Chapter Text
Zhang Hao's patience was growing thin as the teenage cashier languidly scanned his items one by one, bagging them up leisurely as if Hao had all the time in the world.
“That’ll be 9,500 won. Card or cash?”
“Card, please.” Hao smiled through gritted teeth as he drummed his fingers erratically against the service counter. He hovered his card above the reader, then stole a glance behind him. The convenience store was empty- besides him and a small handful of workers- but that feeling he had become all too familiar with still gnawed at him.
A pair of eyes on his back.
Someone watching him.
The cashier reached for the receipt, then paused mid-motion. “Sorry, sir, if you don’t mind me asking…”
You’ve got to be kidding me. Hao fought back the urge to roll his eyes. “Yes?”
“Are you an idol? Or a model or actor or something?”
“No, I’m just an office worker.” Not a lie- just not the whole truth either. Hao did work at an office, and he absolutely detested it. However, Hao also had spent the past 2 years working as a solo idol under a small company, hoping that someday it would be sustainable enough to quit his day-job. With rent and bills always looming, that dream felt distant. Performing gigs for crowds less than a hundred people made him a nobody in the idol world.
“Oh, sorry!” The cashier flushed and finally handed Hao his receipt. “I just thought, because of your visuals, that you were definitely some kind of celebrity.”
Hao chuckled without humour, “Would a celebrity be buying convenience store meals at 10pm?”
“I don’t know, I guess not. But I mean it as a compliment- if you wanted to be an idol, you totally could.”
Hao didn’t respond to that. Becoming an idol wasn’t that easy- he knew that all too well. He simply smiled politely and took his shopping bag before the cashier could waste any more of his time with meaningless small talk.
Cold autumn wind whipped against his face as he walked back to his apartment, but the chill in the air was nothing compared to the icy pit that was growing in his stomach. He could hear it: Footsteps, matching his pace.
He stopped. The footsteps stopped.
He turned. The street was barren.
Swallowing hard, Hao continued walking, with a newfound urgency in his stride. Was he imagining things? No, he could definitely hear footsteps.
He yanked out his phone and dialled a familiar number.
“... Hello? Hao?”
Hao felt himself relax, just a tiny bit. His shaky breaths evened out upon hearing the tired drawl of his friend on the other end of the line.
“Hey, Taerae. What are you up to?”
“It’s nearly ten at night and tomorrow’s a weekday, what do you think I’m up to?”
“Hm… Out clubbing?” Hao tried to joke, but he was unable to hide the nervous edge in his voice.
Taerae, perceptive as usual, picked up on it immediately. “What’s up?”
“I’ve just finished practice and I’m walking home but…” He let the sentence hang in the air, afraid of saying too much in case someone was listening in.
“And you think your stalker is following you again?”
“Mmhm.”
He heard his friend sigh on the other end of the line. “Hao, this has been going on for too long now. It’s been months! Haven’t you reported this to the police already?”
“I tried! But they said until I get some solid evidence, there’s nothing they can do.”
Taerae cursed under his breath. “They’re so useless.”
“Right?” Hao whined. “This isn’t fair! This is the kind of stuff that happens to someone once they’re a super-famous idol with heaps of fans. Why do I have to deal with all this negative stuff without any of the benefits!”
“But you said you’ve never actually seen this stalker, right?” A pause, then carefully he adds, “Don’t be offended, but… You’re sure you’re not just being paranoid?”
Hao scoffed. “Of course not! How dare you doubt me.”
“I don’t doubt you, I was just… Double-checking?” Taerae said sheepishly before his tone hardened, “So, what can I do to help? Do you want me to come get you?”
“No, there’s no need for that, I’m only like two minutes away from my apartment anyway.” Hao took another glance around again. “But can you just… Stay on the line with me until I get there? Distract me, sing me a song.”
“I am not serenading you over the phone.”
“Aw, worth a shot.”
