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Buck is proud of how productive he's been today.
He's had one of those days where he's managed to get mostly everything done in one burst of adult brained energy. He did the laundry that had been piling up all week, he swept and mopped the floors, he deep cleaned the fridge and threw out their old takeout containers that were starting to smell, he replanted his flower beds in the backyard, replacing the soil with a healthier blend. He even had enough time to reorganize the living room after Eddie mentioned he wanted to move the couch to a different angle last week.
He completed all his mental to-do tasks and still had enough time to stop by the farmers market to pick up some ingredients for dinner.
All in all, he felt very accomplished.
He sent a text to Eddie earlier about how efficient he had been, mostly to brag, and his boyfriend sent back a message promising a reward for his good behavior later. He was very much looking forward to that.
He's just sitting down to eat his lunch, the tv turned on to a new documentary he'd been wanting to watch about the behind the scenes making of a tv show he and Chris had been binge watching together, when the door opens and Chris comes in from school.
Buck turns his head around the couch, a smile on his face to greet his favorite Diaz, “Hey buddy, how was school–”
“Fine.” Chris answers, his tone clipped as he shoves off his shoes and goes to his room quickly, slamming the door shut after him.
Buck blinks on the couch, feeling a little caught in the whirlwind of emotion that just passed him by.
Now, Buck was no stranger to the many moods that existed within the Diaz boys. Over the years, he's figured out how to see the signs ahead of time and act accordingly in order to minimize the damage. Sometimes it works and it results in an honest conversation about how they really feel and then Buck gets them ice cream and they laugh about how dramatic they all can be.
Other times, it results in clipped voices, sharp tones, and arguments that require several hours worth of space before they can even consider coming back to the table. Those days, Buck still gets them ice cream but it's usually to help with the crying that happens after the argument.
Buck tries his best to mediate the situation before it gets to argument levels, but he doesn't always know the full context of the problem. Most days, he can read Eddie like a book so he's able to get ahead of whatever problem the man occasionally talks himself into. It's a little harder with Chris.
When he was younger it was easy to tell what he was thinking, mostly because he often said it out loud and he had the worst poker face so it was easy for Buck to figure out how to help him. Now, however, Chris was a teenager, and getting him to talk about his feelings was sometimes harder than pulling teeth, even on a good day. It helped that he still had an awful poker face when Buck sometimes managed to guess the issue correctly, but getting him to admit it outloud and actually talk to either him or Eddie about it was another thing entirely.
Him being a teenager though did help them to narrow down the problem faster. These days, they're able to put the problem into categories and go from there for how they can help.
Category A: It's a school problem. Which usually means he got in trouble, or he's having difficulty with an assignment and he doesn't know how to ask for help without feeling embarrassed.
Category B: It's a friend problem. Which usually means there's drama in his friend group or he had an argument with one of them and he doesn't know how to fix it.
Category C: It's a girl problem. Which usually means there's more drama, usually caused by a lot of miscommunication on Chris’ part and him not knowing how to be honest about how he really feels with someone.
Category D: Bullying. Chris goes to a good school, and everyone loves him there so he never has actually dealt with bullying, thankfully, but Buck still keeps the category open in his head, just as a worst case.
Buck takes out his phone and makes sure to send off a quick text to Eddie to let him know.
B: Code Yellow :(
E: uh oh
E: do you know what happened yet?
B: no clue, giving him some space for now but I'll check on him in a little bit to see if I can get him to open up
E: did he say anything when he came home?
B: I tried to ask him how school was and he said ‘fine’ but like not in a good way
E: yikes, okay, yeah give him some space for now, hopefully he'll cool off a little
E: sorry I'm not there to help :(
B: its cool, you'd probably just get in the way anyway :p
B: I'll try to have this sorted out before dinner and maybe we'll have the good ice cream after :)
B: I'm making that garlic ginger pork recipe i was telling you about btw
E: can't wait :), I gtg but good luck with him, let me know how it goes <3
B: <3
Buck sets his phone down and leans back on the couch, twisting his head to peek at Chris’ door, “Yep, still closed.” He mumbles to himself.
