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Apollo's world exploded when Clay died. All things considered, it didn't really matter to him when it happened a second time.
He woke up in the Hickfield Clinic under lights that burned his eyes, with the heavy scent of flowers stinging his nose. They surrounded his bed, forming an urban garden. Sunflowers from Juniper. Lilies from Lamiroir. Ninetails from the Tenmas. Lilacs from Vera Misham. An assortment from Trucy that she often used as props for her magic shows. Hiding underneath their petals were get well cards with the same words written out in different ways, all reassuring him that he would - eventually - be fine.
Clay wouldn’t have bothered with a card. He would have come in person and screamed, “YOU’RE FINE!” until the nurses kicked him out.
And the nurses had been very good about kicking people out. From the moment he first opened his eyes, even while high on painkillers, Apollo had articulated one request very clearly: no visitors.
No Athena. No Mr. Wright. Not even Trucy.
Every bone in his body ached, not just from his current injuries, but from exhaustion at keeping the facade going. He needed rest. He needed to be alone.
The nurses really had done a good job of respecting his wishes.
Until now.
"My, my. You're a sight for sore eyes, aren't you, Herr Forehead?"
Apollo stared up at the ceiling. WHY is Prosecutor Gavin standing in my doorway?
He inhaled, counted to three, and then asked, "How did you get in?"
“You would not believe how kind and accommodating people can be when you offer an autograph or two.” Prosecutor Gavin chuckled. He held up a small bouquet of roses to add to the growing collection around Apollo’s bed - except that half of the bouquet appeared to be missing. “I may have also told the receptionist that these were supposed to be for you, but that she should have at least one to accentuate her beauty.”
From the looks of it, he’d pulled that line on several nurses too. Apollo rolled his eyes. “I hate you.”
"Ehehehe, that is no way to talk to one of your well-wishers. No wonder you don't have any visitors."
Apollo groaned. "Gavin. Please. Not now. I'm not in the mood for this."
To his credit, Prosecutor Gavin straightened up and stopped laughing. "I am sorry." For once, he actually did look sincere about it. Though it was hard for Apollo to tell with a bandage over one of his eyes. Gavin stepped up to the bed and arranged the remaining roses next to the ones from Trucy. "And I am sorry to hear about Herr Terran. He was just about to go up into space, wasn't he?"
"Yeah. He was." Apollo closed his eyes. "I'm really tired, Gavin."
Prosecutor Gavin did not take the hint. He just pulled up a chair and sat himself down. Then again, knowing Gavin, he'd understood the hint just fine, but didn't care. "You don't think it was the other astronaut?"
Nope. Not doing this. Not with anyone, and definitely not with you. "What? You do?"
"Me? Nein, I am not the prosecutor for this case. I have no opinion, Herr Forehead."
Apollo couldn't help laughing at that. "Prosecutor Gavin, not having an opinion? I'll believe that when I see it."
His chest moved when he laughed and it felt like knives stabbing him multiple times. Which Clay’s killer could easily do. It wouldn’t take much. Apollo had been wrapped in so many bandages that his arms felt numb, but they wouldn’t protect him from a GYAXA knife, not like an astronaut suit was supposed to protect someone.
A bomb hadn’t killed him inside the courtroom, but one little knife managed to slip past the one weak spot in a heavily padded suit and killed Clay.
Whoever had used that knife must have known what they were doing. Whoever had used it must have visited the Cosmos Space Center before.
Which didn’t mean anything, because lots of people used the Cosmos Space Center. Simply placing a person at the scene of the crime wouldn’t prove anything.
But that also meant there would be no reason for anyone to lie and claim that they were just visiting the Space Center for the first time.
His head started to ache. Gavin noticed him wince from the pain. "Are you alright? Do you need some water?"
"No, thanks. Water won't fix anything."
Prosecutor Gavin leaned forward in his chair. "Oh? Then what will?"
Nothing. Nothing that Gavin could ever fix. The rock star prosecutor lived a charmed life surrounded by adoring fans. He didn't know what it was like to get caught up in an explosion. He didn't know what it was like to lose a close friend, or question whether he'd misplaced his trust in someone he cared about, or…
Apollo blinked.
On second thought, maybe Gavin could help. Maybe Gavin was the only one who could help.
"I need to ask you something."
"Ja?"
"When did you know that Daryan Crescend was a murderer?"
Gavin stared at him. "Where did that come from, Herr Forehead?"
"Just answer the question. Please. I need to know."
Despite Apollo's pleading, Gavin had the nerve to give him the stupid, teasing smile. "When you proved it in court. Don't you remember?"
"No. That's not when. You had him all ready to go as a potential witness." Now that Apollo thought about it some more, he remembered something about that trial that had previously slipped his mind. "You said you issued a subpoena when Detective Skye presented those firecracker shards to you. Right?"
