Archive of Our Own ^beta

🐺

It was quiet.

Too quiet.

For one, everyone was home. And – two – it was the group’s day off. Plus – three – there were 4 littles in the household.

Therefore – it’s scheduled regression day. And if Chan thinks it’s too quiet, then it’s too quiet. He was expecting to be woken up with someone on top of him, at least next to him, but nobody is in his bed. Not even his room.

Not that he could see very much though, the light was off and curtains still drawn. Chan knew he was being forced into sleeping longer, but he couldn’t get back into a rhythm. With a groan, he sat up.

Then the door opens.

“Channie-hyung…”

“Yeah sweetheart?”

“Are ewephants twrees?”

Trust Seungmin to be asking the important questions at whatever time it is in the morning. At least the sun is up, peaking through the curtains. At least he was awake and talking and happy. And honestly, at least Seungmin let himself regress.

“No, elephants aren’t trees Minnie.” Chan swings his legs round to stand up. “Where are the rest of you, hm?”

“I… Wha’?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about it. Go play, alright? I’ll be out soon.”

The little toddles back to the living area, Chan watching through the open door from his bed. “Cute,” he whispers to himself before standing up and receiving the shock of his life.

Minho’s sat in the corner of the room, huddled in some blankets, staring at him.

Glaring, actually.

“Um. Hi…” Chan cautiously approaches, noting the lack of words as he crouches down. “You feeling small?” Minho shuffles, uncomfortable with the directness of that question, but continues to hold his stone-cold gaze strongly.

“No.”

“Hmm, I think you are.”

“Don’ wanna.”

Chan sits down properly, watching for any signs of extreme discomfort. Minho gives him none. “Min… It’s ok to be feeling small today. That’s what today is for.” They literally plan this, so they can all have some time, so the littles can all regress and cope with stress in a more controlled environment. “You want help?”

“No. I… don’t wanna.”

He’s normally stubborn about it. “Alright. But you let me know, ok?” Chan gives him a few seconds to respond. He doesn’t. “Baby, if you need anything, you let Channie-hyung know. Can you do that?” Minho nods, dropping his eyes finally.

“Do you know where the others are?” He shrugs. Chan sighs, then smiles sympathetically, still half asleep though so it probably seems less than convincing. Minho isn’t even looking at him, so it doesn’t matter all that much.

After shoving some clothes on his body, opening his bedroom door properly and exiting, Chan’s met with what he was expecting.

Chaos.

Controlled chaos! But chaos. Pens littering the floor, colouring pages half complete and toys cosplaying as trip hazards. Blankets and pillows everywhere, the TV on low volume of some random kids show and a selection of snacks on the table.

Changbin’s sat on the couch, holding a clearly upset Felix. Chan doesn’t even bother asking, trusting that everything is under some form of control and walking into the kitchen.

It’s a little tidier than expected, only some food scattered and dishes piled up. “Morning,” Hyunjin says absentmindedly. “You sleep good?”

“Yeah. Is Lixie ok?”

“Oh. Yeah. Sungie’s in timeout for that.”

“For what?”

Seungmin pops up out of nowhere, stating, “Sungie hit Lixie.” Hyunjin spun around to do the all too common gesture of do not trust him, he doesn’t know the details and Chan simply laughs. “‘S no’ funny, hitting i’n’t funny.”

“Yeah, hitting isn’t funny. That’s right Minnie, well done.” Seungmin smiles, returning happily to his book. Chan did a headcount as he wandered towards the sink. “Where’s Jeongin-ah?”

“Innie went out to buy food. Changbin’s got Lixie, I’ve got Minnie, the baby’s meant to be in your room?”

“Yeah, he’s being—”

“Stubborn, yeah. I know. Yelled at me.”

“I’m sorry.”

Chan placed his hands on Hyunjin’s shoulders, massaging gently to try and relieve any stress he could’ve prevented by being awake. The younger turned it into a hug, sinking back into the touch and moving Chan’s hands around his waist. “You’re doing well though. Everyone’s matched up. I assume Sungie wanted to be alone?”

“Yeah.” Hyunjin turns around in his arms to face him better. “Did you sleep ok?” Chan nods, because he did, and he appreciated the extra few hours where the other three caregivers took over.

They were interrupted by a small poke on Chan’s back. “I wan’ ‘ug.” Seungmin had a blanket wrapped around his head and a selection of plushies in his arms. Hyunjin giggled lightly. “Wha’?”

“Nothing, you’re just cute Minnie. Group hug?”

“Yeah, puppy, c’mere.”

“Oks.” Seungmin waddled his way into the middle, sandwiched between Chan and Hyunjin. “Squwish!” And, as commanded, the older pair squeezed themselves around the little until he started to giggle.

They stayed like that for some time, Seungmin beaming and happily laughing at the occasional tightening of the squished hug. Then he started to wriggle. “All done?” A quick nod, and they both let him go.

The next concern Chan had was Jisung, considering how long he’d been on his own. “Where’s Sungie?” Hyunjin’s facial expression changed to one of guilt.

“In his room. I-I think? I did tell him he could come out already.”

“That’s alright, he’s allowed to sulk a little.” Jisung was always one for sulking… or at least wanting the other person to ask if he’s ok first. Little or big, he doesn’t go out of his way to find someone when upset. “I’ll go check on him, yeah?”

“Channie…”

“Yeah sweetheart?”

“I wanna come too…”

“Hmm. That’s fine, but Sungie gets final say in that, ok?”

“Mmm, ok…”

Chan turned to Hyunjin, the younger mouthing, “Good luck.” The oldest smiled in return, taking Seungmin’s hand and walking them away. Then he paused.

“Hold on, you told Jeongin to buy us all food?”

🐿️

The door squeaked open, Jisung hiding himself further under his covers at the sound.

“Sungie? You in here?”

“No…”

“Hmm… It’s Channie-hyung and Minnie, can we come in kiddo?”

He didn’t mean to hit Felix. It just happened. A lot of things tend to just happen when Jisung is involved and he’s starting to dislike it. He’s meant to be a big boy, he’s meant to be good. But he’s always the one in trouble.

“We’re coming in, yeah?”

“Nooo…”

Chan knows too much, because he sits down on Jisung’s bed and pokes him through the blanket. “What’s going on, hm?” He doesn’t answer, just pouts and tries to not sniff. “You’re allowed to come out, you know…”

“No.”

“Sungie. You made a mistake, that’s ok.”

“Mmmmno. Not ok.”

Hitting isn’t ok. Even if Felix stole the pen and even if he was really upset and even if Binnie-hyung said it was his turn with the pen and even if he didn’t hit him that hard. Hitting isn’t ok.

“We learn from mistakes bug, it’s all fine now.” But it’s not fine! It’s bad. “Can you come out so I can see you?” He shook his head from under the blanket. “We don’t need to leave the room yet, just me, you and Minnie. Ok?”

As long as they don’t need to leave…

Slowly, Jisung moved the blanket down to cover only half of his face. “Hi kiddo.” Seungmin is on the floor, staring up at him. “Do you want Minnie to go?”

“I’s ok…”

“You want him to go?”

“No, wan’ Minnie to stay.”

Seungmin smiles, then resumes whatever tapping game he’s playing with the floorboards. Jisung wants to play too, tap tiny finger pads in different rhythms until he gets bored. It sounds fun! But he’s sulking, so he has to keep sulking. Until the icky feelings go away.

“Sungie, you wanna tell me what happened?”

“He took my pen.”

“Ahh, ok. Is that why you hit Lixie?”

Jisung pulls the blanket over his head again, feeling tears well up. “Bug… It’s alright, I… I’m not mad at you. Ok?” That doesn’t make it better.

He curls himself up under the blanket, hiding his body but letting the top of his head peak out. Seungmin looks up at him, asking, “Sungie, did ‘ou mean ‘o hi’ Lixie?” And Jisung didn’t know how to respond.

Because, yes, he meant to. “Yeh…” But he didn’t want to hurt him! He just wanted the pen back! He wanted the pen that was by the law of Binnie-hyung’s opinion his pen. “Bu’ I didn’ wanna hurt him… I wan’ed the pen back…” And at that moment, hitting seemed like the best option.

“Were you playing too rough, bug?”

