Work Text:
Panacea
noun
a universal solution or remedy, often idealized as a cure for all problems or difficulties.
“some believe fresh air is a panacea for energy, but others still need coffee”
+++
The case had taken a darker turn than expected. What was supposed to be a missing persons case turned into a set up, something fake to lure members of the Armed Detective Agency in.
Kunikida and Dazai had been assigned, and they were lucky that was the case. The two had been partners for years, and were able to understand each other with a simple nod. Usually, their enemies didn’t stand a chance.
Even so, the two were unprepared for a fight.
Kunikida had suffered an injury to the head, and he was bleeding quite a bit. It made him lightheaded and woozy, but he had to endure it.
Dazai was still fighting, still needed him. The woman had some sort of strength enhancing ability, something that was confirmed when such a small weapon had caused such a painful injury. It was a cylindrical object covered in spikes, and she had thrown it into the side of his head. The force of it had knocked his glasses off, shattering them. The wound pulsed, and it felt as though his head was being split in two. But despite all that, he stood.
He had been too late, though.
“Dazai!” He called out, lunging forward. But his legs were too shaky, and he could hardly see without his glasses. All he could make out was the woman pulling Dazai through a doorframe much taller than himself, and then a loud CRACK before he hit the ground.
Suddenly, Kunikida found the strength to stand properly. ‘Adrenaline,’ he thought in the back of his mind. Behind the woman, two doors burst open. Back up had arrived.
He didn’t waste time informing them of the situation, immediately running to find help. In his arms, he held Dazai. He was still breathing, his heart was still beating, and Kunikida couldn’t help but feel lucky that it wasn’t worse.
‘I just need to find Yosano-sensei… she’ll be able to heal both of him. Us.’ Kunikida repeated those words in his head as he searched for the woman. It was difficult – his glasses had shattered, and blood was starting to drip into his eyes. He didn’t dare reach his arm up to wipe it away, not wanting to risk any further injury to Dazai.
He finally spotted the woman – ‘That is her, right? She seems to have purple hair.’ – and called out to her. The blob of white and purple spun in their direction, and hesitated for only a second before running towards them.
“Yosano-sensei–” He choked out, his injuries catching up to him now that he knew they’d be safe.
“What happened?” She sounded exasperated, but there was a trace of concern in her tone. Why? She’s here now, so it’ll be fine.
“The would be missing person ambushed us,” Kunikida explained quickly, “She hit me on the head with… something. I’m not sure what.” His head felt fuzzy and light. Usually, he had no trouble remembering such important details. “And Dazai… she hit his head into a doorframe, and his neck went back very suddenly. He passed out right after.” Yosano’s concern immediately increased, and now Kunikida could even see it on the blurry details of her face.
‘Whiplash or concussions would be the best case, and a brain bleed the worst.’ Kunikida didn’t enjoy thinking that way, but he had to plan for every possibility. Of course, it wouldn’t really matter. ‘Yosano will heal him.’ Still, his head pounded, and he couldn’t help but feel he was forgetting something.
“You’ve lost a lot of blood.” Yosano said, trying to hide the shaking in her voice. “Put Dazai down so I can heal you.” She began to take the man from Kunikida’s arms, and his own concern and confusion grew.
“I’ll be okay if I wait a few minutes – start with him.” His tone was pleading. He needed to make sure Dazai was okay. Despite knowing he would be, he couldn’t shake the nagging feeling.
“Kunikida, that will take far too long.” What? “And there’s no guarantee…” Her voice was stern now, though there was a hint of pity as well. Maybe even sadness.
“What do you mean?” He asked, still gripping onto Dazai.
“This injury is far worse than the one he usually sustains, and I cannot be sure that I’ll be able to heal–”
“But your ability!” Kunikida interrupted, swaying where he stood.
“Kunikida.” She began, finally taking Dazai from the other man’s arms and setting him down. “That injury is worse than I thought…” She placed her hand on Kunikida’s head, and he winced as her fingers dug into the wound. His head pounded harder, and suddenly all he could think about, all he could feel, was the injury. “My ability cannot heal Dazai, Kunikida.”
That’s right. Yosano, their cure-all, the agency’s panacea, had one person she could not heal. It was almost never a problem. Dazai generally avoided anything too serious, unless it was self-inflicted. But even then, it could be fixed. After all, the man had no plans of dying in pain.
But now, thanks to Kunikida, that very well might be the case. He lowered himself down to his partner, ignoring Yosano, and tried to examine the man himself. His breathing was ragged and shallow, and there was a nasty bruise forming on his forehead. Kunikida placed his fingers on Dazai’s lower neck, desperately trying to feel a pulse. There was almost nothing.
“No..” He choked out. Tears from his eyes, and his head pounded harder. “Not like this..! You can’t–” His breath hitched, and he couldn’t force any more words out. The last thing he remembered was scooping Dazai into his arms and holding him tight.