He gives himself an inward timer of about thirty minutes before he goes to check on him. He preoccupied himself with watching some of the documentary, not really paying much attention to it as his fingers nervously drum on his thigh and he tilts his head periodically to check on Chris’ still very much closed door.
He eventually pauses the documentary and reminds himself that he's an adult and he can do this and that teenagers are not scary before he gets up and walks to Chris’ room. He pauses halfway and makes a detour to the kitchen, grabbing a mug and making hot chocolate the same way Maddie used to make it for him. A peace offering is always useful when dealing with the unpredictability of teenage mood swings.
He clears his throat and knocks softly on Chris’ door, “Hey, can I come in?”
He hears the sound of clicking pausing and Chris says something that Buck can't decipher before opening the door. The good news is that his room is still intact so he at least isn't angry enough to wreck his things. He sits at his computer desk, his headset pulled low on his neck, and his game moving in the background with characters hopping all over the place.
“Hey.” Chris mumbles, leaning back against his chair.
Buck smiles, carefully lifting the mug and setting it on the desk, “Made you some hot chocolate. You doing okay?”
Chris glances briefly between the hot chocolate and Buck, his eyes seeming deeply unimpressed and bored, which tells Buck he has very little time to figure out what's going on and maybe he should retreat.
“I'm fine, Buck.” Chris says, his tone bored in the way only a teenager can ever sound.
Buck nods, his hands coming up in an awkward clap, “Cool, uh, that's good. How was school?”
“Fine.” Chris answers, not giving any hints as to the events of the day.
“Okay, good. Yeah, uh, I guess I'll leave you to it. Enjoy your game.” Buck smiles, backing out of the room carefully like he saw a live grenade.
Chris just grunts and turns back to his game, pulling his headset over his ears once more and going back to ignoring the outside world. Buck closes the door and exhales against the wood, closing his eyes with a small groan.
That was, decidedly, very bad. It also gave him no clues to be able to figure out how to help him so he tells himself to give him more space for now, and just try again later.
Maybe later he'll be able to get a response outside of the word ‘fine’.
Buck decides to go back to the kitchen, checking the time and figuring it's best he get started on his prep for dinner. He sets out his ingredients on the table, grabbing the cutting boards, knives and pots that he'll need and starts scrolling on his phone to find a good playlist to listen to while he cooks.
He closes the fridge and his eye catches on the calendar, his attention being pulled to the date. He notices that Chris has a project due tomorrow for his history class. He doesn't remember Chris saying much about the project but he also doesn't remember seeing him work on it much. There's the possibility of him working on it at school so maybe Buck wouldn't know, but it doesn't hurt to check.
Also if he asks, then maybe it'll help him figure out what's going on in the teen’s head, and that way he can help.
Buck goes to Chris' room again, knocking twice before he hears Chris sigh loudly and open the door again with a slightly annoyed expression.
“Hey, sorry, just wanted to check in since I saw you have a history project due tomorrow?” Buck smiles.
Chris huffs leans back against his chair, “Yeah. I do.”
Buck nods, “Okay, do you mind telling me what it's about?”
Chris shrugs, “I don't know, it's not done yet.”
Buck falters, “Oh. Okay, that's fine, you still have time to work on it tonight.”
Chris sighs, “I guess.”
Buck glances awkwardly around the room before he gets an idea, “Well, how about this? You finish up your game and come to the kitchen to work on the project. Maybe I can help you with your homework, and you can help me with dinner.”
Chris looks up at him, “Sure, whatever.”
Buck nods, keeping his smile in place, “Cool, just come out when you're ready, and I promise not to burn the kitchen down without my sous chef.”
The joke lands flat and Chris turns away from him to go back to his game. Buck takes that as his cue to close the door and walk away.
