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It was difficult to keep count on how many worlds Kolanii had gone to within these 100 days. It's even more difficult to keep track of the different versions of himself he'd met in the worlds beyond the portals. Widelanii, Yeehawlanii, Mincedlanii. RGBlanii… they're all confusing concepts. How did they even come to be? What was the thought process behind a minced version of himself?
What's interesting was how every variant had their own version of Paul as well. Every Paul variant Kolanii met felt cooler than his own until he realized how important his Paul was to him.
Today, the two had gone to the world belonging to Twofacedlanii. It never sat right with Kolanii how Twoface looked slightly similar to Nameless. It's even worse because of the nightmares he keeps having about Nameless. Their split appearance really gets his paranoia riled up.
"Kolanii? Did you see something, or…?"
Paul's hand rested on his shoulder, making him flinch in surprise. He hadn't realized He'd been staring at a lone hill in the distance this entire time. It was getting dark, and the two were on their way back to the portal to go back to their team.
"I'm not sure. I feel like we're being watched." Kolanii said, hesitating to take his eyes away from the clearly harmless hill. His breathing was slow and limited, his ears twitching in discomfort when his eyes caught another shadow nearby. The sharp light of the citadel towers in this world beamed across the horizon, reminding the two that they didn't belong here. They didn't belong in their own world anymore, so does it really matter?
Paul's gears whirred when they turned their head to get a good look around the area in an attempt to find a truth to comfort Kolanii, and to get rid of their own concerns.
"I don't think so, Kolanii. Maybe it's just the citadel towers throwing you off?"
"No, it's not that. Not the guards, not the towers… its him. It has to be." Kolanii said, bearing his sharp teeth under his mask. Paul's head turned to Kolanii, the expression on their screen lowering to show concern.
"That's… unlikely." They didn't want to lie. There was a part in their sentient mind that thought maybe, just maybe, Kolanii was right. Nameless very well could be watching them, following their every step unnoticed.
A subtle growl escaped Kolanii's mouth as he pulled on his sleeves in frustration. With his eyes lowered to the ground, he said "We just have to get out of here. It's useless being in a world he's already got. C'mon, let's go."
His hand grabbed Paul's cold, metal wrist as he began to quickened his steps towards the portals. They were pretty far away from the towers, so there was no need to hide from guards for now. Paul let themselves be dragged along by Kolanii, staying closely behind him.
"Y’know, Kolanii…" Paul muttered, his free hand reaching to grab a dandelion from the grassy meadow as they walked. "I think you're just paranoid."
Kolanii stopped in his steps so fast, Paul couldn't stop on time and bumped into his back. He didn't speak to reply, but Paul felt his grip around his wrist tighten before he let go, pushing their hand away furiously.
Paul's interface dinged as their expression changed into a worried look. They wanted to speak, but figured staying silent was a better reply.
Kolanii, with a quickened breath and trembling hands, kept his face turned away from Paul. After moments of silence, he finally spoke in a frantic panic.
"No… It's not- It's not paranoia. I know it. He's here somewhere and he knows were here. I swear I saw him on that hill- that couldn't have been a shadow! It looked too real to be one. I saw his eyes. I saw them looking-… Paul, I saw him following us. And I don't trust that twofaced version of me. He looks too much like Nameless and that's terrifying! I don't know why he's- following us.. maybe for the key? Maybe? I-"
His words scrambled into a defeated gasp in the end, shoving his face in his hands to calm himself down. Paul simply watched him, processing ways to help their human. They waited in silence to see if he had more to say, and he did.
"Look.. I don't know… I don't know what's happening to me. It's just that- I saw him in a nightmare that didn't feel like a nightmare one time- and I haven't felt the same since. I know- I know he's out there and I know he doesn't like me-"
"Kolanii."
"He has to be here somewhere, just following us- to get revenge? I admit, trapping him in the nether was bad but its not that serious, is it?"
"Kolanii-"
"And I don't know why he's was so against me in that dream?! Did he know I was following him to catch him? If so, how did he know that-"
"KOLANII."
Kolanii finally stopped speaking endlessly. He caught his breath, sweat trailing down his forehead from the stressed thoughts and his ears that were perked up in alert suddenly dropped down, flopping against his white hair. He didn't realize how hard he was trembling and breathing until he looked down to see his hands struggling to stay still as if they're cold beyond saving.
He looked at Paul, who looked back at him with a singular expression that read Kolanii like a book.
The wind was loud around them, swiftly braiding through in-between them and making their cloaks sway along. Paul's hands reached forward, holding the palms outward for Kolanii to hold.
His eyes lowered to their hands and sighed, gently putting his own on the metal surface. Letting his mildly warm and trembling hands rest on Paul's, Kolanii's breathing finally calmed down.
