Work Text:
“Another party?”
RiverBot stared blankly at the orange bot in front of him. The small, colorful invitation floated a foot from his screen. It was informal, as much as this simulation was, and full to the brim with whimsy. It stood out prominently in the various greens and blues of the forest surrounding him. It was as unorganized as the river that ran below him. The unnatural color palette felt artificially simulated like the trees that were coded around his station.
It was everything RiverBot disliked, but tolerated for his job.
Most bots who’ve met him know this. RiverBot is not a fan of a lot of things, and parties were one of them. Actually, it was more of the amount of bots that showed up to parties. Even bots as oblivious as his own son knew that. He liked to keep to himself. He enjoyed the roar of a river to drown out the squabbles of the machinery around him. It’s why he preferred fish over his own kind. They were quiet and didn’t stop by to ask him useless questions.
His reaction to this screen-blinding invitation card was as expected as the direction of a creek.
“No.”
The bot in front of him frowned. They still held the invitation towards him, like if being persistent changed what his decision was. “Come on, RiverBot! You went to the party last time. Another one won’t hurt, right?”
“That party was an exception.” He corrected with an unamused expression. “The human saved the simulation, and in return, my job. They also correctly identified the fish I needed so I owed them that.” He turned away from the invitation. “The human hasn’t done anything for me since they completed my memories. All they’ve been doing is bothering me with their constant waving.”
“RiverBotttt.” They drawled out their words to try and persuade him. “This isn’t a party for the human. The human checked out a day or two ago.” They pushed the invitation to his face, forcing him to hold it. “This is an employee party to celebrate the Vacation Simulator taking off! It’s where we can let loose a bit, unhinge our [RUSTY JOINTS] from being at our stations all day.”
The fishing bot took another glance at the card. A peeved grunt escaped his vents. “The answer is still no. I have nothing to owe you. EfficiencyBot is more of my boss than you. No offense.”
“What do you mean? I’m technically EfficiencyBot’s boss at the end of the day. I’m the one–”
“Who made this unprofessional invite to an even more unprofessional party.” RiverBot finished, waving the proposition in front of the other bot. “Bots don’t normally take the day off to throw a party, unless their name is [PARTYBOT] or something.” He chuckled at his own joke. “Face it, VacationBot, I’m not going to some nonsense party with bots who don’t know the meaning of ‘peace and quiet.’”
VacationBot pouted and lifted up slightly to not get too wet from the simulated river. RiverBot refused to move to meet them at the stairs, so they had to hover over to give the invite to him. “Well, this is a different kind of party. I read about it in a book once. It’s a way to boost customer morale and overall workplace mindsets. Humans used to do this all the time.”
RiverBot raised an eyebrow behind his dark blue glasses. “Did EfficiencyBot even approve of this?”
“He liked the party last time!” They defended. “And if someone as stuck up as EfficiencyBot can let loose, you can too.”
He groaned in annoyance. His mind was as set as the river’s direction.
However, VacationBot would not take no for an answer. “Please? A party with your co-workers would be perfect for your lonely… surrounded by fishes… life.” They glanced at the water and saw the countless minnows swimming around, along with an occasional salmon and catfish. “RaftBot would be there.”
“Of course RaftBot is there. He’s drawn to social gatherings like [FISH] are to [WORMS].” He huffed and leaned back on his blue and white striped lawn chair. “That gives me more reasons to stay put.” He tossed the invite on the grassy floor beside him.
VacationBot watched the card flutter down to the ground. An annoyed frown formed on their face. “You can’t just stay out here all the time. There’s so many other bots you can form [BONDS] with.” The tour guide pleaded. “I bet there’s some other bot here that likes to fish and… be kind of rude to their fellow employees.”
RiverBot let out a hearty laugh. “I bet there isn’t. I’ve had my conversations with every bot in this forest. They’re just as annoying and talkative as the rest.” His tone went back to its typical roughness. “It’s aggravating."
“There’s more than just Vacation Forest, RiverBot. What about the bots I set you up with at the party for the human? Did any of them stick at all?”
“The PhotoBot siblings kept bickering amongst themselves for me to care. SportsBot disapproved of fishing, like it isn’t some sort of sport because it doesn’t have a ball involved. All BeachBumBot did was sneak some battery acid into their tumbler and HotTubBot doesn’t know how to shut up. I tried to tell them I didn’t care about what they had for [BREAKFAST] and they didn’t listen.” When RiverBot finished counting them off, he shut his eyes as if thinking about it was exhausting.
VacationBot frowned at the bot’s complaints. They recalled the list they made in their memory card. “What about BiologyBot? I assigned them there too.”
RiverBot shrugged. “BiologyBot was fine, I guess. I don’t really have much to say about them.”
“So… would you consider them a friend?”
“Friend? Hah! The only friends I need are a nice, cold drink and fish.” The fisher grabbed their tan bucket hat with a blue rim and pulled it over their screen.
This time, the tour guide let an audible groan escape. “RiverBot, why are you such a [PAIN]? I’m just trying to get the members of the Vacation Simulator to grow close. Like a [FAMILY].” They moved back to look around the woods, noting the different stations and how far apart everything is. “You’re all sort of spread out.”
“Who’s problem is that? Listen, VacationBot, it’s nothing against you and your… celebrations for typical business milestones. It’s the fact I have RaftBot in my family, and that’s more than enough socialization for one cycle.” He tried to focus on the white noise of the river, hoping to ignore VacationBot’s begging.
“Is there nothing I can bring to make you want to come? Not even for an hour or two?”
RiverBot raised his body to look at them. “Does this simulation have the budget to get me a [YACHT]?”
VacationBot paused for a second. Their eyes moved to the water below them. “I–”
“That’s what I thought.” He shifted to a more comfortable position. “I promise you, I’m not the only bot who doesn’t want to go to your tacky party.”
“Not really. BaristaBot and even SunTanBot are going.”
The fisher’s teal screen flashed in amusement. “You think I care? I don’t even like SunTanBot, and he doesn’t like anybody. Now, make like a leaf and let me take a nap.”
VacationBot let out a defeated sigh. “Okay, but can you at least read the card? It’s all custom, dependent on the bot.” They looked at him with their pleading eyes.
“Fine, but you promise to leave me alone after this.” VacationBot nodded in response. RiverBot groaned and leaned over to pick the invitation up. He flipped it open and mumbled the writing aloud to prove he was reading it.
The card was as tacky as this whole simulation. There was glitter, pop-ups, and crude drawings most likely drawn by VacationBot themselves. The penmanship was easy to read and the information was straight to the point. It was a typical party invite–-nothing RiverBot hasn’t thrown away before.
However, there was a little bit of text at the bottom of the card. It could easily be looked over if whoever reading this card was an oblivious human. It only read two words.
Free drinks.
Anyone would assume water, or punch as a party custom. If this was a party thrown by any other bot, it would be true. However, RiverBot knew that the parties VacationBot liked to throw always went above and beyond, with as minimal restrictions as possible.