He at least feels like some progress was made, since they managed to get out of the ‘fine’ territory and into some sentences, however short they may have been.
He heads back to the kitchen humming to himself as he presses play on the playlist he had queued up. He loses himself in the music for a while, chopping up the ingredients he needs and seasoning the meat to his liking. He's halfway through cooking before he looks up, pauses, and glances at the table, noticing the lacking presence of a specific moody teenager.
He looks at the time and sees that it's been almost an hour since he last checked on him. Sure, he did say to take his time and to finish up his game but he knows it doesn't take that long, unless Chris’ friends convinced him to play another match.
Buck sighs, setting the pan to a simmer and stirring around the meat and vegetables before placing a lid on it and going back to Chris’ room.
He knocks again, and waits until Chris says to open it. He doesn't hear anything other than the clacking of the keyboard on the other side. He knocks again and waits. He hears no response. He knocks again, twice in quick succession before he just decides to open the door and peek his head through.
Chris stays focused on his game, his gaze not shifting an inch toward the door as his fingers move quickly across the board.
Buck clears his throat to get his attention, “Chris?”
The teenager continues to play the game, even going so far as to talk into his headset about someone on the enemy team coming into their territory, his focus not budging once.
Buck comes a little more into the room so Chris can clearly see him as he asks again, this time louder, “Chris, buddy, can you pause that?”
Chris rolls his eyes with a huff, “It's a live match, I can't exactly pause it.”
Buck nods awkwardly, “Okay, well can one of your teammates cover you then?”
“Why? This match will be over in a bit.” Chris responds.
Buck sighs, “Well I don't know if you've noticed the time, but you said you'd be in the kitchen with me like an hour ago to work on your project and–”
“Yeah, I'm here, sorry,” Chris says into his headset, “Just someone bothering me about homework.”
Buck pauses, feeling more than thrown off, “What? Chris–”
“Yeah, yeah, I'll get to it later Buck, jeez chill out.” Chris mutters.
Okay.
He's tried to be the good cop, and he really hates having to pull this card but he's also the adult in this situation so now he doesn't really have a choice.
“Or,” Buck says, “You can stop playing your game, and get to it now, while there's still time left in the day. Or do you want to turn in your project late?”
“Ugh, again with this stupid project, literally who cares.” Chris groans.
Buck ignores the urge to let his eye twitch, “I do, and you should too. It's circled on the calendar, so clearly it's gotta count for something.”
“A lot of things are circled on the calendar, that doesn't make them less stupid.” Chris snorts to himself, like his joke is worthy of raucous applause.
“Okay, that's enough. Turn off the game Chris.” Buck pinches the bridge of his nose, trying his best to maintain his composure.
“In a minute.” Chris responds.
“Not in a minute, now.” Buck folds his arms.
“Not in a minute, now.” Chris parrots underneath his breath.
Buck flinches back, “Did you just– okay, that's absolutely not okay, Chris.”
“That's absolutely not okay.” Chris mocks again, his voice doing an imitation of Buck.
Buck decides he's had enough of this and crosses the room. He leans over Chris’ monitor and presses the power button, watching as the screen goes black on itself. He crosses his arms and looks at Chris with what he hopes is his best imitation of how Eddie usually looks when he's about to be stern.
“Buck! Why did you do that?!” Chris gasps, annoyance in his tone.
“Look, I know you had a bad day, and that's okay, and we can absolutely talk about that if you want to, but what we are not going to do is pretend like your school work doesn't matter. You can be in a bad mood and still try to get a good grade, okay buddy?” Buck says, doing his best to try and remedy the situation while also getting his point across.
“What is your problem?! Why do you care so much about this stupid project?!” Chris yells, his face going red and his eyes staying pointed to the floor.
Buck feels himself start to soften as he sees that clearly there's something about the assignment that's bothering him, “I care about you, Chris, and clearly there's something bothering you about this assignment so maybe we can talk about it and I can help you out–”
“Yeah, well, clearly you don't know anything, so stop grasping at straws and pretending like you know everything!” Chris huffs, standing up from his chair.
