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"It's almost ten o'clock!" I groan, pushing myself up from where I was lounging on Nick's bed. "My mum said I have to be back by then."
"I wish you didn't have to go," Nick says.
"I know," I pout.
We'd had such a nice evening together- taking Nellie and Henry to the park, eating pasta salad Sarah had made for dinner, and afterwards, cuddling up on Nick's bed to watch Howl's Moving Castle. I'd seen it before with Tori but it was Nick's first time seeing it. He loved it.
And now, I have to head home.
"I think it's raining pretty hard," Nick says suddenly. "Can you hear it?"
We both go quiet. I move towards the window and sure enough, rain drums against the window pane. Then comes a rumble of thunder and a flash of lightning that cracks through the sky, causing the rain to come down even harder.
Nick gets up from his bed, joining me at the window. "It's a pretty bad storm," Nick says, "I don't know if you should be going out in this weather…"
It's a Saturday night during summer break, so I pull out my phone to text my mum.
Charlie
hi mum
I think it's best if I stay at Nick's tonight because of the storm
what do you think?
there's thunder & lightning
It doesn't take long for my mum to reply.
Mum
ok Charlie
I look at Nick. "I think she's okay with me staying!"
Nick smiles.
Then my phone pings again.
Mum
Your safety is the most important thing.
You're right, you should stay at Nick's.
But please be back by 11am tomorrow morning.
We are visiting your grandparents as a family.
Charlie
ok mum
thank you for letting me stay!!!!
Mum
You're welcome, Charlie.
Tell Nick he is invited to come along tomorrow as well if he'd like.
Charlie
thank you mum!
Mum
🙂
My mum has eased up a bit now that the school year is done. The relationship between me and her certainly isn't perfect but I have noticed it's been improving lately.
"I can stay!" I say, tackling Nick onto the bed. He lands with a thud, laughing, a grin stretching across his face as his hazel eyes light up. God, he's so handsome. I still can't believe he's my boyfriend sometimes.
"So…" I say, his arms wrapped around me. "My mum says you're invited to come with us to my grandparents tomorrow. But I highly doubt you'd want to-"
"I want to," Nick says immediately, stealing a kiss from me.
"You do? Cause I'm sure it will be boring and you know how my grandparents can be…"
"Being with you is never boring for me, plus I want to be there in case they say anything that upsets you."
"I love you," I say, stealing a kiss back.
"I love you so much," Nick says, rubbing slow circles on my back. "I'm really glad you're staying the night."
"Shouldn't we ask your mum if it's okay for me to sleep over?" I wonder.
"She told me a long time ago that you're always welcome here," Nick says, climbing off the bed, "but I'll run it by her anyway. I'll be right back!"
He kisses my forehead before heading downstairs.
I sit up, resting my back against Nick's headboard, my legs stretched out in front of me, ankles crossed. Nellie wanders into the room, jumping up on the bed, curling onto my lap. I bury my hands in her soft fur, pressing little kisses to the top of her head.
Then an idea comes to me.
When Nick returns, he has a big smile and a cup of tea in each hand. "You can stay! Of course she said yes. Thought you'd like some tea?"
"I would. Thank you," I say, wrapping my arms around Nellie. Nick gently places the mugs on the dresser.
"Are you happy, Nellie?" I ask her in a silly tone, rubbing behind her ears. "Are you happy I'm staying?"
"She definitely is," Nick chimes in. "She loves you so much. Almost as much as I do." Then he winks at me.
My stomach does a little flip. Even though we've been saying I love you for a year now, sometimes it hits me just how lucky I feel to be loved by Nick.
I smile at him affectionately. "I had an idea when you were downstairs," I say.
Nick is standing at the foot of the bed with his arms casually crossed, a curious look on his face. "What's your idea?"
"I thought it could be fun for us to make a pillow fort to sleep in tonight."
"That sounds amazing!" Nick hops onto the bed, burying his head into my stomach.
"You really like the idea?" I ask. I had a feeling he would but I just want to make sure.
"Yes!" He giggles and I kiss the top of his head.
I tell him that me and Tori used to make pillow forts sometimes, especially when it was stormy weather like it is tonight. Nick said he always wanted to do something like that but David never would. The one time he asked, David said no, that's for babies. And Nick didn't want to do it alone.
Nick runs downstairs, excited to tell his mum what we're planning and the next thing I know, Sarah is bringing in an air mattress and every spare pillow and blanket she can find from the closet.
Before long, we have it all set up. It's really cozy- perfect for the two of us. Blankets are draped carefully, the air mattress is blown up and tucked inside, covered by an abundance of pillows. Nick even hangs some spare string lights across the top.
Sarah brings us snacks- popcorn, chocolates, gummy bears and sliced up fruit to keep it a bit healthy. We both hug her tightly, thanking her for all her help.
After saying goodnight, Sarah leaves, closing the door behind her.
"I just realised I don't have clothes to sleep in," I say, looking down at my ripped jeans and cardigan. "Can I borrow a pair of shorts and one of your jumpers?"
Nick chuckles under his breath. "You can, but I'm starting to run low on jumpers. Do you have a stash of them at your house or something?"
I feel my cheeks warm. "I might…"
"Charlie!" Nick says, feigning annoyance, hands on his hips.
"I'll return them soon, I promise."
"You better." Nick kisses me. "Or I'll be going to school naked at this rate."
I just giggle, changing from my clothes into Nick's. I have to pull the drawstring all the way to keep his shorts from falling down.
Once we're both in comfy clothes, we finish our tea. Then Nick turns off his bedroom light, leaving the room dimly lit by the string lights and we crawl into the fort together, snacks in tow.