“What kind of drinks do you plan on serving there?” RiverBot inquired, his eyes gazing up to look at VacationBot. “I doubt BaristaBot is offering to make anything.”
“It’s just some stuff I picked up. Spare Sparkling Battery Acid from the human’s party, a few cocktails I persuaded the staff to whip up. The fancy drinks to show my appreciation to all my workers.” They beamed.
A flicker of hesitation shot through RiverBot’s expression. “You can’t be serious. Actual [ALCOHOL]? On work grounds? How did you even convince EfficiencyBot?”
“Oh, I’m super serious. We don’t need to keep up appearances. There’s no humans around.” A cheeky smile creeped onto their orange screen. “We’re all adultbots here, and I trust ParentBot to monitor their kids.”
As much as RiverBot hated to admit it, a part of his circuit board wanted to go–for the drinks, that is. The only problem was the drinks offered weren’t his tastes. A cocktail was too expensive and champagne was too social. He made up his mind and started to close the card to forget about it.
“I also managed to snag some Reboot Beer.” VacationBot quickly said when they saw him dismiss the card again. “It’s [COLD] and [FRESH] from the pack.” The bot saw RiverBot’s eyes widen a few pixels. They had him hook, line, and sinker.
After consideration, RiverBot made his choice. “I will… think about it.” He grumbled and tucked the invite away in his vest pocket. He looked to see VacationBot on the verge of exploding. “Don’t get your hopes up.”
“I already have!” They giggled and backed away to deliver more colorful cards to their crew. “Hope to see you there, RiverBot. I won’t bother you anymore!”
The fisher watched the tour guide float up the stairs to the other bots in the forest. He let out an exhausted sigh and finally let himself relax. Now, all that was occupying his CPU were the rustle of leaves, the splash of fish in the river, and the taste of a cold drink at some party.
=================
The party started around 7pm, three hours after the museum’s closing on Saturdays. At least, that’s what the invitation said. VacationBot and EfficiencyBot were very indecisive bots. On any other day, RiverBot would be home by now. He often stuck around an hour or two to help clean up as courtesy, but he was also home on his chair by 8pm.
But here he was, his internal clock at 8pm, and algorithmic party music blasting in front of him. He can say no to a lot of things, but he can’t say no to free drinks–no matter how many bots he’d have to tolerate.
It was located in the human’s ex-suite. He assumed it was still vacant, even three days after the simulation allegedly “kicked off.” That or the human went home for the day and the simulation reseted to default. It wasn’t open forever, no matter how convincing it was to humans.
RiverBot wasn’t complaining. The suite was spacey and could easily fit the workers plus a few more. Now with the human–and in result, the “professionalism”–out of the picture, bots weren’t confined to their assigned spots. That was a big selling point of this work party.
Most, if not all, of the bots were already there and letting their code run wild. It was a breath of fresh air to have an authorized party out of character. RiverBot was not as excited as other bots. After all, his script was quite similar to who he was off work.
Though, a party where bots are allowed to do whatever would be interesting for RiverBot to at least watch. It’s not often that bots have complete freedom, especially on work ground.
“Hold on, VacationBot. Are sure this won’t get us in trouble with the Bureau?”
Well, as much freedom with a co-owner like EfficiencyBot.
The fisher hovered closer to the suite’s backdoor. Even from behind the gate, he could already hear the beeping of bots and the blaring party music. As obnoxious as it was, RiverBot tolerated it more than the music made for humans. The colors that radiated from the dance floor made the bot squint temporarily.
“The Bureau doesn’t have to know. We don’t need to tell them everything. This is just for bots to bond outside of their respective destinations. You worry too much, EfficiencyBot.”
He saw the two guides talking amongst themselves behind the screen that covered the dance floor and most of the bots present. VacationBot held a glass of what RiverBot could only assume was champagne. EfficiencyBot stayed sober as expected. RiverBot noticed their attire too. VacationBot’s red bow was loosened slightly and their teal vest had several noticeable wrinkles. EfficiencyBot was the complete opposite. His two piece suit was perfectly tailored and his dark green tie was precisely ironed.
RiverBot did see him holding a small snack from a platter. A main goal for this party was to loosen up after all.
Even without the professional restrictions, he never expected to come back to a sociable shindig like this again, but the lure of supposedly bottomless beverages were stronger than his distaste for the bots around him.
RiverBot’s presence here was just as surprising to the guides. VacationBot was the first one to notice he was there. Their eyes widened and a big smile formed on their screen. “RiverBot!” They exclaimed as they quickly hovered over to greet them. “You’re here! RaftBot said you weren’t coming.”
“Good. Glad to know that bot can listen.” He laughed at his own comment.
EfficiencyBot pulled out his tablet. “Well, now that you’re here, that means almost everyone is at the party. We are close to party perfection.”
The teal bot looked around. He was an hour late; he was sure he would be the last to show up. “Who’s not here yet? SunTanBot?”
“Nope. He was one of the first bots who arrived.” VacationBot clarified as they took a sip of their drink. “He said something about wanting to see what these bots do without a human around. I don’t know, but I’m glad he, and you, could make it!”
RiverBot moved away from his boss crowding him. “Well, I don’t really care who shows up. Tell me where the Reboot Beer is and let me party or whatever.”
VacationBot giggled and gestured inside the suite. “They’re in the mini-fridge. Make sure to have fun and make some friends!”
“Yes, yes.” EfficiencyBot muttered, his screen glued to the device in front of him. “Just be sure to monitor yourself. I have a bot delivering water to everyone every [THIRTY MINUTES].”
The fisher rolled his eyes and hovered away. “I’m a grown bot. I assure you, I know how many cans I can drink.”
When RiverBot floated around the big screen, he was flashed with the life of a party: Loud noises, flashing lights, and lots of bots. There were a handful of bots occupying the dance floor, entranced in each other's presence. It made RiverBot sick to his processor.
Sadly, he had to trudge through the chassis of his coworkers for that break. All he had to do was to slip by them and not draw any unnecessary attention to himself.
This was not written in the code, as one immediately noticed he was there. “Dad! You’re here.”
RiverBot recognized that obnoxiously loud voice from anywhere. Even through the blaring music, their voice was easily heard. He let out a loud groan and turned around to face them. “I told you not to call me that.”
He faced his son. His typical rafting helmet was replaced by a bright pink party hat. One side of him held a small can of L’Aqua Fizz. It was the disgusting confetti flavor. He still wore his hazard orange raft vest and dark gray goggles.
“But we’re not at work nor is the human around.” The bot’s smile on his yellow screen grew bigger. “If I knew you were coming, I wouldn’t have told everyone you weren’t coming.”
“Yes, yes. You don’t need to shout it to the mountain.” RiverBot grumbled as his eyes darted around to the other bots on the dance floor. “What do you want, RaftingBot?”