“You're right, I don't know everything, so maybe you can fill in the gaps for me.” Buck tries to reason.
“You want to know how to help me? Leave me alone and stop getting on my case!” Chris shouts.
Buck exhales carefully through his nose, “Buddy I'm just trying to help–”
“Well stop! And stop calling me that! I'm not your ‘buddy’, I'm not your ‘kiddo’, I'm not your anything! So just get out and leave me alone!” Chris yells.
Buck feels like he was hit in the chest with the force of the words, “Chris–”
“Get out! Leave! I don't want to see you, so just go!” Chris shouts, pushing Buck out the room and locking the door behind him.
Buck stands in front of the door, feeling entirely like his heart was just clawed out of his chest and torn into. He takes a step back from the door and tries to shake off the lump he feels in his throat.
He heads back to the kitchen, finishes up dinner, turns off the stove to let it cool and sighs to himself.
He really hadn't wanted to make it worse but it turns out he excelled at doing just that.
He feels a stinging behind his eyes and recognizes that he is very close to crying. How embarrassing, crying because a teenager yelled at him over his homework. But it's not just any teenager, not to him. It's Chris. His Chris. His buddy, his kiddo, his favorite little man in the whole world. Except, apparently not, according to Chris, which hurts a lot more than he was prepared to admit.
And he knows, he knows that he's just upset, likely for some reason that probably has nothing to do with Buck but it still hurts.
He sighs again, and he hears a car pull into the driveway. He looks at the time on the clock and nods to himself, because he hadn't even noticed that Eddie's shift was over.
He heads to the front, grabbing his wallet, phone, and keys and opening the door to a tired looking Eddie.
“Oh, hey,” Eddie startles with his keys in his hand, not expecting the door to open before he could do it himself. He looks at Buck with a tired smile but it fades quickly as he takes in his expression, “Woah, hey, you okay?”
Buck smiles, because of course Eddie notices as soon as he sees him. God he loves him. And he'd love nothing more than to just fall into his arms and cry as long as possible, but he knows it's not the time for that. He has things to do and Chris probably needs his dad more than Buck does right now.
“No, not really. But it's okay. You should probably tag in though.” Buck laughs, and it comes out wet and not at all casual.
Eddie frowns, “What happened? And where are you going?”
Buck shrugs, mostly to himself as he looks down and fiddles with his keys, “Not much, I mostly just made everything worse, so I think I'm gonna give him some space.”
Eddie comes closer, his hand grabbing Buck's in a soft grip, “Buck, you don't need to go. He's just upset right now, you know that.”
Buck nods, “I do know that, but trust me, I'm the last person he wants to see right now. Don't worry, I'll be back in a bit, okay?”
Eddie takes a minute, searching his eyes carefully with a long look before he leans in and kisses his birthmark, “Okay. Be careful, and don't go too far.”
Buck smiles and kisses his cheek, “Okay. See you in a bit.”
Buck heads to his truck, climbs into the front seat and reverses from the driveway. He takes the long way to his destination, wanting to give the Diaz boys as much time as possible to themselves and also giving himself time to cry.
Eddie has had a long day.
Any shift he works without Buck always feels like a long day regardless, but still, he's exhausted and tired, and all he wants is to cuddle up on the couch with his boyfriend and maybe watch a movie that neither of them will really pay attention to.
But when he'd gotten a text much earlier in the day about their son's after school moodiness and then no subsequent updates about said moodiness, he had a feeling that his long day would be turning into a long night. So when he pulled into the driveway and walked up to the door only to see it open up before he could put the key in, well, his fears were confirmed.
His first instinct when seeing Buck is always to smile because he can't help it, even just the sight of the man pulls joy from him like a flower responds to the sun. But upon actually seeing his expression, the heavy set of his shoulders, the barely kept at bay tears in his eyes, and the tight line of his lips, it wasn't hard to tell that something was wrong.
