Chapter Text

Class gc

8 am

[Professor Monomoko]: Hello students.

[Professor Monomoko]: Welcome to “How to Make Friends 101”

[Professor Monomoko]: For this class, you do not need to enter an actual classroom. Instead, you will be texting in here. Everyone is required to contribute to an actual, interesting conversation every day after 8 am. Those who do not will receive a failing grade for the day.

[Professor Monomoko]: There is no midterm or final exam. Your grade each day will be added all together to cumulate your final grade for the end of the semester. Also, at any given time, I will insert a survey that everyone is required to participate in, and results will be shared with the class. Think of them as a test grade.

[Professor Monomoko]: Whether you end up making friends is all up to you. I will be monitoring this chat at certain intervals throughout the day. Please email me if you have any questions. Thank you.

8:05 am

“Yokoi Ruka” changed her name to “Ruka”

[Ruka]: Rise and shine everyoneeee!

[Akiba Taku]: No class? Yeahhh I’m going back to sleep

[Ruka]: hey come back! 

[Atsushi Tei]: hi?

[Atsushi Tei]: also Akiba pls respond to the videos i sent u

[Akiba Taku]: well i guess i’ll stay for Tei

[Akiba Taku]: sir yes sir!

“Atsushi Tei changed his name to “Tei”

“Akiba Taku” changed his name to “Atsushi’s bf”

[Tei]: Akiba change ur name

[Atsushi’s bf]: but but but! 🙁

“Atsushi’s bf” changed his name to “Akiba”

[Akiba]: u owe me a kiss 

[Tei]: I don’t owe u anything, i kiss u regardless ❤️

[Ruka]: guys!

[Ikeda Daiki]: I’m going to barf

[Akiba]: oh god hes one of those…

[Ikeda Daiki]: the hell do u mean by that

[Denden Misao]: I think he means homophobic! 🌈

[Ruka]: guys im pretty sure hes NOT homophobic…right?

[Ikeda Daiki]: im not homophobic

[Ruka]: phew!

[Ikeda Daiki]: i hate all couples regardless of gender

[Ruka]: Well thats! Ummm

[Ogura Noriko]: I HAVE RISEEEEEEEEEN!!!!(((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

[Ogura Noriko]: BASK IN THE GLORY OF THIS IMMORTAL BEING!!!(*^◯^*)

[Akiba]: sick, can i like, make a wish or something

[Ogura Noriko]: U FOOL! U NEED NOT TELL ME UR PRAYERS! I WILL LOOK INSIDE UR SOUL MYSELF!!!

[Ogura Noriko]: SCANNINGGGGG

[Ogura Noriko]: SCANNINGGGGGG

[Ogura Noriko]: I HAVE FOUND IT

[Ogura Noriko]: U WANT SOMEONE NAMED TEI TO KISS YOU

[Akiba]: holy shit howd u know

[Ogura Noriko]: my methods are beyond MORTAL understanding

[Ikeda Daiki]: oh thank fuck she stopped screaming

[Ikeda Daiki]: that shit was hurting my ears

[Tei]: but u cant even hear her…

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (geez u curse like a middle schooler)

[Ikeda Daiki]: oh i know u of all ppl arent talking

[Ikeda Daiki]: ur literally using a voice message

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (And????)

[Ikeda Daiki]: That’s like, for old ppl

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (says the middle schooler)

[Ruka]: guys! Could we maybe NOT fight in the gc?

[Ikeda Daiki]: who the hell died and made u boss

[Ruka]: I’m actually the TA for this class, so technically the assistant boss?