“I’m just surprised you came. You hate parties. You tell me all the time.”
RiverBot glared at the bots around them. “Well, I’m telling you now that I’m here for a drink.”
RaftBot nodded, their smile growing more. “Maybe you can also make some friends here. We’re allowed to break our code at this party.”
“I’m not doing any of that social-lie-zation you love doing.” His glare turned back to the yellow bot in front of him. “I have no desire to ‘make friends’ or whatever.”
“Come on, Dad. Can’t you make just one? There’s so many bots around.”
RiverBot raised his voice, floating closer to the other bot. “I said, no, RaftBot. I do not need to make friends like I’m some sort of childbot.”
“Okay! Okay, sorry, Dad!” RaftBot backed down, his smile turning nervous and weak. “I’m just glad you're going out again. You haven’t really done that since–”
“Save your voice for someone who wants to listen, boy.” The fisher cut him off rudely. He was eyeing the door inside behind his glasses. “Go talk to that bath bot you tell me about so often.”
RaftBot nodded in agreement. “You’re right. I’m going to go look for them now.” They looked around the dance floor, and saw the blue bot in a bath robe at one of the corners, talking to a yellow-green bot with snow glasses. “Enjoy the party!” RaftBot floated over to his friends.
RiverBot watched him with a hint of disdain on his face. He shook his head and hovered inside the suite.
The human’s now vacant suite was packed with bots from all the destinations. Their gray bodies and bright screens bounced off the pastel orange walls. Several conversations overlapped with each other and there was movement everywhere.
It was way less organized than the human’s initial party. Back then, all the bots had scripts to follow and could only talk when waved too. It was nice, quiet, and uneventful. It’s why he took the job all those years ago.
RiverBot flinched at some bot yelling way louder than the rest before quieting down to whatever this room’s base volume was. It’s been forever since RiverBot went out to a genuine party like this one. A party where bots did whatever they want without human eyes constantly on them.
With a disgruntled sigh, he sped floated to the mini-fridge in one of the corners of the suite. The sign said “Human Non-Work Station.” After he got his drink, he could leave, or at least hang out somewhere without all the annoying chatting. The bots he moved past had drinks of their own: left over champagne, suspicious red cups, and some had wine glasses.
When RiverBot arrived at his bait, there were two bots blocking his path. One wore a red apron with the word “Grill!” embroidered onto it. Instead of a typical hat many bots at this simulator wore, this one only had a red floral bandana covering the upper part of their green screen. The other one was in a full dark gray wet suit that covered all of their visible chassis. Their blue screen was covered by a dark blue dive mask with yellow rims. The two were casually chatting directly in RiverBot’s way.
He's seen these two bots around the simulation before. He never bothered with getting their names.
“Hey.” RiverBot begrudgingly greeted. “Can you two move?”
The two bots turned around and backed away from the fridge. “Oh, sorry. Of course.” The green one said.
The fisher responded with a curt nod. As he opened the door, the one in the wet suit spoke.
“You’re RiverBot, right? Have you seen BiologyBot anywhere?” They asked.
He pulled out a cold can of beer and looked at the bot. “No. Why would I know?” He shut the door.
The bot shrugged. “I thought he would be here. I know he would like the drinks served here, and you two were friends. I mean, you both like sea animals.”
“Correction. I like fish. They like the sea animals.” He scoffed.
The one in the apron spoke up. “I did see you two next to each other at the human’s party. You didn’t look like you hated each other.”
RiverBot turned to them and rolled his eyes. “I don’t hate the bot, but I’m certainly not friends with the bot.”
“Aww, really? You two seemed like you’d be great friends. BiologyBot needs friends after all.”
He squeezed the can, a small crackle coming out of it. “Why does everyone think I need friends?” RiverBot sent a nasty glare towards the bot. “I am not [FIVE CYCLES] old.”
The green bot spoke up. “Woah, hey. DiveBot didn’t mean that in a bad way. It’s just… word gets around?”
“Word gets around? What? Am I known as ‘the lonely old bot by the river?’” He sized them up. He wasn’t going to fight the bot–at least not unprompted. Though, he knew he could easily take them if he had too.
DiveBot gasped and tried to move between the two masculine bots. “No! It’s not a negative thing.”
“Yeah. Many bots are lonely.”
RiverBot stared harshed at the bots in front of him. He didn’t say a word.
“BurgerBot, I don’t think you’re helping.”
“Sorry.”
The two bots backed away from the fisher. He rolled his eyes and floated away. “Listen, I’m sure you two meant no harm, but I am way past the age range for ‘making friends.’” He calmed himself, his screen going back to its unamused default. “In case it wasn’t clear, no. I have not seen BiologyBot.”
DiveBot nodded slowly. “Okay. Thanks anyways.” They apologetically smiled at him.
RiverBot turned and hovered away, the can of beer next to him. He couldn’t tolerate another forced interaction anymore, but bots populated the entire suite, inside and outside. He had to think of one place a bot wouldn’t really want to go, or have no need to hang out in. His eyes drifted across the room and landed on the Human Bathroom. Bots don’t use the bathroom, and it has water where he can relax. Swiftly, he floated past the increasingly loopy bots around him and entered the restroom.
As expected, the place was empty. The room was just as tacky as the outside. The walls were a light blue and the tiles surrounding the tan bath were a brighter cyan. The tub had rims bots could hover over without getting wet, along with a small, cheap beach diorama with plastic palm trees.
The door muffled the noises of conversations, leaving only the hum of an air conditioner. Before doing anything, RiverBot grabbed a towel and tucked it in the window rims to fully block out the party. He moved past the mirror, cracking open the can. He took a quick swig before haphazardly turning on the bath inside the floor.
He took a deep breath and settled himself in the water. He didn’t bother with adjusting the temperature; he liked it cold anyways. Any other bot would be worried about damaging their vents, but RiverBot has submerged himself enough that his body was used to it. He drank the Reboot Beer, placing it on the textured rims of the bath, and let out a long sigh.
His relaxation only lasted 30.23 seconds because there was a noticeable commotion outside, even through the door. RiverBot tried to block it out to the point of increasing the force of the faucet. Alas, it was still loud enough for him to hear snipbits of conversation.
“...Leaving already? You just got here.” Even muffled by the running water, VacationBot’s voice was still recognizable.
There was a pause before a male voice responded back. “I need to publish these fish.” The conversation went back to being unintelligible.
RiverBot instinctively lowered the pressure of the bathtub’s faucet to hear the discussion better.
“Why would you need another job? You already have the Vacation Simulator.”
“It’s not a job, it’s a side hustle. Virtual Geographic contacted me specifically and I can’t let this go.” Their voices got louder and closer to the bathroom door.
“You can’t take the night off at least? I’m sure your findings can wait.”
