Chapter Text
His thoughts were just too much. Spoke couldn't help it.
He slipped away into the shadows, perfectly blending in as a voidling. He transported from shadow to shadow, just wanting to get to his room faster. He could start sobbing at any moment, and he didn't want it to be infront of anyone.
As he slithered, he stumbled across his best friend Mapicc. He didn't seem to notice him. Spoke hastily thought of a plan so that Mapicc wouldn't try bother him while he cried to himself. He didn't want anyone to see him cry. (I have no idea what to put here)
"Hey Mapicc!!" Spoke popped out of the ground, catching Mapicc off guard.
"Hey Spoke!" Mapicc turned around.
Spoke watched as Mapicc's expression changed, his eyes scanning Spokes face. His pupils were visible, weren't they?
"You good bro?"
"Yep!!" Spoke had to think of something. What excuse could he come up with this time?
Mapicc stayed silent, watching as his best friends eyes darted around the room from time to time. Spoke internally panicked, he could tell Mapicc was catching on.
"Uh--- I have to go do something, i'll be back in a bit!! Take care of our crops for now, ok?? Ok bye Mapicc!!"
"Wait Spoke---"
"I'LL BE BACK IN A BIT!!!!"
A shaky smile was plastered on his face, like a curve painted onto a doll. He waved goodbye excitedly, then absolutely booked it up their stairs. He could feel his face heating up.
He pressed the button to take him up repeatedly, not caring if it broke. Anything to get out of his base. Anything to get out of his thoughts.
He jumped out their elevator-like contraption, and started running into the woods. He could feel his face heating up, this wasn't good whatsoever.
"Just a little further." He thought. He planned to run until his legs gave out.
A few minutes later of running, he was panting, and his legs hurt like hell. He wasn't sure how he hadn't started crying yet. He stopped infront of a little pond, tumbling and almost falling in.
His whole body was shaky as he sat down. The constant pressure was simply too much. He was sure B.A.T was going to find him soon, one way or another. Maybe he should just give up? He was getting tired anyway, a little too tired.
His mind couldn't seem to get off what had been happening recetly. The incident with Leo and Mapicc, and the thing with Jamato. God, it was all too much for him. He started to wonder if he really was like Ash, if Ash hadn't been lying.
He's been acting too much like him recently, and he hates it. As he thought, his mind pulled him back to the time he started an army of his own, the Spoke Galactic Empire. He didn't realise it at the time, but he was making them to similar labour to what Ash had done.
His actions weren't the only thing lately. His words, his tactics, his destructiveness, his exploits, his manipulation. He was sat in his own demise, and yet he couldn't get out of it.
He didn't even seem to realise, but tears were flowing, and he unconsiously made a sound that sounded like sobbing. He clasped his hands over his mouth. He had been too absobed in his thoughts that he hadn't even realised he was crying.
His tears were falling into the murky pond. He wondered how much of a mess he looked like right now.
Pure curiosity took over him as he crawled closer to the water, ready to make fun of himself. But what he saw couldn't be him. It wasn't him it had to be.
What he saw was a black and purple haired man, smiling back at him as the familiar glitches stared back at him. Spoke stared in a feeling he couldn't describe, but it felt like dispair. He froze, that wasn't him.
Spoke tears fell faster, creating small ripples in the water. The more he cried, the more the figure staring back at him smiled. It was sickening to look down and see him.
Spoke dropped his leg into the water, the water rippling around his leg. The figure smiling at him disappeared, once again only leaving dirty water.
Spoke was breathing heavily, the silence being interrupted by his uneven breathing. His breath hitched as he spiraled further.
"Am I really like Ashswagg?"
The thought dawned on him. He hated to admit it, but the more he thought, the more smililarites he spotted.
"I'm not protecting the server from Ashswagg, I'm not protecting it from the Mafia--- I'm protecting it from YOU."
Spoke shivered at the memory of those words, it was practically drilled into his brain. There was no way he could ever forget.
Maybe he should just give up. Maybe he should just turn himself in and let himself be killed. There was too many things that echo'd in his head. There was too many problems he had to deal with. And the only option he saw to get rid of them was death.
Spoke curled up into a ball, resting his head on his knees as his tail wrapped around him, pulling himself closer.
His tears were still flowing, but all he felt was dull. He felt tired, exhausted, nothing. Giving up was something Ash didn't do, right? At least that could be difference.
"Spoke?" A voice called out. It was distant, but still close.
Spoke acted instantly, splashing invisibility on himself. The voice stopped, footsteps stopping immediately after.
"Spoke, I heard that."
He couldn't see who was calling out to him, but he could just tell they were frowning when they said that.
Spoke checked how much longer he had on his invis. He expected around 5 minutes, but he had 1. He cursed under his breath, he had forgotten to restock on long-form invisibility.
He could hear the strangers footsteps getting closer. They had stopped talking, they were definitely looking out for invis particles.
5.
Spoke panicked. He tried to get up, tried to move his feet, but he couldn't. It was like he was stuck to the floor.
4.
He tried again, he really did, but he was frozen. like a deer in headlights.
3.
The footsteps got louder, closer, faster. Like they somehow knew where to find him.
2.
Spoke should just give up. This is what he wanted, right? The footsteps stopped at the tree line. Spoke closed his eyes, bracing for the impact of an explosion.
1.
He locked eyes with the person. Those familiar red horns catching the moonlight.
0.
Mapicc.
"M-Mapicc.?" Was all he managed to get out.