Chapter Text
MICROSOFT TEAMS
Ottawa Centaurs
July 5th, 2021
10:54 am
Harris Drover: It is my pleasure to announce that as of this morning, Shane Hollander has officially signed with the Ottawa Centaurs! As I’m sure you all know, Shane plays center. He will wear jersey #24! For future reference, Shane’s email is [email protected]. Welcome, Shane!
-Harris Drover | He/Him/His
Senior Director of Communications
Brandon Wiebe: I think I speak for all of us when I say how excited I am to welcome Shane to the team! We are so happy to have you here, and we hope that this season will be a positive experience and an opportunity to learn and grow for all of us.
-Brandon Wiebe | He/His/Him
Head Coach for the Ottawa Centaurs
Zane Boodram: welcome, Shane! We’re so happy to have you, man! Hopefully you can help us keep Roz in line lol
Oskar Holmberg: Welcome, Shane! We are very excited to have you join us 😄
Wyatt Hayes: We’re so excited to have you, man, welcome aboard! 🎉♥️
Luca Haas: Welcome, Shane! We are so excited to have you here!
Troy Barrett: really happy you’re here, Shane :)
Ilya Rozanov: yes, welcome Shane!
Tyler Young: I’m a big fan, man, thanks for joining!! Super excited to play with you 🙂
Evan Dykstra: hey Shane! Happy you’re here man 🤜🤛 if anyone messes with you, we’ve got your back
Tanner Dillon: welcome Shane!
Nick Chouinard: Bienvenu, Shane! Je suis très contente d'avoir une autre personne qui parle français. (Welcome, Shane! I am very happy to have another person who speaks French.)
Sébastien LaPointe: Oui, un autre allié! Bienvenu! (Yes, another ally! Welcome!)
Cory Boyle: Welcome, man! We’re super happy to have you here.
Shane Hollander: Merci beaucoup; thank you so much, everyone! I’m so excited to be here, and I can’t wait to start playing with you all.
Ilya Rozanov: you have been playing with me already ;)
Zane Boodram: or Roz will be like this lol
Harris Drover: Please remember this is an official team channel, everyone!
Wyatt Hayes: “everyone” @ Ilya Rozanov
Harris Drover: Thank you, Wyatt!
Chiron fan club
July 5th, 2021
11:23 am
Nick Chouinard: Now that Hollander has officially signed, does that mean we can add him to the groupchat?
Zane Boodram: yes!
Evan Dykstra: Oh shit yeah
Evan Dykstra: Does anyone have his number
Zane Boodram: …
Zane Boodram: I’ll give you one guess as to who probably has it, buddy
Evan Dykstra: ah
Tyler Young: LMAO
Evan Dykstra: @ Ilya Rozanov can you add your man please
Evan Dykstra: Sorry Susie is having a sleep regression stage and I was up like half the night trying to convince her to go to sleep
Zane Boodram: oof, I’m sorry man :(
Evan Dykstra: Thanks. At least it’s a stage right? hopefully it’ll be over at some point lol
Zane Boodram: I hope so 😭 Milo’s supposed to have another sleep regression in like 2 months and I feel like we just got through the last one
Nick Chouinard: It is the worst while you’re in the middle of them, but you’ll be able to get through it, both of you.
Zane Boodram: thanks man <3
Wyatt Hayes: oh I can add Hollander
Wyatt Hayes: just give me one sec
Wyatt Hayes: here ya go!
Wyatt Hayes added Shane Hollander
Zane Boodram: oh shit thanks, Hazy
Evan Dykstra: Wait how do you have Shane’s number Hazy
Wyatt Hayes: the Irina Foundation training camps haha
Evan Dykstra: ah
Shane Hollander: Hey, guys! Thanks for adding me :)
Zane Boodram: yeah of course, we’re so happy you’re here!
Zane Boodram: I know training doesn’t start for another 2 months but I figured you should be in here lol
Shane Hollander: No, I really appreciate it! Thanks, guys!
Ilya Rozanov: aw no
Ilya Rozanov: who beat me to adding Shane to groupchat?
Evan Dykstra: sorry man, Hazy had his number
Zane Boodram: in all fairness, I did @ you lol, Hazy just beat you to the punch
Evan Dykstra: where were you anyway man
Ilya Rozanov: my handsome fiancé has just signed with new team, he deserves reward, yes?
Zane Boodram: lol get it Rozy!
Zane Boodram: or get it Hollzy!