“Didn’ mean toooooo—”

“Hey, I know. I know you didn’t mean to, but you did it still.”

Actions have consequences. “Dats why I’m in here. Because I been bad, I got timeout…” Jisung doesn’t like timeout, but he gets it a lot. He’s older than the other 3 littles, he plays too rough sometimes. A lot of the time. “Promise I didn’ mean to.”

“I know, I believe you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, Sungie, I believe that you didn’t mean it.”

“Hmm, oks. Sowwy…”

“You ap… Apowogishe ‘o Lixie,” Seungmin says with all the confidence in the world. “Di’ I say i’ wight?”

“Apologise? Yeah, you said it right, good job pup.” Seungmin smiles, watching Chan with happy eyes. It makes Jisung sad, he wants to feel happy like that too. “And Sungie? You don’t need to apologise to me. Like Minnie said, you need to apologise to Lixie.” He doesn’t want to do that though, he wants to stay in bed and hide. He feels better in bed.

“No.”

“Jisung—”

“No! I don’ wanna.”

“Why don’t you want to apologise, bug? Hm?”

Because he’s scared. He doesn’t want Felix to hate him, and that feeling is worse after he apologises. If Felix doesn’t accept Jisung’s apology, then what was the point in apologising?

“Don’ wan’ Lixie to hate me…”

“Kiddo, Lixie won’t hate you.”

“But… What if he does?”

Chan sighs. “You don’t know until you try.” But he doesn’t want to know. “So, when you’re ready, we’re going to find Lixie, and you’re going to apologise. Yeah?” Jisung shakes his head. “Why not?”

“Because that’s scary… I don’ like scary things. I can jus’ stay in here?”

“No, bug, you need to apologise.”

“Hmph. Don’ wannaaa.”

Jisung hides himself again. “I know you don’t want to. Thank you for telling me that, Sungie, that’s important to tell me.” He sniffs and feels tears fall. “But we still have to apologise when we do something wrong. Ok?” A whine leaves his lips, Chan instantly moving closer for a hug. “Come here, baby, it’s ok.”

“Mmmm, I don’ wanna say sorry,” Jisung complains, again, and shuffles out of his blanket cocoon to snuggle into Chan’s side. “It’s scary, Channie-hyung, I-I don’ like i’. Sungie doesn’t like i’, don’ wanna.” The tears are free falling now.

“Can I hab ‘ug too?”

“No, sweetheart, I think this is a hug just for Sungie right now.”

“Awh…”

“Why don’t you go ask Jinnie-hyung for a hug?”

“Oks. Bye bye Sungie, bye bye Channie-hyungie.”

Seungmin leaves the room, skipping away. “I wanna be happy too,” Jisung mumbles into Chan’s side. The caregiver moves some hair from his face, wiping tears from his cheeks too. “I didn’ mean to hurt Lixie, I jus’ wan’ed the pen back, an’ he wouldn’ give it, and I hit him lightly, but it was too hard still…”

“Shhh, it’s ok. I understand, yeah?”

“Mmm…”

“You can say sorry when you’re ready to, bug.”

What if he’s never ready? What if he can’t say sorry ever again? What if Felix never wants to talk to him again because he’s scared of saying sorry?

“H-Hyungie?”

“Sungie?”

Jisung took a breath and sat up better, stealing Chan’s hand to hold. “How do I say sowwy?” He’s done it a lot, but he wants this to go well. He hates arguing with anybody, but Felix especially.

Felix is always happy and kind and Jisung shouldn’t have hit him.

“How do you think you should say sorry?” Chan wriggles his fingers, making Jisung smile a little. “You wanna practice?” He nods, because that sounds nice. He likes practicing it, making sure he does the right thing to make up for doing the wrong thing.

“I think I say… Uhhh.” Jisung thinks, wiping tears off his cheeks. He knows he needs to say sorry, then what he’s sorry for. So, after a minute of thinking, Jisung mumbles, “Sowwy for hitting?”

“Yeah, that’s perfect. Well done, kiddo.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. My smart boy, hm?”

He smiles, melting at the praise. It’s always nice to do things right, and it’s even better when he does the right thing after doing the wrong thing. It’s always like that.

The icky feeling is still there though. “Can I ge’ more hugs?” Chan nods, breaking his hand out of Jisung’s grasp and pulling him in. “Tank you…”

“Of course, Sungie. You deserve all the hugs, hm?”

“Mm…”

That didn’t feel true. He still hit. He hasn’t said sorry yet. He’s always causing problems. And it’s not fair on anybody else. Jisung feels bad every time he breaks a rule, every time he gets upset, every time he does the wrong thing without thinking about consequences.

At least the caregivers are nice.

“Channie-hyungie?” Seungmin’s voice came from the doorway. “I gabe Jinnie-hyung ‘ug!”

Chan pets Jisung’s hair. “Awh, good job. Why don’t you go ask Binnie-hyung for a star, puppy. I think you deserve one.”

With a squeal, Seungmin runs off, and Jisung and Chan are left on their own.

🐰🐷

“Binnie-hyung?”

“Yeah puppy?”

“Can I hab a star?”

Changbin shifted to look at Seungmin better, asking, “What did you do that deserves a star, Minnie?” He’d been cradling Felix in his lap for a while, the little falling asleep after a long crying session.

“I di’ goo’ lishens!” Seungmin padded over to sit next to them both, hugging himself into Changbin’s side and staring at the Felix-shaped koala. “Can I ge’ ‘ug too…” They can work on asking before doing, he’ll just relish in the cuteness of having two littles hugging him.

“Hmm, if you listened so well, then of course angel. We need to be quiet though, yes?” Seungmin nodded, sighing as he fidgeted with Changbin’s hoodie strings. “How did you do good listening, pup? You wanna tell me?”

He shook his head. “Ask Channie-hyung.” Sometimes Seungmin likes to say he deserves praise, but not say why, instead getting someone else to explain it. Sometimes Seungmin says to ask someone else, then launches into the story anyway. “‘M tired.” Currently, it looks like the first option.

“You can have a nap. Lixie’s napping.”

“On you.”

“Yeah, he’s napping on top of me. Do you wanna nap next to me, angel?”

“Noes, I go bed.”

Seungmin doesn’t move for a few seconds, engrossed in the way the hoodie strings tangle around his fingers. “Do you wanna be put to bed?” He shakes his head but stays sat there. “Minnie, what’s up?”

“Mm…”

“You wanna tell me?”

“I’s too loud.”

It’s pretty quiet. Soft snoring from Felix, a clock ticking, clattering in the kitchen. But that’s about it. “What’s loud, pup?” His head maybe, or the silence.

“Mmph. I go bed.” Without any further explanation, Seungmin stands up, waddling away to bed. Changbin didn’t question it, letting him do his own thing. Out of headspace, Seungmin doesn’t talk about how he feels. In headspace, he’s more open. So, if he needs help, Changbin trusts him to talk about it.

As soon as one bedroom door closed, the front door opend, Jeongin walking in with bags of food. “Hi hyung.” Changbin immediately shushes him, feeling Felix stir slightly. “Oh, sorry… Is he asleep?”

“Yeah, has been for a while.” Maybe 30 minutes, an hour, something. He should wake up soon, but Changbin wants him to get as much rest as possible. “Sungie’s in bed, Minnie’s just gone to bed, the baby is… somewhere.”

“That seems like the most important one to know the whereabouts of.”

“He’s fine. Sulky.”

“Minho-hyung is always sulky when he regresses.”

“True, which is why it’s not an issue.”

Jeongin rolls his eyes, walking through to the kitchen. Changbin hopes he bought food that is actually edible and easy to eat. And not ridiculously difficult to feed the littles if they need help.

Felix stirs again in Changbin’s lap, looking up at him with sleepy eyes. “Hi chicken. You feeling ok?” He shakes his head, hiding himself in the caregiver’s neck. “Awh, it’s ok, hm?”

He’s ran out of things to say at this point. “No’ oks…” Changbin strokes a hand through Felix’s hair. “Dream abou’ Sungie bein’ ma’ a’ me…” He was not asleep for that long. Surely.

“He’s not mad at you.”

“Bu’ wha’ if he is? Or if I made him sa’? I stole de pen, my faul’…”

Changbin sighed. “Lixie, look at me.” Felix lifts his head a little, wide eyes wet with tears staring up. “He’s not mad at you. Sungie’s upset, but he’s not mad at you. He’s not upset with you either. Ok?”