"It's going to be okay, Kolanii."
Kolanii tightened his eyes, forcing tears to stay put instead of rolling down. Taking two steps towards Paul, he lifted his face to look at the robot, his dark eyes shimmering in the reflection of the computer interface.
With a small ding, the expression in Paul's screen changed into a soft smile. Kolanii, who's mind had been racing faster than a Redstone clock, finally settled.
"I will be there for you when you need me." Paul said, nodding his computer head gently.
Kolanii felt tired, he felt exhausted.
His head fell forward, his forehead hitting the metal on Paul's chest, it's sound dampened by his hair. Paul stood unmoving, holding Kolanii's hands as his head rested on their chest. He didn't move closer, he didn't hug Paul, he didn't move again. He just stood with his head on their chest, hands tightly holding Paul's and tears finally falling from his eyes onto the grass below them. He didn't sniffle, he didn't make a sound to reveal his tears.
Eventually, with a cracked voice he said,
"Thank you."
Kolanii closed his eyes tighter, lingering on the moment a little longer. The ambient sound of Paul's gears turning and beeping calmed him unexpectedly easily.
"That's cute."
Kolanii's eyes burst open when he heard a voice, stepping back in a flurry. He looked in front of him, expecting to see Paul right where they were. Instead, he was met with nothing but a dark mist. No hands, no robot, just nothing. He swung his head around until he saw a pair of familiar eyes.
"You-" Kolanii lost his words when he felt his lungs failed to catch up with his heart.
It was nameless, standing like a shadowy figure in the distance.
"What did you to? Where- What-" Kolanii tried to control himself, but his body felt lighter.
It was a dream. It was a nightmare. It was a hallucination.
"No- No it's not real. You're just a hallucination. This isn't- It's not real." He said, breathing to regulate his mind. Nameless didn't reply, he didn't react at all.
In this silence, Kolanii stepped back, turning around to walk towards the portal he'd planned to go to.
He wanted to ask where Paul was.
"You really can't live without that guy, can you?" Nameless said from a distance as if he knew what Kolanii was thinking, making Kolanii clench his fists. He didn't stop his pace, but his anger stormed in his chest. It annoyed him that Nameless was right.
He didn't look back, didn't listen to the sounds around him, and he kept walking. He felt the black shadow of Nameless linger around him, following his steps just like he was there in reality.
"Hey, where you going?" Nameless whispered right in Kolanii's ear, making him flinch around in anger. He swung his bare fist around, hoping to hit the nuisance. But he realized Nameless either had very good dodging skills, or he didn't hit a physical body at all.
"LEAVE ME ALONE." He yelled, turning around with clenched fists and focused eyes to scan for the voice. "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU."
Nameless's laughter echoed around him, disorienting the perception of his surroundings.
"I'll leave you alone… if you leave me alone."
Kolanii's breathing slowed again to process the offer Nameless had just made.
It felt like a fair deal. The whole reason he'd been suffering is because he isn't giving up on finding where Nameless keeps the pyramids and why he took them in the first place.
At this point, he was desperate.
"Show yourself to me. Then we'll talk."
Just a split second later, Nameless stood behind Kolanii, close enough for him to notice his presence and turn to face him. Kolanii didn't flinch or act surprised, which was unexpected.
"Y'know, I still don't know how you keep seeing me in dreams. You really need to let go."
"It's not- What?" Kolanii stuttered in confusion.
"Come on, you're always thinking about me to the point you see me in your dreams. It's concerning." Nameless said, a grin audible in his voice.
Kolanii furrowed his eyebrows, praying his mask hid his embarrassed face well.
"It's not like that- That's not the point. I need you to stop torturing me. I'm just trying to live."
"Well why do you keep chasing after me? You can just go back to your world and rebuild your base if you love it so much." Nameless crossed his arms. Kolanii noticed his body wasn't fully physical. There were traces of black mist that followed his movements, making him have a blurry silhouette.
"I can't. The bloody citadel took over everything I have and I can't do anything there."
"Not my problem."
Kolanii's jaw dropped at the response.
"Not your problem? YOU CAUSED IT, YOU UGLY-"
Nameless saw Kolanii's fist clench and before he knew it, he swung it again to punch him with all his might. Unfortunately, his fist missed and Nameless dodged back, watching Kolanii stumble.
"Whoa, whoa! Hold your horses… Let's not get violent, shall we?"
Kolanii huffed and puffed, his head dropped to the ground as he pushed his sleeves up higher than they were. "I don't listen to you, idiot." He said, lifting his head and charging forward with a more confident attack. Nameless pushed his arms from his cloak, reaching forward to block Kolanii's hit by grabbing his fists and pushing them to the side. Kolanii stumbled aside, his hands locked by the others grip, too tight to break away.