"Should I have brought my laptop in here to watch another movie?" Nick asks.
I shake my head. "One movie is enough for me. I'd rather talk. Is that okay?" I cuddle up to him.
"Talking is good," Nick says, nodding his head. "I just love being in here with you. I don't even want to sleep because I never want this night to end!"
I just laugh. Nick can be so enthusiastic sometimes, and I find it incredibly sweet. Now that I know this is something he's always wanted to do as a kid but never got the chance, I understand just how much it means to him.
"You know, this doesn't have to be the only time we do this," I say.
"Really?" He looks at me, his eyes wide.
"Yes," I say and he relaxes in my embrace. We're quiet for a bit and I try to think of something random to ask him.
"Question for you. Would you ever get a tattoo?"
"Hmm…" Nick ponders. "Good question. I might."
"Oh yeah?" I say, "Any thoughts on what it would be and where?"
He pauses for a moment as he thinks. "Maybe a bi flag. I was thinking on the inside of my upper arm."
"So your armpit?" I tease.
"No!" Nick laughs, tickling me. "Like, lower than that! Between my armpit and my elbow."
"I really like that idea," I say, pushing his hands away so he'll stop tickling me. Then the air settles and I get more serious. "It makes me happy that you'd feel confident enough to get that as a tattoo."
"I am now. Confident about it… a lot of my confidence comes from you," he says in a genuine tone.
I swallow, holding back tears. It's beautiful to see how far Nick has come in his journey.
"What about you?" Nick asks. "Any tattoos on the horizon for the incredible Charlie Spring?"
"Well," I clear my throat. "I have been thinking about it a bit and I had this thought of doing ocean waves."
"Oh! That's cool." Nick turns to me, giving me his full attention. "Why ocean waves?"
"A few reasons… one is sort of to represent my mental health journey. I see my mental state like ocean waves. Sometimes, when things get bad, the waves feel bigger. When things are good, it feels like the water is almost still. And I mean, sometimes it's so big, it pulls me under and tosses me to shore." Nick takes my hands his his, giving them a gentle squeeze. "I can't expect the waves to ever fully stop. But I can learn to swim in it and knowing the rough waters don't last forever brings me hope when I'm going through a tough time."
"I love that analogy, Charlie," Nick says.
"I have Geoff to thank for that one," I smile.
"Where would you want it on your body?"
"I was thinking maybe my hip. Somewhere private where people don't see, I mean, other than you. Because this tattoo is for me, just to know it's there."
Nick nods in support. "Sounds perfect."
We stare into each other's eyes for a moment as we lie side by side, facing one another.
"What's another reason?" Nick asks. "You said you want that tattoo for a few reasons."
"Oh, right," I say, running a hand gently down Nick's cheek. "Another reason is that the sea reminds me of us. It reminds me of the day we officially became boyfriends and just thinking about that perfect day brings me joy."
Nick cups my cheeks, giving me a tender kiss. "That was a perfect day, wasn't it?"
I nod. I can almost feel the warm sun on my face, the sound of the seagulls and the water crashing to the shore. Nick's voice echoes through my mind, sending tingles down my spine, even now.
I like Charlie Spring in a romantic way, not just a friend way!
"Promise me," Nick says, pulling me back to the present. "If you do decide to get that tattoo, that I can be there. We'll get tattoos together."
"Of course," I say, "I wouldn't want to do it without you there. But it probably won't happen until I'm in uni, at least."
"Yeah," Nick says.
A crack of thunder crashes above us, causing us to tense up. Nick holds me tightly and I begin to relax again. If anything, the storm outside only makes being in the pillow fort together feel even cozier.
I look over at the uneaten snacks. "We haven't even touched what your mum so lovingly prepared for us."
"Pass me a strawberry and a piece of chocolate, please."
"Would you like to eat them together?"
Nick nods and I pop them into his mouth. "Yum," he mumbles as he chews.
I eat a peach slice and some gummy bears.
"Okay." I turn back to Nick. "Now that I asked you a random question, do you have one for me?"
"There is something I've been curious about, but it's pretty sappy," Nick says.
"Uh oh," I say with a smile. "Not the Nicholas Nelson sap."
He playfully nudges me.
"Okay." A serious expression appears on his face. "When did you realise, without a doubt, that you love me?"
He's looking at me so much anticipation and my whole body feels warm in the best way.
"The Paris trip was when it started for so many reasons." I hold his hand, rubbing circles on his palm with my thumb. "You being there for me at the museum when I fainted. When you admitted at Tara's party that it was you who gave me that hickey. When you wanted me to come meet your dad. The night we spent together in our hotel room, just the two of us. All of those things were the start of me falling for you. But the moment I wanted to tell you without a doubt that I love you was when we were in your room after prom. When I knew I could trust you and I began to open up about the hardest parts of my life. The parts I had never shared with anyone. I could feel how much you cared for me. So that was it. That was the moment."
Nick reaches for me, pulling me close, foreheads touching before our lips do.
"Everything you felt, I felt it too," he whispers.
We fall into a deep kiss, tongues brushing, lips lingering, unhurried.
"I love loving you, Char," Nick says softly.
I let the warm, tingly feeling settle in my chest.
"I love loving you too, Nick," I say, meaning it wholeheartedly.
My eyelids grow heavy and I can tell Nick's are as well. I curl into his chest, our breathing slowing down into a steady rhythm.
The sound of the rain fades into the background as I close my eyes, feeling safe and warm, wrapped up in blankets and my boyfriend's arms, and I fall fast asleep.