“Bu’ how do you know?”

“Because I do. Hm?”

A few tears start to fall down Felix’s face, Changbin swiping them away softly. “I know Sungie very well, like how I know you very well. I know he’s not mad at you, pixie, it’s alright.”

“Awh, are we still upset Lixie?” Chan popped out of nowhere, holding hands with Jisung. “Is it ok if Sungie talks to you now?” That question could be directed at anybody in the room.

“Look.” Changbin pointed a finger. “Sungie’s just there.” Felix looked in the direction, pouting. “You wanna talk now?” He nodded slowly, waiting for someone to do something.

The caregivers nodded to each other. Chan coached Jisung into the room, holding his hand and making sure he was ok. They sat on the couch, opposite end to Changbin and Felix, who shuffled around a bit to help the conversation flow.

“Sungie, what do we say?” Chan said, quiet, but loud enough for Changbin to hear. “Just like you practiced, kiddo, you’ve got this.”

“Sowwy… for hitting you.”

Changbin smiles. “Well done, bug. That’s a good job, hm?” He turns to Felix, who’s decided that cuddling into Changbin even more is safer. “You wanna say anything, chicken?”

“I’s ok.” He’s got the saddest little pout on his face, tears still visible on his cheeks, but he seems a little happier. The tiniest bit of joy in his eyes. “Sungie… Are ‘ou mad a’ me?”

“No. Are you mad a’ me?”

“Nuh… Sad dough…”

“Sowwy…”

“I’s ok. We play?”

Jisung’s face lit up. “Yeah! Wha’ you wanna play?” He scampered off the couch, leaving Chan’s arms. Felix followed suit, struggling his way out of Changbin’s hold and crawling down to the floor.

“Well, that’s them sorted.”

“Mhm. Piece of cake.”

“Yeah, right. Took me how long to convince Jisung to apologise?”

“Felix napped long enough that he dreamed… apparently… so a while.”

They laughed, watching the two littles play with whatever toys they could find. Cars, bears, picture books. The only thing they didn’t touch were the colouring books, which was fair. Considering that’s what started all the problems in the first place.

Laughter filled the dorm. They hid in the blankets and pretended they were digging underground. They watched TV and laughed everytime something remotely funny happened. They ran around like they were being chased by monsters.

“Woah, woah, slow down.” Hyunjin walked in, carrying some snacks. He stretched out an arm to the pair of caregivers lounging on the couch. “Do you want some?”

“Yeah. Obviously.”

“Obviously. Stupid question. Where’s Minnie?”

“In bed, taking a nap.”

“Minho…?”

Chan sat up. “Is he still in my room?” Changbin hadn’t seen him, so he shrugged. Concern appeared all of a sudden, hurting his heart. Surely Minho would’ve come out by now. “I’ll go check—”

“No, no, I’ll go.” Chan looked at him like he was crazy, or had pen all over his face. That has happened before. Changbin stood up, placing a firm hand on the oldest’s shoulder. “He’s being stubborn right? Maybe he’ll respond differently if it’s me?”

“Does he normally?”

Minho’s stubborn with everyone. “No.” Unless he slips naturally or involuntarily, it takes a while for Minho to be comfortable being little. Sometimes all four caregivers need to help with the encouragement, but Changbin thinks he can at least start getting somewhere. “I can try. I’ve been sat still for too long anyways.”

“Hm. Alright. He might ask for me, I told him to.”

“I’ll call for you, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Chan sat back on the couch. He still looked apprehensive but nodded in the direction of where they all assumed Minho would be, giving a final seal of approval. Hyunjin patted Changbin on the back, reaching to give Chan some food.

He made his way through the mess of toys and towards the bedroom. They really need to teach the littles how to tidy up. A voice stopped him from stepping on a teddy, calling down the hall.

“Binnie-hyungggg.” It was Seungmin, running over with socked feet, then realising he should slow down a little.

It’s always Seungmin.

Which, in reality, Changbin adores. Because big Seungmin doesn’t like physical contact as much as the others. But little Minnie is a tiny, adorable cuddle monster.

And, as a plus, Seungmin seemed happier than before. “Yeah pup? Trouble sleeping?” It looked like he’d had a nap, full of energy again.

“Noes, I wanna see Min…”

“Oh.” Of course he does. “Right. Well- I don’t know about that, he’s not in a good mood.”

Changbin didn’t know if Minho was in a good mood. Truthfully, Changbin never knows if Minho’s in a good mood. But he’s pretty confident that, currently, he’s grumpy. Or upset. Or something negative.

A hug probably wouldn’t help, unfortunately for the 5-ish year old standing in front of Changbin with a giant pout on his face.

“Can I jus’ see him?”

“Let me check on him first, ok?”

“Awwhhh, bu’ hyungie, I wanna see him…”

Not happening.

Do not fall for the puppy eyes.

Do not fall for the puppy eyes.

Seo Changbin, you are stronger than Kim Seungmin’s puppy eyes!

🐰

There was a knock at the door.

“Min, is it ok if I come in? It’s Changbinnie. Minnie’s out here too.”

He doesn’t respond, and isn’t surprised when the door creaks open either.

Minho hasn’t moved, still in the corner huddled up. He didn’t really think he could move, focusing way too much energy and attention on not doing the one thing he should do.

“Hi kitten. You ok?”

“Mm.”

“Hmm. Can I sit?”

Changbin sat down without waiting for Minho’s answer. Seungmin stood at the door, timid, watching with wide eyes. Minho stared at him for a second before redirecting his attention to the floor.

“You don’t wanna be small, hm?”

“No.”

“You’re not being a burden by being small, Min, it’s alright.”

“‘S not…”

He didn’t like feeling useless. He didn’t like feeling helpless and as if there’s nothing he can do himself. And even if being regressed takes those worries away, the guilt afterwards is all consuming.

“Why not?”

“Because it’s no’.”

“That isn’t a reason, baby, you know that.”

“‘M not a baby.”

Changbin sighed softly. “Minho… Stop dodging the question.” He wasn’t dodging it, he gave the answer already. “Why’s it not alright? Hm? Can you tell me?”

“No!”

“Min—”

“Mmmph!”

It didn’t need to be a reason. It was reason enough, it made sense in his head. And the thoughts were too long and big for him to say out loud. Minho doesn’t want to talk about it because it’s overwhelming, and the more overwhelmed he is, the smaller he feels.

“Please don’t yell at me.”

“Bu’ nobody’s listening!”

“You aren’t giving me answers, Min.”

Minho put his head down, bringing his legs up to his chin. He wrapped himself up like a burrito so he could hide completely. His muscles burned a little, lack of use, but his blanket was comforting.

Which made him want to cry, because his blanket shouldn’t be this comforting. And the idea of wanting to cry made him want to scream.

“I wan’ Channie-hyung…”

Changbin sighed. “Pup, can you get Channie-hyung for me?”

He didn’t see if Seungmin left or not. He assumed so, because Changbin didn’t say anything else. He didn’t poke him, he didn’t move, Minho didn’t hear anything. He just waited.

“What’s up? I heard yelling.”

“Yeah. He asked for you.”

Chan’s footsteps walked closer, then stopped. “Min, can you look up?” He shook his head, because if he does then he’ll cry. Or they’ll look too comforting and nice and he’ll want a hug and everything will fall apart. “We don’t yell. Ok?”

That’s not ok. Nothing’s ok. Nobody will listen to him. “Not ok,” he mumbled, unsure if they could hear him. If they would just understand what he’s saying… Minho doesn’t want to regress. He doesn’t want to be a kid, or a toddler, and especially not a baby. But always the worst option.

“You yelled at Jinnie earlier, hm?” Because he wasn’t listening either! Nobody understands it, the caregivers can’t and the other littles like being small. Mostly. At least more than Minho does. “Binnie doesn’t deserve to be yelled at either, ok? Can you say sorry please?” He shook his head.

Chan sits down next to Changbin, who asks softly, “Min, can you tell us why you won’t say sorry?” They know exactly what they’re doing, soft voices and easy to understand sentences. The nicknames.

