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Danny groaned loudly as he leaned back against Starscream’s arm, which was holding up the datapad the seeker was reading. Danny slid slowly down as he clamped his hands over his ears, trying to tune out the absolutely horrible, grating noise coming from outside their room.
Danny thumped the back of his head against Starscream’s plating repeatedly as if the thuds would drown out the music. But in between every impact, he could still hear it.
‘Jingle bell’
Thud.
‘Jingle bell’
Thud.
‘Jingle bell rock.’
Thud, thud, thud.
WHY did it have to be this time of year? He had hoped that moving in with a bunch of giant alien robots meant he would never have to experience this accursed holiday ever again.
But nooooo.
The Autobots' human partners had to love Christmas.
Danny went to thud his head back again, only for Starscream to pull his arm away, causing Danny’s back to hit the desk instead with a whumph, and the half ghost was left staring up at Starscream, who looked down at him with a raised optic ridge. The datapad was already powered off.
“I assume that striking your cranial unit against Cybertronian metal that many times is sure to cause some degree of damage,” Starscream said simply.
“Anything to drown out that awful noise,” Danny groaned, lifting his arms before letting them drop back to his sides in exasperation.
Starscream glanced around the room. “What noise? I can barely hear anything.”
“You don’t have enhanced hearing,” Danny grumbled. “The kids are playing Christmas music upstairs,” he elaborated, shoving as much venom as possible into the word ‘Christmas’, as if it physically pained him to say it.
“What is Christmas?” Starscream rolled his optics like he was already done with what Danny was complaining about.
Danny sighed, pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Only the worst holiday on the face of this planet.”
Starscream glanced up towards the ceiling. “So why are the Autobots celebrating it, then?”
Danny crossed his arms over his chest and sat up. “Because, unfortunately, even though it's the worst, everyone else still seems to enjoy it.”
“So it is a matter of opinion, then?”
“Yes,” Danny said, almost with a pout. “It is. The holiday still sucks, though.”
“Very well, I’ll take your word for it.” Starscream gave a quiet, amused huff, pulling the datapad back in front of him. He then paused.“Would you prefer I play some music from Cybertron?”
Danny immediately sat up straighter, staring at him with stars in his eyes.
“Please,” he said fervently. “Anything is better than this.”
-
The next horrific event occurred when Danny finally worked up the courage to go upstairs and actually do something.
Resigned to his fate, he made his way along the catwalk with his hands shoved deep into his pockets, looking decidedly unimpressed with the world as he headed toward the medbay to talk to Ratchet. He passed by the kids’ little alcove on the way, where all three of them were sprawled on the couch watching a movie, with Bumblebee standing behind them, optics fixed on the screen as well.
Danny grimaced as his gaze caught on the large, twenty-something-foot-tall Christmas tree standing proudly in the corner. It was fully decorated and looked to be secured in place with what Danny assumed was a piece of metal plating welded to the wall. It was also very much a real tree. He guessed the kids had gone through the ground bridge and convinced the Autobots to grab one for them out of an alpine forest or something.
Danny shook his head at the waste of a perfectly good tree. He had been hidden in his room for the last few days ruminating on the holiday, so he had luckily missed being asked to help with any decorating.
He was almost home free when Miko called out to him. “Hey, Danny! You wanna join us?”
Danny paused mid-step.
He glanced back at the screen just long enough to recognize the movie playing.
Elf.
His frown deepened immediately as he turned away and continued on his path. “Absolutely not.”
“Woah, woah, woah!” Miko jumped up and ran over, completely abandoning the movie. “What’s got you all in a grinchy mood?” She poked him in the side.
Danny dragged a hand down his face with a groan. “Christmas is the absolute worst time of year in existence, and I hate it with every fibre of my being.”
He looked up to see the shocked, open-mouthed expressions of all three kids staring at him. The hangar went quiet for a beat before Miko snapped out of it.
“WHAT!?” Miko exclaimed. Danny winced at the volume.
“How? You hate it? In what universe?!” She floundered for words, an almost non-existent occurrence for the teenage girl.
Jack paused the movie and set the remote aside. “You hate Christmas?” he asked, incredulous.