Evan Dykstra: lmao so this is what its like to have married teammates huh
Ilya Rozanov: oh but we are not married yet, Dykstra, just imagine how chat will be when we are ;)
Evan Dykstra: oh lord
Evan Dykstra: I feel like we might need a censored version of the chat for Haas and the rookies
Ilya Rozanov: would probably not be a bad idea
Chiron fan club
July 6th, 2021
10:12 am
Ilya Rozanov: reminder that wedding is July 10th! ceremony will be at 2:00 pm at Shane and I’s house 😎
Shane Hollander: We’re really excited to see you all!
Zane Boodream: WOOHOO!!!!
Wyatt Hayes: HELL YEAH!!!
Troy Barrett: 🎉🎉🎉
Sébastien LaPointe: Félicitations! (Congratulations!)
Evan Dykstra: this is going to be the wedding of the century
Shane Hollander: Haha, it probably won’t be that wild! Sorry, guys!
Ilya Rozanov: no, they are right
Ilya Rozanov: will be exciting just because it is us
Tyler Young: Oh hell yeah
Tyler Young: I bought a special tie just for the occasion, it should be here tomorrow
Cory Boyle: You can’t say that and then not share.
Tyler Young: Lol true
Tyler Young:
Oskar Holmberg: What the fuck is that
Wyatt Hayes: with all the love in the world, buddy
Wyatt Hayes: you Can Not wear that to the wedding
Sébastien LaPointe: Seconded
Sébastien LaPointe: C’est trés putain de moche, mon dieu (That is so fucking ugly, my god)
Nick Chouinard: Brûlez-le. À présent. (Burn it. Now.)
Tyler Young: It isn’t that bad!!!
Tyler Young: I thought it would be special :(
Cory Boyle: And it is special. It is so, so special.
Wyatt Hayes: But you can’t wear it, bud
Ilya Rozanov: yes he can
Ilya Rozanov: special permission from groom
Cory Boyle: Are you sure Roz 😭
Evan Dykstra: He’s just trying to make sure no one will upstage him LMAO
Wyatt Hayes: let's maybe wait till Shane sign says its okay too lol
Ilya Rozanov: no no no
Ilya Rozanov: is my big day too, yes?
Ilya Rozanov: I say is fine
Ilya Rozanov: Shane will love it
Ilya Rozanov: ignore them, tie is great
Tyler Young: Thank you Roz!!!
Nick Chouinard: Oh lá lá, c’est parti. (Oh boy, here we go.)
Sébastien LaPointe: Pourquoi est-ce que je ne pense pas que Shane va aimer ça? (Why do I think Shane won’t love this?)
Tanner Dillon: did you just actually say oh la la
Sébastien LaPointe: Mec, va en enfer (Man, go to hell)
Nick Chouinard: Oui, va te faire foutre (Yeah, kiss my ass)
Wyatt Hayes: Oh boy
Shane Hollander: Oh my god
Shane Hollander: You know what, yeah, wear the tie
Ilya Rozanov: told you
Private Messaging between Zane Boodram and Luca Haas
July 7th, 2021
11:27 am
Luca Haas: What is considered a good wedding gift for Canadians?
Zane Boodram: usually couples in North America do a wedding registry, but I’m actually not sure if Roz and Shane are?
Zane Boodram: hold up, let me check
Chiron fan club
July 7th, 2021
11:31 am
Zane Boodram: hey, are you guys doing a wedding registry?
Shane Hollander: No, we have pretty much everything we need, thank you for asking though!
Shane Hollander: Honestly, just having a supportive team on top of an amazing partner and a loving family is more than I ever dreamed of. Thank you, guys.
Zane Boodram: okay, now I’m kind of sad and pissed off at Montreal, but yeah, of course
Zane Boodram: love you guys <3
Oskar Holmberg: I second what Bood said.
Oskar Holmberg: Both the Montreal hate and the love for you guys.
Evan Dykstra: A fucking men
Evan Dykstra: Love you guys
Shane Hollander: It’s fine, I don’t want any drama, I’m just trying to focus on the future right now. We love you all too. ♥️
Oskar Holmberg: I would never go against your wishes, Shane.
Oskar Holmberg: But as your teammate and a member of Ottawa, I will be putting my whole being into destroying any pathetic chance Montreal ever had at winning without you, which, admittedly is very, very little.
Evan Dykstra: Woah
Cory Boyle: Wow
Tyler Young: It’s okay, Holmie, none of us are going to let Montreal mess with Shane, okay?
Evan Dykstra: Definitely not
Oskar Holmberg: It will be nothing they have not wrought upon themselves. Allting går igen; what goes around, comes around, ja?
Cory Boyle: When did your English get so good, Holmberg?
Oskar Holmberg: I have been watching Mad Men.
