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Dick was shivering, he had been waiting for Jason for a while now. The younger was late, and maybe he just decided that Dick wasn't worthy bothering for. If that was the reason then it would break Dick's heart. He had been waiting for that since they planned it. Jason accepting his invitation? A dream.
The snow was peacefully falling upon him, making the city look hearty. Dick shoved his hands in his pocket. He had forget his gloves at home and he couldn't feel his fingers anymore. Maybe he should go back and erase the fact that he just did two hours of road just to see someone that did not even show up.
He sighed, feeling his eyes get watery. It was stupid, he shouldn't cry. It's not like it was surprising, Jason despised him. The younger probably only accepted because it was late and they had talk a lot that night.
He sniffled, blaming it on the cold weather. His heart was tight as he turned around ready to leave.
His car was not that far, maybe he could stop to a shop and buy something for himself. All alone. Dick swallowed thickly before hearing someone call him.
"Hey, Dickhead don't even dare thinking I ran off. Got busy at work."
Dick quickly wiped his tears as he turn around. His chest now warm with joy. He smiled "I'm freezing here."
Jason quickly joined his side, adjusting Dick's scarf on his face. "You look like you gonna turn into ice, cover yourself more."
Dick felt the blush creep into his face. Fuck not now stupid feelings. "Aw are you worried for me Little wing?"
"Nah, you're just a whining bitch when you are sick."
Dick raised an offended brow. "I am amazingly kind when sick."
"Ugh please I feel like I'm gonna die. I feel too hot, my head hurt. Bring me water, I'm thirsty." Jason teased, stupidly trying to imitate Dick.
"Eh I don't sound like that."
"Sure Goldie."
Dick glared before softening when Jason laughed. Dick wished he could make Jason smile more. They had lose so much time hating each other.
"Well are we planning to stay here or? I'm also freezing if you didn't notice."
Dick rolled his eyes and headed toward Jason's apartment. He could feel Jason's gaze on him as they walked toward the building. It had been so long since they only hang out just the two of them. Dick liked to have Jason's full attention, making sure that he was the only one the younger would look at. It was maybe selfish but he wanted it.
Once they were in the building, Jason placed a hand on Dick's shoulder, softly pushing him aside to unlock the door. Dick felt too aware of that touch, it was like his nerves were on fire. And when that hand disappeared Dick almost found himself reaching out for it.
As he entered, Dick noticed that the fireplace was light up. He had talked about that a few months ago around a family dinner, mentioning that it was his dream date but it wasn't for him probably, just a coincidence. Jason never showed any interest in dating and more importantly they were brothers.
Dick still decided to held into that idea, even if it was untrue.
"Don't break anything, don't touch my books and please don't get near my damn kitchen." Were Jason's first words once they entered.
And Dick knew it was supposed to be a joke to ease the tension, yet it hurt him. His chest squeezed at the words. It was stupid maybe, but was Jason really having no trust in him?
"I won't." Dick said maybe too sadly as something change in Jason's expression.
"It was a joke Goldie. Except for the kitchen." Jason corrected awkwardly.
Dick huffed, giving a smile to Jason. Even if deep down he felt like doing everything but smiling.
"Are you okay?" Jason asked after a few seconds of silence.
No. "Oh yea? Why?"
Jason just raised a brow.
"Jay I'm fine." Dick insisted as he took off his jacket. He wasn't fine but Jason could not know. It was suppose to be Christmas, not talk about your depression.
Jason took a step closer before shyly raising his hand and placing it in Dick's hair. He gave a few awkward pat. "You're doing great. Thank you for uh, passing time with me. I expected to be alone since I refused the family gathering."
Dick felt the heat creep to his cheeks. He looked away, staring at the fire. "It was nothing, didn't felt like doing it with everyone either."
Both men then stood there, embarrassed and unsure of what to do next. And thankfully Jason took the initiative as he walked back to arrange the couch in front of the fireplace. Dick just watched, confused as to what the younger was doing.
After five minutes of Jason moving around the whole apartment to bring various objects such as: Blankets, pillows, mugs and some plates with a few treats on it.
Jason then gestured for Dick to join. The older man was curious as to what was all this about.
As he move closer, Jason was patiently waiting for him to sat down and as soon as he was settled, the younger man joined him. He then wrapped a blankets around both of them, making as such that Dick could feel the warmth and every little shifts in Jason's body.
Dick really hoped that his hammering heart could not be heard or felt. Jason's skin was burning hot and the blanket was not helping Dick to cool down. He wanted nothing more but to lean into it, let his head rest upon Jason's shoulder. He even wanted the younger to stroke his hair once again. He actually just wanted Jason close, anything. He felt so cold and alone, he needed to feel someone against him.
"Here." Jason said, as he passed the hot cup to Dick. It was hot chocolate and fuck it tasted so good. Dick hummed contently as he drank it.