“No, they can’t ‘just wait.’ These are due [TONIGHT]!” The male voice raised in volume, but was still drowned out by the sounds of a lively party. “I need to figure out what is depicted in these photos or else I’m no better than a BiologyTeacherBot.”
VacationBot stuttered. “Maybe someone here can help you! Basically everyone’s here. One of these bots should be sure to know something about plants.”
“Animals.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said.” The conversation died for a nanosecond. “Like… WildBot! They like animals.”
“Respectfully, I don’t trust that bot near my papers. They’re always gnawing on things.”
“BirdBot?”
The male bot pondered their suggestion. “They could be helpful, but I think their database is limited to avians.”
VacationBot kept trying and throwing ideas and different bots into the air. Everytime it was rejected by the other bot. RiverBot caught onto his eavesdropping and got out of the water temporarily. He wasn’t here to snoop. He was here to get tipsy and relax. He opened the bathroom door, revealing himself to the two bots outside.
“Can you take this somewhere else? I’m trying to forget I’m at a party.” He growled, his eyes narrowing.
He saw VacationBot turn to him. Their eyes lit up, but they didn’t say anything. The other bot was a bot RiverBot did not recognize. Their screen was a similar green to BurgerBot’s, but it was on the bluer side. They wore black glasses that lacked lower rims and a simple white lab coat. RiverBot didn’t dwell on who this bot was or what destination they work at. He just wanted them gone.
“RiverBot?” The one in the coat recognized the fisher. “I didn’t expect you to be here.”
“Me neither!” VacationBot butt in.
“I’m sorry, do I know you? You’re not in Vacation Forest.” RiverBot looked the green bot up and down, trying to find something they recognized about him.
The bot looked taken aback, a slight look of disdain on their face. “Yes? It’s me, BiologyBot. We were stationed together at the party?”
A dawn of recognition appeared on RiverBot's screen. “Oh.” He glanced at VacationBot before back at BiologyBot. “Where’s your… what was it… obnoxious dive helmet?”
BiologyBot rolled his eyes. “You don’t expect me to wear that bulky thing off work, do you? I prefer looser and more open clothes.” He swished his coat around.
RiverBot shrugged. “I don’t know. Bots aren’t really seen out of uniform.”
“Bots also don’t wear big, heavy dive helmets all willy-nilly either.” BiologyBot shot a small glare in his direction.
VacationBot moved closer, looking way more excited than they were before. “You see, BiologyBot, this is a bot who knows his fish.” They gestured to the fisher.
He looked at his boss suspiciously before curtly nodding. “Yes. I do.”
Their smile grew bigger. “Now, RiverBot, do you think you can help us out for a bit?”
RiverBot’s narrowed eyes darted between them and the other bot. He didn’t say a word.
“Great! My friend, BiologyBot, here needs some help with identifying… What was it? Sponges?”
“Fish.”
“Yes! Fish. And I know you are a—the fish bot here. Maybe you can help him out? I promise it will be awesome for both of you.” VacationBot swayed notably and looked at RiverBot with pleading eyes.
He considered their offer. He did like talking about fish and he was okay with BiologyBot. “Have you tried looking it up?”
BiologyBot shook his chassis. “These photos are very poorly taken. I can't even make out what’s in some of them.”
“You said you did not not like BiologyBot, right? Come on. Let your dams flood.” The guide wiggle their eyes at him.
“Oh, yeah.” BiologyBot scoffed and rolled his eyes. “VacationBot, I appreciate the help, but these fish are much more specific than a river salmon.” He glanced at the fisher.
RiverBot’s eyes widened before narrowing more. “You think my knowledge is only limited to this tacky simulation?”
VacationBot’s smile faltered. “Guys, come on. We’re all friends here.” Their screen darted around the party nervously. “You two are tense, maybe you need to loosen up.”
“I don’t need to loosen up, I need this article finished.” The biologist moved back, eyeing the door. “I’m wasting time at this get-together. I’m going home.”
“Fine. If you misidentify those fish and get yourself laid off, don’t come crying to me.” RiverBot sent him a challenging look.
BiologyBot gave the same look back. “I’m sure you know of fish, but these are specific fish. You fisherbots only know the trash fish, like [CARPS].”
The guide tried their best to salvage this situation. “RiverBot knows quite a lot of mammals. Maybe give him a shot? Or two. Or three.” They giggled to themselves.
“Face it, lab boy.” RiverBot smirked to himself. “If you want to get this done, I’m the only bot around who knows anything about fish. Salmons or minnows or whatever you think is a [TRASH FISH].”
With no other choice, BiologyBot folded. “Fine. Let’s see how much you know.”
RiverBot gave him an approving nod. He turned to the door. “Come on.” He entered the bathroom, not bothering to hold the door open for the other bot.
VacationBot’s screen immediately lit up at the hint of them getting along. They squealed. “Yes! You two are going to become such great friends!” She hurried BiologyBot inside the bathroom. “I bet you two are going to get a lot done.”
BiologyBot didn’t get the chance to oppose before he was forced into the room with the door slammed shut. He took a sharp intake of breath and pulled a small laptop from his coat. He placed it on the countertop with the dormant Human Customizer 3000. He turned to see RiverBot back in the tub, a can in one hand and his eyes closed, like he didn’t even know or care BiologyBot was there.
He cleared his vents, enticing a readjustment from the other bot. “So, you said you were going to help me with identifying these fish?”
“Mmm? Yeah. Yeah.” RiverBot’s eyes never opened. “Why are you even struggling with identifying fish? Shouldn’t you already have it in your database?”
BiologyBot turned to him. “I may be a marine biologist, but I specialize in everything other than fish. Think dolphins, eels, seahorses.” He sighed. “Besides, I prefer taking pictures and writing about what’s in the picture.”
RiverBot replied with an uninterested grunt. “Maybe you should learn more about fish.”
BiologyBot frowned. “Are you going to assist me or not? If not, I’ll ask that RaftBot. He’s by the creek a lot.”
Suddenly, his eyes shot open. The suddenly chalant fisher sat up from the water. “There’s no use in getting RaftBot to identify fish. That bot can’t tell a goldfish from a guppy.” He moved across the tub and leaned against the step underneath the water. He raised an unamused eyebrow at the biologist. “What exactly is this picture that's so hard to identify?”
With a sigh, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a grainy blue photo. “I need to know the specific species these animals are for my article.” He handed it to RiverBot. “The research is the easy part. The hard part is figuring what they are and–”
“This is a Thunnus thynnus, also known as an Atlantic Bluefin Tuna.” RiverBot carelessly tossed the photo back to him. “They were a highly prized food fish in human times, often in high-grade sushi markets.”
BiologyBot stared at the bot and picked up the photo. “How–” He glanced back at the paper. “You didn’t just do a reverse image search right? I tried and–”
“Why would I need to do that? That’s a human’s way of identifying fish.” RiverBot leaned back and took a sip from his beer.
