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Merlin blew out the last candle no more than ten minutes ago when there's a timid knock on Arthur's door. Lovely. It's not like Arthur needed a good night's sleep anyway.
But (despite Arthur's teasing) Merlin's always running around doing this or that, keeping up with chores and whatever strange plans he concocts on his own time. He wouldn't visit Arthur just because, certainly not at a time like this.
"Who is it?" he asks, just to confirm.
"It's Merlin."
Arthur sighs and sits up. Just as he thought. "Come in, Merlin."
The door opens slowly. Merlin closes it behind him. His eyes flit around the room nervously and finally settle on Arthur. There's something in them that Arhtur doesn't like, something agitated and scared. Considering the events of the day, he's not surprised, but somehow seeing it written on Merlin's face startles him nonetheless.
"What is it?" he asks, trying not to sound too prattish.
Merlin nods jerkily. "Right, well, I wanted to ask if I could maybe sleep here tonight. I can get some blankets and I'll sleep on the floor, it's just-" He scratches behind his ear and chuckles breathily, but it doesn't hide his agitation. "Gaius' chambers are all - searched, and messy, and you know, the knights broke a lot of stuff and I just - I can't - be there." His smile is sheepish but his eyes are pleading and desperate and he spent hours in the dungeons and now his mentor is there and his chambers are as wrecked as Merlin's life is right now.
"Of course," Arthur says softly.
"Thank you," Merlin breathes.
The floor can't be very comfortable. Arthur does feel a bit sorry for Merlin, but it was his own suggestion. Anyway, it's no excuse to be keeping Arthur awake.
"Merlin," he says when he has reached his breaking point. There's only so much almost falling asleep before being awoken by the sound of Merin's tossing a man can take.
"Yeah?"
"I can hear you tossing and turning from here. Quit it."
"Yes, sire," Merlin says very quietly.
Where first there was tossing, now there is sobbing. Small, controlled, cut off, but unmistakably sobbing. Arthur feels shame prickle underneath his skin for his thoughtlessness.
"Merlin?" he asks carefully.
A sniffle. "Yes?"
Arthur hesitates, but well, it's too late to change course now. "Are you alright?"
Merlin's response is chipper with a broken voice. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" Alright, stupid question. Arthur curses himself internally. He's hardly unaffected by the accusation against Gaius himself and while he's known the physician all his life, Merlin seems closer to him than Arthur ever was. Arthur can't even bring himself to call Merlin a girl for crying.
"I'm sorry about Gaius," he offers. "Truly."
"I know."
"If there was anything I could do…"
"Yeah, I know. You can't disobey your father like that. I know. It's not your fault." There's another barely concealed sob in his voice and Arthur aches.
"Shall I at least get someone to get you a mattress?" Arthur asks awkwardly. It's all he can do but not nearly enough and the question feels almost mocking when he hears it.
"And have some poor servant drag it through the castle? No, thanks," he says unsteadily. Arthur hears him shift again. He sits up so he can see Merlin on the other side of the room properly. He's shaking minutely, but it's enough.
"Merlin, just tell me what I can do and I'll do it," he says, suddenly the pleading one. He can't stand to see the normally so cheerful boy wracked with silent sobs.
Merlin doesn't respond. He's still lying on Arthur's floor and the image of him is making Arthur feel sick.
"You're not sleeping on the floor, Merlin." It's an order, sort of, but it feels more like a plea. A wish to lighten Merlin's burden even if he refuses to ask. Arthur's voice is soft and ever so slightly disbelieving when he says it - how was he ever going to allow this? - and Merlin turns around to look at him. Arthur can't see his face but the moonlight shines on his own through the windows and he feels strangely vulnerable.
"I don't want to go back to Gaius' chambers," Merlin whispers.
"You don't have to. Come on, the bed's big enough for two."
Merlin can't seem to stop crying. At least he's more comfortable now, Arthur supposes.
He looks pitiful, curled up with his back to Arthur. There's so much pain coursing through him, almost more than Arthur would expect. But then, Merlin's always been a man of feeling.
Slowly, Arthur puts a hand on Merlin's shoulder. Merlin startles, but doesn't move away, so Arthur gently pulls him around so he can finally see his tear-stained face.
He doesn't know what comes over him, but suddenly, he's cupping Merlin's cheek and wiping his tears. "You're not alone, Merlin," he breathes. Merlin blinks rapidly and relaxes ever so slightly. A hand comes up to cover Arthur's, gripping onto it with a fervour that borders on desperation. A wounded sound escapes Merlin. As if by instinct, Arthur removes his hand from Merlin's cheek and wraps an arm around his side and pulls him close so Merlin is held safely against him, their foreheads touching.
"Whatever happens, whatever Aredian's investigations reveal, you won't be facing it alone," he repeats. Merlin's hand comes up to Arthur's cheek, a mirror of his earlier gesture. He exhales shakily.
A very small smile lifts the corners of Merlin's lips, though his eyes remain wet and dark and unreadable. His thumb caresses Arthur's cheek.
As they watch each other closely, Merlin's eyes finally begin to flutter closed and his hand falls away to instead embrace Arthur. Arthur pulls him closer and Merlin goes willingly, nestling into him and tucking his head under Arthur's chin.
Merlin finds Arthur's hand and grasps it and intertwines their fingers and for a second he squeezes so tightly it hurts before he relaxes his hold. "Thank you," he whispers.