[Ruka]: which is still a boss

[Ruka]: so no funny business on my watch

[Maekawa Azusa]: get a load of dorkus over here 😭

[Shishikura Osamu]: M-maybe lets not call ppl…that

[Maekawa Azusa]: pshh ok braces

[Maekawa Azusa]: holy shit wait i gotta change my pfp, my school photo is ASS

“Maekawa Azusa” changed her name to “Maekawa”

“Maekawa” changed her pfp

[Maekawa]: phew, thats better

[Shishikura Osamu]: it rlly wasnt THAT bad before…

[Maekawa]: that was from like, 3 yrs ago

[Maekawa]: my makeup was so ass💔

[Ikeda Daiki]: it still is

[Maekawa]: uhh can we all vote to kick the “thing” back to whatever planet it came from

[Denden Misao]: aww but hes kinda cute!🌸

[Denden Misao]: Look at how chubby his cheeks are!!🥺🥺🥺

“Ikeda Daiki” changed his name to “Ikeda”

“Ikeda” changed his pfp

[Ruka]: hey! No pfp changes until everyone has gotten to know each ofher properly!

[Ikeda]: wtf, the purple bitch just changed hers

[Maekawa]: HELLO?!? PURPLE WHAT?!?

[Tei]: her face is still in there, yours is just blank

[Ruka]: What Tei said! Plsss change it back

[Ikeda]: and what if i dont

[Tei]: omfg just change it back

[Ikeda]: Fine

“Ikeda” changed his pfp

[Ikeda]: are u happy now?

[Ruka]: Lovely!

[Shishikura Osamu]: so when is everyone going to get here?

[Ruka]: no idea…

[Maekawa]: youd think they’d be on time. Class started 10 min ago

[Denden Misao]: well technically class is just texting🤔

[Maekawa]: well YEAH but like, nobody knew that until the professor told us herself 15 min ago

[Shishikura Osamu]: maybe they saw the message and went back to sleep?

[Akiba]: hah, thats what I was gonna do

[Tei]: yeah before i forced u awake

[Akiba]: ah details details

8:45 am

[Ninomiya Youhei]: im so [REDACTED] rn

[Ninomiya Youhei]: what the fuck who censored me

[Professor Monomoko]: That would be me.

[Professor Monomoko]: Any profanity and vulgar language that I deem to be inappropriate will be blocked.

[Ninomiya Youhei]: OH CMON! THAT REDHEAD JUST CALLED SOMEONE A [REDACTED]

[Ninomiya Youhei]: DUDE

[Professor Monomoko]: I was not there to see it, therefore, it never happened.

[Professor Monomoko]: Goodbye.

[Ninomiya Youhei]: [REDACTED]

[Ninomiya Youhei]: darn

[Maekawa]: well i mean thats one way to make an entrance

[Maekawa]: altho eyepatch girl rlly took the cake

[Maekawa]: actually ive been meaning to ask abt that, did they rlly let u wear an eyepatch for ur school photos?

[Ogura Noriko]: INDEED! NOBODY CAN REFUSE THE WILL OF A GODDESS!

[Denden Misao]: maybe she has a missing eyeball! 👀👀👀

[Ogura Noriko]: THE GREAT PATRON GOD OF WOMEN WAS BLESSED WITH 20/20 VISON!

[Shishikura Osamu]: so are u a god or a goddess???

[Akiba]: why cant she be both?

[Ogura Noriko]: ASTOUNDING ANSWER AKIBA, MY DEAREST SUBJECT! 

[Ogura Noriko]: YOUVE PROVEN URSELF TO BE A WORTHY FOLLOWER OF MY TEACHINGS

[Ogura Noriko]: CONSIDER URSELF TO BE MY NUMBER 1 DISCIPLE!

[Akiba]: holy shit i just got promoted!

[Maekawa]: if ur a divine being, can u like, summon everyone else here

[Ogura Noriko]: WELL YOULL BE PLEASED TO FIND OUT THAT IVE ALREADY DONE SO

[Ogura Noriko]: BEHOLD!