Instead, Taerae started to launch into a detailed retelling of his day. He had the day off work and used the opportunity to go busking in Hongdae- a huge hit, as expected.
Hao was only half listening. He tried to hone his hearing on the sound of footsteps behind him, but… Nothing. Had they finally left him? Or was there no one there to begin with?
“Okay, I’m at my apartment now, so I won’t keep you up any longer. Thanks for keeping me company.” Hao said once he reached the apartment complex’s main entrance.
“No problem. Good night, Hao.”
Hao tucked his phone into his pocket and made his way up to his flat on the 4th floor. Just as he was sliding his key into his front door’s lock, his blood ran cold-
Footsteps.
Behind him.
Getting closer.
Closer.
A hand tapped his shoulder.
Hao startled and whirled around so fast he lost grip of his shopping bag, packets of instant noodles spilling across the hallway floor.
“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Standing face to face with Hao was a man he’d never seen before. He appeared to be a similar age to himself, and a similar height too. He looked like he’d just come back from working out- his bleached blond hair was tousled and he was sporting sweatpants and a singlet, despite it being the middle of Autumn. Soft, rounded facial features that gave him an almost innocent charm. Well-defined muscles that gave a different sort of charm. He had a tattoo on his collarbone- the sun, the moon and a star. Hao noted that. Hao also noted that he was…
Attractive.
Without missing a beat, the stranger bent down and started picking up the scattered packets of noodles.
Very attractive.
“Here you go. Sorry again.” The man stood up straight and handed the packets of instant noodles over. “Big fan of ramyeon, huh?”
“Who are you?” Hao cut to the chase, his heart still thudding against his chest from the initial scare. Attractiveness be damned, a stranger was a stranger.
“Sung Hanbin.” The man- Hanbin- offered his hand out, “I’ve just moved into this building. I just got back from the gym, and saw you out in the hallway, so I thought I’d introduce myself. Seeing as we’re going to be neighbours now.”
Hao relaxed upon hearing Hanbin’s explanation. Just a new tenant, nothing out of the ordinary. “Nice to meet you, Hanbin. I’m Zhang Hao.” He took Hanbin’s offered hand into his and gave it a shake.
Hanbin’s expression lit up with a grin spreading so wide it caused his eyes to crinkle into crescents. Hao thought he looked like sunshine personified. With his blond hair and bright features, Hanbin radiated warmth. Hao almost felt compelled to look away from him, as if holding eye contact for too long might be as blinding as staring directly at the sun.
Words caught in Hao's throat. He wanted to apologise for jumping and making a fool of himself. He wanted to say something cool and collected, to leave Hanbin a better lasting first impression.
“Are you an idol?” Were the words that tumbled out instead. A flush started creeping up his neck. Out of all the things he could've said, that was what he went with? How embarrassing.
But Hanbin wasn't bothered; if anything, he looked delighted. His eyes twinkled as he laughed heartily. “Why? Because of my visuals?” He teased with a goofy, exaggerated wink.
Yes. Hao rolled his eyes but felt his lips tug upwards against his will to mirror the other man’s smile. “Of course not.”
Hanbin hummed, seemingly not convinced. “I’m not, but… Are you an idol?”
“Because of my visuals?”
“Well… yes.”
Hao raised an eyebrow at Hanbin. Is this flirting? “I just work in an office…” He hesitated; he was about to leave it at that. But something about the almost imperceptible tilt of Hanbin’s head in curiosity, eyes silently urging Hao to continue talking, made him falter. Oh, what the heck! They were neighbours now, Hanbin would be seeing Hao coming home late from performances or practice sessions all the time. If he was going to find out eventually, may as well get it over and done with. “But, you’re kind of right. I’m also an idol.”
Hanbin’s mouth rounded into a perfect ‘O’, his eyes going wide with a mixture of surprise and wonder. “Really? I’m living in the same apartment as someone famous? Should I ask for your autograph now or later?”