Raf looked up at Danny with wide eyes. “Why?”
Danny glanced away from Raf’s face, unsure he could take looking at his concern any longer. “I just do, alright? It’s a sucky, useless holiday.”
“But I don’t get it,” Miko said, waving her arms around dramatically. “How can anyone hate Christmas? You get to hang out with friends and family and get free gifts and—and—and... cookies!”
Danny groaned, rubbing at his temples. “My Christmases consisted of killer resurrected turkeys, child abandonment, and my parents fighting over whether Santa was real, fake, or a ghost that should be melted down for ectoplasm. I can’t take it!”
The kids stared at him for a moment longer. Then Miko bounced back, undeterred, throwing an arm around his shoulders — a bit of a stretch, but she managed it. “So you had a couple—”
“—All,” Danny interrupted flatly.
“All bad Christmases,” Miko corrected. “But that doesn’t mean any future ones will be bad!”
“Oh, believe me,” Danny said dryly, slipping out from under her arm and crossing his arms across his chest. “Christmas finds a way to make my afterlife a non-living hell every single year without fail.”
He waved them off. “You guys have fun. I’m going to find Ratchet, who I’m sure has a much more rational sense of taste.”
And with that, he walked away.
-
June had just stepped out of the clinic after her shift and slid into her car when her phone rang. She glanced at the caller ID and saw Jack’s name. Her posture immediately straightened — random calls in the middle of the day were rarely good news.
She answered quickly. “Jack? Is everything okay?”
“No! Everything is NOT Okay!” Miko’s voice answered loudly on the other side of the phone.
June sat up even straighter. “Miko?” she asked, startled. “What’s wrong? Why do you have Jack’s phone?”
“Because he wouldn’t give me your number and I had to steal it from him!” Miko said without shame. “Did you know that Danny hates Christmas?!”
“What?” June said, genuinely puzzled.
“I know, right? It’s unbelievable!”
June shook her head, even though Miko couldn’t see it. “No, I meant ‘what’ as in: why is this an emergency?”
“We need you to grab some stuff from the store and meet us at the Autobot base, stat!” Miko barreled on. “We’ll need glue, and a turkey, OH! And also—” There was some rustling on the other end of the call, followed by muffled protests.
“Hey! Give it back—”
“It’s my phone!”
“Yeah, but I grabbed it!”
June smiled as Jack finally let out an exasperated sigh into the receiver. “Sorry, Mom. Miko’s got it stuck in her head that we need to throw Danny the Best Surprise Christmas Party Ever, so he’ll stop hating the holiday. I’m… not sure how he’s going to feel about that, considering his reaction earlier.”
June tilted her head thoughtfully. “Well, that’s very kind of you all, trying to include him.”
“SEE?” Miko shouted triumphantly from somewhere nearby. “Told you she’d be on board!”
“So what’s the plan now?” June asked, laughing softly.
Jack sighed again. “We were wondering if you could grab some supplies for us…”
June glanced at her watch. It had been a long shift, but this felt worth it. “Alright,” she said. “I’ll bring hot chocolate. What do you need again?”
More rustling followed.
“Miko! Ow—”
“—Just give it to me!”
“—Hold on a second. MIKO!”
“Hello, Ms. Darby!” Miko chirped cheerfully, clearly victorious. “Okay, so we’ll need glue, fabric, a turkey, and a lot of glitter. Like… so much glitter. And—”
June started jotting everything down as she pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the store.
Once there, she pulled out Bill’s card he gave her for Autobot expense related purchases. She supposed this counted, didn’t it?
-
Danny was perched on Bumblebee’s shoulder as they made their way back toward the base, his legs dangling as he talked with the Autobot scout.
“I’m just glad I don’t have to keep hearing about all this Christmas nonsense,” he sighed. “After tomorrow, it will be all gone, and it can (go back to hell where it belongs). If I never hear another jingle bell again, it’ll be too soon.”
