Work Text:
The rounds are in 2 minutes, all the other survivors are going, only Elliot, the most needed support are left alone. Others might call it a blessing for him, but for Elliot it’s a curse. Still, he has to keep on smiling, be the perfect happy man that cheer everyone up. Why?
.
.
He doesn’t know.
‘’Two?’’ He calls out, kneeling down next to the robed figure sitting just right behind the door into the main cabin like a shadow ready to strike. ‘’What are you doing here? The round is about to start.’’
Suddenly the head turned towards him with a manic grin, they always hold that grin, creepy, unsettling and maybe a little cute.. Though only Elliot seems to get the appeal, even Chance the ever so weirdo and Shedletsky ‘mister doesn’t think twice’ back off for the first while.
‘’Hello dearest Elliot, I was simply just showing the spawn my utter most devotion for he is our saviour in this sinful hellish place.’’ They said with glee and Elliot could swore there were lights shining on the cultist as if they were some kind of Disney princess.
‘’U- Uhm… Okayy.. Good for you..?’’ He tried to be kind and understanding, he really does. But all the feelings sitting uglily on top of each other was making it hard to. ‘’A- anyway.. Do you have any plan for the round? You know.. Without me and all..’’ He leans forward, trying to not sound egoistic while also keeping up the conversation that he won’t be able to have for the next hour. (A round lasted an hour, an intermission will lasted anywhere from 2 hour to what they assumed is a whole day rest all depends on the spectre mood – they doesn’t know tho)
‘’No.’’
Oh, well that’s awkward-
‘’But I’m sure our dearest spawn will grant us his mercy and grace and save us all without your divine healings bread.’’ They clasped their hands around Elliot’s, cold skin against warm skin. One scarred and one charred.
Suddenly the figure before him is gone, went in a blink. And now he was alone again in this big but suffocating space. He feels it immediately, the numbness. It started at the tip of his fingers before slowly spreading to his head.
‘’Nope- Not here.’’ He turns on his feet and start running up the stairs to his bedroom, unfortunately his feet must’ve caught onto something, sending him falling down the stairs. But he didn’t cry, he didn’t even wince. Just immediately sat up and ran up the stairs again.
The door shuts with a loud bang behind him, he can feel it fully now. The aches, the throbbing and agonizing needs to-
His feet drags heavily against the carpet of his room, one shared with the world most annoying gambler. He wouldn’t say that about them if they hadn’t leave him alone to go and gamble just before the round start..
‘’Umpf-‘’ The air got knocked out of his lungs when his body hit the hard mattress chest first. It has been so long since he was truly ever alone like this. Most of the time it was him in the round as the team only healer, but when he does get time off there would always be another survivor alongside him that he didn’t mind being with. But right now he just want someone. Anyone, even 7n7, even the killer.-
It's a dirty and shameful things that he didn’t want to admit. But he actually like the feeling of being killed. For that piercing pain that makes him cry and gasp, finally will his body feel something rather than the numbness that he felt after..
The fire.
The first time it was 7n7 and his college twinks doing, it was the most horrible things Elliot has ever witness then. His beloved pizzeria burning down to the ground, his left shoulder was entirely engulfs in flames as he tried to save someone. That perosn survives thankfully, but his body was never the same after that. After being discharged from the hospital he went to see a specialist, they told him his senses of pain has been numbed (Like he still feel it but not as intense as before- is that a real thing? Idk), but all he heard was he was robbed of the things that made him human. He scoffed for the first time ever and raged out of there fast. Of course not before paying them and quickly apologising.
He didn’t tell anyone, how could he just walk up to someone dear to him and just told them ‘Oh no sorry, I failed as a human. I can’t feel pain anymore.’ That’s just ridiculous and sad. He would rather suffer it all again than make people cry over him-
Well maybe he had jinxed that since a decade later the same incident happens through the same GUI, the same fuckass smile. But instead of the old man, dad bod and ugly ass face there it was a red tampon kid. The kid that 7n7 adopted, the cause of 7n7 retirement as a hacker and the cause of Noli heartbreak. (Fucking loser) (can yall tell I hate NolI?) (not rly tho) (fk it I hate that bitch)
Anyway-
The second time hits him really hard and he began to feel the ache. That ache and longing for the same fear and pain he felt. Now his entire back and left arm was filled with burns, lingered across his skin like a worn out map. A map that leads to nothing but pain and suffering.
That’s where everything goes downhill. Because he got addicted, to that sense of soaring pain that shoots through his entire back, the smell of his flesh being burnt, it wasn’t like any other meat he has smell being grilled.
It wasn’t even a special day, just another Thursday working like that’s all he can do to earn the world forgiveness for failing as a human being. He was on his break, sitting in an alleyway in the back of the Builder Brother’s pizzeria. The entire mood was muddy, just like the ground, it had rained heavily just a moment earlier, the cold air brushed past his skin as he breathes out a puff of smoke. Smoking was the thing he turned to after getting over the fact that he really can’t feel pain unless it was something really severe. He wasn’t even thinking of it he swore, but when he threw the cigarette down and crushed it under his sole.