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: hey

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: srry guys, just woke up

[Ogura Noriko]: HUZZAH

[Maekawa]: that was one person

[Ogura Noriko]: ALAS, MY POWER HAS BEEN DRAINED. I MUST REST

[Kumada Erina]: so this is whats been blowing up my phone

[Kumada Erina]: a bunch of idiots

[Maekawa]: damn u got another one, not too shabby

[Ikeda]: i hope ur not lumping me in with them

[Kumada Erina]: tf? U especially

[Ikeda]: shut the hell up pigtails

[Kumada Erina]: geez, was that the best u could do😂

[Ikeda]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: I think we all know what he said 👀👀👀

[Maekawa]: aw crud, denden’s emojis are rubbing off on me

[Denden Misao]: glad i could be of service! 😁

[Ninomiya Youhei]: dude how does the professor censor it so fast

[Maekawa]: lemme test it out

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: [REDACTED]

[Maekawa]: I SPAMMED THAG AS FAST AS I COULD

[Yaitabashi Sou]: well it cant be an automatic thing, yknow since she didnt censor it before

[Ikeda]: oh so NOW u know how to type

[Yaitabashi Sou]: i can type just fine, voice messages are just much faster

[Ikeda]: it took u like 2 min to type that, how slow can u be

[Yaitabashi Sou]: …

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: is it like a dyslexia thing orrr

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: srry that came out bad

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (no its fine, i just have a hard time seeing the letters is all)

[Ikeda]: if ur blind then how can u see what im saying

[Kumada Erina]: text to speech is a thing dumbass

[Ninomoya Youhei]: oh thank fuck the censoring is gone

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (im not completely blind, i can read just fine as long as I make my text rlly big)

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: so like, cant u just wear glasses?

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (they dont rlly help all that much so its just a nuisance to buy them. I can manage just fine)

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: huh, u learn something new everyday

[Ikeda Daiki]: u didnt know blind ppl existed?

[Kumada Erina]: he just said hes not blind u dipshit

[Matthias De Clerq]: hello everyone!! （＾_＾）

[Maekawa]: FINALLY SOMEONE NEW

[Kumada Erina]: i just got here a few min ago

[Maekawa]: oh pls, u had ur 5 sec of fame

[Ogura Noriko]: HELLO NEW ARRIVAL! IT SEEMS MY GREAT POWERS ARE SO STRONG, THEYVE ATTRACTED A PUPIL FROM A FARAWAY LAND

[Matthias De Clerq]: wow! So this is how japanese ppl text each other!

[Ikeda]: do not lump us in with her

[Ruka]: based on ur name, u must be from somewhere in europe, correct?

[Matthias De Clerq]: ah yes! I am a foreign exchange student from Belgium

[Ninomiya Youhei]: whoah sick

[Ninomiya Youhei]: do u like, speak french or something 

[Matthias De Clerq]: Indeed! I am also fluent in a few other languages as well

[Ninomiya Youhei]: omg omg say something sexy in french

[Ninomiya Youhei]: voice message pls

[Matthias De Clerq]: alright! Altho im not sure I have the right voice for it

[Matthias De Clerq]: (Tu es vraiment un vilain garçon)

[Ninomiya Youhei]: omg ur voice is literally perfect

[Ninomiya Youhei]: what did u say

[Ruka]: OK! HOW ABOUT WE DONT DO THAT!

[Maekawa]: ugh ur no fun dorkus

[Ninomiya Youhei]: pssst, dm me

[Matthias De Clerq]: ok!

[Ikeda Daiki]: screenshotted and google translated it. 

[Kumada Erina]: nosy much?

[Ikeda]: 🖕

[Akiba]: ig im nosy too, damn maybe I should learn french now

[Tei]: pls dont

[Akiba]: oh youd love it

[Tei]: Taku

[Akiba]: ughhh ur no fun

[Maekawa]: dont steal my line himbo

[Akiba]: himbo?

[Tei]: shes calling u hot and dumb

[Maekawa]: whoah ur bf said it, not me

[Akiba]: hey! Im not dumb!

[Maekawa]: oh yeah? Whats ur major

[Akiba]: physical education

[Maekawa]: holy fuck im gonna cry

[Denden Misao]: hey! 😡Someones major does not make them dumb!😡 

[Denden Misao]: my brother says just getting accepted into college makes u very smart! 🧠

[Maekawa]: and whats ur major

[Denden Misao]: Interior design! 🎨 

[Maekawa]: yeah that explains alot

[Ikeda]: well why dont u share with the class what YOURS is

[Ikeda]: since u wanna be all high and mighty

[Maekawa]: Mechanical Engineering

[Maekawa]: how bout that, HUH

[Maekawa]: wannna share YOURS now??

