Work Text:
Lisa was not having a good day.
The cause?
Attributed solely to the two capes accompanying her, who for some logic-defying, horrible reason had decided to fuck with her.
Well, probably. They could be doing it for any number of reasons, with annoying Lisa being a happy side-benefit. She refused to turn her power on them, not wanting to give them the satisfaction.
Alec and Cherie walked in lockstep, hips and knees brushing as they pressed into each other as much as possible.
Cherie wrapped an arm around his waist, simpering up at him with huge, infatuated eyes.
Instead of the bored teammate Lisa had come to know, Alec had-- somehow-- transformed into what can only be described as the male lead of a very raunchy, very romantic stage drama.
He looked utterly smitten.
“Do you want another iced coffee, kitten?” Alec leaned in, pulling her closer with the arm around her shoulders to kiss her temple.
“No thank you, daddy.” Cherie giggled, pressing closer. “All I need is you.”
Alec’s face-- spasmed. He inhaled while disguising it as a smile and pressed another kiss to her hair.
It was like watching a trainwreck. Lisa tried and failed to ignore them, browsing through the sweater selection. She didn’t even wear sweaters.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw something shift briefly on his face. He smirked.
“Well, why don’t you go look at the lingerie section, hm?” Alec’s hand slid down, grabbing a firm handful of ass. Cherie jumped, startled, and Alec pulled her in closer, growling in her ear. “Pick out something special to wear for daddy.”
Lisa wished she didn’t have ears.
Cherie’s smile froze in place. For a moment, her eyes got wide, and then she relaxed, the smile becoming more natural. She giggled again, leaning in to kiss his jaw.
“Okay.” She breathed. “Be right back. You won’t miss me too much while I’m gone?”
Alec tipped her chin over and kissed her, hot and open mouthed. Cherie rose up on her toes into it, moaning loudly. Half the store turned to look.
The girl half draped herself over him, kicking her left foot up. Lisa’s eye twitched.
“How could I leave you?” She pressed herself close. “Even a minute is too long.”
“Little girls that don’t listen get punished, princess. Go.” He smacked her ass and Cherie flinched, before painting on a smile.
She flounced off, pausing a few feet away to send a sultry look over her shoulder.
“I know we’re villains and all, but this is some real sick shit.”
Alec-- whose entire expression had fallen eerily flat the moment Cherie was gone-- turned to Lisa with an amused huff.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He started looking through the jeans next to her.
“There’s petty thieves, there’s mercenaries, there’s hardcore villains, supervillains, and S-rank threats-- and then there’s whatever the fuck that was.” Lisa said.
“Can a man not love his sister?” Alec put a hand over his heart as though wounded, expression unchanging.
“That is not brother-sister behavior.” Lisa did a full body shudder. “You two barely have secret identities as it is, why not hang up the masks and join New Wave if you’re gonna be all over each other like that?”
Alec snorted, eyes amused.
“I bet that’s the real reason they haven’t had any new members join in the last few years.” He said. “They weren’t incestuous enough for them.”
“Are you at least almost done with-- whatever this is?” Lisa asked, trying to keep the desperation out of her tone. She managed ‘exasperated’, at least.
“Mm, I hope so.” Alec threw a pair of skinny jeans into Lisa’s cart. “I thought it would be easy, but she’s distressingly good at this.”
“At what?” Lisa demanded. "What's the point of all this sickeningly sweet--”
“Stud muffin!” The blonde’s face fell as Cherie power walked over, throwing herself into Alec’s arms. “They don’t have anything cute enough here. I refuse to wear any of it!”
“Aw, that’s okay, babygirl.” Alec caught her easily, both hands on her hips. They eased around to wrap around her back. He kissed her again, slow and sweet.
Then paused, draw away, and spent an even longer time kissing her. Like, an excessively long time, as Cherie whimpered against his lips.
“Do you mind!?” Lisa hissed, once people had started looking over aghast. A sales-worker started approaching.
“Schnookums, can we go?”
“Whatever you want.” Alec put his chin atop her head for a long moment, swaying side to side. Cherie sighed contently.
Lisa contemplated walking away. Not even going back to the car. Just getting a taxi back to the loft, or perhaps to New York. She could start a new life.
Her dreams were interrupted as Alec abandoned their cart and waved her forward, shifting until he was holding Cherie’s hand.
“C’mon, Lis, let’s get something to eat.”
“Fine.” She marched ahead of them, relishing in not being able to see them. They’d probably give it a break while eating, right?