So now, Eddie shuts the door behind him and watches as Buck pulls away from the driveway.
The house is quiet in that way it always is when the walls are waiting to see if they'll shatter from the weight of an argument. He takes off his shoes and jacket, placing his keys on the hook and sighing to himself. He frowns to himself at how loud it sounds to his ears in the quiet, stale air, hearing it practically echo throughout the house.
Ever since Buck officially moved in with them months ago, or it might be more accurate to say Eddie and Chris moved in with Buck when they came back from Texas, and then Eddie got his head out of his ass and told Buck he was in love with him, and then he just never left– which was fine by Eddie since he planned on never letting him go anyway, Eddie had gotten used to the house never actually being quiet.
There was always something going on in the background if Buck had any say about it. If he was cooking, there would be music for him to sing along to. If he was in the living room just relaxing on the couch, the tv would be on sometimes as background noise while he deep dived on some article he found on his phone. If he was in the shower he would hum to the tune of whatever song is stuck in his head. If he was cleaning there would be a podcast playing in his headphones or on his phone speaker to distract him.
Or most times it would just be his voice, carrying from room to room as he talks to Eddie or Chris about any topic he thinks they'll find interesting, and Eddie never has any inclination of making him stop.
But now it's quiet, too quiet, and it makes his skin itch.
He walks past the kitchen, taking note of the dinner Buck had prepared before leaving, and taking a peek into the pan, smiling to himself from the savory aroma that wafts up to him. He's starving, and he wants more than anything to make a plate with a hearty serving of Buck's food, but he has a task to do first.
His son is going through something and he'll be damned if they don't talk it out before the day is through.
Ever since they came back from Texas, their relationship has been contingent on the agreement that no matter what, no matter how difficult or frustrating it may be, they would always try to communicate how they feel in an honest way.
They've definitely hit some bumps along the way, but they also have managed to avoid any major blowups in a long time due to them vowing to never go to bed angry.
Eddie makes his way to Chris' door hearing nothing but the sound of breathing and resigns himself to sit down. He leans with his back to the door, and knocks on it gently.
“Go away, Buck.” Chris grumbles on the other side.
Eddie huffs a laugh despite himself as he responds, “Sorry, it's just me.”
He doesn't hear anything for a while until there's some noticeable shuffling behind the door. The door stays closed but he can tell that Chris is leaning against it.
“Did he tell you?” Chris asks.
Eddie shakes his head even though he can't see him, “Not really, but I get the sense that something happened. You wanna talk about it?”
Chris is quiet for a moment before he speaks up again, “It's stupid.”
Eddie shrugs, adjusting his legs as he sits against the door, “Lots of things are stupid. Doesn't make them any less worth talking about.”
Chris sighs on the other side, “I have a history project due tomorrow.”
Eddie nods like that makes sense even though he's not sure what that has to do with anything quite yet, “Do you want to tell me what it's about?”
“It's supposed to be simple. It's just a timeline assignment. But it's not simple for me, and it's stupid.” Chris admits.
Eddie tries his best to wrap his head around what that means, “Okay. What makes it not simple?”
He hears Chris thump his head lightly against the door, “It's supposed to be a family timeline.”
Eddie blinks a bit at that, feeling slightly less confused as the problem starts to get a bit clearer, “Oh.”
“Mr. Thornton wants us to make a comprehensive timeline of our family lineage. It's supposed to help us with some other assignment he has planned for us that breaks down the family history of the British monarchy.” Chris explains.
“Okay, that makes sense, mostly. What part are you having trouble with? You know I can give you anything you want to know about our family. Or we can call Abuela and she would be able to give you a better clue too or–” Eddie stops himself as a new thought comes to mind and he sighs, “Is this about mom? Because to be honest Shannon didn't have much family aside from her mom and her sister but I can see if I still have any records that she might've kept–”
“It's not about that.” Chris interrupts, his voice tight and wavering, “I know about our family history. I know about abuela's parents and bisabuela's parents and her kids and their kids too. And I know about mom's family too, even with how little they were.”
