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After another successful day of bustin’ ghosts, the girls decided to head out to the bar for drinks. There was a place not far from the firehouse that they liked to go to, and the bartenders and waiters gave them discounts as thanks for their hard work. As soon as they walked into the bar, they made their way to their usual booth and ordered drinks. Patty and Abby were on one side of the booth while Erin and Holtz were on the other side. Erin was busy picking off small pieces of ectoplasm from her sleeve. Abby took off her glasses, fogged up the lenses, and wiped them on her sleeve and then placed them back on her face. Patty joked that she should take out her lenses like Kevin did with his.
“How do I always end up being the one with the most slime on them?” Erin asked, obviously irritated. Holtz leaned over to help her pick ectoplasm off her. “You guys pretty much left the place without a speck of this stuff on you.”
“It must be really attracted to you,” Holtz replied with a funny grin.
“Of course,” the physicist muttered under her breath.
“Look on the bright side,” Abby began. “Today we captured that ghost quicker than we’ve captured any other ghost. We’re really getting better at this!”
Patty nodded her head. “If only we could have gotten that proton machine gun to work. That thing is damn cool.”
Holtz sighed. “I don’t understand. It was working fine last night. I’ll have to make a few more adjustments to it, I guess.”
“Hey, speaking of the proton machine gun,” Abby interjected, “you told me I could have that! I remember you specifically telling me, ‘Hey, Abby, you can have the proton machine gun when it’s finished.’ Remember that?”
Patty shook her head. “Nu-uh, girl. You always get the cool stuff Holtzy makes!”
“Nope, that’s not true,” Abby protested. “She gives everything to Erin.”
The proton machine gun was too big for Abby, anyways. On the day that Holtzmann had her test it out, the the brunette almost threw herself to the ground while trying to lift it.
Their conversation was interrupted as the waitress returned with their drinks. Erin reached for her drink, but immediately was able to tell that this was not the right drink. How could they get it wrong? She was here pretty much every night and always ordered the same thing with the same waitress. At this point, the waitress didn’t even need to ask what they would be drinking. Erin picked up the glass and moved it in small circles to swish around the liquid. It was definitely whiskey. Erin could smell it. Whiskey was a little too strong for her. The smell was enough to almost make her gag. This seemed more like a Holtzmann or Patty drink. They liked the hard stuff. Her and Abby, however, usually went for something a little more… chill.
“Alright, Ghostbusters, enjoy!” the waitress said happily.
“Wait, hold on,” Erin spoke up. “This isn’t my drink.”
“Oh, that’s right,” the waitress said. “The woman over there sent that to you.”
Erin almost choked. “W-what? Someone sent me this?”
Erin and Holtzmann both leaned over to follow the waitress’ finger. There was a woman sitting alone at a table. She wore a tight white shirt with a black skirt. Half of her long brunette hair was pulled back in a low bun. She saw the table of ghostbusters looking over at her and Erin swore that she could see her blush a little before going back to her drink.
Erin internally began to panick. What was she supposed to do? No one ever had sent her a drink before. She didn’t know the right protocol for this. Was she supposed to drink it here and go over and thank her? Or maybe she was supposed to take the drink and go sit with the woman. Oh no, she couldn’t go sit with the woman. Erin was still in her ghostbusters jumpsuit and she was sure there was still more ectoplasm on her somewhere. Her hair was disheveled and she had opted for no makeup that day. Well, then again, Erin never really wore a whole lot of makeup anyways. But still. The last thing Erin wanted to do was make a fool of herself in front of the woman, because wow, the woman was cute and was confident enough to send a drink over, and Erin could already feel herself sweating nervously.
“C’mon, Sweaty Betty, go talk to her!” Abby encouraged with a playful smile.
“Am I really that sweaty already?”
“Wipe your hands before you go carrying your drink over there or it’ll slip right through ‘em,” Patty said.
Holtz didn’t say anything. Instead, the engineer twirled the toothpick around in her drink.
Erin took a deep breath and did as Patty said. “Okay, okay. Here I go. Just gonna… go talk to the cute girl who bought me a drink. Everything’s fine. Everything’s cool. I’m cool. I’m chill.” She stood up and inhaled deeply. Her heart was racing. Quickly, she turned to get back into the booth. “No, I can’t do this. I-I’ll make a fool of myself. Oh god, how can I be sweating this much?”
