Archive of Our Own ^beta

Podracersunite 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Be a Jedi Knight, they say. Raise a PADAWAN, they say!!! THanks Master, for all the lessons, but why could you not have taught me what to do when my Padawan keeps TRYING TO JOIN ILLEGAL POD RACES???? Vossssss This is karma. The will of the force, if you will. Also put the data pad down you're literally in the halls of healing because you're sick. 0bi-WanKenobi You just hate me AmIrightOrLeft Hey so, what the kriff??? Podracersunite The children yearn for the pod races #what a mood#my kids are the same #also why are jedi so funnny wtk are they on???? 292,083,389 notes

ParentOfMenaces 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi I am running a fever, sure, but my padawan just tried to clumb the walls of the temple and so I had to get up from my misery cocoon to tell him to come down because he didn't listen to literally ANYONE ELSE Vossssss Remember when you tried to start a revolution at his age?? 0bi-WanKenobi Don't you have anything better to do... CryingToSongs Every time these two come across my dahsboard I feel like I'm getting more insight on Jedi life than any PR video ever. ParentOfMenaces Parenthood is hard #parenthood#hang in there Kenobi! #relatable 982,028,230 notes

Jayson 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Day 4 of being sick, my padawan made me soup. This soup included eight different lethal to consumption ingredients. I had to drink it with a straight face as he watched me with earnest concern for my wellbeing. I spent the rest of the day puking my guts out. No one till him. Vossssss And I appreciate that you didn't make me drink it. 0bi-WanKenobi If he had offered it to you I'd have force fed it to you. You would not have escaped. My padawan is a blessing to the universe. Do not dare think your life is not a worthy sacrifice for his happiness. Vossssss This is why we don't hang out anymore. ZilloBeastForChancellor I want to know what the eight ingredients were. Jayson I want to know HOW a child got them... Hello??? #I mean sure every core street kid knows how to get stuff like that#but how does a temple kid??? #I respect the ingenuity 984,283,754 notes

IcarusTC 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Day 6, I woke up at midnight deliriously sick, made myself tea, I turn around and in the dark, staring at me from the kitchen doorway, stands my Padawan. Scaring the force out of me. Why are children one step away from being horror jumpscares? I spilled my tea. Vossssss You know, I think it's just your kid. 0bi-WanKenobi SHUT UP VOS HE DID NOTHING WRONG Vossssss Uhuh that's why I saw you doing laundry at midnight. 0bi-WanKenobi I know where you sleep. Zuoun Does anyone know if Vos lived? CryingToSongs Yeah he's fine, the comedy duo always do this. Vos has yet to get taken out. Vossssss Rude, I get PLENTY of dates! 0bi-WanKenobi Why are you like this... IcarusTC Shh everyone my favorite comedy duo is on. #Kenobi and Vos #mostrelatableduoever #It's like my daily newsfilmsi 339,293,298 notes

MandaYO 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Day 9, Anakin woke me up at dawn to tell me he wasn't feeling well, and then threw up on me. I was still sick, so it took me a full minute to process anything, my dear padawan decided this must mean I was scolding him silently and started sobbing his eyes out and apologizing. I took me an hour to reassure him it was fine. Shut up Vos. Vossssss I DIDN'T EVEN SAY ANYTHING 0bi-WanKenobi I could feel it coming. In the force, if you will. Vossssss You're just a hater. 0bi-WanKenobi One day you'll have your reckoning, and I will laugh. I will laugh. ThePassageOfTime Let me live off of spite like Obi Wan Kenobi seems to live like 0bi-WanKenobi I am a jedi so I technically don't live off of spite, but also. Yeah, thank you. Vossssss Nerd 0bi-WanKenobi Cease your senseless chatter. MandaYO Average struggles with having an ad. And having friends who are annoying. #Parenthood #Manda save us from the chaos our children make #Friendship 938,283,823 notes