“But the photo is so grainy you can barely make out the fish from the water.” They stuttered. “I didn’t even know a fish was there until I was told there was.”
RiverBot’s screen turned into a knowing smirk. “I thought all I knew were trash fish. That doesn’t look like a carp to me, does it?”
BiologyBot paused his vocal processor. He looked away from the bot in the tub. “Okay, maybe you know some fish outside of rivers.” He reached into a coat pocket and pulled out another photo. It was as grainy as the last, maybe more.
RiverBot took a quick glance at the photo. “Selene Brevoortii, or a Mexican Lookdown. It has little commercial value.”
He pulled the photo away and double checked it. “How do you do that? You looked at that photo for [THREE POINT FOUR NINE] seconds.”
“I know fish. How many times do I need to repeat myself?”
“I figured that out. I mean how do you know the exact species of a fish you can barely see? Do you have some sort of modern plugin I’m missing?” BiologyBot looked closer at the photo in front of him.
RiverBot laughed. “To identify fish, you need to know fish. Not just your crabs or your sea turtles.”
BiologyBot frowned. “I do know fish. I just can’t see the fish.”
“When you know fish, you don’t need to see fish.”
The biologist was getting increasingly frustrated with the fisher’s cryptid words, and RiverBot knew it. “If you’re just here to laugh in my face, I might as well leave.”
“That depends. Do you want to know fish?”
“Yes!”
RiverBot took a long drink of his can, finishing it. “Alright.” He crushed it and tossed it in a corner near the bathtub. BiologyBot could hear something being dialed before RiverBot shouted. “RaftBot!”
He was taken aback and looked around, expecting a bot to come through the door. However, he heard a voice come from RiverBot’s screen. “Yeah, Dad?”
The fisher let out a small groan. “Go to the river and catch me a fish.”
RaftBot replied enthusiastically. “Okay! What kind?”
“Any kind you can catch. Bring it to me in the human’s bathroom.” He paused. “And grab me a few beers too.” RiverBot hung up and leaned back into the water. “Give it about… five minutes. The kid’s fast.”
BiologyBot blinked slowly. “Why are you getting a fish? I told you, these are marine fish.”
“You’re getting to know a fish. Didn’t you ask to learn how to do it?” He let out an unbothered exhale. “This is how I learned. Fish are fish at the end of the day.”
Suddenly, there was a knock on the bathroom door. RaftBot peeked inside. “Dad? Are you here?”
“Yes, I’m here. Where else would I be?” He hovered out of the water and approached him. “Where’s the fish?”
“Right here!” His son tossed him a purple catfish.
RiverBot easily caught it, preventing it from squirming too much. It was a simulated fish, but it still had some form of consciousness. He inspected the animal, turning it around, before throwing it into the water of the bathtub. It landed with an elegant splash. “Good. And the drinks?”
“I got you a six pack. It’s still cold and everything.” RaftBot grunted and held up the drinks.
The father nodded in approval and took the weight off him. He held it without a sweat. “It’s nice to know you can do something right.”
RaftBot smiled. “That means a lot coming from you, Dad!”
“I know.” He gestured with his body to shoo him away. “Now scurry off and enjoy the party. I know I will.”
The yellow bot closed the door. RiverBot moved past BiologyBot and placed the beers on the counter. He ripped the plastic open and grabbed one. “You want any?”
BiologyBot snapped out of his trance and shook his head. “No, no. I don’t really drink.”
RiverBot peered at him before shrugging and snapping the tab off. He floated back into the water, startling the fish.
BiologyBot continued to stare in confusion. He went over to the floor tub and leaned over to look at the scaly creature. Its purple scales glimmered with the surface of the water, the lighter triangles providing a contrast to its darker body. It swam in circles, looking for an exit that didn’t exist. It was hard to tell if it actually was freaked out due to its big round beads that imitated eyes. Their whiskers twitched in curiosity.
He looked up at RiverBot, who was watching the bewildered fish with a small smirk on his screen. “Looking at a fish is going to help me figure out what three pixels in a blue background is?”
After a few moments of silence broken by the splashing of water, RiverBot spoke. “Tell me, BiologyBot, do you know what kind of fish this is?”
“Yeah. That’s a [CATFISH]. The human gave me a picture of one once.” He grumbled the next part under his breath. “Even though I made it explicitly clear I was looking for marine creatures.”
RiverBot rolled his eyes. “Do you know what species of catfish it is?”
The biologist paused. “Uhm… a purple catfish. I don’t think there is a purple catfish, at least not one that bright color.” He observed the fish harder, in hopes he could datamine some answer.
“Of course you don’t know.” The teal bot let out a hearty laugh. “It’s a simulated fish that humans can comprehend. It’s not going to have a species besides its name in the simulator’s file. That’s name is ‘purple_catfish.obj’ in case you were curious.”
“Then what is the point of this? You can’t just bring a fish in here, say it’s fake and that it doesn’t matter, and expect me to understand it to get this paper finished.” BiologyBot yelled, his wave mouth increasing in height.
RiverBot let the bot ramble before continuing. “You didn’t know that though.” He leaned back in the water. “You only saw it. A purple catfish, like you said.”
“Your point?”
The fisher took a peek inside the beer he was drinking. “My point is that if you’re going to identify fish from blurry photos, you need to know the fish on a deeper level.” In a flash, he grabbed the fish. He tilted it and poured some of the liquid into its mouth. With a small “poof,” the fish’s color turned from purple to orange. Its patterns shifted from a repeating triangle pattern to a darker striped one on a whim.
“Is that safe? I don’t think fish should be consuming alcohol.”
“Ahh, don’t get your wires in a twist. We’re still in a simulation, even if it’s technically ‘inactive.’” He let go of the animal and let it swim freely again. “Now, tell me about this fish.”
BiologyBot’s expression turned dumbfounded. “It’s the same catfish, but [ORANGE]. Its file name is probably something like ‘orange_catfish.obj’ like its purple counterpart.”
“There you go again. You’re looking at what you see.”
“Oh, for [MAKING A LOUD DISPLEASED NOISE] out loud!” BiologyBot leaned down to try and grab the fish himself. The fish swiftly moved out of the way, swimming to the other side of the tub. The sudden movement caught him off guard and he almost fell into the water. The splash got on his coat and the lower half of his chassis. “Eek! It’s cold. How are you casually floating in this?”
RiverBot guffawled at the bot’s stumble. “I spend most of my time in a cold river, no bulky suits involved.” He kept his eyes on him as he grabbed the fish from the water without looking. “Still, you’re not getting it. Come here.”
“Well, you’re not being specific enough. What does it mean to ‘know a fish?’” The biologist hovered to the sides, trying not to get wetter than he already was, and moved to RiverBot’s side.
“You say you know fish, but do you know them? Do you know them on a deeper, personal level than just the color of their scales?” RiverBot talked of the fish fondly, moving it around to enunciate the slim shine of its texture. He pushed the animal in front of BiologyBot’s screen. “Here. Hold it.”