[Ikeda]: no

[Maekawa]: Maekawa 1pt, dorkeda 0

[Ruka]: well a phys ed major does have some pretty hard classes. U have to know the basic foundations of the human body. 

[Akiba]: yeah, what she said!

[Ruka]: also lets save the sharing for after everyone gets here. 

[Maekawa]: @everyone, WAKE UR ASSES UP

[Isoda Mion]: uh, hi?

[Ouno Nanae]: hello guys!

[Hirose Shingo]: youve got to be kidding me

[Shishikura Osamu]: wow it actually worked!

[Maekawa]: well ofc it did snowball, im a genius

[Shishikura Osamu]: snowball?

[Maekawa]: yea, yknow cuz u got white hair

[Maekawa]: and then u got the scarf

[Maekawa]: so snowball

[Shishikura Osamu]: that’s…

[Shishikura Osamu]: well ill take it i guess!

[Ruka]: NOBODY MOVE A MUSCLE

[Akiba]: still in bed btw

[Ruka]: i mean…

[Ruka]: nobody leave the app

[Ruka]: now that everyones here, we have to do introductions

[Kumada Erina]: who died and made u the boss

[Ikeda]: we already went over this dumbass, shes the TA

[Ikeda]: try to keep up

[Ruka]: AND NO FIGHTING

[Ninomiya Youhei]: wait shes kind scary when shes mad

[Ruka]: thank u?

[Ruka]: anyway, let’s just start now

[Ruka]: pls just state ur name, what youd prefer us to call u, ur major, age, and any additional info u may wanna add.

[Ruka]: I’ll go first!

[Ruka]: my name is Yokoi Ruka,but u can just call me Ruka. I am an Education major, 21 years old, and I’m very excited to meet u all!

[Maekawa]: totally saw that major coming

[Ouno Nanae]: I’ll go next

[Ouno Nanae]: My name is Ouno Nanae, but Ouno is fine. I’m a 20 year old kinesiology major. Along with my other classes, I also have to take care of my daughter, so sorry if I’m not active all that much

“Ouno Nanae” changed her name to “Ouno”

[Maekawa]: holy shit, a daughter?!

[Maekawa]: did not see that coming

[Ruka]: aww how old is she?

[Ouno]: she just turned 4 a few weeks ago☺️

[Denden Misao]: omigod i love kids! ❤️

[Denden Misao]: I rlly hope we get to meet her sometime🙏

[Ouno]: we’ll see! 

[Ruka]: alright, now who’s going next

[Ninomiya Youhei]: dibs!

[Ninomiya Youhei]: uhh Ninomiya Youhei, duh, u can call me whatever u want rlly, but ig Youhei is fine. 19 yrs old, i do violin performance, and yeah! Also, if u know abt any good parties, hit me up. Its like, so boring here.

“Ninomiya Youhei” changed his name to “Youhei”

[Maekawa]: scene kid playing the violin? Huh, guess theres a first for everything

[Youhei]: oh pls, i dont play that classical bullshit

[Isoda Mion]: oh?

[Youhei]: well ig if i HAVE to

[Youhei]: but outside of class, i mostly do like, punk or rock

[Youhei]: im thinking of starting a band actually

[Isoda Mion]: well if u ever need a vocalist, im always here

[Youhei]: NO WAY

[Youhei]: RLLY?!

[Isoda Mion]: yeah

[Isoda Mion]: well ig i should introduce myself while im at it

[Isoda Mion]: Isoda Mion, call me wtv but Mion is fine. Im also 19 and do Vocal Performance. 

“Isoda Mion” changed their name to “Mion”

[Ruka]: idk if this is rude to ask, but are u a girl, or a boy?