Abby stood up and grabbed Erin before she could get back into the booth. She turned the physicist around to face the table.
“Just go over there, weirdo,” Patty groaned.
“And don’t talk about your sweat,” Abby instructed her. “You’ll be fine.”
“Sweat right into her drink,” Holtzmann said, for some reason sounding a little too serious. “She’ll love that.”
Patty shook her head. “Holtz, don’t be nasty. C’mon.”
Erin shook her head at Holtzmann and breathed deeply again. Holtz watched as the redhead made her way over to the cute woman.
Maybe she should have bought Erin a drink to get her attention. All Holtz ever did was try to get the attention of the physicist. The fires and other odd accidents in the lab on a regular basis? She started those just so Erin would come running over to her rescue. And Abby definitely was right. Holtz did give Erin all of her new toys. When she told her to meet her outside to show her how to use it, it was just an excuse to spend more time with her. In the morning, she made a special cup of coffee for her. Holtz sometimes got the feeling that it was working - that maybe Erin finally was noticing her. Then, she’d overstep a boundary and then Erin would get all weird and rush out of the room. Holtz always ruined it.
Now the girl she had been crushing on for months was off talking to a girl much prettier and probably way more normal than she. It made her heart sink. It made her want to drink away the sadness. It really made her despise the woman.
It made her want to cry and Jillian Holtzmann hated crying.
“Damn, Erin is gonna be gettin’ it tonight,” Patty said with a smile. “Maybe that’ll help her lighten up a bit.”
Abby made an unsure face. “Or it could stress her out even more. I don’t think Erin has ever been in a relationship before. She always said her work had to come first, but I’m pretty sure that was just an excuse for being too nervous to talk to other people.”
“Well, Erin needs some love in her life. And that girl is cute. She better not mess this up.”
Holtz sighed. “Can we talk about something else, please?” she practically snapped. When she saw the looks Patty and Abby were giving her, she looked down. “Sorry.”
“What’s wrong, Holtzy?” Patty asked.
“Nothing,” Holtz replied, trying to hide the sadness in her voice. She looked over at Erin and the woman when she heard them both laughing. That should have been Holtzmann with Erin. She should have told her when she had the chance.
Abby, who also had turned to look at Erin and the woman, returned her gaze back to Holtz. “Oh, I know that look. That’s the look you get whenever you’re sad about a girl.”
Holtz furrowed her eyebrows together. “I don’t get a look when I’m sad about a girl.”
“Trust me, you do. Remember a couple years ago when that bartender laughed in your face when you asked her out? You had that same look you do now. You had that look for weeks.”
“Okay, cool, you didn’t need to remind me of that,” she mumbled.
“Who’s got’cha sad, Holtzy?” Patty asked gently.
Holtz raised her head a little, trying to pretend like she was okay. “How about another subject change?” The blonde reached into her drink and grabbed out the toothpick. She pulled the olive off of the toothpick with her teeth and chewed.
Loud laughter came from the mysterious woman and the toothpick that Holtz was twirling in her fingers snapped. Abby was too busy looking over at the table to notice. Patty, however, very much noticed.
“How ‘bout we go get some air, Holtzy?” Patty asked.
Holtz was about to open her mouth to say no, but soon Patty was getting up and grabbing Holtzmann’s wrist to drag her out of the bar. She said to Abby before they walked out, “We’ll be right back, Abs. Make sure Erin keeps her cool.”
Outside was cold and Holtz crossed her arms over her chest. She kicked a rock that was near her foot across the street and sighed. She didn’t want to talk about this. All she wanted to do was go back to her lab and focus on her new projects so that she could forget about how madly in love she was with Erin. Then again, how could she forget? Soon enough Erin would walk into the lab and Holtz would see her. She’d see her adorable, nerdy outfit and that soft red hair. She would hear that laugh of hers that was pretty much music to her ears. There wasn’t a way she could simply stop loving Erin Gilbert, was there?
“Okay, Holtzmann,” Patty said, completely serious. “What’s goin’ on with you?”
“Nothing’s going on,” she muttered, refusing to meet her eyes. “Everything’s fine. Everything’s cool. Everything… sucks.”
Patty moved closer to Holtz to place a hand on her shoulder. “We’re your family, Holtzmann. You can talk to me about anything. I wanna help.”