Wrong.
Twenty minutes later they were seated at the food court, and Alec was sitting in Cherie’s lap. They were giggling and feeding each other.
The extremely crowded food court.
They’d split up to get their meals, and when they reconvened, something had changed about the dynamic. The siblings were no longer trying to seemingly out-do each other in terms of cringe.
Now they seemed to be trying to push Lisa’s patience to the absolute limit.
“C’mon, sissy, give me another fry.” Alec whined, halfway through an obnoxious-- and horrifically accurate-- little brother routine.
“No, you’re already getting too big! Soon I won’t be able to carry you around anymore. Stay my cute little brother forever!” Cherie shook her head, dipping fries in ketchup and putting them in her own mouth, smacking pointedly.
“You’re so meeeeaaaaaan.” Alec drawled, both arms around her neck and hanging off, mostly deadweight. “I’m telling mom.”
“Finneee.” Cherie offered him a french fry. “Open up, okay?”
Alec made an ahhh noise as he stretched his lips wide.
Cherie fed him the french fry.
“Have you ever thought about going back to Canada?” Lisa snatched her drink up, speaking much quieter than their little... show. “I can help you. We have connections. The right powerset can no-sell your dad, and you can inherit his empire.”
“Alecccc, your friend is trying to get rid of me.” Cherie wrapped both arms around his middle and squeezed, resting her head on his shoulder.
“You’d leave me?” He made big, sad eyes at her, and Cherie spent the next several minutes kissing his face-- as he giggled. Giggled!-- reassuring him.
Lisa looked at her soda.
“Maybe they poisoned this?” She asked hopefully.
A quick glance with her power showed that, no, it was just mediocre and used a sweetener that might eventually give her cancer. Not quick enough. She did push it aside with a grimace.
Cherie cupped his face, leaning in to kiss him sweetly. Alec gasped into it. He even blushed, a bright pink that went right up to his ears.
When they pulled away, he was panting like he’d never been kissed before, lip shiny with it.
“You’re the best sister ever.” He said, dazed and loud enough for several scandalized tourists to whip their heads around at.
“Just don’t tell mom.” Cherie said, in a mock-hushed tone, her own eyes just as wide.
“Why are you doing this?” Lisa finally burst out.
They looked at each other, something unknown passing between them before both shrugged and they turned towards her.
“Well, at first it was a contest.” Alec explained. “Whoever broke character first, or wimped out. That first daddy almost got me.”
“I wasn’t expecting the ass grab.” Cherie admitted. “If you’d played the horndog persona up a bit more, maybe something about how you couldn’t resist me or threatening to fuck me in a changing room-- it might have worked.”
“Damn.” Alec sighed. “I thought about it, but I’m bad at that angle. I can do the dangerous villain ‘you’re trapped in this dungeon with me and who knows what I’ll do to you’ pretty well, all threatening torture and rape, but I’m bad at the....”
He took a sip of his drink, waving a hand. “The incel neckbeard cringe thing.”
“It’s all the same for me.” Cherie said, seemingly unbothered by the Alec in her lap now that they’d both dropped the ‘game’. Lisa kept expecting him to slide into his own chair.
“Yeah?” Alec asked.
“Mm, it’s all some version of wanting a man.” Her voice dripped with disdain. “How you treat the incel is the same way you treat the horndog, and the client-- it’s all the same, they all want to fuck.”
“As fascinating as this is.” Lisa interrupted. “Why this. Now. It’s different than the one-upmanship.”
“Oh this?” Alec gestured to their seating arrangement. “We got bored and decided to see how much we could bother you.”
Lisa’s hand froze over her last bite of food.
Cherie giggled, not fake this time.
“Yeah, it was kind of obvious how much you hated the game, more than both of us combined.” She grinned widely.
The chair squeaked as Lisa pushed abruptly away from the table.
“Alright. You two can find your own way home.”
“Hey!” Cherie said, offended though still sounding far too amused for Lisa’s taste.
She was proud of her life choices, smug that they’d reap the consequences of their actions, right up until Alec’s voice followed her out, echoing loudly through the food court.
“Nooo, big sister, don’t leave us! We’re sorry!”
Oh, no. Now they wanted her in on the game.
Lisa walked faster.
Not in this lifetime!
Now she just had to make it to the car before they caught up, and then she was free.
A day of shopping with two heartbroken was a horrible plan. Never again.
This fic has been converted for free using AOYeet!