“Okay. So then what's the problem?” Eddie asks.
“Buck is family too.” Chris says softly on the other side, “But aside from aunt Maddie, I don't know anything about his family.”
Oh.
Well this is all starting to make a lot more sense to Eddie. Unfortunately.
“I know Buck doesn't talk to his parents anymore– which is good because they suck,” Chris continues, and Eddie can't help but agree, “But there has to be more than just them right? Why is it that I only know about aunt Maddie and his awful parents and no one else? Buck knows so much about us. He knows Abuela, and Aunt Pepa, and Tia Sophia and everyone else we have around us but I don't know anything about who Buck had before he had us. Why does he never bring them up? Why hasn't he introduced us to them? Is he ashamed of us or something? Is he ashamed of me?”
Eddie almost feels like laughing if the words he heard just now didn't also break his heart. In some ways, Chris is right. Buck does know everything about their extended family. In other ways, he is so incredibly, vastly wrong that it makes Eddie want to double over in fits of giggles until he starts crying.
“Mijo, you have no idea just how wrong you are.” Eddie sighs.
Chris huffs, “But why haven't I ever met any of Buck's actual family before? It's like he's hiding us or something. It's not fair.”
Eddie shakes his head, combing a hand through his hair as he tries his best to explain it all, “Do you remember when you were 7, and I had to take you to the station because Abuela couldn't watch you?”
He can hear the audible confusion from Chris as he responds, “Uh, yeah, I guess so? It was the first time I had ever seen where you worked.”
Eddie nods, a smile coming to his lips as he remembers the day all those years ago, “It was also the first day you met the team. Bobby was more than happy to have you there. Hen was delighted to see you for the first time. Chim was just excited to try out his old jokes on a new test subject. And Buck was just happy to see you smile as big and as bright as you did that whole day.”
“Yeah, it was a good day, but what does that have to do with–”
"And the first time we were invited out to a barbecue at Bobby's. It was a celebration to have Buck cleared to come back after his leg injury. Everyone was there.” Eddie continued.
“I remember. There were so many people there it was almost overwhelming, but everyone was so nice it was hard to not feel welcome.” Chris says softly, like he's remembering the day the same way Eddie was.
“It was the first time you met Maddie. She was so instantly endeared by you, it really only took seconds. It was also the first time you had met Karen, Denny, May, Harry, and Athena. They all welcomed us with open arms, just happy that we were there.” Eddie smiles at this memory too, though he allows himself to feel that pang of sadness when he remembers that Buck had also had a pulmonary embolism that same night.
“It was really cool getting to know kids outside of my school. I think Denny probably became my best friend that day.” Chris laughs.
“And the Christmas party we had at the station. Buck planned the whole thing behind my back, coordinated with Carla to make sure you could be brought to the station with the rest of the kids, all so you would be able to spend the holiday with all of us, together.” Eddie folds his arms behind his head.
“That was probably one of the best Christmases we ever had honestly.” Chris says.
“It was.” Eddie agrees, “And do you want to know one of the main reasons, among the many, of why Buck no longer speaks to his parents?”
“Because they suck and they don't deserve him?” Chris guesses.
Eddie laughs, nodding his head, “Well, that's always been true, but another reason is honestly you.”
“Me?” Chris asks, his voice small and a little scared.
“Yeah. Buck wanted them to meet you, because he had been overjoyed at the idea of you having more people in your corner to love and cherish you, and in true Buckley parent fashion, they managed to ruin that idea completely. You know what they said? They said Buck wasn't fit to be a parent and they pitied you for having to deal with him for however long it would take me to realize he wasn't good enough to be in your life.” Even just saying it out loud again caused Eddie's blood to boil at the memory.