Hao slapped Hanbin’s arm playfully. “Shut up, I’m not a famous idol. I wasn’t lying when I said I have a nine-to-five. I just do small performances and stuff. If I’m lucky, sometimes I’ll open up for a rookie group.”
Hanbin, however, didn’t look any less starstruck by this revelation. If anything, he seemed even more amazed. “Wow, so you balance both a full-time job and being an idol? That’s impressive. You’re like Batman.”
“Like Batman?” Hao echoed with a laugh.
“Salaryman by day, idol by night.”
Hao snorted, biting his lip down to control his smile from growing too wide. “Sure. Let’s go with that.” Aware of the passing time, he let out a long, almost reluctant, sigh as he added, “Look, as much as I’d love to keep chatting, I have work in the morning and I still need to eat dinner. But I’m sure we’ll run into each other soon.”
Hao couldn’t help but notice the way Hanbin’s smile dropped ever-so-slightly, sunlight overcast by what appeared to be… Disappointment? Hao couldn’t blame him, truth be told, Hao would also love to stay and keep chatting with his new neighbour, but he knew the responsible thing would be to go inside, eat dinner, wash up and go to bed.
“Wait, why don’t you come inside my apartment?” Hanbin offered just as Hao started to take a step back towards his door.
Hao blinked, raising an eyebrow. What part of ‘I have work in the morning’ was that hard to understand? “I’m sorry?”
“I mean, I actually cooked dinner before going to the gym, but I think I overestimated the portioning. So, I’d appreciate some help finishing it all. I’m no chef, but,” he eyed Hao’s shopping bag, “if you wanted something that’s not instant ramen, the offer is there.”
Hao hummed to himself as he thought it over. His introverted instincts were screaming at him to reject the offer but… It had been a while since he’d eaten a home-cooked meal. Plus, Hanbin was, well, incredibly handsome- almost exactly Hao’s type. Lately, he’d been so busy between his day job and idol activities that he hadn’t had the chance to meet many new guys. Hao quickly did the math in his head; the pros outweighed the cons.
He pretended to hesitate for a few more seconds, secretly relishing in the shy smile Hanbin wore as he waited for Hao’s answer. “Okay, if it’s okay with you,” Hao replied finally with a small shrug, feigning nonchalance.
Hanbin’s shoulders slumped with relief, his smile growing brighter with confidence. “Of course! I wouldn’t offer it if it wasn’t.” He swung open his front door- the one directly opposite Hao's- making an overly exaggerated gesture towards the entrance, “After you.”
What a dork. Unfortunately, Hao found himself entirely endeared. “Wow, such a chivalrous host.” He played along easily, tossing a wink over his shoulder as he stepped into his apartment. He didn’t fail to notice the way Hanbin ducked his head to laugh to himself, a pink tint dusting his cheeks.
***
Hanbin wasn’t lying when he said he had overestimated his portioning. Hao watched in bewilderment as Hanbin set the round coffee table with dinner. There was spicy beef stew, rice, dumplings and even a side dish of various pickled vegetables. A bottle of red wine was also placed on the table, with a glass set in front of each spot.
“Wow. Do you always cook this well for yourself?” Hao asked, not bothering to hide the amazement in his voice.
Hanbin chuckled. “Well, cooking is something that I find quite enjoyable,” he answered while scooping rice into a small bowl before passing it to Hao. “But to be honest, no, I’m definitely not putting this amount of effort in every day. I guess, maybe I sensed that I’d need extra today.”
“In case you had a cute boy living as your neighbour to share with.”
“Nope, in case my neighbour was someone living on a diet of instant noodles. Think of this as charity work.”
“Hey!”
Hanbin smirked at Hao’s reaction, “Okay, correction. In case my neighbour was a cute boy living on a diet of instant noodles.”
Hao scrunched up his face. “It’s not instant noodles every day; sometimes I get food delivery.” He lifted his first spoonful of stew to his lips, entirely ready to fake his reaction if it meant keeping his new neighbour happy. However, as the flavour touched his tongue, his eyes widened. It looked like acting wouldn’t be necessary.