Oskar Holmberg: It is very educational.
Zane Boodram: yeah, what they did to you, Shane, is not okay at all. I know Hayden’s chill and J.J. apologized, but the rest of them can go to fucking hell.
Zane Boodram: you built them a winning team, and this is how they thank you? we’re going to destroy them on the ice and take them for everything they’re worth
Shane Hollander: Okay, wow.
Shane Hollander: I appreciate it, Oskar. And Bood. And thank you, guys. Yeah, it really didn’t feel great.
Ilya Rozanov: they are all right. fuck montreal. stupid fucking city. stupid fucking team.
Shane Hollander: You know what, yeah.
Shane Hollander: When the season starts, we’re going to take them down.
Evan Dykstra: HELL YEAH
Zane Boodram: AMEN
Ilya Rozanov: whatever money they saved when Shane signed here, they will be using it to pay when we meet them on the ice
Private Messaging between Zane Boodram and Luca Haas
July 7th, 2021
1:37 pm
Luca Haas: Also, will they be having a polterabend? I do not think it is common in Canada, but I do not know if it is also part of Russian wedding celebrations?
Zane Boodram: what’s a polterabend?
Luca Haas: It is when the couple and their family and friends gather in front of the house the night before the wedding to smash china and porcelain and ceramics, so that the couple will have luck in their marriage.
Zane Boodram: hahahaha what the hell, that’s amazing
Zane Boodram: I’ve never heard of that but I hope they’re doing it
Chiron fan club
July 7th, 2021
1:43 pm
Zane Boodram: yo, Roz and Shane, Haasy would like to come smash some of your guys’ china on the evening of the 23rd if you guys are partial to it?
Luca Haas: NO THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT
Luca Haas: There is a tradition in Switzerland called the Polterabend where the day before a couple’s wedding, they and family and friends gather and smash porcelain in celebration of the wedding to bring good luck to the couple! The couple then clean up the mess together to represent the hard work involved in a marriage!
Luca Haas: I asked Bood if this was also a custom in Russia and he said he didn’t know but it sounded fun
Luca Haas: I do not intend to ruin your nice dining ware! I was just wondering if this would be part of your celebrations! I am sorry!
Tyler Young: LMAO
Evan Dykstra: oh hell yeah that sounds epic
Evan Dykstra: Roz can we smash some pottery
Ilya Rozanov: no, is not a custom in Russia, or at least not in my family
Ilya Rozanov: but yes, it does sound fun
Private Messaging between Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov
July 7th, 2021
2:02 pm
Ilya Rozanov: before you say no
Ilya Rozanov: would be fun
Shane Hollander: Say no to what?
Shane Hollander: Ah
Shane Hollander: Where would we even get all the pottery? And how would we clean it up? What if Anya stepped on a shard or something?
Ilya Rozanov: we could put tarp down on driveway and smash pottery on that
Ilya Rozanov: that way clean up is easy
Ilya Rozanov: and we can find broken pottery at charity shops
Ilya Rozanov: also troy and harris took pottery classes last february/march
Ilya Rozanov: there are many ugly pots harris would probably like to be rid of
Shane Hollander: Troy made those for Harris! We’re not going to ask them to bring their beautiful pottery just so we can throw it on the ground.
Ilya Rozanov: “beautiful”
Shane Hollander: Yeah, okay.
Shane Hollander: Still, I’m not asking Harris and Troy to bring their own pottery just to destroy it.
Shane Hollander: But if you want to, and we can get a tarp and find some broken pottery in time, then I’m in.
Ilya Rozanov: excellent!
Shane Hollander: Also, if you’re not checking out yet, can you get some more ginger ale, please? We’re almost out.
Ilya Rozanov: oh so you think I am rookie
Ilya Rozanov: i already got more ginger ale, моя любовь (my love)
Shane Hollander: Я тебя люблю. (I love you.)
Ilya Hollander: Я тебя люблю (I love you)
Chiron fan club
July 7th, 2021
2:22 pm
Shane Hollander: Alright, whoever wants to come is now invited to the Hollander-Rozanov Polterabend, July 9th at 6:00 pm at our house! There will be a tarp on the driveway so it won’t be as dangerous/difficult to clean up, so please restrict your ceramic destruction to the tarp! Snacks will be provided, but if you have any broken pottery that you wouldn’t mind getting further destroyed, please bring it! Kids are welcome :)
Ilya Rozanov: *Rozanov-Hollander Polterabend
Ilya Rozanov: but yes, please come
Wyatt Hayes: I’m so in hahahaha
Evan Dykstra: HELL YEAH
Evan Dykstra: Susie can definitely help with the destruction part
Oskar Holmberg: She will be a great future defenseman.