+++
He awoke back in Yosano’s office. It took him a moment to remember the details of what had happened, but when he did he sat up in a panic. Yosano startled from the other side of the room, having only been alerted to his state by the sudden sound of gasping and Kunikida’s attempts to stand.
“You’re awake!” She said, walking over to his bed, an amused look on her face. Kunikida didn’t find the situation amusing in the slightest.
“Where is Dazai?” He demanded, unable to keep the worry and desperation out of his voice. Despite this, Yosano just laughed.
“He’s perfectly fine! Well, not perfectly. He is mildly concussed, and will be in a neck brace for a while.” That didn’t make any sense. Yosano seemed to guess what Kunikida was thinking. “He has whiplash,” She explained, but that still didn’t make Kunikida any less confused. “Honestly, you had me so worried for no reason!”
“But–” He could have sworn the injuries were worse, but he couldn’t remember why. There was something… Right! “His pulse! It was almost nonexistent!”
Yosano had to stifle a laugh behind her hand. “Kunikida… You check the pulse up here.” She tapped the section of her neck right below her jaw. Kunikida nodded, he already knew that. “You were checking here.” Her fingers moved down, almost at the space between her neck and shoulder.
“I see…” Kunikida said, looking away in shame. “But that woman was extremely strong,” He continued, gesturing towards his own head, “When I saw how she… I was certain he would have been worse off…”
“Her ability enhanced her strength, remember? With Dazai, she was just average.” Yosano explained. “Usually, he wouldn’t have even gotten injured. But, I guess he was… distracted.” She said, giving Kunikida a look. “It was sweet how worried you were.” She teased, walking away to grab the supplies needed for a checkup.
It was pathetic, was what it was. He had allowed his panic to override his ability to think, and had made a fool of himself in the process. Honestly, he was just glad Dazai hadn’t been awake for the whole ordeal.
“...You said he was concussed, right? Shouldn’t he be in here, then?” Kunikida asked, and Yosano paused her prodding. She looked annoyed.
“Yes, he should be. But he refused, and I can’t force him to stay.” She sighed, and Kunikida understood her frustration far too well. The most infuriating part about being in Dazai’s life was caring about him. “..He doesn’t seem to do well in hospitals, or anything adjacent." She explained, her voice melting into something more solemn.
Kunikida hadn’t known that before, but the information didn’t necessarily surprise him. Perhaps he’d be able to talk with Dazai about it at some point. For now, though, he had other concerns.
“If he isn’t here, then where is he..?”
“Surprisingly, he insisted on coming into the office.”
“What!? He did!?” The shock briefly distracted the man, and he fell back into his sheets. Dazai Osamu, willingly coming into work, despite having a perfectly good reason not to! If he was always like this, maybe Kunikida wouldn’t look so much older than him…
“Of course, I banned him from doing any actual work.” She explained further. Oh well… it was always too good to be true. “With the concussion and everything, it wouldn’t be good for him to look at a screen or write reports, even if he could.”
“Then… Why is he here?” He was hesitant to ask, not wanting to somehow jinx Dazai’s supposed newly found work ethic. Yosano just shrugged, though her eyes told Kunikida she knew the answer.
At that moment, a knock was heard, and the door swung open before anyone could reply.
“Kunikida-kuuun!” Dazai yelled as he entered the room, wincing slightly at the sound of his own voice. “You’re finally awake! I was starting to think you were just trying to get out of work or something!”
Kunikida didn’t take the bait. “How are you feeling?” He asked, taking note of the brace around Dazai’s neck. He looked tired, and the bruise was still apparent on his forehead. He had to resist the urge to reach out. He had already made a fool of himself once this week.
“Horrible.” Dazai replied, though there were a few seconds of hesitation. He really was concussed, then. “This neck brace makes me look ridiculous!” He never could take anything seriously, could he?
“And your head?” Kunikida sat up a little more, now making direct eye contact with Dazai. Before he could reply with another non-answer, Yosano interjected.
“Since you’re already here, why don’t you let me give you a check-up, hm?” She said, and Dazai shook his head.
“I think Atsushi-kun is calling for me, I should–”
“I insist.”
+++
She had forced the two to go home after their check-up’s, and even though he had supposedly fought hard to be here in the first place, Dazai didn’t argue with her. He dragged Kunikida – who was perfectly fine, thanks to Yosano’s ability – out of the building, insisting a day off wouldn’t kill him.
“If you work every day, you’ll die young from the stress Kunikida-kun!” Dazai said, his voice as loud and irritating as usual. For once, it seemed Kunikida wasn’t the only one who felt that way, as Dazai kept wincing at the sound of his own voice.
“Lower your voice, bastard!” Kunikida yelled, immediately realizing the irony of the situation and softening his own tone. “You’re going to make your head worse.” He said, allowing some of his concern to seep through. “...And there’s no need to put a show on right now.” The last sentence was quieter, and he had hesitated to even say it. Over time, he had learned that showing too much concern for Dazai right off the bat was a sure-fire way to make things worse.