Watching as the flame died down under his foot, his brain went to auto-mode. Taking out the lighter again he lit it and watches the flames dances around with the wind. Now that it wasn’t spreading everywhere hurting everyone he actually found it pretty. So pretty and pure… unlike him. In a moment the sleeves on his left arm were pushed up. Pain immediately starts to seeps into his bone the moment he puts the lit lighter under his upper arm. Right on top of the already burnt skin, pretty smart move to hide it he had to compliment himself even if he feels like he doesn’t deserve it.
He stayed there like that for a while, he could smell his flesh burning again, feel that sharp soaring pain that he used to stayed up all night thinking about.
‘’Clank-!’’ The lighter slipped from his grasp, falling onto the ground as the fire died out. He fell hard against the wall, slumping down until he was sitting on the cold dirty streets.
‘’Hic-..’’ A broken sobs leaked out of his throat as he cried for the first time since forever. He hasn’t cried in a long time… ever since… ever since the day Mia was born.
11 years ago a little girl was born, white hair, blue eyes, piercing gaze, all like her mom, she was basically her carbon copy. That day her big brother also cried like a baby, overwhelmed by everything, the bright hospital lights, the five little finger that warped around his, the quiet little breathing coming from that small yellow body, the warmth of a live cradle in his arms. It’s all so strange yet familiar.
Safe to say he was smitten.
.
.
Just an hour later they were admitted from the hospital and back into their home sweet home. ‘’Dad look! She’s still holding my finger!’’ Elliot coos, hovering over the crib his mom has placed little Mia in. His dad, Mister Builder chuckled from the doorway, one hand wrapped around his mom, Misses Builder. They were happy, everything is alright, everything is fine.
Well that was what he believed until a ring tear through the comfortable silent. It was Mister Builder phone, his work phone specifically. He quickly excuses himself and went into the hallway, Misses Builder looks sad, hopeless to be precise. Like she had expected this would happen. Like he would choose work over them again. But she just gave birth today… Surely he can’t be that heartless right..?
Well she was dead wrong, once again he quickly peeked inside, announce he was leaving for an emergency at work again, but this time Misses Builder didn’t let it go.
The fight started small, small enough that he didn’t see it coming. Elliot was still engrossed with the tiny lives in the crib until he heard them. Hysterical screams coming from his mom demanding his dad stayed with them. His dad attempts at trying to calm her down by saying it’s important for the company didn’t do anything but worsen it. Begging soon turns into cursing and accusations Elliot never wish on anyone. (Except one now) (Yeah fuck u Spectre)
Things turns ugly way too fast and Elliot wasn’t prepared. Sure his parents has had some fights here and there but never one this explosive.
It scared him.
Sure enough little Mia picks it on too fast. Now with his parents arguing and his little sister crying he was overwhelmed, his chest pull tight as he carefully picks her up and start to rock her from side to side, shooing and shushing her as if a baby could understand him. He was so lost.
Then suddenly the screaming comes to an abrupted stop, through the wall he could hear his father panic rises, he was the one begging now. For what?-!
BANG-!
That was all he heard for him to immediately puts Mia down and rushed outside, there he saw his mom laying on the ground, blood gushing out from her head, brains sputtered everywhere, a shotgun lay near her hand, his father on his knees looking like he was the one who died instead. And to make everything worse one of her eyeball rolled to the foot of his feet, bumping into him and rolling away.
For a moment no sound was heard, partly from the gun short and another from shock. ‘’..’’ He couldn’t even say anything, all he could do was took a step back, then another step, then another until his back hits a cabinet. The feeling of something against his back made him jumped, a scared gasp escaping his lips. That was when his dad looks up, finally seeing his son.
‘’Elliot close your eyes!’’ He immediately rushed over, and Elliot stumbled back as he felt warm big hands hovering over his eyes, blocking him off of that horrible scene. And it was like seeing Elliot’s face made Mister Builder regain his senses and dialled 911.
The rest was a blur of everything. The court where his father stand infront of the judge, trying to convince everyone that it was a suicide and not his doing. Technically he wouldn’t even fight it if he didn’t have Elliot and Mia. They already lost their mother, they cannot loose their father too.
Eventually Mr. Builder won and they can proceed with the funeral. Though for Elliot it wasn’t any better. He hasn’t cried at all throughout the whole funeral. He felt broken, and now that he was robbed of his sense of pain he felt even worse. So he did what he done when his mom died too, throwing himself into a work routine that would literally kill anyone. Working every damn day, only taking break when someone reminds him, never taking a day off unless Mia or one of his friends reached out. Even then he still lives on, his dad notice of course and reminds him- even plead someday just for his son to take a damn rest. Not wanting his son to end up like.. him.
Well soon enough that working habit of his killed him, it was late at night, just right before closing a delivery order came in from a strange neighbourhood that show up glitched on the GPS. All his coworker told him to just cancel the order and refund the guy but Elliot would rather do anything else than sit in silence surrounded by his own thoughts and failure as a human being.