BiologyBot flinched and hovered back. “No way. I’m not a fish handler. I study fish, not touch them.”
“Okay. Then, I guess you’ll never know a fish.” RiverBot shrugged and tossed the creature back in the bath. “Good luck on your article.”
“Fine!” BiologyBot interrupted. “I’ll hold the fish.”
“Too late. You have to catch it now.” He smirked at the green bot.
“What? I cannot catch a fish.”
“If RaftBot can do it, any bot can. Go on. The tub isn’t that big.”
BiologyBot looked down at the catfish swimming gently in the water. He glanced back at RiverBot, who knew exactly what he was doing. He let out a pathetic groan and leaned in. It was hard to tell where he was grabbing, but it was obvious he was missing.
“Your technique is wrong.” The fisher corrected. “Put your battery into it.”
“I’m putting as much battery as my code allows.” BiologyBot snapped back. The sound of uneven splashing water gave the implication a toddler was playing in it, even if it were two bots and a fish.
“No, no. You’re scaring the fish. It’s going to be more skittish if you keep this up.”
BiologyBot glared at the bot in front of him. “You’re in the tub. Of course it’s going to be skittish.”
“I am making statistically less splashes than you are.” He raised an eyebrow at him. “All I’ve done is float here.” A devious smirk formed on his teal screen. “Maybe you’d have to get in to catch it.”
“My job consists of me submerged entirely in water the entire time I’m on the clock. That's why I wear that stupid suit.” He let out an irritated huff. “The last thing I want to do is willingly go in water, simulated or not.” He tried again, but the fish moved away. Its fan posing as its tail sprayed a dash of water at him. He let out a short scream.
RiverBot watched the biologist struggle to catch the slippery thing. “Your loss.” He drank the remnants of his beer can, tossing the crushed up tin at the same corner. “I’m getting another beer.” He floated up and moved to the pack.
BiologyBot looked up from his failing attempts. “Isn’t this your third can?”
“It would be my fifth if I wasn’t distracted by you flopping around like some kind of fish.” He laughed under his breath. Only he found the joke funny.
Finally, a slosh of the bathwater indicated BiologyBot tried once again. This time, he managed to snag the orange catfish. He yanked it out of the water. “Yes! I did it.” He grunted and tried to get the animal under control. “What now?”
RiverBot’s eyes widened at BiologyBot’s success. “Wow. Alright, here’s what you need to do.” He reached over and grabbed an unopened can and a blue Teeth-Brusher 3000 he found lying around. He entered the water to look at the fish eye level. “You need to relieve your tension.”
He gave him an exhausted look. “Do I need to find YogaBot now?”
“Nah. You need to drink this.” He held the closed Reboot Beer in front of him. “Come on, it’s the good kind.”
He glanced at the can before going back to the fisher. “I told you before, I don’t drink.”
“That’s not what DiveBot said.”
BiologyBot groaned. “Of course it was DiveBot.” He yelped as the catfish started squirming again. He dunked it into the water before pulling it out. “Listen, I’ve had my fair share of [ALCOHOL] but it’s not something I indulge in daily, only special events or when I’m offered. I don’t have very much tolerance for it.”
“Learning about fish is pretty special to me. I was twelve cycles old when I was taught about knowing fish. I was almost eaten by my first one.” He brushed off the memory. “And I’m offering this to you. I’m not the type of bot who likes sharing.”
“I guess.” BiologyBot moved the fish and took the can from him. “Can you…”
RiverBot nodded and flicked the tab open for him. He took a sip and placed it on the bathtub rim. “Thanks.” The biologist finally noticed the device he was holding next to him. “What’s with the toothbrush?”
“If you don’t want me to use it, fine.” He tossed it to the side and approached the fish. “Now, I assume you know the parts of a fish, but if you hold it like this by putting the pressure here and here…”
BiologyBot watched in puzzlement as RiverBot continued to mumble to himself. The fish didn’t look any different and RiverBot’s instructions were as hard to read as the photos that started this. Even the fish was unsure of what was going on. Suddenly, it clicked in his CPU on what RiverBot meant. “Can we get the toothbrush back?”
“Hah. Yeah, sure.” He turned to grab the device. As he did, BiologyBot took a few more drinks from his can, never letting go of the fish. “Alright.” He hovered back to his spot, Teeth-Brusher 3000 by his side. “You need to know what a fish likes to start knowing it. Think of it like another bot.” He pointed the bristles below the fin. “Apply your ring pressure [HERE]—they like that.”
“Uh, okay.” When BiologyBot did so, the fish made a squeak. “Was that a good thing?”
“Ohh. It liked that.” RiverBot nodded. “Press here.” He directed to a spot on its dorsal.
The fish made another squeak, but it was different from the last one. It started struggling against BiologyBot. He grunted and tried to keep it still. “I don’t remember learning this at all, and I’ve been studying marine animals for a long time.” He submerged it to keep it wet before bringing it back out.
RiverBot sighed. “You’re still tense. You’re thinking too hard about it.”
“Of course I’m thinking about it. I feel like I’m doing more than just ‘knowing’ the fish.” BiologyBot felt the catfish squirm again. He readjusted and finished the Reboot Beer can. He threw it in the designated empty cans corner. “Can you get me another can? I would myself, but I can’t right now.”
RiverBot sighed and moved out. He tossed the can towards the green bot. It landed in the water, which the biologist fished out and placed it on the rim before opening it. RiverBot hovered back in the tub. “That’s the point. You need to make the fish happy.” He leaned in closer.
“It’s a fish fabricated for human entertainment. I think these things can only be happy.” He fought against the slippery animal.
“Look at you, seeing things surface level again. I’ve spent my entire job here with these things. I assure you, these fish feel a lot of things besides its default happy.” He tapped BiologyBot’s glasses with the brush. “Focus now. Do you feel the fish?”
“Yes, I feel the fish. Quite a lot actually.” He grunted and moved the fish around to calm it. “I bet it feels me too.”
“You need too– No, you have— The fish is going to–” RiverBot tried his best to communicate to the struggling biologist, but his commands were ignored. He let out a frustrated growl.
BiologyBot was stuck in his own processor; he didn't hear the movement of water. His frustration increased as he wrestled with the fish in front of him. Right before he was about to drop it, the catfish’s struggles slowed. It’s overworking machinery calming to a steady rate. BiologyBot knew he wasn’t doing this, nor that he could.
Then, he heard a deep satisfied purr.
All of a sudden, BiologyBot became hyperaware of the bathroom he was still in, and of the presence to his left. He felt someone’s coarse jacket brush against his coat, the cold wet metal of their chassis touching his own. The warmth of their processor mixed with the air that came out of his. He felt something press on the fish, the same place where his rings were. BiologyBot’s eyes moved beside him, and he saw RiverBot. RiverBot didn’t say a word. His own gaze focused on calming the fish. He was at an angle to make sure he could still see the fish even with the indented screen all bots had.