There are not many people in this world that Eddie can say he truly hates but the Buckley parents are at the very top of that list.
“They really said that?” Chris asks.
“They did. And you want to know what Buck said? He told them that if that's what they thought then he felt sorry for them, because meeting you and having you in his life has been his greatest privilege.” Eddie smiles, remembering how he was brought to tears that day because his best friend felt so strongly protective of his son that he was willing to cut his parents off completely for it.
They weren't even together back then but Eddie had never felt a stronger impulse to kiss the man stupid than in that moment.
“Really?” Chris says, his voice wobbly.
“Yeah, really. Chris you have to understand, Buck has never been ashamed of you. You think he's hiding you from his family? You met Bobby years ago, that's basically his dad. Athena, and Maddie are the closest he'll ever get to experiencing what a mom should be like. Hen and Karen are practically his older sisters. Chim is literally his brother now, but he already was before he even met Maddie. May and Harry are by all rights his little siblings, even if they don't often say it out loud.” Eddie says.
“He has never hidden you from his family, Chris. They've always been here. They might not seem like a normal family dynamic, and they may not all be related by blood, but they are just as much family as we are. I know it might not make a lot of sense, but before Buck moved from home he really didn't have any family. His parents essentially kept him and Maddie separated from anyone they might've known when they were younger so they never got the chance to know if they had aunts or uncles or cousins. But here, with the 118, they do.” Eddie smiles, thinking of all the different times they've come together as a family unit, however unconventional it may have been.
He hears the door click open and he adjusts so that he's leaning against the wall. Chris sits on the opposite wall, his knees pulled up to his chest and his eyes watery as he looks at the floor.
“I didn't mean to yell at him.” Chris mumbles.
Eddie feels his heart melt as he reaches over and takes one of Chris’ hands, “I know. He knows that too.”
Chris looks up then, his eyes scanning the hallway, and his eyebrows scrunch in confusion, “Wait– where is he?”
“He left for a minute–” Eddie tries to say.
“He left? What, no. No he didn't have to leave, I didn't mean it.” Chris shakes his head, more tears springing to his eyes as he scrambles off the floor and goes to the kitchen, his head swiveling back and forth as he searches for Buck.
“Okay, let's calm down, he's not gone gone, he just left to go somewhere real quick.” Eddie rushes to explain.
“Where?! Where did he go?” Chris demands.
“He–” Eddie pauses, thinking for a moment as he realizes he actually doesn't know where Buck went. When he walked up to the door all he had said was that he would be back, and Eddie believed him, because it's Buck.
“I didn't mean it.” Chris says, gasping slightly for air through his crying, “I didn't mean he should leave. He always stays. Buck always stays.”
Eddie comes closer, crouching a little so that they're eye to eye, “Hey, hey, it's okay, he's coming back.”
“He's not supposed to leave.” Chris says, his voice cracking, “He promised. He said he would always be here, no matter what. I didn't mean to send him away. I didn't mean it. He has to be here.”
“Oh mijo.” Eddie sighs, bringing Chris in for a hug and kissing his forehead, “It's okay, he'll be back–”
Eddie is cut off by the sound of the door opening. Chris pushes off of him and rushes to the door as Buck comes in with a brown bag.
He looks up, looking a little shocked to see Chris out of his room, “Oh, uh, hey–”
Chris rushes forward, his arms going around Buck's waist as he hugs him tightly, “I'm sorry. Don't leave, I'm sorry.”
Buck looks slightly panicked at hearing that as he glances from Chris to Eddie with wide eyes. He gets his bearings quickly as he puts the bag down and brings Chris in for a proper hug, “What– hey, no, no I'd never leave you Chris, you know that.”
“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell, I was just angry and I didn't know how much your parents sucked.” Chris says, crying into Buck's shoulder.
Buck glances at Eddie with confusion for a second, “My parents?”
