Work Text:
Whose Charting What?!
The first time that Hank finds a chart, he figures it must have been a student who accidentally left it behind from health class. It was half finished and scribbled on, Hank had tossed it out not thinking about it until the fifth chart that he’s come across in the last few months. It read ‘Property of Wade W. Wilson-Howlett’ and was a chart filled with different colored hearts on it. Hank pinched the bridge of his nose as he debated filling his curiosity and taking a proper look at Wade’s chart.
Curiosity won and Hank regretted it immediately, “Stars and garters!” He whispers to himself as he re-reads the chart.
Property of Wade W. Wilson-Howlett ❤️💛
Mouth| ❤️ | ❤️ | ❤️ | 💔 |
Tits | ❤️ | 💛 |
Cock | ❤️ | ❤️ | 💙 | 💔 |
Ass | ❤️ | ❤️ | ❤️ | ❤️ | ❤️ | 💛 | ❤️ | ❤️ | ❤️ | 💛 | 💙 | 💔 |
Hank really didn’t want to know what each heart meant. He just knew that he’ll need to have that full conversation with Wade about his inappropriate sticker use.
—
“Stars and garters!” Hank yelled in his office, thankful he had it soundproof after the third incident involving the infamous couple for constant visits to MR. “Why the fuck are Charles and Erik now having stickers on themselves too?” Hank groaned as he considered his options about how to address this or if he should address it.
“Here Wade, I believe you dropped this,” Hank said as he slid over a blank piece of paper to Wade. They were sitting across from each other outside on a sunny day in the spring. Hank had been waiting for a chance to catch Wade alone to give him back his chart, Wade took it and flipped it over.
“Oh! Thank you for finding it!” Wade said excitedly, grinning at Hank, “Wolvie was worried one of the students had found it.” Wade chuckled nervously as he stashed it into his Hello Kitty backpack.
Hank remembered having to cut Wade off from explaining the rating system, he really didn’t want to know that much about Wade’s and Logan’s sex life. Hank sighed as he considered his options. His fur felt greyer by the minute, “Should I just start leaving blank copies of empty boxes, they can fill it out and add their own stickers to it?”
Hank really didn’t know what he was going to do with them. Hank sent an email to Ororo checking about his PTO.