“Nobody’s listenin’.” Minho peaks up. “I don’ wanna. An’ everyone’s saying I have to, but I don’t wan’ it. I don’t want to be small!” He slams his head back down with a sob. Nothing’s going to stop the regression at this point, he’s giving up on that.

He feels so tiny. So needy and helpless and like there’s nothing anybody can do to help. They’re saying it’s all ok, that he’s allowed to, that he can let go. Someone’s pulled him into a hug he doesn’t want but is taking it because he needs it.

“We know you don’t want to, but it’s ok to be little. Any time, Min, it’s always ok.”

“Yeah, let go, alright? You don’t need to hold on to being big right now. Let me and Binnie take care of you, hm?”

Minho feels all the worries slip away, one by one, fading as he falls deeper into his headspace. He doesn’t want to, still resisting enough to not fall into babyspace where he’s resided a lot recently, but he’s small. Tiny but not a baby. Mostly.

Peaking out of his shell, he looks up to them both smiling down at him. “Awh… Hi little one.” Chan’s holding him, Changbin swiping his finger over the little’s cheek. “So cute, hm?” Chan kisses his head, then whispering in his ear, “Well done, Min.”

He smiles, head flopping over to look at Chan. “We’ve got a small baby, hm? Do you need me keep your head up?” Minho tries, then fails, and Changbin reaches over to support his head.

Ok, maybe he is a baby…

“How old are we today, kitten?” Minho rummages a hand out of his blanket burrito and holds up one finger in front of Changbin. Then he switches it to two. And back to one. Somewhere around that. “Ok, thank you for telling me,” Changbin whispers with a smile before booping Minho’s nose.

He giggles, soft and sweet. It’s nice being small like this, being held and hugged and cared for. It’s just hard to let himself. And he’ll regret it later, but right now it’s not important. He can’t do big thoughts. He’s only a baby.

“You wanna go see the others?” Not happening. Chan’s too snuggly to be shared. “No?” Minho cuddles himself into Chan more, which seems to make him understand. “We can hug on the couch?”

“Mmmm…”

“Precious baby, hm?”

Changbin helps Chan lift Minho, the oldest standing up before receiving the little in his arms. “You want your paci, Min?” He nods into Chan’s shoulder, because he does. A lot.

Minho wants blankets and milk and paci and hugs and to lie on top of Chan because he’s comfy.

Changbin opens the door for them both, letting them through, then rushing past them to Minho’s room. Chan walks to the couch, placing him down and sitting next to him. He fusses a little, because he doesn’t want to be alone.

“I know, I know, I’m here.” Chan shushes the small whines and scoops Minho into his lap. “Binnie’s getting your paci, ok?” Good. He better be.

Minho’s not against biting.

They wait for a few minutes, a small crowd growing around them. Cooing over him, a hand swatting away too others.

“Paci acquired!” Minho looks over his shoulder, Chan’s hand still on his head. “Sungie, Lixie… What did we say about personal space?”

“Sowwy Binnie-hyung.”

“Sorry hyungie…”

Changbin passes the pacifier to Chan, ruffling Minho’s hair and smiling as he giggled. “It’s alright, kiddos. Why don’t you go play with Jinnie-hyung? Quietly, remember.”

Chan places the pacifier between Minho lips. The world immediately goes quiet, sinking deeper into happy fuzziness. “You can sleep, baby, it’s all ok.” He nods, falling further towards Chan’s body.

Minho’s vaguely aware of Changbin sitting next to him, petting his hair softly. He can almost hear the hushed talking from the floor, familiar clattering of plastic blocks.

“Sleepy baby, hm?”

“Shall I get blankets? And find Seungmin…”

“Yeah, I’m a bit trapped here hah.”

🐶

“Minnie, you in here?”

“Mhms.”

“Can I put a light on, angel?”

“Noes.”

Changbin enters the room slowly, probably watching Seungmin rake through his onesie collection. If he could see. It’s dark because the light was really annoying. Darkness is better sometimes, even if it’s scary.

“You want help?”

“I can’ find de one with de ears…”

That’s his favourite, even if he doesn’t do favourites. It’s got floppy dog ears and pockets, which are especially good for keeping plushies in them. He doesn’t want plushies though.

“Here.” Changbin hands him the exact thing he’s looking for. “It was hanging on your door, angel.”

“Ohs. ‘M siwwy.”

“Not silly, pup. Maybe a little for looking in the dark, but we’ve found it now, hm?”

“Yesh… Can Binnie-hyung help?”

“Of course, Minnie.”

He strips his clothes off, needing only some help getting the hoodie over his head, because that’s always hard. Then Changbin helps him into the onesie – two legs, then pulling it up over his head and wriggling the arms through. Seungmin manages to zip it up by himself and smiles, because that’s a big deal.

Changbin smiles too, which is difficult to see, but the light from the door not being completely shut makes it easier. “My smart angel, hm? All good?”

“Mhms.” Comfy and snuggly. “We go now.”

“Don’t you wanna nap, pup?” He shakes his head, ears hitting the sides of his head lightly. He giggles.

But Changbin gives him a look. “Minnie… What’s going on?” Seungmin stares at the floor, shifting his feet as the caregiver tries to meet his eyes. (Curse the height difference.) “I know there’s something. The lights are off and you said your head is loud. What’s up, hm?”

Seungmin takes a little breath. “I’s too quie’.” He doesn’t particularly enjoy it when it’s loud either, but there’s something about the silence that irks him. It’s annoying. Too loud even when it’s not. “An’ my ligh’ was doin’ the thing when it dancshes…”

“Flickering?” He nods. “I can fix that for you, pup.”

“Oks… We go?” Seungmin wants hugs. On the couch preferably, but at least outside of the dancing light room and with the others around him. Plus, he wants to see if Minho’s ok. “Pleeeaaase…?”

Changbin sighs, patting Seungmin’s back. “Alright.” They exit the room, hand in hand.

When they round the corner, Seungmin gasps softly, staring into the living area with wide eyes. “Is Min baby?” He rocks back and forth on his heels and does a little spin when Changbin nods. “Eeee!”

“Angel, I know you’re excited.” Seungmin nods, a lot, because he’s really excited. Ecstatic! “Yeah, it’s really exciting when Min’s small, isn’t it?” Changbin speaks so clearly and softly sometimes, which means he’s serious. “But let’s be quieter, ok?”

Minho never regresses. Never ever. Seungmin’s either not there or he doesn’t want to himself. Or Minho won’t let anybody into the room. Or Seungmin’s upset at something and doesn’t want to talk about it. Or some combination of that. They’re both a little stubborn about being little… maybe.

But that just makes this really exciting! A big deal. Because Seungmin’s regressed too, and he can be gentle. He’s good at being gentle. Unless Jisung plays too rough because then he’s a little rowdy too, but he’s better than Jisung at being gentle.

“Can I ‘ug Min?”

“Let’s wait and see, pup. Ok?”

“Awh, bu’ Binnie-hyung…”

Changbin, very annoyingly, knows to look away from Seungmin at this point. He’s used the puppy dog eyes too much in a short period of time, it’s pointless to try again. At least this soon… Maybe later.

Instead, he toddles his way to the kitchen.

Because Jeongin will give him a hug.

Maybe.

The kitchen smells like food. Vegetables… But also warm milk and popcorn. “Innie-hyungggg…” Jeongin spun around, knife hovering in his hands. “Cwuddles?”

“Yeah, one sec.” Seungmin spins in a circle while Jeongin finishes cutting some fruit. Eventually, after what feels like years, he walks over to the little. “Hug now?”

“Yesh.” He waddles into Jeongin’s arms, being cradled, rocked side to side. It’s a tight hug, just how he likes it, squishing him with affection. “Innie-hyung gibs nice cwuddles.”

After another amount of time that also feels like years, he remembers how tired he is, a wave crashing over him as he rests his head on the caregiver’s shoulder. “You want a nap, puppy?” He nods. A lot, because he really does. And he likes when Jeongin takes care of him.

It’s funny to watch him get confused when Seungmin calls him Innie-hyung.

They stand for a while, Jeongin petting Seungmin’s hair and letting him doze a little. Not completely, he’s still awake, hearing someone else walk into the kitchen. But he’s sleepy. Really sleepy, like he could fall asleep on Jeongin’s shoulder.

“Is he asleep?”