Evan Dykstra: Lmao, yeah true
Zane Boodram: hell yeah!!! great idea, Haasy!
Luca Haas: I do not know if it was my idea, it was just my question.
Luca Haas: But thank you for the invitation, I will be there!
Game Changers Camp Coaches
July 7th, 2021
2:37 pm
Shane Hollander: Hey, everyone! I know this is pretty last minute, but Ilya and I are going to be having a small get together at ours the evening before the wedding! One of our teammates is Swiss and there’s apparently a Swiss tradition where family and friends come over and destroy pottery. So, if you guys are interested, the Hollander-Rozanov Polterabend will be on July 9th at 6:00 pm at our house! Kids are welcome. :)
Max Reilly: oh hell yeah
Max Reilly: this is the best thing I’ve ever heard of
Max Reilly: why don’t canadians do this
Ilya Rozanov: because canadians are boring
Ilya Rozanov: especially Hayden @ Hayden Pike
Max Reilly: LMAO
Hayden Pike: I didn’t even say anything?????
Hayden Pike: But yeah, we’ll be there! If there’s one thing the kids are really good at, it’s breaking shit lmao
Leah Campbell: omg hahahaha
Leah Campbell: Max and I will be there, though, thank you guys!! I have a really ugly set of china from my homophobic great-grandmother that I never use, so I can bring that :)
Max Reilly: oh shit yeah, I forgot to say we’ll be there but we will
Leah Campbell: I’ve got you, babe
Ryan Price: Oh, cool. Fabian and I are in. Thanks, guys.
J.J. Boiziau: Oh that sounds pretty awesome, I’ll so in
Wyatt Hayes: lmao, I’m still in guys, I can’t wait
Shane Hollander: Okay great, thanks you all! We’re really excited to see everyone before the camps start! :)
Leah Campbell: yeah of course! thank you for organizing this and reaching out! love you all ♥️♥️♥️
Shane Hollander:♥️♥️♥️
Private Messaging between Shane Hollander and Rose Landry
July 7th, 2021
2:51 pm
Shane Hollander: Do you want to come break a bunch of stuff at ours on the evening of July 9th?
Rose Landry: omg yes please
Rose Landry: is this for something in particular or just cause?
Shane Hollander: Technically it's for the wedding? It’s a Swiss tradition.
Rose Landry: neat. I fuck with it.
Private Messaging between Ilya Rozanov and Svetalana Vetrova
July 7th, 2021
2:52 pm
Ilyusha: would you like to come break pottery at Shane and I’s house the evening before the wedding?
Svetochka: yes
Svetochka: are you German now?
Ilyusha: no, a Swiss rookie suggested it
Svetochka: interesting. I did not know it was done in Switzerland too.
Svetochka: I will be there. I will bring the good vodka.
Ilyusha: excellent, thank you.
Svetochka: you are welcome.
Private Messaging between Harris Drover and Shane Hollander
July 7th, 2021
8:03 pm
Harris Drover: Hey, Shane!! I got your number from Troy lol, I just wanted to ask if you had a plan for the pottery shards after the Polterabend?
Shane Hollander: Hey, Harris!! Thanks for reaching out! We don’t actually, I was going to take them straight to the dump next week probably? But do you have another idea?
Harris Drover: Yeah, if you guys didn’t mind, one of the photographers for the Centaurs does pottery and mosaics on the side, and she was wondering if she could have the shards afterwards? She has a big truck, so she should be able to move them pretty easily!
Shane Hollander: Oh my god, yeah totally! That would be a lot easier for us haha. And is that Gen? I think I met her when I signed!
Harris Drover: Yeah, that’s her!! She’s super talented! Troy got us pottery lessons with her as my Valentine’s present but neither of us are following in her footsteps lol
Shane Hollander: Hahahaha, I’m sure you’re both great! And feel free to invite her along!
Harris Drover: Aww, I’ll let her know! And it’s okay lol, you don’t have to lie, I know Troy sent Ilya pictures and I’m sure Ilya showed you them haha
Shane Hollander: Okay, I did see the pictures lol, but they weren’t that bad! It just takes practice!
Harris Drover: True lol, but I’m not sure anyone wants to practice if that's what it looks like
Shane Hollander: Hahahaha!