The teasing smile left Gavin's face. He sighed and looked up at the ceiling. "Why are we talking about this, Herr Forehead? What does this have to do with…ah." He looked back at Apollo. "…So you do think it was the other astronaut?"
"No. I'm pretty sure he's innocent."
"Pretty sure? That doesn't sound like you, Herr Forehead."
Now it was Apollo's turn to close up. He couldn't get the words to come out. If he spoke them into existence, his suspicions were that much more likely to be true, he just knew it.
After a lengthy pause, Gavin spoke again. "…If you really want to know, it was when Daryan missed his cue."
Apollo blinked. "Before the trial even started?"
"Ja," he replied quietly.
Apollo ignored the pain as he made himself sit up. "Hold on. You put Machi Tobaye through all of that and you knew it wasn't him?"
"No, no, it wasn't like that. Let me explain: I didn't know. It was more of a faint suspicion that wouldn't go away." Gavin chuckled. "You might not believe this, but I usually don't get that upset over missed cues."
"You're right. I don't believe that."
"Think back: Daryan was not the only one who missed a cue that night. Lamiroir missed a lyric during the Guitar Serenade. Machi's piano playing was off. Yet it was only Daryan who had to face my wrath, over a few missed notes that the audience didn't even notice. Now, why do you think that was?"
Apollo pressed his fingers to his forehead to think it over. He hadn't really noticed, but now that Gavin brought it to his attention… "I guess I just assumed that you didn't give Lamiroir and Machi a hard time because they were your guests that night."
"Mmhm, there is some truth to that. But it was not the only reason. That missed cue continued to echo through my head during that whole trial. It wasn't like him. He never missed it before. And I knew, from the information given by Detective Skye, that we might be looking for a killer with an injured shoulder. That would certainly explain the missed cue, wouldn't it?"
"Yeah. It would."
Gavin continued, "I didn't want to believe it, of course. Who would?"
Yeah. Who would?
"And so I told myself that everyone misses a note once or twice in their careers, no matter how talented they might be. It proved nothing. What was more important was the timing of death. You and Detective Skye heard gunshots during the third set. Romein LeTouse died during the third set. The only person who could have fled the scene was Machi. I didn't want to believe that it was Machi either, but that was an easier truth to accept than Daryan. Until Detective Skye presented me with the firecrackers. And you showed me the igniter. That's when I knew."
Apollo laid back against his pillow. It helped to hear all of this, if only a little. "And once you knew…what made you decide to subpoena him? You came to that decision pretty quick."
"How could I not? I may not have wanted to believe it, but if it was true, I couldn't allow an innocent person to be convicted in Daryan's place." He smiled a little bit. "Besides, proving it was your job, Herr Forehead, not mine. All I needed to do was give you a chance to do so."
He leaned forward, and the teasing smile was definitely back. "By the way, Herr Forehead…you never answered my question."
"Which one?"
"Why are we talking about this?"
Apollo closed his eyes. It was his own fault for bringing it up in the first place. He wanted to know, not just for Clay's sake, but for his own. But it couldn't be true. There had to be some other explanation that he hadn't thought about yet. The silence lengthened, and Gavin waited patiently. The usual hospital noises ran on a loop in the background, doctors going about their routines, phone calls being answered, cheerful Christmas music playing on the radio telling all who listened that this was the time of year to believe…
"I think Athena killed Clay."
He said the words, and nothing happened. The world didn't stop.
Gavin frowned. "Athena…? Your feisty fraulein friend from Themis Academy?"
"Yep. That Athena."
If Apollo had said it to anyone at the Wright Anything Agency, they would have insisted that it wasn't true. Mr. Wright would go off on some speech about the importance of trust and always believing in your client. No amount of evidence would convince him otherwise. Maybe Trucy would listen if he brought up the bracelet, but probably not. She loved Athena. So did Pearl. She'd probably slap him.
But Gavin was a prosecutor, not a defense attorney or a defense attorney's assistant. And that, Apollo realized, was what he needed right now. Someone inclined to doubt. Someone inclined to entertain an accusation, no matter how wrong it sounded. Especially someone like Prosecutor Gavin, who hadn't dismissed accusations made against people he loved. He nodded, and simply asked, "What makes you think so? Did they know each other?"
Therein lay another problem. "I don't think so. I told Clay all about the new girl at the office, but I never got around to introducing them, and he never acted like he met her already. It's just…" Apollo held up his wrist. "When we first started investigating the Space Center, my bracelet went crazy around Athena. I kept picking up all of this tension around her. When I asked her if she'd ever been to the Space Center before, she lied and said no. And when we examined the murder weapon, that's when my bracelet really acted up."
Gavin mulled over this. "Not to minimize your pain, Herr Forehead, but I hoped you would have something more concrete to show me than 'my magic bracelet says so.'"