Bidding farewell to the worried Lulu he steps on his motorcycle helmet off, it feels much better and he doesn’t care about safety anyway-
The closer he got to the pin location the more the sky begin to distort, finally he reaches his destination at a lone house standing ontop of a bunch of dead grass, totally not creepy but he couldn’t care less.
Stepping off he shuts the engine down and began walking forward with just a slice of pepperoni pizza, one slice, that’s it. Allat trouble just for one measly slice.. Whateves
The moment he knocks everything turned to black, but just right before the darkness engulfs him completely he saw it. ‘IT’ the parasite, red top hat with a big letter S, red glows and codes surrounds it’s body.
After that day he has been stuck in the eternal hell with now some of the best comrade he could ever ask for, even if they could a little bit much, a little- nah a lot stupid, reckless, chaotic, but still so dear to him. Maybe that’s why he couldn’t open up, ended up creating an invisible wall that lets people in just enough for them to be comfortable around him but not enough for them to trust him.
Maybe it was his karma for cursing at the order or the karma of ignoring his sister it didn’t matter, he have a problem, big one. And he needs to blame someone, so he chose himself.
‘’Wake up.’’
He jolted awake, the voice, his own voice but it sounded much older, more tired and hollow rang inside his ears like a gunshot, THAT gunshot. He sat up slowly as an immense sense of dread looms over him.
‘’Oh Telamon… I’m so sorry…’’ He heaves out before he could even start the action, slapping himself on the face a few times got him to focus again. It didn’t hurt of course, it just felt like pat instead. He leans over to the bedside desk and rummages through the heaps of stuff he kept for ‘just in case’
And there it was again, that same old lighter, he found it in the kitchen one day and his blood just went cold, how does it knows? … He stops questioning things like that long time ago. It was just easier to not think.
The same things happen, his brain moving on auto mode and lit the lighter, watching the lights flickers for a few seconds, mesmerized by the way it dances before lifting up his left sleeves and putting the lit lighter under, smelling the cooked skin and feel that same old tingles that went numb overtime from how much he has done it.
‘’Elliot?’’
The sudden knocks and the sounds of his name being called shook him out of it, the lighter slipped from his hand onto the wooden floor… Thank telamon ‘it’ was a cheap bastard and the floor wasn’t actually made of wood but instead a cheap ass laminated floor. He breathes a sighs of relief knowing he didn’t caused a fire.
‘’Y- Yes! Hold on!’’ He calls out, his hands moving to swat at his skin to somewhat chase the burning smell of flesh away before harshly pulling down his sleeves.
‘’What’s wrong? Are you okay in there Elliot?’’
He could hear the other voices getting more impatient and worried and he knew he couldn’t stall for longer without being suspicious..
‘’Yeah! Just wait a sec!’’
He yells out, pleading the other would gives up and wait for him politely… Unless it was Chance, if it was Chance he’s cooked.
Quickly running to the bathroom he nearly tripped on a lone sock Chance left on the floor, he yelps before catching himself on the doorframe, ‘’fuck’’ he curses, lightly scolding himself and heavily berating Chance before turning on the tap and splashing some cool water on his face.
‘’Okay coming!’’ He ran back into the room, thankfully without tripping on anything this time.
The moment he unlocks the lock the door creaks open and he was met with a tall muscular blue hair looking soldier. ‘’Oh, hey Guest! What are you doing here?’’ He asked, tilting his head. Guest doesn’t visit him often, probably the least out of everyone. Not because he dislikes him, but more because out of everyone here he hides his problems the best. And Guest mostly visits when there’s something concerning him about the individual.
‘’Well, Chance keeps whining and I need your hel- What happens to your face? Are you okay?’’
Elliot jolts back, his hand immediately going up to his now probably still red cheeks. ‘’O- Oh this? W- well I was just exercising and practicing some of the defend moves you thought me before. I always turn red when I exercise haha…’’ He chuckles, scratching the back of his neck as if he was admitting something minorly embarrassing.
Guest nods like it made sense and continues on. ‘’Great! Anyway as I was saying Chance realllyy needs your help. Like asap.’’
Elliot cocks his head in confusion at the mention of Chance. Chance? The reckless gambler who never ask for serious help unless it’s for some joke?
‘’Is it really serious? What does he need?’’ He asked, his tone more worried than he ought it to be.
‘’W- well I don’t know- They just begged me to come get ya.’’ Guest sighs, scratching his own neck too.
‘’… Let’s just go, I don’t think they will appreciate waiting so long. I don’t want to deal with another tantrum.’’ He DOES want to deal with Chance’s tantrum, it’s somewhat endearing but he would rather eat his own flesh than admits that.
As the two walks back to the main cabin Elliot could only thank Guest for being so gullible and easy to fool.
.
Unbeknownst to him a 007n7n was standing just a few inches behind them, hearing and seeing everything. But like always he chose to be a coward and kept it himself only for him to suffer that consequences later on.
.
.
.
Also it turns out that Chance’s emergency was that he was incredibly hungry… Let’s just say someone has to sleep on the main cabin couch today and no one lends them a helping hand.