“I thought you were hiding me from your family, because I've never met any of the people you and Maddie grew up with but dad told me that I already have. That the 118 is your family, and I didn't know, and I'm sorry, and I didn't mean to yell at you, and I'm sorry I told you to go, and I don't actually want you to stop calling me buddy, or kiddo, I'm sorry I said that.” Chris rants as he holds Buck tighter.
“Okay, I feel like I'm missing a lot here, but let me clear something up, alright?” Buck pulls back, his hands holding Chris’ face as he looks at him with the softest eyes Eddie has ever seen, “One, I would never, ever hide you Chris. You make me so proud every single day, I have to hold myself back from bragging about you to every person I meet. Two, my parents do suck, like astronomically, which is why you'll never meet them if I have any say about it. Three, yes, the 118 is my family, always has been, and you're just as much a part of that family if not more. Four, you will always be my kiddo, I'm sorry if I made you think you weren't or if I scared you by leaving.”
Buck reaches down and picks up the brown bag he was carrying, “I was just trying to give you some space since it seemed like you didn't want to see me. And also we were out of the sad ice cream in the freezer.”
Eddie laughs at that unexpectedly, “Really? I thought we had more.”
Buck shakes his head, “Nope. We have like one and a half tubs of the happy ice cream but we're all out of the sad one.”
Eddie smiles at him, feeling nothing but affection in his chest for this amazing man who indulges their weirdness and affinity for different occasion based ice creams. Their happy ice cream, as they like to call it, is the dark chocolate salted caramel swirl that melts in their mouths and brings smiles to their faces. Their sad ice cream is still good because it's just moose tracks ice cream but they call it sad because they have to work to chew it in the same way they have to work through their feelings after an argument.
“I'm sorry,” Chris says, wiping his face, “I think I ate the last of it when I got in a fight with one of my friends.”
“That's okay.” Buck shrugs, "It's what it's there for.”
“So you're not leaving us? And you're not mad at me?” Chris asks.
Buck shakes his head, “Chris, I will never willingly leave you. Even when life tried to take me away from you, I still fought tooth and nail to get back to you, and I always will. And I was never mad at you. I just wanted to help you so you would be less frustrated. I always want to help you if you're having trouble with something, but I could probably be better at not pushing you on it and just letting you come to me, so I'm sorry for not being patient with you. Do you forgive me?”
Chris nods his head, pulling Buck in for another hug, “I'm sorry too. I should've just explained why I was having so much trouble with my project instead of just snapping at you. I really do want your help with it.”
Buck smiles, holding him close, “Of course I'll help, I'd be happy to. But it is pretty late so we might have to pull an all-nighter.”
"Well then,” Eddie says as he crouches down, kissing both of their cheeks, “It's a good thing we have ice cream. The sugar should help to keep us up.”
“We're having ice cream for dinner?” Chris asks, his smile coming back.
“Uh, no we're having dinner for dinner, and then we can have ice cream while we work on your project.” Buck corrects with a smile.
“Fine by me, as long as we eat.” Eddie shrugs.
Chris nods and they all get off the floor and head to the kitchen together. As they make their plates and discuss a layout for Chris’ project, throwing out ideas for how it should look and who they should start with, Eddie feels nothing but lightness in his chest as he looks at their little family unit and how far they've all come together, as well as how far they'll go in the future.
Chris takes a sip of his water and glances between Buck and Eddie with a mischievous smirk, “You know, I wouldn't have had so much trouble with this project if I just had one family to worry about.”
Buck glances up, confused at first, “What do you mean?”
Chris shrugs, grinning at Eddie, “Just that this wouldn't have been such a problem if you two were married already.”
Buck turns bright red at that, choking briefly and gulping down his water to recover as he stutters, “Uh– that's, I mean– Chris, we're not– I mean– we will, probably, but not yet, I mean we only just– and, uh, well–”
Eddie just smirks, meeting his son's gaze as he winks at him, “Well, who knows what the future holds.”