“No, just tired. We’re gonna go nap, yeah?”

Seungmin nods again, pulling away from Jeongin and rubbing his eyes. “Innie-hyung comes wit’ me?” Normally Chan or Changbin would put him down for a nap, so this is a big deal. The biggest deal.

“Yeah, of course Minnie.”

“My babies.”

“Ew.”

Ignoring Jeongin’s disgust, Seungmin toddles over to Hyunjin, who’s standing near the fridge. “Jinnie-hyung, I wan’ ‘ug…” He wordlessly opens his arms with a smile and the little plants himself in the perfect cuddle position. “Tank ’ou.”

“Awh, sweet angel.” Hyunjin squeezes Seungmin tightly with one hand, swiping hair away from his eyes with the other. “Cutie-pie, hm? So pouty and tired. Adorable.”

He wriggles a little, embarrassed at being called cute. Seungmin is not cute. Nuh uh. No way. “Mmm, no’ cute.” Hyunjin let’s him go, boops his nose and giggles. Seungmin pouts more, which makes Hyunjin coo again, even though he isn’t cute. Because pouting doesn’t make him cute. Absolutely not.

“Minnie, let’s go to bed before Jinnie-hyung tries to suffocate us with hugs.”

“Sup… Supfocate?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

Hyunjin frowns. Seungmin smiles. Jeongin laughs.

“Come on sleepy puppy, nap time.”

“Cwan we nap on de couch…”

“Well, there’s people on the couch… We can ask them to move?”

Seungmin shakes his head, taking Jeongin’s hand and pulling him through to where everyone else is. Once there, he lets go, announcing, “I wan’ cwuddle pile!”

Everyone looks up. Changbin and Chan are on the couch, Minho snuggling into the oldest’s shoulder with legs across his lap. Felix and Jisung are on the floor, playing with blocks and tiny dolls.

“Shhh, let’s be quieter Minnie.” Jeongin whispers from behind him.

“Sowwy,” Seungmin says to the room, normal volume. Then he plants himself next to Felix and Jisung on the floor, Jeongin joining them a few seconds later. “Why we gotta be quie’?” He cuddles into the caregiver’s side, having his hair petted lazily.

“Baby’s ‘eeping.”

“Min?”

“Yuh, he’s ‘eeping. We hab ‘o be quie’.”

“I wanna slweep too…”

Seungmin turns his head to look at the couch, watching the slow rise and fall of Minho’s chest. He looks comfy, fast asleep in Chan’s arms. Changbin’s looking down at him, smiling softly.

“Binnie-hyung…”

“Yes?”

“Can I hab ‘ug…”

“Yeah, come here, angel.”

He turns around to wave to the other three on the floor before shuffling over to join the three on the couch. Changbin lets him pick where he wants to sit, moving over to be further from Minho and Chan so Seungmin could sit in the middle.

“Remember not to disturb him, hm?” He nodded, knowing that’s very important. Seungmin doesn’t like being disturbed during a nap, Minho probably doesn’t either. “Well done for asking for hugs before taking them, pup.”

“Tank ‘ou. I trwied.” He did. Very hard. Definitely wasn’t too tired to move before asking.

Ok, maybe he just forgot that he could take them without asking.

In all fairness! If Seungmin asked first, then was told no, he would’ve been able to cuddle on the floor instead without having to move. But, if Seungmin didn’t ask first and moved towards the couch and was then rejected, he’d have moved for no reason. So, therefore, it was an entirely intentional choice.

Definitely.

Changbin kisses his forehead lightly, pulling him into a proper hug. Seungmin watches Jisung and Felix play quietly on the floor, Jeongin asking them questions.

It looks interesting, they normally have a whole storyline planned out. Seungmin doesn’t normally like to play, but he does like to watch. “Binnie-hyung?” Changbin hums. “Do you know wha’ Sungie an’ Lixie are pwaying?”

“Hmm… Well, they have dolls and bricks out. What do you think?”

“Dunnos… ‘M too tirwed to hab opinyon…”

He started to doze off again. “Sleepy puppy, hm?” Changbin’s comfy. Everyone’s comfy, but Changbin gives the best hugs out of the caregivers. Especially sleepy cuddles.

The last thing Seungmin sees before he falls asleep is Hyunjin smiling at him from the doorway.

🥟

Walking back into the kitchen, Hyunjin picks up Felix’s sippy cup and Jisung’s big boy cup, placing them onto the tray of snacks.

There were options, Jeongin’s shopping being surprisingly healthy and age appropriate for 4 littles. Chan probably expected him to buy multiple bags of chocolate bars or – shock horror – energy drinks. But he bought fruit, veg, some snacky treats and drinks that kids are allowed to drink.

It was surprising, but Hyunjin had faith.

Kind of.

He walks through to the living area, placing the snacks on the table next to the couch. Changbin looks at them longingly, unable to move so he doesn’t disturb the sleeping Seungmin attached to his side. Hyunjin picks up a stick of melon and Changbin opens his mouth to be fed.

“You cannot be serious.”

“I’m very serious. I’ve got a baby attached to me.”

“He will hate you if he knew you said that.”

“He’s my baby, alright? Now feed me.”

Hyunjin takes a second to glance at Chan, who gives a tiny shrug as to not disrupt Minho – the actual baby in the household – before chuckling softly at the face of utter disapproval Hyunjin makes in response. Not helpful. At all, really, but he didn’t exactly know what he wanted to oldest to do in this situation.

Seungmin’s a deep sleeper when he’s little, Minho wakes up at anything.

“He’ll sleep through it if you reach out and grab the melon, hyung, it’s not a big deal.” Hyunjin dropped a box of plastic toys right next to Seungmin once. While he was asleep, after an emotional day, and he didn’t flinch at all. Continuing his slumber with no problems whatsoever.

Hyunjin needed 10 minutes to recover and Seungmin just slept through it without a care.

Changbin could move a few inches. And he knew it. “Ugh, fine.” A slow hand rises to take the piece of melon from Hyunjin. “Thank you.”

“Hm, you’re welcome.”

Padding over to the others on the floor, Hyunjin takes the empty space between Felix and Jeongin, softly asking, “You finished setting up now?” It looked complicated, which he should have come to expect by now. Felix and Jisung always had the most complicated storylines.

“Dis is Jim…” Felix holds up a doll. It has blond hair that’s been cut off – probably by Jisung – and is wearing casual clothes. “He’s ‘eepin’.”

“Oh, ok. Is it night?”

“Noes, he… works at nigh’ so he ‘eeps in de day.”

“Alright, that makes sense.”

Jisung holds up a different doll. It has long brown hair, a bag and is wearing what Hyunjin assumes is a wedding dress. “This is…” He pauses and looks at Felix. “How d’you say i’ again?”

“Be-a-trwice.”

“Be… Beatrice?”

“Yeh.”

“Oks, Jinnie-hyung, this is Beatrice.”

Ignoring how Felix obviously chose the names, that’s definitely a wedding dress. “Is Beatrice sleeping too?” Felix and Jisung both shake their heads.

“She’s crying,” Jeongin provides, holding another doll. “This is Jim’s brother, Tim.” This doll has a suit on, hair messily cut off – again, probably by Jisung – and has glasses drawn onto his face. “He broke Beatrice’s heart on their wedding day.”

The wedding dress makes more sense now.

“Ah, ok. Uhh. What- Why did he do that?”

“We haven’t gotten there yet. They won’t tell me anything.”

“Awh, kids, are we keeping secrets?”

Jisung opens his mouth, closes it again and takes a deep breath, trying to be quiet so he doesn’t wake the sleeping littles on the couch. “Not secrets, jus’ not gotten there yet.” Felix nods, putting Jim-the-doll back on his bed. “You gotta watch Jinnie-hyung, then you can learn.”

“Did you teach him that, Innie?”

“Nope. You?”

“No. Probably Channie-hyung, right?”

“Yeah, definitely Channie-hyung.”

Felix points to a small plastic dog, then picks it up and waves it in Hyunjin’s face. “Dis is Jim’s dog.” It’s white, a fluffy tail attached to the otherwise hard toy. “He’s libin’ wit’ Betrwice because… Jim said dat… she nee’s… Sungie wha’s de word?”