“Wow. This is delicious.”
Hanbin let out a small sigh of relief, “I’m glad you like it.” He reached over for the wine. “Do you drink?”
Hao hesitated; usually he wouldn’t drink if he had work the next day as he didn’t have the strongest tolerance with alcohol but… Looking at the expectant expression of the handsome guy in front of him, he easily folded.
Hao nodded, smiling politely as Hanbin filled two wine glasses. It was fine, just one glass wouldn’t hurt.
***
Fuck. Hao was totally drunk.
Hanbin was too generous of a host, consistently refilling Hao’s glass before it could ever empty. Even though Hanbin had repeatedly reminded Hao that it was okay to stop drinking whenever he wanted, Hao found it hard to resist when the wine was right under his nose.
But he decided it was fine, it wasn’t often that he let himself drink like this. Between the stress of his office job, idol activities and stalker situation, he felt like he deserved this.
“Ugh, sometimes I wish my boss would just like… Get a life, you know? Just because you’re working overtime everyday, doesn’t mean we all have to too! Some of us have other things to do!” Hao whined, slumping forwards and burying his face into his hands.
He was vaguely aware how hot his face felt. He knew his face and neck would be flushed red from the alcohol at this point, which would usually embarrass him, but right now he was too intoxicated to care.
Hao lowered his hands from his face to watch as Hanbin laughed. His neighbour was turning out to be the perfect audience for Hao’s drunken rambling; never interrupting and always laughing at the right times. As far as Hao could tell, Hanbin had remained relatively sober throughout the night. Either Hanbin wasn’t drinking as much, or he could handle alcohol better… Probably a combination of both.
“You look like a cat.” Hao blurted suddenly.
“Hm?” Hanbin tilted his head at the abrupt topic change.
“Your dimples,” Hao said and reached his arm across the table to gently trace the soft lines along Hanbin’s cheeks with the pads of his fingers, “they look like whiskers when you smile. But you also look like a hamster… Hm… Hamcat…” Hao let his touch linger on Hanbin’s skin for a few seconds longer than necessary before he pulled back.
Hanbin’s complexion flushed pink. “Okay,” he said, clearing his throat, “I think that’s enough wine for you.”
Hao pursed his lips into a pout. “Whaaat.” As if the universe was mocking him, a wave of dizziness hit him and he dropped his head back into his hands again. “Ugh, okay, maybe you’re right.”
“Let me get you some water,” Hanbin said gently, before standing up to walk to the kitchen.
Hao unlocked his phone once he was alone, the time read 12:04am. Yikes, tomorrow- well, today- was going to be a rough day in the office. Still, he couldn’t bring himself to regret it- the night with Hanbin had turned out to be very enjoyable.
Hao learned that they had a lot in common. Hanbin was twenty four, only a year younger than Hao. He currently worked at his mother’s cafe, which explained his talent for cooking, but wanted to eventually transition into being a preschool teacher. Hao had poked his tongue out at him when he said that, asking why he’d want to work with snot-nosed toddlers all day.
“I just think they’re cute. I’ve always had a soft spot for kids,” Hanbin had replied.
Hao revealed to him how if he didn’t move to Korea, he would’ve become a teacher in China.
“Not for kids though, don’t get mistaken!” Hao had tutted upon seeing Hanbin wearing an expression that read ‘hypocrite’. “I would’ve taught music. Maybe I’d start with high schoolers but eventually I’d like to teach at a university.”
Hao also learned that Hanbin also shared his passion for music.
“In particular, I love dancing. I’ve been doing it for years.”
“You must be very good at it.”
Hanbin had grinned, but didn’t deny Hao’s claims. “I’m okay,” he answered vaguely, but Hao could tell he was underselling himself. “One day you should come to my dance studio, we could practice together.”
Hao had nodded. “I’d like that.”
