
“L, you make me loathe myself every day because I feel like the worst girlfriend, don’t tell me to stop,” You sobbed.
He takes a deep breath, knowing he needs to choose his words carefully. If something comes out the wrong way, your relationship could be over. He decided to knock on your door and ask.
“Please, open the door, let's talk about this like adults,” he pauses before adding softly,
“I care about you more than you know.”
You stopped for a second. It was hard to believe that L could be so empathetic, but you were still upset.
“If you cared about me more than I know, then how come you choose work over me?”
He stays silent for a moment, realizing the truth in your words. He runs a hand through his hair before responding softly through he door.
“Because…because it’s easier. Work is predictable, it’s safe. You’re complicated. I never know what to do with you sometimes, y/n,” He admits, his voice laced with vulnerability.
You stay silent, wondering what could have possibly gone through his mind when he was saying that.
“L, get the fuck out and think about what you’ve said, and don’t talk to me.
He was frozen, your words hitting him like a physical blow. He expected anger, tears, anything but this cold dismissal. Without another word, he turns and walks away from the door, his heart heavy with regret and unspoken feelings.
As the hours tick by, L notices the gravity of his actions, your words echoing throughout his mind. He stands up abruptly from his desk, deciding that enough time has passed between toy and him. He walks back to the guest room and knocks softly.
“Open the door.”
You were still getting over the argument, but you managed to pull yourself together. You told him to give you a minute so you could get yourself together. You weren’t as much of a mess as you were before, but your eyes were still red and swollen. You went to the bathroom and splashed cold water onto your face. The refreshment of the water felt so much better. It restored you a little and made you breathe more steadily.
You open the door to see your tall, lean boyfriend standing before you. Apologizing is foreign to him, showing emotions even more so. But looking at your hurt face makes something inside him crack.
“I’m not good at this relationship stuff,” he admits gruffly.
You look up at him, your emotions too many. Joy, anger, nervousness, love, it’s all too much to take in.
“L, you don’t have to be good. Let me teach you,” you assured him.
And for the first time, you saw your boyfriend, L Lawliet, shed a tear.
You walked up to him and kissed him passionately and sincerely. He gracefully kissed back and wrapped his arms around your neck. You kissed along his jawline, marking him as your own. You moved down to his lower neck and left more love bites and licks. He huffed and ran his fingers through your hair, playing with it naturally. You looked up at him, no longer longing for attention but rather with reminiscence. God, you missed looking at him like this.
“I’m not taking you in your office.”
“Wait–what?”
“Get in bed, y/n,” He demanded
You froze for a moment before walking over to your shared bedroom. Lying on the bed, you watched as L walked in, tension filling the room immediately. He looked at you, ever so dull, but yet you could tell desire fueled behind it all.
“Don’t lie down.” He ordered.
“Then what do you want me to do, hm?”
“Sit on my face, better yet, ride.”
You blush but sit up, scooching aside to make room for your boyfriend to lie down on the bed. He took off your pants and your underwear.
“I missed your taste, candy and cake weren’t cutting it for me.” He sighed.
You smiled and hovered over his face, but you hadn’t done it in so long, you were afraid of crushing him.
“L, I don’t want to crush you.” You shivered.
“Y/n, if you crushed me to the point I’d die, I’d be so happy. Dying by suffocation of my girlfriend’s thighs sounds amazing.”
You smiled and reluctantly sat halfway, but that wasn’t cutting it for L. He pulled you down and put his tongue to work. He licked all of your inner walls, making sure his tongue marked every single inch of your wetness. He worked his way up to then suck on your clit while alternating between that and swirling his tongue. You whimpered and let out tiny gasps, grabbing onto the headboard tightly.
“Fuck, L…” You moaned.
Hearing your moans only drove him more wild. He stopped for one second to look up at you.
“Ride it. Ride my tongue, please.” L said in a small whimper.
You soon followed, grinding yourself across his tongue. L groaned happily, moving his tongue along with your pace. You missed this, you and he did. All of the bliss and memories slowly flooded back into your head of him eating you out. It felt so good before as it did now. This session was different, very different. This wasn’t about two minutes of pleasure, then moving on. This was about reconnection, feeling interlinked with each other again.
You looked down at him with adoration and hunger. He looked so submissive while he ate you out; it was his pride and joy. You smiled as you slowly felt your orgasm rising up.
“L…I’m so fucking close..” You whined.
He doubled his efforts, trying to meet your needs. You arch your back and cry out as you come undone right onto his mouth. He eagerly lapped up your juices, slightly moaning at the taste of your release. You remember him describing it as sweet, like freshly picked strawberries.
“Taste so…fucking good.” He groaned out.
You panted heavily as you slowly got off and onto his lap, looking up at him with love.
“Missionary.”
“But you just ate me ou-”
“Missionary, now.”
He pinned you to the bed and wrapped your legs around his waist, lining himself up with your slightly swollen pussy.
“Ready?” He asked.
You nodded, tracing your finger down his body.
“Words, y/n.”
“Yes, L fill me…”
He slowly pushed himself into you, letting out a guttural moan as he felt his cock being wrapped around your warm, tight, wet core. You gasped, admiring the feeling of being filled. You wanted to enjoy this moment, this sensation of the connection. He slowly started thrusting in and out of you as well as playing with your nipples. He loved stimulating you so much; he loved being the one to make you cum. You moaned at the sight and feeling; it felt as if it was too good to be true.
“L your cock is so big…” You whimpered.
He smirked and took it as a sign to go faster. You were so tight, but he still wanted to make sure you were okay. He let out low grunts and groans while you let out moans and tiny gasps. It felt so good getting filled by him, like a dream come true. He grabbed your legs and threw them around his shoulders, allowing him to thrust at a deeper angle.
“This pussy is so damn good…”
“Gonna finish inside this pretty little thing..”
All his chants were going through your mind. You felt a tightening knot forming in your stomach, and your thighs were starting to shake. You started clenching around him and grabbing onto his hair.
“I’m gonna cum…L–fuck!”
You clenched hard around his cock, your cum coating his cock fully. He moaned loudly before shooting his load into you; it’s like he couldn’t stop. He buried his face in the crook of your neck as he came deeply, filling you to the brim. You both panted heavily, and he lifted his head to make eye contact with you.
“I’m sorry, y/n.”
“It’s okay, L. You got carried away.”
“No, it’s not, I missed out not only on this but your love and care.”
“It’s okay, we are together now.”
He smiled at you, fully content and at peace under the sheets with you.
He still loved you.