“Proteshion.” Jisung smiles. “An’ dats because Tim is a bad man…” His face drops, entirely serious. Complex storylines. Hyunjin nods slowly, ignoring how Jeongin is giggling at his surprise.

He turns to the younger caregiver, whispering so the littles won’t hear, “What’s Tim done to be bad man?” Jeongin shrugs. “How much do you know?”

“Nothing, heh, they aren’t telling me—”

“Stop whispering!” Jisung says, at normal volume. Which sounds pretty loud in comparison to the soft voices they were meant to be using. The caregivers sat on the floor glance over to the group on the couch, noticing Minho stir slightly.

Hyunjin turns back to Jisung, speaking as softly as he can, “Sungie, we have to be quiet… Remember?” He shakes his head. “Min and Minnie are asleep, ok? We need to—”

“Why do we have to be quie’ when they could jus’ go to bed?”

“Jisungie, we don’t interrupt,” Jeongin says, speaking softly too, even though it seems pointless. Jisung’s not calming down, pouting with furrowed brows. “They’re already asleep, kiddo, but we can move if you want?”

Jisung stands up and walks away, finding a spot in the corner. He crosses his arms with a bigger pout than before crossing his face, sniffing a little. Felix watches but otherwise seems completely unaffected to everything happening around him, happily building something with the blocks. A little out of character, Hyunjin makes a note to check on him later.

A couple silent minutes pass, and Jeongin lightly pokes Hyunjin’s arm. “Should we…?” Jisung doesn’t look like he wants to rejoin them, glaring instead.

“I’ll go, you… play whatever you’re playing.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, you haven’t had time with them today.”

“Hm, ok.”

Hyunjin ruffles Felix’s hair, earning a smile, and moves onto his feet. He wanders over to Jisung, sitting quietly in front of him. He waits for the little to say something, but his lips are tightly shut.

“You wanna tell me your thoughts?”

“Not fair.”

“Hmm, why’s it not fair?”

“I wanna be loud, bu’ I’m not meant to because they’re all too small.”

Ah. Not a small issue. These are big feelings. Hyunjin’s not great at those, but the two best options are cradling sleeping littles, and the third best is the person he just told to relax. By playing dolls with a 4-year-old.

“Why don’t we go to the kitchen, and we can play together, hm?”

“No.”

“Do you have a different idea?”

Jisung shrugs. So, second option, the silent treatment. But the nicer kind, the one where they sit together and think separately. Not in a mean way, nothing negative, just silent regulation time.

They do this a lot, with all the littles. Jisung especially, because he’s older, and he more in tune with his emotions than the other three. Seungmin sometimes, but he likes a hug when he’s upset. Felix simply cries his eyes out until he’s exhausted, so there’s never a lot of silence. And most of the time Minho’s little, he doesn’t speak anyways.

It takes Hyunjin a second to notice as he’s lost in thought, but after a while there’s definitely a clear shift in Jisung’s posture. His eyes clearer, his back straightened, his pout lessening. “Jisungie?” He doesn’t look up, biting at his lip as redness spreads over his skin. “Hey, you with me?”

“Sorry.”

Yeah. Not little.

“What are you sorry for?”

Hyunjin feels like he should tread carefully, even if Jisung knows he doesn’t need to answer anything. He doesn’t want to overwhelm him, push him back into his headspace if he doesn’t need to be in it anymore. Jisung doesn’t pull himself out of it regularly, but he’s had an exceptionally bad day. Thinking time tends to have an effect too.

“I don’t… I-I don’t even know.” He rubs a hand over his face. “Feel stupid. I-I… keep getting myself into trouble.”

Yes, he does, but they all signed up to that the minute they agreed to be caregivers. “Hannie, you aren’t in trouble.” He removed himself from the situation when he was upset, which is better than earlier. “Nobody’s mad at you, you don’t need to force yourself out of littlespace to apologise.”

Jisung picks at his nails and bounces his leg, thinking over a reply. Instead of literally anything else that Hyunjin would’ve expected, he laughs. “When did you get good at this?”

“No idea. Didn’t think I was that good honestly.” He’s good at playtime, he’s good at helping with tasks and talking to them. But the emotional stuff just stresses Hyunjin out. “You wanna stay little?”

“Not really.”

“I could sit next to you if that would help?”

“No, I… Thank you, I-I just wanna go to bed for a bit.”

Hyunjin nods, offering Jisung a hand and helping him to his feet. “If you need anything or you regress, you find someone. Yeah?” That’s the rule. If a little regresses, they need to find a caregiver.

“Yeah. Don’t worry, Jinnie, I’m good.” Yeah, right. Hyunjin lets him go anyways, trusting Jisung to talk if he’s overwhelmed. Or, at least, that he’ll talk when he needs to.

When he returns to the group, Chan waves him over. Minho’s awake, staring at him with teary eyes. “You wanna say sorry, kitten?” The little whines into Chan’s chest. Hyunjin watches in confusion. “Awh, Min, come on. Let’s say sorry for yelling, hm?”

“Oh,” Hyunjin exclaims softly, aloud, not realising it. “He doesn’t need to say sorry, it’s alright.” Minho was stubborn, they all knew he was stubborn, they all got yelled at sometimes when he refused to slip. Part of the job.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, no, I- I’m good.”

“There goes my lesson of the day then…”

Hyunjin breathes out a laugh, resting on the arm of the couch. Minho looks up at him, and he can tell he’s sorry. He’s always sorry. Then Minho reaches out, grabbing at the air, whining at Hyunjin.

“You want Jinnie-hyung, baby?”

“Mmmmm.”

“Do you want a hug from him?”

Lots of nodding, with a pout, causing a grin to surface on Hyunjin’s face. Chan shuffles over without saying anything, letting Hyunjin take his space on the couch and hold Minho in his lap. “Shh, I’ve got you.” He bounces the baby in his arms, letting him relax into the hug.

“Where’d Sungie go?”

Panic. Over Jisung. Again. “Uh, he- Well, he got upset that he couldn’t be loud and sulked for a bit. And now he’s big again, in his room, probably sulking some more.” Chan frowns, looking at Felix on the floor playing happily with Jeongin. “He said he was fine, but I think he’s embarrassed because he’s having a rough day.”

“Why?” Chan moves, petting Minho’s hair before he stands up. It’s at this point that Hyunjin looks over, seeing how Changbin’s fallen asleep with a lazy arm around Seungmin’s shoulders. “Like, why do you think that?”

“He said he keeps getting himself in trouble and that he was sorry…”

“Hmm. Ok. I’ll go check on him again.”

“Hyung, give him a few minutes, he might just need some time alone.”

They had kinda been breathing down all of their necks today. Which, from experience, is always better. Things can turn dangerous pretty quick, and emotional, and sometimes violent. Like Jisung hitting Felix over a pen. But it might be a little much. Hyunjin would find it a bit much.

“What’s going on?” Jeongin asks from the floor.

🦊

After an hour, it’s agreed they should check on Jisung.

“Remember Sungie might be big.” Felix nodded, smiling up at him with wide glassy eyes. “Good. If you want to go, you tell me first, ok?” Another nod. He’s being quiet, probably getting sleepier as the day extends into night.

Jeongin opens the door, peaking in. Jisung’s sat on his bed, phone in his hand, scrolling aimlessly through something. Social media maybe, Jeongin doesn’t really care considering the position the other is in says something is wrong.

Curled up, darkened room, blanket over his shoulders, blank expression on his face.

The problem immediately arises in his brain that if he calls Jisung ‘hyung’, he might make things worse. If he doesn’t, he might also make things worse. “Um. Can we come in?” A small nod, permission, so Jeongin takes Felix’s hand and leads him into the bedroom.

“Can I sit here?”

“Yeah.”

He sounds dazed, but not little. Maybe somewhere in between. Jeongin sits next to him, lifting Felix into his lap. After a few seconds of silence, he whispers, “Are you ok?” Jisung doesn’t answer at first, movements stalling before he puts his phone down and sighs.

“Honestly?”

“Always.”

Jeongin watches Jisung gulp and open his mouth to speak. Felix plays with Jeongin’s hand, picking his fingers apart and squishing them back together. Soft giggles fill the awkward silence.

“I feel really dumb.”

“Yeah?”

“Like… I keep being an idiot, and I-I know it’s fine with you guys, but… I just feel dumb.”

