Work Text:
Title: Not Made For The Cold
Category: Hazbin Hotel
Pairing: T
Pairing: Alastor & Hotel Crew
Summary: A cold snap has happened in Hell which is a rarity, but it tends to happen. It also provides a rare sight for the Radio Demon to not be so focused on style or fashion, but more of a focus on functionality. If that means he has to be seen in a puffer winter jacket with two more jackets underneath just to stay warm than he will.
Disclaimer: I do not owe any rights to the Hazbin Hotel franchise. I have comment moderation on for the readers safety as for a while I had received comments that were just untrusted websites. I do not give authorization for my works to be placed into AI generated programs nor will I commission someone online to do artwork for my characters. I actually know people who I am close to in real life that can do art commissions for me and I trust them since I have known them for years. If you want to make an art over a scene or another story based on my work that’s perfectly fine. I will not be commissioning anyone to do one for me online when I know and trust people in my circle of friends who can do it for me.
Author’s Note: This is a work of fiction based on a plot bunny that appeared in my brain dealing with the Hazbin Hotel universe. I will possibly get some details wrong because I cannot get interested in Helluva Boss though I do know of it. I know, like most creators, that Viziepop has released some information on the characters on social media to be canon. I do not know all of those details nor do I want to, so if I get something wrong, please do not point it out in the comments.
~~Story Begins~~
It is rare that it happens in Hell, but there are times when Hell does freeze over. It was a blessing to many Sinners and Hellborn creatures as it provided them with a break from the heat. To those that had characteristics of insects, birds, reptiles, plants, or hibernation processes, this was literally hell as they were drowsy, sluggish, and really out of focus on what was in front of them.
To the hotel crew at the Hazbin Hotel, it was a time of bonding exercises of winter wonderland activities and an effort to push through the torture of the cold. Angel Dust even though he was a spider, he was laughing and having fun throwing snowballs at his best girl friend Cherri. His snowball fight partner was grumbling next to him as he made snowballs for him to throw, his wings while heavy and didn’t want to move too far away from the cat body did manage to knock some snowballs out of the way from Angel Dust.
“Husk! No fair, that's cheating!” Cherri’s snowball partner yelled in a slightly maniacal laugh as her tiny body kept her favorite knife (her second favorite knife actually, her first favorite knife is in a glass display in her room still covered in golden blood), moving and stabbing the incoming snowballs.
“You’re doing the same thing Niffty!” Husk shouted back.
“That’s because between the two of us we have two eyes while you have four eyes!” Cherri yelled. “We are already handicapped!”
“You have more than enough practice hitting your targets with your own explosive bombs with your one eye than we do!” Angel Dust yelled with a laugh.
Charlie was busy laughing in a child-like delight as she held her hands up to the air as she laid on the ground. “Vaggi! I need help! I don’t want to ruin my snow angel!”
Vaggi rolled her eye in fondness before spreading out her wings and flew into the air to lift her girlfriend up into the air and a few feet away from the snow angel. “Charlie, aren’t you tired of making snow angels? You’ve made fifteen of them now. Why don’t you start making some snowmen?”
“Dad and Baxter are already doing that, only making snow ducks and snow insects instead,” Charlie said with a pout. “OH! We can go ice skating! Let’s go!”
“Charlie, I don’t know how to ice skate!” Vaggi said, trying to stop her girlfriend from dragging her over to the frozen pond.
“That’s okay! I can totally teach you,” Charlie said.
Lucifer looked up with a bright smile on his face as he had just completed his twentieth snow rubber duck. It was moments like this that made Lucifer think being thrown out of Heaven was worth it because he remembers the weather always being perfect in Heaven. There were no moments where anyone could build snowducks or when it rains take the chance to jump into puddles to make the biggest splash. He looked over at his little family with a smile on his face before he noticed that the biggest pain in his side isn’t outside enjoying the cold weather with the rest of them.
“Hey, where’s the red guy?” Lucifer asked. “Shouldn’t he be out here bonding with the rest of us since Charlie said that she was making this today being a bonding exercise for the hotel family? He told Charlie that he would join and he’s not out here!”
“I believe he might have mentioned something about needing to finish up some paperwork for the hotel, doing some research for his broadcasts about this type of weather and activities that one could enjoy,” Baxter said.
Lucifer looked over at the group and hissed in displeasure at the thought of the stupid Bambi finding a loophole to get out of joining his darling daughter’s activities. Charlie looked adorable with her white turtleneck sweater with a red vest over the top of it while Vaggi leaned against her in a grey jacket with black buttons, the ends of the sleeves of the jacket was made with white fur that matched the white fur hat she wore. Angle was wearing a pink jacket that was zipped all the way up and had white mittens on all four of his hands while the bartender Dusk was wearing his usual red tie and black hat, it must be a benefit of being a furred cat demon hybrid that kept him warm. The explosive girl was perfectly fine with her usual Hell attire but that could also be related to the fact that she was constantly moving and never staying still long enough for the cold to bother her while Nancy was wearing a white coat that had a red sash tied around her waist which also held two more knives. Lucifer wondered where did the little cleaning lady keep all those knives before his eyes shifted over to his fellow snow animal maker buddy to see that he was still in his usual black lab coat.
“I think he’s-”
“I apologize for the delay in joining these…activities,” a muffled voice said through a radio filter with a bit of static. “I hope I wasn’t too late in joining. It took me longer than I thought it would to perfect making hot chocolate.”
Lucifer snapped his head over to look at the newcomer, a retort ready on his tongue about how no one would believe a shoddy lie like that but his brain quit functioning.