Holtz nodded her head. She moved to face Patty. It felt weird to talk about her feelings. She usually kept this kind of stuff bottled up. Having to say outloud that she liked Erin made her heart race, and Holtz usually never got this nervous.
“I… like Erin,” she finally said. “I… think I might be in love with her and I’ve, um, been trying to get her attention for months but then I always screw it up and scare her off and have to start all over and, um, now she’s talking with a cute woman who bought her a drink and I feel like punching something or setting something on fire because that should be me sitting alone at a table having drinks with Erin.”
Patty was silent for a moment as she took all that in. Holtzmann looked away and ran a hand through her curly hair. Did she just spill too much? Probably, but Holtz had a habit of speaking a lot and too quickly when talking about her feelings.
“Okay, okay,” Patty said, nodding her head. “Had a feelin’ something was going on when you started givin’ all your cool stuff to her. Also knew that half of those lab accidents couldn’t have been accidents. You really like her, don’t you, Holtzy?”
Holtzmann nodded her head slowly. “Now she’s in there talking to that woman and I’m out here getting all jealous and I hate it.” She kicked another rock. “What do I do?”
“Well, you could, y’know, tell her that you like her,” Patty suggested with a small laugh.
“Psh. She would just laugh at me.”
“And so what if she does? You gave it a shot! You were honest. Erin will appreciate your honesty, Holtz. Ya gotta tell her or she’ll never know.” She paused for a moment, thinking. “Remember how Abby said Erin’s never been in a relationship? She might know that you like her. Hell, maybe she even likes you back! She’s just scared. Real damn scared and just straight-up confessin’ to her might make her feel better about it all.”
Holtz considered that for a moment. Confess to Erin? How exactly was she supposed to do that? Erin was probably already head over heels for the mysterious woman. Holtzmann couldn’t help but imagine herself telling Erin that she was in love with her, only for the physicist to tell her that she was in love with someone else. She didn’t want to experience that type of heartbreak.
Yet, the engineer also couldn’t help but imagine a scenario where Erin exclaims, “I’ve been waiting for you to finally tell me!” and then kisses her.
So maybe Patty was right. Maybe she still had a chance with Erin Gilbert. Or maybe she didn’t, but the point was that Patty was right. She had to come clean and be honest. She needed to get this out in the air or it would surely kill her.
After a brief, tight hug from Patty, the two made their way back inside. Abby had ordered a basket of french fries and was munching on them and was finished with her drink. She waved to them when she saw them walking in. Holtzmann immediately looked to the table where Erin still sat with the woman. Both had finished their drinks and were still chatting away. She felt her heart tighten again and if she could go over there right then and there and swoop Erin off her feet and kiss her, she totally would, but she simply made her way back to the booth to join Abby and Patty.
“Everything okay?” Abby asked.
Holtz nodded her head and Patty looked back at the table.
“How’s it going over there?” Patty asked.
“Pretty well, surprisingly. I only saw her finger gun in her direction twice. Plus I think she stopped sweating finally.”
Holtz couldn’t help but sigh and Patty reached to pat her shoulder.
“It’s okay, baby,” she reassured. “You’ll get your chance to tell her.”
Abby looked confused for a moment and looked from Holtzmann to Erin and then to Patty. She mouthed, “Does Holtz like Erin?” and Patty nodded her head. Her expression went from confused to excited in an instant. Then that expression turned to anger. “Holtzmann, why the hell didn’t you tell me? I wouldn’t have egged her on to go talk to her if I had known.”
Patty smiled happily. “It’s okay. And you know why it’s okay? Because Holtzy is gonna tell her.”
Holtzmann slowly nodded her head. Yes, she was going to tell Erin. She was going to tell Erin that she was madly in love with her and that she couldn’t get her out of her mind. She was going to explain that, yes, most of the fires and accidents in the lab were just so Erin would come to the rescue. Holtz was going to tell her that she gave her all of her new creations just so she could spend more time with her. She was going to tell her that even though she made jokes about her fashion in the past, she actually really loved it and the fact that she always looked so adorable when she finally let loose and danced around the lab with her. Then she would tell her how awful she felt when Erin talked to the mysterious woman who bought her a drink and how much she hated feeling jealous and how she just wanted Erin to be hers. Holtzmann was going to tell her everything, even if it meant getting laughed at. At least it would be out there.
At least Erin Gilbert would know that Jillian Holtzmann was in love with her.