“Because you’re upset?”

Jisung shakes his head. “No, it’s… I-I feel like- Because, like, because I’m the oldest that I should set an example but everyone else is so much better behaved? And I can’t stop reacting badly, and I know it’s… I know I’m not… I mean, I know I’m a kid still but i-it jus’ feels bad.” He sniffs, voice breaking a little at the end.

“Ok. That’s fair.”

“It’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid, it’s fair. You’re allowed to feel like that.”

He’s definitely somewhere in between big and little, his emotions probably dragging him into headspace but stubbornness keeping him out of it. If Jeongin says the wrong – or right, depending on how you look at it – thing, he’ll send Jisung spiralling into being small again. And he doesn’t seem to want that, so Jeongin will be careful. No nicknames, no touching, no anything. Respecting him and his space.

“Sungie sad?” Felix turns to look at them both, shuffling in Jeongin’s lap and dropping his hand. Jisung doesn’t say anything. “Why sa’?”

Jisung looks at Jeongin as if he doesn’t know what to say, how to explain it. Or maybe he doesn’t want to talk to Felix about it, not wanting him worrying over something that’s a big problem. Or maybe it’s something else. “Lixie, let’s be quiet, hm?” Felix frowns but picks Jeongin’s hand up again, still looking at Jisung.

“You aren’t burdening anybody. You know that, right?”

“Hmm.”

“We love taking care of you, it doesn’t stop when you’re upset.”

Felix turns around again, wriggling to get out of Jeongin’s lap. He let’s the little go, watching him closely as he enters a very visible decision making process. Thinking deeply, looking between the pair on the bed, waiting for something to click in his head. “What’s up, chicken?”

“Dinking…” He sits on the floor, sticking his tongue out the side of his mouth with pinched brows.

After spending time admiring how cute Felix looks when he’s pondering something in his head, Jeongin feels Jisung’s head rest on his shoulder. He doesn’t move, not wanting to disturb the peace. And he seemed ok, breathing steadily, picking at his nails.

“Innie-hyungie?”

“Yeah, pixie?”

“Ca’ Lixie gib Sungie a ‘ug?”

“Lixie has to ask Sungie that, not hyung.”

(He always feels weird about that – the hyung thing – because he’s grown completely used to being the youngest. But Jeongin also thinks it’s nice, how all the littles call him Innie-hyung, how they all treat him like a responsible adult instead of their younger brother.)

“Sungieeee?”

“Hmm?”

“Ca’ I gib Sungie ‘ug?”

“Yeah, ok. Come up here, chicken.”

Felix practically leaps to his feet, Jeongin smiling as Jisung opens his arms for the little to cuddle into his side, head still on the caregiver’s shoulder. “Comfy?” Felix must nod because Jisung mumbles, “Good. That’s good.”

The room is still, gentle inhales and softer exhales filling the silence. Three in a line – one little, one somewhere in between and one caregiver. There’s only a nightlight on, casting thin blue shadows over the otherwise dark room.

Jisung stopped fidgeting after a while, settling more into Jeongin’s side. Felix peaks up, looking at the caregiver with curiosity, but he doesn’t say anything. He glances towards the door, then back at Jeongin, who nods with a smile.

Felix slips out of Jisung’s hold, padding his way to the door. A tiny wave and he’s gone, leaving Jeongin with… whatever age Jisung’s at. That’s always the first step anyways, checking how old they feel.

“You awake?”

“Mhm… Why?”

His words are a little slurred, but his voice isn’t higher than normal. Normal being big Jisung, not small Sungie. He might just be tired. Jeongin bites his bottom lip, then whispering. “You feeling small?” He feels the pause, the moment of thought, stillness for a few seconds before Jisung remembers to breathe.

“Mm… A bit… Still feel dumb though.”

“Hmmm… Would being small help?”

It should. In theory. Because it would let him process it a little better.

Jisung sighs, shifting away from the touch he originally initiated. “I-I don’t think so.” Jeongin shuffles around too, now sitting cross legged on the bed, watching Jisung put effort into talking. “Think tha’s where the problems are from.”

“Listen, um.” Jeongin pauses, watching Jisung’s eyes. They’re wide, a little glassy. “You aren’t annoying us, and you aren’t burdening us. Any of us. We love little Sungie, yeah? Even if he’s struggling with the rules or upset about something.”

He drops eye contact, Jeongin watching the tiny shrug he gives. “Still feel dumb,” Jisung mutters, and before Jeongin can interrupt, he continues, “but… thank you.”

“Of course. Anytime, yeah?”

“Mhm… Anytime…”

Jeongin waits a few seconds, letting Jisung decide if he wants to say anything else. He doesn’t, still and silent, concentrating. “You wanna be small?” A tiny nod, unsure. “You want me to help?”

“Yeah… If… I-If that’s ok.”

“It’s ok. It’s always ok, bug.”

Standing up from the bed, Jeongin reaches a hand out to Jisung. “Come on, kiddo, I’ll make you a snack.” A smile creeps across his face, taking the offer a few seconds later.

They walk through to the kitchen, taking Felix with them. He was sat bored on the floor, everyone else passed out on the couch. Except Chan, who was tidying up. He’s lasted long enough in the chaos, they can give him a pass.

“Sungie, what snack do you want?” Jisung, still half-and-half, wanders to the freezer. “Dino nuggies?” A little nod. Shy, maybe. Felix is sat on the floor, staring up at the world. Jeongin crouches down, asking softly, “You want anything Lixie?”

“Nuh. I a’e lo’s of veggies.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeh!”

Jeongin smiles, padding back to Jisung and collecting the box of food. “How many do you want?” He opens the box, letting the kind-of-little see them.

“Dunno.”

“Can you count for me, bug?”

“Mmmmaybe.”

Playing hard to get. “Come on, kiddo, you’re old enough to count.” He normally is, and the smile on Jisung’s face at Jeongin knowing that means everything to him. “Let’s try this, I’ll put the nuggies in the bowl, you count along with me. Yeah?”

“Oks…”

“Can you get me a bowl?”

“Mhm.”

Jisung pulled a bowl out of a drawer, placing it on the counter. “Good job, bug.” Jeongin picked up one nugget and dropped it into the bowl. “You gonna count?”

“One…” Another nugget. “Two.” And another. “Three.” And then, just to make sure he’s paying attention, multiple nuggets. “Uhh… Five?”

“I think so. Do you think so?”

“Yeah…”

“That’s not convincing, Sungie.”

“Well, I think it is, bu’ you wen’ fast.”

Success. “Awh, I’m sorry, kiddo. Do you want more nuggets in the bowl?” Jisung nods, eyes trained on Jeongin’s hand. He drops a few more in, Jisung continues to count. Perfectly, may he add.

“Well done, yeah?”

“Mhms. Well dones.”

Jeongin picks the bowl of dino nuggets up, letting Jisung see. “I’ll cook these, ok?” He nods, looking proud of himself. “You wanna go through or do you wanna stay with me?”

“Stay wit’ you.”

“Alright, Sungie.”

Jeongin turns to where he expects to find Felix but instead sees a pair of socked feet running out of the room.

🐥

Toddling into the living area, Felix spots Chan walking towards his room. He follows, stopping in the doorway.

“Channie-hyung?”

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

“Cwuddles?”

He smiles, putting a box of toys down on the bed. “C’mere.” Chan opens his arms, making it easy for Felix to waddle into them.

Chan’s hugs are good. Felix thinks he’s a magician sometimes – actually, that all of the caregivers are magicians – because he can make the hug perfect for different times.

Like, when Felix wants a tight hug, Chan just knows. Or when Felix wants to cuddle on the couch or in bed, Chan also knows. And right now, Felix wants a gentle hug with back rubs, Chan knows that too.

“You ok, Lixie?” Eek question. He nods, even if it’s not true, because he’s a little upset. And Chan is magical, so he knows it’s a lie, and pulls back from the hug to look at Felix’s face. “Hmm, are you sure? I see a pout.”

“Sungie’s sad…”

“Ah, is he?”

“Yeh, Lixie gibs ‘ug bu’ Sungie wa’ still sa’ an’ I didn’ know wha’to do…”

“Awh, chicken.”