The final member (well not really final, there was one more that was missing. The snake guy but he got redeemed and that itself was a mystery to both heaven and hell),was standing there in the snow looking out of place. He wore a red knitted hat that had two tiny holes for his antlers to go through, a black scarf was wrapped tightly around his neck muffling his voice, he wore black leather gloves that was actually holding onto a tray with each of their customized mugs on them toppled with whipped cream that it was almost melting on the sides of the mugs, and his hooves were in black boots that actually went up to his knees. He would have been his infuriating stylish demon self that made Lucifer mad just upon seeing him if it wasn't for the dark red puffer style jacket that looked like it was two sizes too big.
“YOU MADE HOT CHOCOLATE!” Charlie shouted with so much excitement. “AND OH MY GOSH ARE THOSE UNICORN SPRINKLES ON ME!”
“What did you put them in?” Husk asked questionably walking over to grab his mug that didn’t have any sprinkles.
“Charlie has unicorn sprinkles, Vaggi just has whip cream with marshmallows, Angel has a peppermint stick in it,” Alastor said, handing each person that he’s naming what makes their hot chocolate different from the others. “Cherri has cinnamon peppermint sticks in it. Baxter just has whipped cream, Nifty’s has dark chocolate that is made to look like roach legs.”
“Hehehe! Bugs!” Nifty said, her mouth already covered in the whip cream.
“Husk, yours has a good shot or two of that irish whiskey mixed in, and Sire, yours has sprinkles, whipped cream, chocolate syrup, marshmallows, AND marshmallow ducks,” Alastor said.
“That’s awfully nice of you,” Vaggi said, eyeing the overly dressed demon with suspicion.
Lucifer gladly took his hot chocolate and licked some of his toppings off. “So, uh, what’s with the get-up? You over compresenting for something or-”
Radio static was heard in a screeching manner as Alastor stared at him.
“I’m not made for the cold, Sire,” Alastor said after taking a breath.
“You’re a deer,” Lucifer said. “Deers can live in the colder regions.”
“Dad, be nice,” Charlie said. “Al made us hot chocolate when he didn’t have too. It’s delicious too!”
“Would you believe me if I told you sir, that this is my first time seeing snow?” Alastor said.
“Yes, it’s quite a rarity in hell,” Lucifer said, “but it does happen in the mortal realm.”
“I am from the bayou, my Short King,” Alastor said. “I lived close to Lake Pontchartrain and the last time that my beloved city was hit with snow was in 1899. A few months before I was born actually, and even then the snowfall for that event did not create this much snow, or was it this blasted cold, or freeze any bodies of water that surrounded my city,”
“So this is a whole new experience for you?” Angel Dust asked. “That explains why you are so bundled up.”
“I was also a sickly child when growing up and unlike other humans, my body temperature runs a bit lower than normal so excuse me for taking precautions on making sure that if the hotel needs protections, I won’t be doing it with a runny nose, sneezing, coughing, or any other sick symptoms,” Alastor said.
“Is the hot chocolate your mother’s recipe as well?” Charlie asked, trying to steer the conversation to a more neutral ground. “It’s so good!”
“My grandfather’s actually,” Alastor said. “This was my first time making it.”
“King Roach can do anything!” Niffty said with glee.
“I just fine tune my skills, dear,” Alastor said.
Lucifer noticed a slight movement from Alastor and gasped at it. “No way! Are you seriously shivering right now, Bambi? Are you already cold?”
“No. I am freezing!” Alastor said with his voice heavily distorted with radio static and some screams. “I am not made for the cold, I never will be made for the cold. The natural heat of fire and brimstone is a comfort to me at just the right temperature.”
Alastor took a deep breath and closed his eyes.
“If you haven’t noticed, I don’t have my shadow with me either. They have decided that they are exempt from the hotel bonding exercises in the cold and have stayed inside the hotel by the fire to stay warm as they are shaking so hard I’m surprised the whole building isn’t moving with it,” Alastor said.
“Oh, that poor thing,” Charlie said with a frown. “Would you prefer if you were able to stay inside as well?”
“Hmmm and miss out on the entertainment of the winter activities? No. Will I partake in the winter activities? Perhaps. As long as it’s not something as frivolous that are in those holiday movies everyone seems to love,” Alastor said. “I will not fall in love or have emotions meeting some random person while ice skating or whatever nonsense is going to happen.”
“Aww so Bambi does want to play in the reindeer games,” Lucifer said with a smile before letting out a little sound when he saw the duck marshmallows.
“Hehehe I call King Roach!” Niffty yelled before Lucifer felt a snowball hit him in the face.
Lucifer shook his head and stared as Niffty climbed up Alastor’s shoulder just as one of his black tendril threw another snowball aimed at Husk.
“Oh-ho!” Angel Dust said laughing. “That’s playing dirty Smiles!”
“It’s so on!” Vaggi said also getting hit with a snowball. “Sire, Charlie, you’re with me! Take cover!”
“Cherri and Angel, you’re with me!” Husk said, grabbing one of their arms and flew the two Sinners back to their snow fort they had made earlier.
“Baxter, you’re with us!” Niffty said laughing as Alastor went into the shadows with the two remaining members of the hotel crew and hid behind some trees where there was already a stockpile of snowballs made.
“Keep us supplied with snowballs,” Alastor said.
“Bellhop, I’ll get you for that!” Lucifer yelled as snowballs went flying in three directions with laughter coming from most of the ragtag group.
“It’s hotelier!”