[Maekawa]: wow ur right, I cant rlly tell

[Mion]: both

[Mion]: or neither

[Mion]: depends on how im feeling

[Mion]: like i said, call me whatever u want

[Youhei]: whoah thats so cool

[Youhei]: ur def joining my band

[Mion]: sweet

[Kumada Erina]: im going next

[Kumada Erina]: Kumada Erina, just Kumada is fine. 19 yrs old, I do Management. 

“Kumada Erina” changed her name to “Kumada”

[Ikeda]: management?

[Kumada]: got something to say?

[Kumada]: no?

[Kumada]: then dont talk unless ur gonna go next

[Ikeda]: then im going next 

[Ikeda]: Ikeda Daiki, 18 yrs old, I paint or whatever. 

[Kumada]: oh! So ur younger than me?

[Kumada]: didnt ur parents ever tell u to respect ur elders

[Ruka]: NO FIGHTING

[Ruka]: NEXT

[Nishiguchi Mustuko]: one, kumada pls ignore him for once

[Nishiguchi Mustuko]: two, ill go next

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: u can call me Mutsuko, Im 20 and a culinary science major, and ig a fun fact abt me is that im in charge of my family’s restaurant

[Nishiguchi Mutsuko]: so u guys should def come on by for a bite. Maybe ill throw in a discount

“Nishiguchi Mutsuko” changed her name to “Mutsuko”

[Yaitabashi Sou]: What kind of food

[Mutsuko]: Any if you want, but we do specialize in pizzas

[Mutsuko]: not to brag but, u havent lived till you’ve tried one

[Yaitabashi Sou]: that sounds delicious, I’ll be sure to stop by whenever I can

[Denden Misao]: Guys! Guys! Can I go! 😖

[Ruka]: ofc Denden!

[Denden Misao]: Alright!

[Denden Misao]: Hiiiiii, my name is Denden Misao, but u can call me Denden! I’m 20 and I do interior design 🖌️ I also rlly rlly RLLY love arts and crafts !

“Denden Misao changed her name to “Denden”

[Ruka]: interior design sounds rlly fun!

[Ruka]: Maybe I should be hiring you to decorate my room

[Ruka]: It’s pretty bland…

[Denden]: im always available to help someone in need <3 😁

[Matthias De Clerq]: Can I go next?

[Ruka]: Oh, yeah yeah ofc

[Matthias De Clerq]: Hello everyone! My name is Matthias De Clerq, a foreign exchange student from Belgium, but Matthias is fine. I’m 19 years old and majoring in creative writing. I hope to make many new friends and learn all about Japanese culture!

“Matthias De Clerq” changed his name to “Matthias”

[Akiba]: wow your japanese is like, rlly good

[Youhei]: well I’d hope so

[Youhei]: he’s been here for like a year

[Matthias]: No worries! I’ve been studying since before I moved here so that’s why. I tend to pick up languages very easily.

[Yaitabashi Sou]: I’ll go next

[Ikeda]: Hold onto ur horses ppl

[Ikeda]: This might take a while

[Mutsuko]: I’m not even going to bother

[Yaitabashi Sou]: (My name is Yaitabashi Sou. Most of my friends call me Yaita, but Sou is also fine with me. I’m 19 years old and a botany major. Many of you already know that I’m legally blind, so I hope you don’t mind the voice messages too much)

“Yaitabashi Sou” changed his name to “Sou”

[Mustuko]: Nah ur good

[Maekawa]: I CALL DIBS ON GOING NEXT

[Ikeda]: well damn, no one was going to steal it from it

[Maekawa]: Ignoring that…

[Maekawa]: Maekawa Azusa, 21 yrs old, mechanical engineering major. Just Maekawa is fine by me.

[Ikeda]: all that hype for that short introduction

[Maekawa]: Oh you want an introduction? Ok then

[Maekawa]: I’m Maekawa, a 21 yr old who, just in case you didn’t know basic math, is 3 YRS OLDER THAN U

[Maekawa]: fun fact! I like giving everyone nicknames, and urs is [REDACTED]

[Ruka]: Thank you professor…

[Ruka]: Moving on!