He didn’t reply, but he didn’t seem upset. His expression relaxed a little, and he looked tired. Even so, it was far nicer to look at than the too-wide smile he constantly had plastered on his face.
Kunikida wanted to ask why he had refused to stay overnight for observation, but decided against it. He wouldn’t get a straight answer anyway.
“If this is going to be the only time you refuse to indulge in medical treatments,” he started, gesturing towards the wasteful amounts of bandages covering Dazai’s skin, “You should at least have someone with you. With a concussion, there are a lot of simpler tasks you should not be doing yourself right now.”
A grin formed on Dazai’s face, the look that often ended with Kunikida regretting his words. “Is Kunikida-kun offering to take care of me?” He asked, grabbing onto Kunikida’s arm. “How kind!”
He thought about it for a moment before answering. “...I suppose I am.” He could rearrange his schedule for a few weeks. It wouldn’t be ideal, but definitely preferred it over Dazai essentially neglecting himself until he was better. For some reason, Dazai seemed slightly surprised by this answer. Had he thought Kunikida would ever say no? “I know you won’t care for yourself properly, so for at least the next few weeks, you should stay in my dorm. That way, if you need anything you can just ask me.” He explained matter-of-factly.
“I- well, I mean, if you insist.” Dazai said, stumbling over his words. That never happened. Kunikida was glad he had offered, even mild concussions could have lasting effects if not treated properly.
+++
Kunikida prepared dinner for the two while Dazai sat on the couch, an ice pack wedged between the back of his neck and the brace. They had brought some essentials over from Dazai’s own dorm, but the man didn’t seem to own much, so it didn’t take long.
“After we eat, you should go to sleep. You need rest.” Kunikida said, glancing over at where Dazai sat, staring at the wall. He could watch TV or read, and going to sleep too early wouldn’t be good for him. So he just sat there, keeping Kunikida company while he cooked. It felt nice, having someone else in his dorm, even if they weren’t talking much. Just the presence of another was comforting.
He finished cooking and set two plates of food down onto the table. Dazai joined him, and the two began eating.
“You should teach me how to cook like this, Kunikida-kun.”
“I’d rather not let you anywhere near my kitchen.”
Dazai whined, but they continued their dinner. He ate slowly, and Kunikida couldn’t decide whether it was because he struggled to hold his chopsticks, or because he wasn’t used to eating this much. Kunikida had tried to give him a smaller portion, having made note of how little he ate a while ago, but maybe it was still too much…
“Would you like a fork instead?” Kunikida offered, watching the man struggle. It was unusual for him. He must be uncomfortable, being unable to do things that usually came with ease. He shook his head, but after struggling for a few more moments gave in.
“You will take the bed, of course. I’ll be on the couch.” Kunikida said while he cleaned their dishes.
“Eh? Don’t be a prude Kunikida-kun! We can share the bed~!” Dazai teased, and the other man felt his face heat up. The offer was tempting, though he didn’t want to think about why, but illogical. If they shared the bed, he risked injuring Dazai somehow during the night.
“It’s safer if you have the bed to yourself. I don’t want to risk any more injuries.” He explained, and Dazai’s face dropped a little.
“You should take the bed, then. You’re being too generous.” He said, looking away from Kunikida.
“No, the couch is not an ideal place to sleep when dealing with a neck injury. I’ll be fine.” He assured. Dazai looked like he wanted to put up more of a fight, but decided against it. Maybe it was the concussion slowing his brain down. But Kunikida hoped it was just him learning to accept help.
He led Dazai to his room.
“Like I said, I’ll be on the couch if you need anything, okay?” Kunikida said after helping Dazai change and making sure he had settled into the bed. He turned the lights off and prepared to leave the room, but the sound of the other man’s voice stopped him. “Hm?” He walked back over to the bed, worried that something was wrong. “What is it?”
Dazai stayed silent for a moment, as if he was struggling with the words.
“Thank you, Kunikida.” He said finally, his hand resting lightly on the other’s. The warmth returned to Kunikida’s face, and a feeling of happiness and satisfaction settled within him. This was Dazai accepting his help. A moment of vulnerability, a show of trust somewhere outside of a battlefield.
“It’s no trouble at all.” Kunikida said softly, moving his other hand to Dazai’s shoulders and gently coaxing him into a lying position. He allowed the touch to linger for a moment, wanting to show Dazai that he truly wasn’t a burden. That he could reach out for help at any time.
He leaned forward and placed an almost non-existent kiss to the top of Dazai’s head. It was an awkward angle, but he didn’t want to risk putting pressure on the bruise across the other man’s forehead. “Sleep well, Dazai.” He said softly, before leaving the room.
A warmth spread through Dazai’s body, and he found himself drifting to sleep much faster than usual.
It wasn’t a cure-all, or a panacea like Yosano’s ability. On its own, he wasn’t foolish enough to think it’d fix much of anything. Still, as his headache subdued, Dazai couldn’t help but think that love and affection really did help ease his pains.