"I said let's not get violent." Nameless muttered, tightening his grip on Kolanii's fists. Kolanii simply stared at him, eyes full of rage. He dropped his head, moving it near his shoulder to pull down his white mask as swiftly as he could without hands. When the mask fell from his chin, he looked back up at Nameless, bearing his teeth with an insatiable urge to lunge forward and bite.
Nameless raised one eyebrow in amusement, a snicker escaping from his hidden smirk when Kolanii growled.
"Oh yeah, like that would work? I've been through worse-" His words were interrupted by Kolanii leapt forward, his teeth apart to bite down on whatever he could grab. Nameless, for once, stepped back in defeat, letting go of Kolanii's hands to move far enough away from his attack.
Taking advantage of the other's moment of vulnerability, Kolanii ran forward, fast enough to make Nameless trip and fall on the ground. Kolanii fell to his knees, lowering to pin the other down with his clawed hands and sharp sneer. When he was sure of having Nameless pinned down with no way to break away, he seethed over him.
"You can take all the emerald bases you want and put it anywhere you like but you don't get to ruin my entire life by leading me on in an annoying chase, taking away the things I have left, and torturing me and countless others just because you are an entitled thief that loves being mysterious. I'll say this ; I will never, EVER, stop chasing you until you give me answers. Until you give me back everything you took from me, until you stop this stupid game, until you are dead and gone NEVER TO COME BACK. YOU HEAR ME?"
His snarling voice lingered on as Nameless kept looking up at him with enthralled eyes under furrowed eyebrows. He waited until Kolanii's raging breaths slowed down to answer.
"I guess that means you don't accept the offer."
Kolanii's eyes narrowed more than before. "Yeah, and I don't care if I keep seeing you in my dreams. That's the least of my concerns."
Nameless hummed, tilting his head. "Hard to say with the paranoid episodes you keep having. Are you sure you want it to keep happening?"
"Yes. I've got people that care about me. It's fine."
Kolanii's grip around Nameless's arms tightened when he heard him chuckle as a response. "Jealous of me having people that care?"
"Quite the opposite. I think it's rather shameful."
Kolanii growled once again, pushing himself off of Nameless in frustration. "You're crazy."
Nameless laughed again as he sat up, brushing off the grass from his clothes. "That's a harsh word."
Kolanii didn't reply, keeping his face turned towards the light of a portal behind the dark fog. It was then he remembered he was in fact still dreaming. Nameless didn't want to attack in return, in his mind, it was useless to do so.
"Wake me up." Kolanii said, his eyes never leaving the light in the distance. "Right now."
Nameless simply stood behind him, glancing at his ears twitching uncomfortably. He didn't know what to do exactly. The last time Kolanii returned to reality was when he passed out, so it was maybe that, he thought.
"Did you not hear what I said? Wake me up." Kolanii demanded, turning head slightly to make his eyes visible to the person behind him. "I'm in a dream, aren't I? So that means I can just pass out and wake up. C'mon, do it."
Nameless walked closer, standing only mere inches behind Kolanii. He leaned forward, making sure he was close enough to hear his heartbeat. It was nonexistent as he expected. Why would the heart beat in a dream?
Leaning back up, he put his hand next to Kolanii's face, fingers clenching beside his ear. Kolanii didn't budge at all.
"See you around."
"Oh, you will."
With a blow to the side of his head with a sharp swing of Nameless's hand, Kolanii's vision went black. The black void engulfed his vision, transforming into a starry night sky with more colors than there normally is before going dark again.
He got what he wished for. He woke up, feeling everything bitterly realistic against his skin. His head was laying on someone else's lap, and it didn't take long to deduce it was Paul's. Unlike before, Kolanii didn't panic when he woke up. He felt strangely numb. Too strange, too normal. His body was still in shock, sweat dripping down his temple and his hands trembling while feeling like they're being poked by pins and needles. He kept his head on Paul's lap, curling his body closer to let the other know he was awake.
"Are you awake?"
Kolanii simply nodded, keeping his eyes wide open and legs curled against his chest as Paul's hand rested on his arms comfortingly. A single dandelion fell from his hair. He smiled weakly to himself, realizing Paul had put the little yellow flowers he had collected in his white hair while he was asleep. It was a cute habit they had, ever since the day they got told to keep a dandelion as a symbol of their friendship.
The two were sitting right beside the multiverse portal, waiting for the right time to go through to their team. But Kolanii felt comfortable here, resting on the lap of someone he loved and trusted…
Maybe he shouldn't spend too much time over complicating his own issues. Maybe he can accept things the way they are…
Maybe then, Nameless wouldn't become such a frustrating anxiety inducer.