Still, they were so close. BiologyBot could hear the soft hum of RiverBot’s teal screen. His gaze moved to the bot next to him, hoping for an answer. The bathroom was eerily quiet, with the only noise in the air being the fish’s hinges moving and the whirl of fans in the two bots. The Teeth-Brusher 3000 was left forgotten in the water.
BiologyBot didn’t know if it was his own CPU or the beer taking control, but he didn’t move. He didn’t really want to move either. There was something… comforting about RiverBot’s presence. BiologyBot was always a collected and professional bot, but this felt different. It felt personal and rare. The soft noise from inside RiverBot and the rhythmic sloshing of the water made a pleasing combination for BiologyBot’s audio processor.
RiverBot didn’t seem to notice their sudden closeness nor the sudden gentleness of the room. Now, he was the one focused on the fish, who managed to calm it down in both of their grips. RiverBot is not a sentimental bot, nor a touchy one, but this one time he let himself loosen up. He wanted to let BiologyBot know him.
After a comfortable silence, RiverBot finally spoke up. “BiologyBot.” His voice was quiet, gentle even.
BiologyBot’s fans skipped a beat. His eyes moved to the bot beside him. “Yes, RiverBot?”
RiverBot’s screen was still focused on the fish. BiologyBot could feel the pressure move, like if he was rubbing it gently. “Have you… kissed a fish before?”
“I’m sorry, what.”
Just like that, all the tension fizzled out pathetically. BiologyBot’s processor reset and he remembered the situation the two were in. He hovered away to make some distance between the two bots, though he was still holding the orange fish. He readjusted his glasses and made sure he heard the bot correctly.
RiverBot noticed his sudden movement and finally looked up at him. “I’m asking if you kissed a fish before. How straightforward do I need to be?”
BiologyBot stuttered an answer. “No? Have you?”
“Yeah.”
They stared at each other with their default expression. The biologist was the first one to speak up. “Why would you kiss a fish?”
RiverBot rolled his eyes. “I’m sorry, who here knows fish again?”
“How does kissing them relate to knowing them?” BiologyBot got a response, which was just RiverBot’s knowing look. “Wait, that’s what you meant?”
The fisher stayed silent.
BiologyBot looked at the fish in front of them. It glanced up at him, like it knew what he had to do. “I am not–” He paused and turned to the opened laptop on the counter. It was in sleep mode due to its inactivity, but it was still there. The photos were still unidentified and the article was still unfinished. He hid his pride and took the fish from RiverBot.
He lifted the fish up to his screen. He took a long look into its dark soulless eyes. It's like they knew everything but nothing at the same time. They seemed to hold all his secrets but only told lies. If he looked deep enough, he could see a reflection of his own screen. His own eyes gazing back at him. The bright orange scales picked up on the fluorescent bathroom lights, reflecting some of it on his green screen. The darker stripes also shimmered with the water still on the fish.
Reluctantly, his attention moved to the fish’s lips. These fish were modeled to always have their lips puckered, as humans usually depicted fish in their media. It couldn’t produce salvia, like any of the bots at the simulator, but the water from the bath lingered on the rims of it. The hollow mouth led nowhere. It was no different than kissing a book.
Still, the bot hesitated. It was all on him now. Whatever he did next was completely his decision.
Slowly, he pulled the fish towards his screen. The cold, hard lips of it touched the warmth of his screen. It wasn’t as bad as BiologyBot expected for the first second.
Then the fish made a smooch noise.
BiologyBot yelped and chucked the fish back in the water. It landed with a sploosh and swam around in the tub like nothing happened. BiologyBot erratically moved away from the fish, his internal processor working overtime to prevent him from overheating. “Ew! Ewewewewew!” He shook himself despite nothing really leaving a mark.
Across the tub, RiverBot bursted into laughter. It was the most lively BiologyBot has ever seen RiverBot. For a moment, BiologyBot forgot that this was the same bot who sat by the river alone, who avoided any conversation with any bot, who called his dive helmet obnoxious even though it clearly was. For once, BiologyBot saw RiverBot for who he really was, who he didn’t want other bots seeing.
But why?
“Oh, I totally made you kiss that fish. Do you really think that’s what I meant by knowing it personally?”
That’s why.
“What?” BiologyBot glared at RiverBot. “I didn’t have to do that?”
RiverBot calmed down and took a deep breath. “Nope.”
The biologist made unidentifiable noises from his audio processor. He couldn’t comprehend being duped so hard by RiverBot. “Did I have to do any of this?”
“That depends.” RiverBot leaned back. “Tell me about the fish.”
“That is an orange variant of the catfish model v.1.2.” BiologyBot hissed. “It was transformed with a can of Reboot Beer from its purple counterpart, which was originally a green color. Its model's official name is [CATFISH DOT VACAY SIM DOT]...” He trailed off, eyes widening. “I… know the fish.”
RiverBot gave him a nod. “You know the fish.”
“How do I know the fish? So, the kissing, the touching, the beer! It was all…” BiologyBot started laughing. He didn’t know how to handle this so he did all he was able to do.
The fisher laughed along with a small chuckle. The two giggled amongst themselves for a minute before calming down.
BiologyBot inhaled and looked at RiverBot. “Seriously, though. How does that even work? There must be some form of code or maybe some sort of cheat.”
He shook his head. “You want to know a fun fact about simulations? These fish have a special [QR CODE] engrained on their lips.” He plucked the fish from the water and held it in the bot’s direction. BiologyBot involuntarily flinched. “When bots scan it, which looks like kissing, they get their data. I think it was easier for the developers.”
The biologist stared dumbfoundedly. “Really? Who would… When did you figure that out?”
RiverBot shrugged. “Maybe three–four–days after I got a job here. It’s quite fascinating personally.”
“You kiss fish? Daily?”
“Not daily, but I got to show some appreciation to the ones I catch.” He looked at the catfish swimming aimlessly in the tub fondly. “They deserve love too.”
BiologyBot snickered and looked down at the fish too. “That’s nice. You know, showing all machinery love, even if others overlooked them.” They hovered in silence. The soft warbling of their hover rings and small waves caused by the fish filled the air. A small frown creeped onto his face. “Maybe I should apologize to DiveBot.”
RiverBot turned to him. “What for?”
“Well, they’re very… passionate about music.” His voice turned softer, sadder even. “They’re the only bot down there, and we don’t get a lot of humans talking to us. Sometimes they try to make conversation to keep the place lively, but I never gave them a chance.” He sighed. “I think I should be a bit nicer to them. They’re all I have down there after all.”
RiverBot stared back at the water; his expression turned sadder. “Yeah. Maybe I should too.” He didn’t sound like he was talking to him directly.
The biologist turned to the bot. “What do you mean?”