Bumblebee huffed softly, :: I mean the holiday does seem to be a bit… excessive, but the kids like it ::
“Excessive is an understatement,” He groaned. “But I guess they don’t have a reason to hate it like I do. I just can’t wait to go back to my room and hide away until Christmas is over and done with—"
“SURPRISE!” Multiple voices shouted in unison. Danny jolted at the sound, almost falling off of Bee’s shoulder as confetti canons went off and he was surrounded by a flurry of red and green pieces of paper that seemed to stick to his clothing like their non-existent lives depended on it
By the time Danny got his bearings again, his gaze immediately caught on the horrifying sight of even more decorations than before in the base than before. Glitter sparkled in on homemade lanterns. Streamers had been strung along the railings. Someone had even added even more ornaments to the already offensive Christmas tree.
Danny looked at the decorations then over to Bumblebee, who was looking very sheepish.
“Were you in on this?” Danny demanded.
Bumblebee looked away. :: I couldn’t say no to them! :: He gestured to the kids, who were all wearing Christmas sweaters of some kind.
Danny narrowed his eyes. “Traitor.”
He jumped off the mech’s shoulder and started walking away.
“Wait, wait!” Miko ran in front of him to stop him. “Don’t leave yet! At least give it a chance.”
“I would rather drink dark energon,” Danny replied without missing a beat, already shifting his weight like he was preparing to bolt.
Jack stepped in quickly. “We have hot chocolate,” he suggested cautiously, gesturing to June, who was holding a steaming mug. “And turkey.” He added.
Miko crossed her arms, “We had to get pre-cooked because we realized we couldn’t bake a whole one in time for the party, and Ratchet wouldn’t let us use his tools (welder) to ‘play around with human food.’” She grumbled at the last bit.
She rocked back and forth on her heels. “I promise it won’t resurrect,” she added.
June tilted her head at that. “…Should I be concerned that that needed to be specified?”
Danny pinched the bridge of his nose, a headache already beginning to form. “No,” he said firmly. “I am not doing this.”
Raf hesitated, then stepped closer, looking up at him. “Are you sure?” he asked quietly.
Danny paused. He dropped his hand from his face and looked down at Raf, at the hopeful —and admittedly very polite— expression on his face. He sighed, long and defeated.
“…Five minutes,” Danny said at last. “That’s it. Five minutes.”
The kids lit up instantly.
“Yes!” Miko pumped her fist.
Before Danny could rethink his life choices, music started up again, mercifully quieter than before, but still unmistakably festive. Danny grimaced as he walked toward the small table that had been set up near the couch, which, for some reason, had glitter and hotglue all over it now.
What did he get himself into?
-
Starscream emerged from his room to talk with Ratchet about his new schematics for advancements on the energon distiller, only to pause when he walked in the doorway. Danny was standing in a very upset manner near the ‘Christmas’ decorations and the human children who seemed to be having a party of some sort.
His gaze fell on Bumblebee, who was on the far side of the hangar watching the ordeal with amusement in his field. “What is he doing up here? I thought he was patrolling with you.” The seeker asked.
Bumblebee leaned closer, a quiet chuckle rumbling through his frame. :: The kids trapped him at their surprise Christmas party. ::
“…And you were privy to their schemes?” He raised an optic ridge at the Autobot scout.
Bumblebee shrugged, unapologetic. :: I was. ::
Starscream huffed, but still stayed to watch for a moment longer. Danny’s immense displeasure over this simple holiday was quite amusing. He might have to hang it over his head later.
-
June watched with a soft smile as the kids tried —and mostly failed— to include Danny in some sort of Christmas-themed card game. Danny was still clearly in a dour mood, though he was at least participating. That was some progress at least. However, June did have something she wanted to address.
She wandered closer and lingered for a moment before gently tapping him on the shoulder. “Hey, Danny? A word?”
Danny glanced up, then nodded and pushed himself to his feet. He passed his cards to Miko as he stood. “Here. You play for me for the next few rounds.”
Miko squinted at the cards, then called after him, “Make sure you come back! I still need to kick your butt at Mario Kart after this!”
“Thank the Ancients,” Danny muttered as he walked away, “something that’s not Christmas-themed.”
June smiled at that. “You look like you’re having a slightly better time.”