Hollander Family Groupchat
July 9th, 2021
9:03 pm
Yuna Hollander: Make sure you both get to bed early tonight! You have a very busy day tomorrow. We love you both very much, sweet dreams ♥️😴
Ilya Rozanov: thank you, Yuna! we will, you and David make sure to get some sleep as well!♥️
Yuna Hollander: Thank you, Ilya! We will!♥️
Game Changers Camp Coaches
July 15th, 2021
9:42 am
Shane Hollander: Hey, everyone! Thank you so much for joining or coming back to be a coach for the 2021 Game Changers Hockey Camp! The first camp this year will be in Montreal from July 19th to July 23rd, and the second will be in Ottawa from July 26th to July 30th.
Shane Hollander: I think most of you know each other, but I’d like to introduce our three new coaches just in case! Our new defensive coach will be Evan Dykstra of the Ottawa Centaurs and our new forward coaches will be Troy Barrett of the Ottawa Centaurs and Scott Hunter of the New York Admirals!
Leah Campbell: aw hey, welcome you guys! we’re super excited to be working with you all!! <3
J.J. Boiziau: Welcome you guys!!
Max Reilly: aw hell yeah
Scott Hunter: Hahaha, thank you guys! I’m excited to be here!
Scott Hunter: And thank you for the opportunity. I know Vaughny is already asking if he can come next year if you’d like another set of hands 😊
Shane Hollander: Definitely, that would be amazing! Thank you for joining!
Ilya Rozanov: wait
Ilya Rozanov: when did game changers camp start hiring dinosaurs?
Ilya Rozanov: and what is point of so many museums in this boring city if we had to import dinosaur from america?
Ilya Rozanov: now dinosaur is stupid as well as old
Ilya Rozanov: will be of no use
Scott Hunter: And now I’m starting to wonder why I was excited…
Game Changers Camp Coaches
July 21st, 2021
8:17 am
Wyatt Hayes: does anyone want to go see the new X-Squad movie with me tonight?
Leah Campbell: oooooh yes!!! won’t Halcyon be in this one 👀
Wyatt Hayes: she will! Sophia Burner from Game of Crowns is playing her!
Leah Campbell: oooh I’m definitely in!!
Max Reilly: oh damn okay, count me in too
J.J. Boiziau: Oh hell yeah, I’m in 😎
Ryan Price: Lol I’m in, Hazy
Scott Hunter: I’ll probably pass on this one, thanks for the invite though!
Wyatt Hayes: yeah of course!!
Evan Dykstra: I’m going to Facetime Susie and Caitlin, thanks for the invite though!
Troy Barrett: yeah, I’m probably going to call Harris and see how his day was. Thanks Hazy
Ilya Rozanov: is too early for nerd shit, Hazy
Wyatt Hayes: well that’s completely untrue
Hayden Pike: Ignore him, Wyatt
Shane Hollander: Yes, please ignore Ilya. What he meant to say is that we are going to pass on this one, thank you for the invite, though!
Hayden Pike: I’ll come if the offer’s still open!
Hayden Pike: I can’t remember the last time I saw a movie that was rated anything above PG
Wyatt Hayes: the offer definitely still stands! and lmao, I can confirm we will be solidly in PG-13 territory :)
Hayden Pike: I’ll take it
Game Changers Camp Coaches
July 30th, 2021
5:49 pm
Shane Hollander: Thank you guys so much for all of your help these past few weeks! We truly could not have done it without you all, and we are so grateful for all of your help.
Ryan Price: Happy to help. Thanks for inviting me back.
Leah Campbell: aww of course! glad to be here, as always :)
Evan Dykstra: Thanks for having us! I hope I didn’t do too badly for a first-timer
Ilya Rozanov: you have nothing to worry about Dykstra
Ilya Rozanov: Hunter on other hand…
Scott Hunter: Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.
Scott Hunter: Thank you, Shane, for having me. The parts of these two weeks where Rozanov was not talking were distinctly enjoyable.
Wyatt Hayes: fair enough
Private Messaging between Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov
July 30th, 2021
5:54 pm
Shane Hollander: Mom and I are almost finished putting the equipment away, could you meet us at the car after? I didn't bring the other key
Ilya Rozanov: no, but I will bring car around to front door for you both
Shane Hollander: Thank you, Ilya. You don't have to do that.
Ilya Rozanov: I know. I do it because I love you and Yuna
Shane Hollander: And we love you too ♥️
Shane Hollander: I’m looking forward to going to bed tonight haha
Ilya Rozanov: me too
Ilya Rozanov: but I am also looking forward to going to Ibiza next month
Shane Hollander: Okay, that too haha
Shane Hollander: But I’m looking forward to everything, as long as I’m with you. ♥️
Ilya Rozanov: Я тебя люблю (I love you) ♥️
Shane Hollander: Я тебя люблю (I love you) ♥️