[Shishikura Osamu]: I’ll go…

[Shishikura Osamu]: Shishikura Osamu, Shishikura is fine. Um, I’m 19 and a psychology major. That’s about it rlly

“Shishikura Osamu” changed his name to “Shishikura”

[Maekawa]: yknow I never got to ask

[Maekawa]: but what’s up with the red scarf

[Shishikura]: I just get cold rlly easily is all…

[Shishikura]: I know it’s pretty weird, especially during the warmer months

[Maekawa]: Nah, it’s kinda cute

[Maekawa]: makes u not boring

[Shishikura]: Oh! Um, thx!

[Ogura Noriko]: HALT, AND ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF DEAR MORTALS

[Ogura Noriko]: I AM THE PATRON GOD OF THE SECOND DIMENSION’S BEAUTIFUL DEMOISSELLES!!! 

[Ogura Noriko]: But if that is too hard to remember, Ogura is sufficient enough.

[Ogura Noriko]: Upon trading my immortal soul to live amongst the humans, I’ve been trapped in an 18 yr olds body. When I’m not answering prayers and communicating with my home realm, I also happen to major in computer science.

“Ogura Noriko” changed her name to “Ogura”

[Matthias]: Wow! I did not know we were in the presence of a goddess

[Matthias]: It’s a pleasure to meet you miss Ogura

[Ogura]: Hah! I’ve managed to rope in another loyal disciple

[Ogura]: I GAZE INTO UR HEART TO FIND A PURE AND KIND SOUL

[Ogura]: MAY LOVE AND FORTUNE BE EVER PRESENT IN UR LIFE

[Akiba]: hey, where are my blessings?

[Ogura]: You have already found love, do not be selfish

[Tei]: aand theres my cue to start

[Tei]: Atsushi Tei, 21 years old, communications major. You guys can just call me Tei.

[Akiba]: But don’t call him Atsushi

[Akiba]: cuz that’s like, my thing

[Tei]: right…

[Mion]: so u guys are like, dating?

[Ikeda]: unfortunately

[Akiba]: that’s also my cue to start

[Akiba]: but yeah, Akiba Taku, just call me Akiba. 21 years old, phys ed major. My fun fact is that I have a hot bf

[Ikeda]: that’s not a very fun fact

[Maekawa]: don’t mind him guys, he’s like, everyonephobic

[Hirose Shingo]: Since I’m last I’ll just get this over with

[Hirose Shingo]: Hirose Shingo, but just Hirose is fine. I’m 19 years old and a health science major. 

[Denden]: whoah! Maybe we can get him to fix Sou’s blindness! 🧐

[Hirose]: Thats…not how that works

[Hirose]: You can’t rlly fix being legally blind. And I’m studying to be a surgeon, not an ophthalmologist

[Ikeda]: I fear that’s like, common sense

[Ruka]: HOW ABOUT WE JUST WRAP THIS UP! 🥰

[Ruka]: I don’t wanna drag this on any longer than it has to, since I know a lot of you guys might have other classes to get to.

[Ruka]: But, how about we set a designated time to come back?

[Ikeda]: I’ve already met my daily talking requirements, why would I do that

[Sou]: Unfortunately, he’s not wrong

[Ruka]: Well! Um…

[Ruka]: I guess it’ll be optional, but you’ll miss out on all sorts of fun things! 

[Ruka]: We could call and play games, maybe study together, or plan hangouts! 

[Shishikura]: That does sound like fun…

[Youhei]: yeah, i suppose i don’t have anything better to do

[Matthias]: I also love this idea!

[Maekawa]: Is everyone ok with 7:00 pm?

[Maekawa]: I doubt many of us have any evening classes, besides maybe the doctor

[Hirose]: Surprisingly, 7 works for me.

[Ruka]: Great! Then it’s settled

[Ruka]: I’ll prepare something fun for us to do at 7.

[Ruka]: In the meantime, you guys are free to go!

[Maekawa]: See ya suckers!

[Shishikura]: bye!

[Denden]: SEE U GUYS LATERRR :3

[Youhei]: peace out