Felix likes helping. He likes it a lot, especially when he gets praised for it. And also when it helps, and he can see the person smiling again. He’ll give hugs or play or do anything to make anybody in the household smile again.

He doesn’t like conflict either, he doesn’t like it when Jisung’s shouty, when Seungmin’s crying or when Minho’s locked himself in his room. And it makes him feel really bad when one of the caregivers gets upset.

He wants to help them all be happy. Not sad. Not angry. Not embarrassed. Just happy.

“You were really nice giving Sungie hugs, hm?” Chan picks him up, walking to the bed and sitting down. Felix nuzzles himself into the caregivers side, frowning. “Sometimes Sungie gets upset and there’s not a lot we can do. But I’m really happy he got some hugs from you, Lixie.”

“Mm… Bu’ why Sungie sa’?” There could be a lot of reasons, or just one, or two, or none. Felix feels sad for no reason sometimes, and Jisung’s the same. “An’ he hi’ me today… So, he musht be more sad?”

Chan hugged him closer, kissing his forehead gently. “You’re so sweet, you know that?” Yes, he does, he’s told that every time he’s upset because someone else is. “But I don’t know why Sungie’s upset today.”

“Bu’ why no’?”

“I don’t know everything, pixie.”

“Hmph. Bu’ you meant ‘o?”

For some reason, Chan finds that question funny. It’s a serious question though, so Felix stares at him until he stops giggling, waiting for his answer. “Lixie, I’m not a genius, yeah? I know a lot, yes, but I don’t think there’s anybody on Earth that knows everything.”

He’s lying to protect his identity.

“Awh, bu’ hyungie… How we help Sungie feel bettuh?”

“You know when you’re sad, you just need some time, right?”

“Yeh…”

“Maybe that’s all Sungie needs, chicken, just a little bit of time.”

But he wants to fix it now. “Ca’ we do cwuddlwe pile?” That helps sometimes. And Seungmin wanted one earlier! So, maybe Felix can make Seungmin happy too. As long as everyone else is happy with it. Minho might be a problem though.

“Alright, we can ask. Yeah? Just asking. No promises.”

“Mmmok.”

Chan helps Felix up, the little running off immediately before remembering he shouldn’t run inside. Accidents have happened, they will probably happen again. It’s fun to slide though, even if he’s fallen and hurt himself doing that, Felix still thinks it’s fun.

The couch is busy. Seungmin’s playing idly with Changbin’s hoodie strings, twisting them around. Minho’s still asleep, probably, curled up in Hyunjin’s arms. Jeongin has Jisung in his lap, making sure he doesn’t spill any food.

“Hi,” he announces his presence quietly, tiptoeing over to look at Minho closely. “Jinnie-hyung?” Hyunjin nods, waiting. “Is Min ‘eeping?”

“A little, yeah. Why? What’s up?”

“Wan’ cwuddle pile…”

Hyunjin hums softly, making Minho open his eyes. “Why don’t you start with them?” He points to the rest of the couch, Felix following his finger. “Then we can see, hm?”

“Oks.” Wobbling his way over to Seungmin next, because he wanted the cuddle pile in the first place, Felix taps on his shoulder. “Minnie?”

“Mmmyeh?”

“You wan’ cwuddle pile?”

“Hmm. Yesh.”

“Okie!”

Successful. Now it’s Jisung’s turn. “Sungie?” He nods, with a mouthful of nuggies. “You wan’ cwuddle pile too?” Another nod! Full house of littles, minus the baby, wanting the cuddle pile. That’s good, because it makes it more likely.

(Not that it wouldn’t be likely. The caregivers would do anything for their littles.)

Chan reappears, tapping Felix on the shoulder. “Did you get agreement?” He nods, a lot, almost jumping up and down with excitement. “That’s great, pixie, why don’t you grab some pillows for us then?”

Now he’s jumping.

Felix skips off to his room, immediately finding his box of fluffy pillows and blankies and carrying it through to the living area. Chan’s wrestled Changbin up to help with bringing the couch cushions onto the floor. A proper cuddle pile.

It’s not been ages since they’ve done this, but it’s been a while, so it’s really exciting. Felix runs off to the next room, looking for Jisung’s blankets next. He finds the box, rakes through it to make sure he has everything he needs, then chases back to the growing pile of comfort on the floor.

Seungmin meets him there, giggling with a grin on his face that makes Felix feel like he’s flying. The other little has Minho’s blankets, as well as his own. They have less, because they’re stubborn.

Felix doesn’t think they’re that stubborn. It’s just that sometimes, they don’t like being small as much as him and Jisung do. Minho his pacis and Seungmin has a onesie collection.

“I can take those, pixie,” Changbin says, reaching out to grab the box from Felix’s hands. He puts it down on the floor, and they all watch as the base of their pile is made.

One blanket goes down first, then the couch cushions and some extra pillows to fill in any blanks. Then another blanket, and all the fluffy pillows on top! There’s lots of stuff left over to choose from, so Felix picks out a soft yellow blankie and a fluffy blue pillow before flopping into the middle of his creation.

Seungmin joins him next, sitting cross legged with a green pillow in his lap and a few plushies around his feet. Then Jisung comes in, having finished his nuggies, and lies next to Felix with a light pink blanket around his head.

Looking up, they watch Jeongin walking to the kitchen with Jisung’s bowl, and Changbin fiddling with the TV to find something for them all to watch. He settles on an old kids cartoon before joining the group, letting Seungmin move to sit in his lap a little more.

Felix pokes Jisung’s arm. “Yeah?” He’s got the widest smile on his face, eyes bright and a few crumbs left on his face from his food.

“Is Sungie ‘appy?”

“Yeah, I’m happy Lixie. Are you happy?”

“Very.”

They both smile at each other, only interrupted by Jeongin joining them on Jisung’s side. Felix feels at peace. Trapped in the middle of his favourite people.

The only problem is Minho. As expected! But it’s still annoying.

He’s cuddled into Hyunjin’s side, staring down at everyone. Chan’s whispering something in his ear, but Felix can’t hear because of the TV. He sits up, watching Minho’s face. He looks upset.

“Channie-hyung?” The caregiver pauses, telling Felix to wait a second with one finger before resuming whatever he’s saying. Then he walks over and crouches down. Before he can say anything, Felix asks, “Is Min sad?”

Chan sighs, brushing hair out of the little’s face. It tickles, so he giggles. “He’s a little upset, yeah.” Then Felix frowns, because that’s not fair. Minho should be happy too.

“Why?”

“Sometimes…” Chan pauses again, choosing words. Felix knows that because he does the same face when someone tells Jisung to choose his words. Felix doesn’t really know what ‘choosing words’ means, but it doesn’t matter because Chan’s talking again. “Sometimes Min’s upset and we don’t really know why, chicken.”

“Ca’ Min come sit?” Maybe that would make it better. “I ca’ be goo’ an’ gen… gentle.”

His hair’s fallen in his eyes again, Chan moving it aside. It tickles again. “I’ll ask, hm? Sound good?” Felix nods, watching him smile and then walk back to Hyunjin and Minho.

Seungmin pokes him. “I wan’ ‘ug Min too, bu’ he was slweepin’ so I coul’n’.” Felix nods, not knowing what to say. He’s sleepy.

Minho’s head is buried into Hyunjin’s neck, but they do walk forward, Chan signalling for Felix to move a little so they can sit down. He watches Jeongin play with Jisung’s hair instead of watching the other three moving, not wanting to give an extra pair of eyes.

When he turns around though, Minho’s in Chan’s lap, face hidden in the caregiver’s chest. Next to them, Hyunjin’s opening his arms for Felix to climb into. He does, because hugs, keeping his blanket wrapped around him tightly.

“Is Min ok?”

“Hm, he will be, Lixie. Don’t worry, yeah?”

“I’s hard ‘o no’…”

Hyunjin leans down, giving him a small kiss on his head. “I know, chicken. But you’ve done really well today. Hm?” He nods, starting to feel sleepier. “Such a good boy, yeah? Really good.”

As Felix starts to doze off in Hyunjin’s arms, Minho turns to face him more.

He gives a small smile, obscured by his pacifier.

And Felix smiles back, happy as he drifts off the sleep. Surrounded by his friends – no, his family – with blankets and plushies, cartoon playing gently in the background.

The problems melt away like this, fuzzy and content.