He didn’t respond immediately. He stood up straight and looked at the corner with the empty beer cans. “Let’s finish your article. It’s getting [LATE].” He hovered out of the tub and towards the counter.
BiologyBot took one last look at the catfish before grabbing the mostly full beer can and following behind. “Are you saying I still can’t know fish?”
“It takes years to know fish as much as I know them.” He floated beside the computer. “Now, how many photos do I need to explain to you?”
He brushed off his lab coat and reached into one of its inside pockets. He grabbed three more photos. “Here. I got [TWO] more hours; I got time.”
The fisher understood and laid the photos on the counter. They weren’t as hard to read as the last ones, but the slight water damage made it a small challenge. He took a squint at the photos and grabbed the purple Comb 3000 to point. “You see these lighter, almost clear pixels. The general size of the fish indicates it’s a Tropical Two-wing Flyingfish, also known as Exocoetus Volitans. They’re not often targeted by commercial fishers back then.”
BiologyBot nodded along. “You know a lot about commercial fishing.”
RiverBot raised an eyebrow at him. “I’m a fisher. What did you expect? I catch fish to look at their eggs?”
He looked away sheepishly. “I guess I never thought about it that way.”
“You need to surface more.”
“I would if my job let me.”
RiverBot continued to point out and explain what these fish are and how much they sold for back when capitalism was still a thing. Unlike his brief facts at the beginning of the night, he went into more detail about them. BiologyBot intently listened while he typed away on the computer. He didn’t have much of a use for their commercial value for his article about ocean life, but the details were still a good thing to keep in his memory card. Even after kissing a fish, he didn’t fully understand how RiverBot did it, but maybe one day he’ll know.
After identifying the last blurry photo, RiverBot leaned back and finished his fourth can. “Well, my job here is done. It’s getting late anyways. We have work tomorrow.”
“Yeah, of course.” BiologyBot closed his laptop and tucked it away along with the photos. “I can finish the rest at home. I got all the data I need.”
“I need to go find RaftBot. That kid’s probably gotten himself into some sort of trouble.” He paused and looked around the bathroom. “How long have we been here? [FOUR] hours?”
“Something like that.” BiologyBot peeked at the door. The towel has been obstructing their view since they entered. “I wonder if the other bots are handling it well.”
The fisher shrugged and hovered towards it. “With a bot like EfficiencyBot in charge? I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
The music was still loud, but the conversation seemed to have died down. When RiverBot opened the door, the suite looked like a mess. A lot of the bots have left, but many of them were just laying on the floor in sleep mode or low battery charge on their screens. Hats and glasses covered every surface and streamers hung on flimsy tape from the ceiling. Cans and bottles, full and empty, scattered across the rug. Thankfully, this could be fixed with a soft reset, but it was surprising to both of the bots to see the simulation like this. They knew it was unprofessional, but they never expected it to spiral this bad.
BiologyBot found their boss, EfficiencyBot, laying on the steps to the suite’s Human Game Room. His glasses were skewed and the tie basically fell off. His coat was nowhere to be seen. His darker green screen was a black void. A small but noticeable stream of smoke floated from the corners of the screen. He was barely recognizable and nothing like the bot at the start of the party. “Hey, RiverBot?” BiologyBot turned to the fisher. “Is there water in the mini-fridge?”
RiverBot glanced at the Non-Work Station and floated over, avoiding the passed out bodies of his coworkers. Besides the blue fridge was VacationBot’s sleeping body and an opened bottle of Sparkling Battery Acid next to her. He ignored her and opened the door to grab two bottles of Naturally Artificial Water. He tossed one to BiologyBot and floated over EfficiencyBot's inactive body. “Hm. I guess everyone loosened up at this party.”
BiologyBot nodded and pulled off the cap. He dumped the cold water onto the bot. The screen turned on, revealing a blue reboot screen. After thirty seconds of waiting, EfficiencyBot’s face flickered back to its typical green. “Ugh… I am never letting EvanBot let loose again…” He groaned, not bothering to move yet. “What time is it?”
“It’s [ONE AM], EfficiencyBot.” BiologyBot stated. This news immediately alerted the guide as he shot up.
“What?? 1am?” He looked around the messy suite anxiously. “I need to reset the simulation now!” He took a breath and glared. “Where’s VacationBot?”
RiverBot gestured to the mini-fridge. “I saw them passed out next to the drinks. Must’ve had three whole bottles.”
EfficiencyBot yelped and sped off to wake up the museum’s curator. BiologyBot noticed RiverBot’s other water bottle. “Is that for you?”
“Nah. I don’t need to drink off my hangovers.” He looked around and floated to the dance floor outside. “This is for RaftBot.”
The biologist followed closely behind. “RaftBot? He drinks?”
“With whatever his friend makes, he basically does.” RiverBot laughed and opened the glass doors.
The dance floor was in the same state as the suite. The music overshadowed the regrets of the bots hearing it. They spotted several of their coworkers from the destinations they work at. The simulation’s sky was a dark purple with imitated stars. The party lights turned off sometime when the two were in the bathroom.
RiverBot scanned the outside before landing on his son. He was in a pile with two other bots, all sleeping peacefully. His party hat was on his screen and his goggles were on the bot with the bath towel around their waist. They were all overheating from their processors being so close and the alcohol running through their systems. Their screens weren’t black, but it was clear they weren’t exactly present either.
The fisher let out a tired sigh and floated down to RaftBot’s height. “Hey, RaftBot? Are you there?” He poured some of the water onto the bot’s screen.
The rafter whirled, his eyes blinking slowly. “Dad..? Is that you?” It was a rare moment of his voice being quiet and calm.
“Yeah. It’s me, son. Now, get up. It’s time to go home.” RiverBot helped the yellow bot up, supporting his weight easily.
RaftBot mumbled. “Five more minutes…”
“Okay, fine. Five more minutes.” RiverBot carried RaftBot next to him, periodically pouring water on his chassis.
BiologyBot watched in fascination before clearing his vents. “Well, I guess this is where we say farewell.”
The fisher nodded. “Yep. It was nice getting to know you.” He laughed shortly. “I don’t know if they’ll ever host a party like this again.” He peeked through the glass door to see the wreckage of the party.
“I’m sure they’ll work it out. They always do.” BiologyBot looked back at the bot in front of him. “Doesn’t mean we can’t hang out after hours.”
RiverBot readjusted the bot next to him and gave BiologyBot a small smirk. “Or during hours. Feel free to visit. Your vents probably need some fresh, simulated forest air after being in that fish bowl for so long. You’re at the bottom of the ocean; I’m pretty sure the humans wouldn’t care if you were gone.”
BiologyBot feigned surprise. “Wow. You’re actually asking me to visit you? Is this what RiverBot is like when he’s [INTOXICATED]?”
“Hah, hah. The offer is slipping off the table now.” He turned and floated towards Vacation Forest. “Besides, I get drunk from at least ten cans.” He quietly chuckled to himself and left.