What a coincidence, that the person living opposite Hao had so many similarities to him. Also, Hao thought that maybe, perhaps, quite possibly, Hanbin was showing interest in Hao- interest beyond just a general curiosity in a new neighbour.
Hanbin returned with a glass of water, placing it on the table in front of Hao. “Here, drink this.”
Hao gratefully accepted, taking small sips to avoid upsetting his already queasy stomach. “Thanks. Sorry if I’m, like, keeping you up too late. I can head home now-”
“No!” Hanbin rushed to interject. “I mean, I’m the one who invited you in here and got out the wine. If anything, I should be the one apologising for keeping you up. Really, stay as long as you want.”
“Then, if you don’t mind… If I could stay for just a few more minutes. I think I’ll throw up if I stand up from this chair right now.” Truthfully, he knew he’d be fine walking the very short distance back to his flat, but he didn’t feel like parting from Hanbin’s company just yet.
“Of course, that’s fine. Take as long as you need.”
Both boys settled into a comfortable silence and Hao took the opportunity to study Hanbin’s profile. The ceiling light’s reflection cast a halo on the blond’s hair. A thought crossed Hao’s mind: maybe Hanbin was his guardian angel, sent down from the heavens. A beat later, a second thought crossed Hao’s mind: he had definitely drunk too much wine.
“Thank you,” Hao spoke up, trying to distract his mind from conjuring up more embarrassing thoughts.
Hanbin raised an eyebrow. “For… Giving you a hangover on a workday?”
Hao grimaced. True, waking up for work was not going to be fun for him. That, however, was a problem for Future Hao.
“No,” he shook his head, “I’m being serious. Thank you for inviting me in. For dinner. For just, chatting with me. It’s been nice to get my mind off things. Being distracted, it’s good. It was nice to actually relax, thank you.” Words kept spewing from his mouth before his brain could catch up to process and filter what he was saying- as a consequence, his thanks was coming out a lot less eloquent than he would’ve liked.
Hanbin didn’t seem to care, eloquent or not, he visibly melted at Hao’s words- his gaze softening and the corners of his mouth upturning almost imperceptibly. Hao could’ve sworn the halo of light reflected on him seemed to shine even brighter. “I’m glad. I also had a lovely time,” he said quietly.
Then, his brow furrowed slightly and his expression shifted into something more serious, “But you said you like being distracted. If you don’t mind me asking, is there something worrying you?”
Hao hesitated- it would be very easy to play off his worries as general stress about work or his idol activities but… Maybe it was the alcohol. Or maybe it was the genuine concern in Hanbin's eyes. Whatever the reason, he felt compelled to tell the truth.
The real reason he needed a distraction. The worry that constantly gnawed at him.
“I’ve been getting stalked,” Hao admitted, the serious topic change suddenly making him feel a lot more sober.
Hanbin’s eyes widened, but he just nodded, silently urging Hao to elaborate.
“It’s been going on for maybe three or four months now? Actually,” Hao started absentmindedly drumming his fingers on the table with no real rhythm, “maybe it’s been more than that. But for the past three to four months, I’ve been aware of it. I know this is something that’s expected when you become an idol but,” he stopped drumming the table to run his hands through his hair in exhaustion, “shit! It’s still scary. I can barely be considered an idol yet here I am with a stalker.”
“Have you reported it to the police?” Hanbin asked.
Hao shook his head, “I’ve tried but… They don’t seem to take it seriously. Especially since I don’t have any evidence of being stalked. ‘Feeling like someone’s always watching me’ isn’t strong enough for a case- they think I might just be imagining things, but I swear, I’m not!”
Hao hung his head low, suddenly feeling very small- he hated showing his insecurities like this. “Sorry, I don’t usually tell people about this. It’s a bit embarrassing.”
“Hey,” Hanbin said gently, “look at me.”
There was a quiet authority in his voice now. Hao looked up to meet the other man’s gaze.