"I know that!" Apollo snapped. "I know my bracelet isn't hard evidence! But it's never been wrong before! I can't get this out of my head. Why would she lie about visiting the museum or handling the knife? She wouldn't have any reason to lie about the museum at least, unless she was actually…guilty…"
His eye twitched, even though it was covered under thick bandages. Maybe it was picking up on his own tension.
Gavin's eyes drifted back up to the ceiling. "Herr Forehead? Would you accept some friendly advice from me?"
Apollo tried to sit up again and the bandages around his chest protested. He ignored the sharp pains. "Yeah. I'll take anything."
"No matter how much it hurts, you must investigate Athena Cykes."
Great. Exactly what I was afraid of. "Why? You said it yourself: the bracelet isn't hard evidence. Besides…she's my friend. We've worked together on so many cases and she's never given me a reason not to trust her before. I…I don't want to believe that she did this."
The slightest of smirks appeared on Prosecutor Gavin's face. "Hmmm, I know that feeling well. But as a wise person once told me when I spoke of how much Daryan meant to me: 'That's nice, but it has nothing to do with the current case.'"
"You don't have to be so cold about it," grumbled Apollo. And why did those words sound weirdly familiar? Why was Gavin smirking at him like that? "…Oh. I wasn't the one who said that to you, was I?"
Prosecutor Gavin doubled over laughing. "Check the court transcript, Herr Forehead, if you don't believe me."
Boy, talk about karma. He wished Gavin hadn't told him that; it hurt to cringe. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said it like that."
"But you were right, Herr Forehead. I needed to hear that, even if it was not the most pleasant thing you could have said to me. In a court of law, there are no 'friends' or 'family members,' or anything of that sort. There is only the truth and justice. You want to believe in Athena? And yet you do not. You have to face that doubt or it will kill you."
Lying in his hospital bed, wrapped in bandages to cover the wounds from the bombing and Ted Tonate's attack, it felt like the doubt was already killing him. It rushed through his body like the oncoming flames from an explosion, burning everything it touched. It overwhelmed him and stifled the Chords of Steel, until just breathing felt difficult. Had it been anyone else that he doubted, Athena would be cheering him on, slapping her palm against her fist with her silly grin, or throwing up a peace sign. "Auf gehts! Let's do this! I'll help you believe in your friend! We'll prove their innocence together!"
That's how they always did things: together. They were friends. They were coworkers.
A person was supposed to be able to trust their coworkers, if nothing else.
He clenched his fists and slammed one of them against the wall by his bedside, startling Prosecutor Gavin. "It's…just…not…fair…"
"Herr Forehead?"
The Chords of Steel came back to life as Apollo doubled over in his bed. "I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS AGAIN!"
"Do…?"
"What am I supposed to do? Put my coworker up on the witness stand again? I don't want to do that! I don't want to hear her excuses and hope they're real and that somehow this is all going to work out and both her and Mr. Wright will be telling the truth and I don't have to choose between them because they're both innocent and then get those hopes crushed because they…won't…stop…lying…!"
With each word, he crashed his fist against the wall. "I'm tired of doubting people! I'm tired of hearing their side of the story and having the whole thing be a lie! I don't want to keep doing this!"
"Herr Forehead."
Prosecutor Gavin's voice brought him back to the present, back to the hospital room. When Apollo looked at him, he'd returned to staring up at the ceiling.
"Listen to me. You can refuse to question this further. You can bury those questions all you want. But there is something important that you need to understand: you will never be able to go back to the life you had before, no matter how much you want to."
He started spinning the ring around his finger. "Every time you look at her, you will wonder if she did it. Every time she says something to comfort you about the incident, you will wonder how she knew so much about the incident in the first place. But, of course, you know her, and you know she cares about you in her own way. So how it could be her? It will get to the point where you cannot stand being in the same room with her. You will start taking long trips just to get away from it all. But you won't get away from him. It will always linger in the back of your mind like a shadow."
"Gavin…"
Prosecutor Gavin lowered his head and locked eyes with Apollo. "You want to know the real reason why I let you question Daryan? I couldn't do it all over again with him too. Trust me. You do not want to spend seven years wondering about this."
He was right. Apollo hated it, but he was right.
"I need to get back to that Space Center."
"Now? With those injuries?"
"I'll be fine."
"I could go in your place and tell you what I found out."
"No." Apollo forced himself halfway off of the bed. "This is something I need to do myself." His body didn't agree, but it would just have to get used to his decision.
Gavin helped him stand up. "And how are you planning to get past your doctor and all of those lovely nurses, Herr Forehead?"
Apollo thought it over for a minute, then smirked. "Well. I could use a distraction."
Prosecutor Gavin took the hint and laughed as he reached for the rest of the bouquet. "I like the way you think. Consider it done."
As he listened to his rival shower words of endless gratitude to the entranced hospital staff, Apollo pushed himself down the hall and out the door. Next stop: the Wright Anything Agency. It was time to take a leave of absence.