Bant 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Day 11, Anakin and I are now in the magical pillow fort of the force, the thing that WILL cure us from this dastardly fever. No one tell him otherwise. He needs a nap. Preemptively, SHUT UP VOS! Vossssss Once again, I didn't even say anything. But I WAS going to offer more blankets and your favorite pillow. Too bad. Now I won't. 0bi-WanKenobi No wait, come back. Vossssss You took me for granted, repent. 0bi-WanKenobi I'll make you your favorite caf. Vossssss Ok. I'm on my way. Do not make me sick. 0bi-WanKenobi Quinlan showed up wearing a full on helmet with a respiration device. Vossssss Force forbid I don't want to catch your icky germs!!! 0bi-WanKenobi Coward. Vossssss I give you things, and still you must betray me like this. What a cruel friend you are. 0bi-WanKenobi Laugh quieter you're going to wake Anakin up!!!! Vossssss I'M TWO ROOMS OVER BECAUSE YOU WON'T LET ME INTO THE MAGICAL PILLOW FORT!!! 0bi-WanKenobi Your respiration helmet is LOUD! He's TRYING TO NAP! Bant Look at my two dumbass friends. 0bi-WanKenobi Bant tell Quinlan he's being a coward. Vossssss Bant tell Obi to let me into the pillow fort. Bant I'm not here to take sides I'm here to point and laugh at you both. 0bi-WanKenobi It's nap time I don't have to take this from any of you GOODBYE! Vossssss And that's supossed to be our negotiator. Bant My friends are idiots, guys. I love them, but Force, they're idiots. #Neither of them have slept for at least 42 hours #The Pillow Fort Of Magic was my suggestion #Idiot Friends 557,273,927 notes

Bant 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Day 13 of being sick, Anakin refuses to sleep anywhere but the pillow fort, I created a monster. (Bant. Revenge may not be the jedi way but watch your back.). He told me to tell the people on the internet he thinks they should know that pillow forts are actually magic and that the force likes them and you should all have one. Vossssss WHY WON'T HE LET ME IN THE PILLOW FORT THEN?? 0bi-WanKenobi You're not welcome to our magical pillow fort. Vossssss Am I at least invited to his birthday party? 0bi-WanKenobi You're on thin ice mister. Vossssss Oh my force you guys are so mean to me sometimes. 0bi-WanKenobi That's rough buddy. Vossssss Tell Anakin I won't take him to that pod race if I remain banned from the pillow fort. 0bi-WanKenobi HI QUIN YOU CAN GET INTO THE PILLOW FORT IGNORE OBI - ANAKIN (Transcribed by Obi-Wan, as the original message held too many spelling mistakes to be readable) Vossssss I WIN 0bi-WanKenobi If you say so, thanks for volunteering for babysitting duty. Vossssss Wait. Wait no. 0bi-WanKenobi Too late. SiriT Can you guys just message instead of doing this, I keep having to see your arguments while I'm trying to scroll for cat memes. 0bi-WanKenobi WOWWWWW! Vossssss SOMEONE doesn't appreciate our comedic genius, Obi, I think we should take our leave. 0bi-WanKenobi Yes, I think so too. SiriT Ok theater kids. Bant Siri I want cat memes too, please send. SiriT I'm on it my bestest friend ever who appreciates me and my cat memes ❤️ 0bi-WanKenobi That's mean. This is mean. This is bullying. Vossssss I never recieve cat memes. Why do our firends hate us Obi. We did nothing to deserve it. SiriT Vos you owe me money. Where is my money. Vossssss Ohhhh right. Forgot about that. Let me just. Go collect, uh, a thousand credits. Right. Riiiightt. Haha. My bad! 0bi-WanKenobi I don't owe you money Siri, where are my cat memes? SiriT You forgot to send me an invitation for Anakin's birthday party.... 0bi-WanKenobi I am making one right now, hand crafted, cat meme themed even. This injustice will not stand. I will make it up, I will repent. Bant And this portrays my friends. Thanks for coming to my Jedi Talk. #NFriends #Dumbasses #Idiot Friends 923,373,237 notes

IcarusTC 0bi-WanKenobi 0bi-WanKenobi Dy 16, both Ani and I are now better. We only have lingering coughs, but tea has solved any sore throat issues. The pillow fort is our home. Once again, shut up Vos. Vossssss I hope your tea leaves grow moldy. 0bi-WanKenobi Bold of you to assume I won't drink them moldy. Vossssss This is why I don't drink your tea. 0bi-WanKenobi Bold of you to assume I checkmy caf for mold. Vossssss Oh Force, I'm going to the healers RIGHT NOW. IcarusTC Mold... Mold mention by my favorite Jedi comedy duo... Mold.... #Kenobi and Vos #Mold #My daily newsfilmsi 322,319,983 notes