They stayed quiet for a while, staring at the fire in front of them, feeling it's heat as they sip into their drink like they had all the time in the world. Maybe they did this time.
"I-I know you said it was one of your dream thing to do. So, uhm I hope you like it." Jason shyly spoke, not daring to look at Dick.
Was Dick getting that wrong or did Jason meant that this was a date? Probably not, Jason was too naive. It was just some family bonding no?
"Yea, I thought about it as a date but can be nice with my family too."
"Oh yea. Family." And Jason sounded sad? Dick felt his heart fastened, what if Jason actually intended this as a date? What if Dick wasn't alone in his feelings?
They once again finished their drink in silence before Jason stood up abruptly. "I'll go put that in the sink... Yea."
Dick waited, feeling stupid. Had he messed up everything? Jason was clearly uncomfortable.
When the younger came back, Dick moved himself slightly to side, expecting Jason to now sit far away from him. But instead the younger sat at the exact same spot wrapping the blanket once again.
Dick did not know what to do, he could feel that Jason was looking at him. Probably expecting Dick to do the same. What if he was about to say that they shouldn't see each other anymore?
"Dick? Do you remember the first Christmas we did together when we were younger. You know when you finally accepted to pass it with Bruce and me."
Dick smiled at the memory, nodding as an answer. "You were so excited, you kept asking me stuff the whole evening, even Bruce was tired."
"I was. So much that I annoyed Bruce for like a week before you even came. He was just looking at me and his eyes were begging for some calm." Jason chuckled, a beautiful sound Dick printed in his mind.
He slightly glance at Jason, the younger man was looking near perfect with the fire slowly dancing across his face. Jason turned his face at the exact same moment and their eyes met. Dick quickly looked away.
"Bruce even asked me to keep you company the next day cause he was exhausted with your outburst of energy." Dick added with a small laugh.
"You know, that day when we just hang out all day. It's like the best day of my life."
Dick stared in front of him, surprised with the sudden confession. Him making someone's day that special?
Jason's ears were red with embarrassment. Dick wanted to kiss it away. Fuck, he was in love. Why was his heart beating so hard?
Jason shyly looked up, their gaze met. This time Dick did not look away, he could feel his body hot. They were so close, yet so far. If he moved his face a little closer, he is sure their face could touch.
And that's when his gaze fell upon Jason's lips. they looked so kissable, Dick wanted nothing more but see them red and swollen, because of him. Fuck, he should stop staring.
"Dick." Jason said, sounded way too out of breath and whiny.
Dick looked up and Jason's eyes were... Beautiful. There was so much emotions in them. The younger looked so wrecked, like it was taking everything in him to not just beg for Dick.
"Yea?" Dick replied, his eyes unable to pull away more than a few second from Jason's lips. The younger moved his face forward, pressing a peck to Dick's lips before pulling away, unsure.
Dick took a few quick breaths before diving right back in, Jason made a small noise in the back of his throat, noise that Dick would replay in his mind forever. His hand tangled into Jason's hair, pulling the younger closer.
Dick then deepened the kiss, he was drunk on the small noises Jason was making, everything around him narrowed to Jason. To the way he was puling against Dick's shirt, the way every time Dick would pull slightly back the younger was coming right back in.
"Dick..." Jason whispered when both of them needed air.
"I'm here."
Jason let himself fall forward onto Dick's arms, his face burying in the crook of Dick's neck. What had he done to deserve such a sweet boy? "Is everything alright Jay?"
The younger nodded. Wait, was Jason... Shy? Dick smiled to himself at that newly added information.
"Never thought this would happen." Jason muttered against him.
"The kiss?"
Jason backed off to look into Dick's eyes. "Everything. Having you on my sofa, kissing and actually having a good Christmas."
Dick softened as he placed his hand on the younger's face. "I love you Jay, I really do. I know you are probably not really into all this, you have your own things to manage but I can wait."
"No need to wait. Just Dick please. I tried to hate you, I really did but fuck, whenever I'm alone I'm always seeking for you. I-it's scary."
"Jay… I'm here. I'm sorry for everything I've done or said to you in the past. I know I have no right to ask for your forgiveness, but I really care for you, so much."
"I'm not mad Dick, not at you. You were young, I also was. We're messed up no?"
Dick gave a wet laugh. "We are yes."
"Dick would you please stay with me?"
Dick gave a soft smile. Of course he would stay. He had always want that since Jason came back. "Yes Jay, I want to. You're my precious Little wing."
"Don't call me that I'm taller than you." Jason scowled without any real threats behind his words.
"You will always be the small boy jumping around Bruce to me." Dick chuckled as he tap the tip of Jason's nose.
Jason groaned at the gesture before laying back down against Dick. "You're such an asshole but merry Christmas Dickie."
Dick felt his chest light up like fireworks. He smiled. "Merry Christmas Jay."