“Every time I try to leave, I’m thwarted by their pitiful expressions,” Danny said, running a hand down his face. “It’s completely unfair.”
“You really don’t like Christmas, huh?” June asked. She reached over and picked up a fresh mug of hot chocolate, holding it out to him.
Danny accepted it with a nod and leaned back against the railing. “No. And no matter how hard I try to escape it, it always finds a way to bite me in the ass.” He sighed heavily.
“Why?” June asked gently. “If you don’t mind me asking. Miko mentioned something about… Santa?”
Danny rubbed at his temples. “Unfortunately, yes. Every year, it was nonstop fighting. Even after they agreed on whether Santa was real, it just turned into setting traps all over the house and terrorizing the neighbours.” He snorted quietly. “They never paid much attention to my sister or me. She normally ended up making dinner for us while they were distracted. And half the time, the food ended up attacking us by the end.”
June stared at him for a moment. “…I can see how that might make things difficult.”
“Tell me about it,” Danny said. “Even after I moved out, something terrible always happened. It’s like I’m cursed to have a horrible holiday every single year.”
“Well,” June said carefully, “nothing terrible has happened yet this Christmas, has it?”
Danny jerked a thumb in the direction of the kids. Jack was arguing with Miko over what was very likely an illegal move, while she loudly sang a Christmas song completely off-key and slapped more cards down, ignoring him entirely.
June chuckled. “Okay, fair. But that’s kind of the fun part. Getting to spend time with people you care about.” She nudged him lightly. “You’d probably be enjoying this a lot more if it wasn’t buried under glitter and tinsel.”
Danny hesitated, then nodded. “…I guess.”
“I don’t get much time with Jack,” June continued quietly. “Between work and everything else. So moments like this? They’re worth it.” She smiled. “Even with the decorations.” She gestured around them.
She rested a hand on Danny’s shoulder. “You may not have had good Christmases before, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have one now. How about we try to make this a good one? Break that curse, huh?”
She gently took the mug from his hands and set it aside. Danny opened his mouth to protest, then stopped when he noticed the kids approaching.
Miko was holding something suspiciously behind her back.
With a grin, she pulled it out of a folded sweater and shoved it into Danny’s hands. He raised an eyebrow and unfolded it cautiously.
“Oh, this one's a group effort from the kids.” June smiled.
The sweater was white, with black cuffs and collar, and black stars stitched down the sleeves. On the front was a hand-stitched design of the three kids and Danny together, ‘Merry’ and ‘Christmas’ sewn above and below them. Danny turned it around to see the back, where two wings (heavily resembling Starscream’s) were stitched.
Danny stared at it for a long moment, his face heating up as he turned it back around again.
They… made this. By hand.
He then shook his head and looked away from it in defiance. “Thanks, I hate it.”
June pinched the bridge of her nose in exasperation. “Danny…”
The kids’ faces fell… except for Miko, who looked more suspicious than upset.
“C’mon,” June urged. “At least try it on.”
“I refuse to wear a symbol of a holiday I despise.”
…
Not even twenty minutes later, Danny was curled into the couch between the kids, knees pulled up, the sweater tugged over his mouth as he wallowed dramatically. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer emanating from a speaker on the table.
“C’mon,” Jack said, holding the remote. “We can at least watch The Grinch. You have to like that one.”
“The ending ruins it,” Danny grumbled into the fabric.
“Then can we at least watch the first half?” Raf asked.
Danny glanced over to the young boy and sighed in defeat. “…Fine.”
He snuggled a little deeper into the sweater.
Miko leaned over the back of the couch, smirking. “Hate it, huh?”
“Shut up.” Danny muttered.
Miko just laughed and vaulted over the back of the couch, landing on top of the boys with reckless enthusiasm. “Let’s watch us a Christmas movie!”
From behind the couch, June smiled into her hot chocolate.
-
5 hours later:
Danny and Starscream sat in silence as Danny fiddled with the sleeves of his new sweater.
Starscream raised an optic ridge at the movement.
Danny noticed Starscream's look and deliberately turned away with a huff. “It’s comfortable, okay?”
Starscream rolled his optics. “…You continue to confuse me, human.”
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