“First of all, you shouldn’t feel embarrassed,” Hanbin continued. “There is nothing to be ashamed about. Being stalked is terrifying- you have every right to be scared.” Hanbin exhaled slowly. “Second, I’m sorry the police aren’t taking you seriously, that must be really frustrating.” He paused, his expression softening, “I’m glad you told me, though. I don’t think you should have to bottle all your burdens up, you’re already working in an office, training as an idol and you’ve been having to deal with a stalker. I can’t even begin to imagine how tiring that must be. You must be exhausted.”
Hao nodded, slowly, “Yeah… I mean, also, I brought it on myself.” He laughed bitterly, looking at his hands. “Maybe it’s a sign to quit the idol pipe dream and just stick to being a salaryman like everyone else.”
“Absolutely not.”
The firmness in Hanbin’s voice made Hao look back up in surprise.
“You shouldn’t give up on your dream, no way,” Hanbin said. “I’ll help you catch your stalker.”
“Huh?”
“I’ll help you catch them, or at least, find evidence.” Hanbin continued without hesitation, “You shouldn’t have to deal with it all alone, it’s not fair.”
Hao just stared at him, dumbfounded. “But, why? I mean- We only just met. Why go out of your way for a stranger? Really, you don’t have to.”
“Strangers? After that dinner together we’re still strangers?” Hanbin gasped and held his hand to his heart in mock offense- it took all Hao’s self control to not roll his eyes.
Hanbin lowered his hand and shifted back into a serious mood, “No, but seriously. We’re neighbours now, and I hope I’m not jumping the gun when I say this- but I think we’re going to become good friends. And this is what friends do, they help each other. I want to help you, Hao.”
Hanbin’s final sentence seemed to linger in his stare, and Hao felt his mouth go dry. Maybe Hanbin was his guardian angel. It was too perfect, that this kind man would appear before him at the perfect time and offer him help- there was no way he was human. He felt his eyes going misty. Oh God, no, please don’t make me cry in front of this man. I’ve embarrassed myself enough tonight. Hao blinked rapidly, trying to disperse the feeling of tears.
Hanbin just smiled- that perfectly angelic smile- and waited patiently as Hao collected himself.
”Tha-” Hao’s voice came out croaky. He stopped and cleared his throat before trying again, words still a bit shaky, “Thank you. Genuinely. I- You really don’t have to do this. And if you wake up tomorrow regretting your words and want to change your mind, that is perfectly fine.”
“I won’t change my mind.” Hanbin said, firm and unwavering. Hao could tell by the look in Hanbin’s eyes that he meant it. “We can think of a plan another day, but for now, I think you should go get some sleep, I’ve kept you up long enough.”
Hao nodded, suddenly very aware of just how drained he felt.
Hanbin walked Hao to the door, and for a moment they both just stood there, staring at each other, neither wanting to part company.
Hao broke eye contact first, bending down to put on his shoes. “Well, I know I’ve said it a lot tonight, but,” he finished tying his laces and stood up straight again, meeting Hanbin’s eyes once more, “again, thank you. For everything.”
“You’re welcome, Hao.” Hanbin breathed and leaned in towards Hao.
Hao’s heart rate sped up, the room shrinking around them. All the furniture and decor disappeared from his peripheral- it was just him and Hanbin and nothing else. Thump. Thump. Thump. Hao closed his eyes, also instinctively leaning in as well.
He waited for the soft brush of lips.
Instead, he felt fingers slip into his hair.
“Sorry, you had something in your hair,” Hanbin said.
Hao’s eyes flew open, his face burning red. “Oh.” He managed to squeak out, heart now racing from embarrassment, “Thanks. Again.”
Hanbin grinned brightly, “You’re welcome, again.” He stepped back. “Good night, Hao.”
“Night, Hanbin.” Hao replied, forcing himself to sound normal as he gave a small wave and slipped out the door.
The moment it clicked shut behind him, Hao buried his face into his hands.
As if I haven’t humiliated myself enough tonight!