Chapter Text
It starts with a simple question.
“When’s the 10yearz friendship rings happening?” Jake inquires.
Right. The rings. Those rings. The rings that Jay and Heeseung have been dancing around for years.
“I forgot about it,” Jay lies through his teeth. How could he forget about something that weighs heavily on his mind every day? He tries to change the subject. “But we should probably change the name first.”
The conversation flows from there and new topics are discussed. But, against his will, all Jay can think about is that damn ring. The ring that doesn’t even exist. The ring that he dreams about and wishes he could wear.
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
After the event, and an agonizing car ride home (yes, he got sat next to Heeseung), the group splits off to their respective dorms. Jay’s head is still a little dazed from the mention of the rings. He drops his bag at the foot of his bed and facepalms onto his pillow. He groans and kicks his legs in a way that can only be compared to a tiny child’s tantrum.
“You good?” A questioning voice that sounds suspiciously like Sunghoon echoes into his room.
Jay looks up and can only nod, though his pout is evident. He swiftly throws his head back onto his bed and muffles out a command to shut his door. He needs to wallow in peace and away from prying eyes. He doesn’t need the entire group to know he’s lovesick over his own bandmate.
After what feels like hours of moping, he sits up and opens his camera to assess the damage. His eyes are puffy and his nose is a nice shade of red. He hadn’t even realized he’d cried. He had already felt low, but now he was truly at rock bottom.
Maybe it’s time for him to finally get over his one and only hyung. A person he values so much. The one he’s known for ten years now. Oh, who is he kidding? All he wants right now is to crawl into Heeseung’s bed and be spooned by him. And there goes the tears again. He’s hopeless.
It’s definitely time for bed. He can’t take any more of the Heeseung worms currently eating his brain. Sleep will do the trick!
He changes into a nice pajama set and gets his eye mask ready. He needs deep sleep so he even turns on some white noise to play. He tucks himself in and closes his eyes.
One sheep… two sheep… three sheep… Heeseung… um? Jay twists to the other side. Okay, one sheep… two sheep… matching rings… Yeah, this isn’t working. He sits up and takes his eye mask off and reaches for his phone. Some doomscrolling on Twitter wouldn’t hurt.
He logs into his secret account and gets to scrolling. He likes and saves various F1 related tweets and some posts about his favorite music artists. He even decides to check up on what engenes are talking about. He sees the usual. However, he comes to a stop when he sees the clip from earlier when Jake had brought up the rings. Wow. He was not as nonchalant about the subject as he thought he was. He (regrettably) checks the comments.
cece @jayslefteye: jay stand up omfg
Amara : Vanished @notcuteanymore: Ten years and still no ring what!!!!!!
layla ♡ @jakepuppy: dont careeeee jayke better
heejay president @heeseungjayfilm: they’ve been teasing the rings forever but i’m losing hope. the divorce allegations are true. let’s all die.
Yep, maybe it is that damn phone. Jay shuts it off and tries his hardest to sleep away the thoughts. Eventually, he drifts off, but his dreams are plagued by a certain blond with the prettiest bambi eyes he’s ever seen.
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
Jay wakes up with swollen eyes and a pounding headache. He tossed and turned all night thanks to thou who shall not be named.
He drags himself through his morning routine. He’s not feeling great, but he forces himself to try and have a good day. He walks into the kitchen to find Heeseung and Sunghoon sitting at the table eating breakfast. Alright, Jay, just play it cool. Smooth operator, right?
He pours himself a bowl of cereal and takes a seat next to Sunghoon, across from Heeseung.
“Goodmorning,” Jay greets with an awful voice crack. Great. His cover is already blown. He meets Heeseung’s eyes only to find he’s already staring. After making eye contact, Heeseung quickly averts his gaze, deeming his toast way more interesting.
“Hi, Jay. How’d you sleep?” Sunghoon asks, almost knowingly. Weird.
“Oh, you know…” Jay trails off awkwardly.
Sunghoon hums in acknowledgement and goes back to scrolling on his phone. He eventually leaves, putting his dishes in the sink and joining Ni-ki on the couch. He leaves Jay with the very cause of his troubles. Well, there’s no avoiding it. Just be normal.
“So, hyung, what are your plans for today?” Jay questions with a sweet smile. They’re still best friends despite all the lingering feelings.
Heeseung’s face flashes with surprise at being spoken to for the quickest second before returning back to neutral. It happened so fast, one might’ve missed it. But, for a Heeseung enthusiast such as Jay, he caught it.
“Probably going to head to the studio and work on writing some songs.”
“Oh, for our next album? I heard from Jungwon that the managers wanted you to write some more stuff for us!” Jay replies in a cheery tone. The woes of the night before are vanishing the more he talks to his hyung.
“Yep,” Heeseung says curtly, ending the conversation.
Jay mixes his cereal, staring into the milk. Heeseung obviously doesn’t want to talk, but Jay really wants to. After the inner turmoil he’s been facing, he really just wants to feel their connection. So, he tries again.
“That’s cool! Do you have any plans yet, or are you still brainstorming?”
After a long pause, Heeseung looks up from his toast and replies, “Just brainstorming. I should probably start getting ready to leave.” And with that, he gets up and leaves the table. He even left his breakfast on the table! This guy.
“Okay, bye!” Jay yells after him, but Heeseung has already disappeared into his room.
So maybe everything wasn’t as fine as he thought it was. Well, that’s a problem for future Jay.
He gets up, cleaning up his dishes and Heeseung’s (who’s the hyung now?) and wanders over to the living room. He takes a seat on the armchair while Sunghoon and Ni-ki are together on the couch invested in some show.
Jay tries to watch for a bit, but he can only focus for so long before his mind drifts to Heeseung. Did he do something wrong? Why was breakfast so awkward?
His thoughts are interrupted when Heeseung strides past them towards the front door, saying he’ll be back later. He shuts the door before anyone can reply.
Jay looks at his fellow members to see their reactions, but their eyes are glued onto the TV. Why does no one else notice this odd behavior? Is Jay in some alternate dimension?
After ruminating on Heeseung some more, if that’s even possible, he decides to speak up. He simply asks, “Hey, does Heeseung-hyung seem off to you guys too?”
“Hm, no? He seems fine to me,” Sunghoon answers. Ni-ki doesn’t even spare a second glance, eyes intently focused on the TV.
“He’s been kind of weird ever since breakfast.”
“Well, last night he barely hung out with me. He sat with me for a bit and then locked himself in his room, just like you. Thought it was some lover’s quarrel,” Sunghoon giggles.
“Lover’s.. quarrel?” Jay sputters, face turning pink. Oh god. Is this how his members see them?
“Yeah. You guys were so weird in the car and then again here at home,” Sunghoon snickers, then turns his head back to the TV. He obviously doesn’t realize how much he’s just made Jay spiral.
Jay promptly excuses himself and goes back to his room.
He has to get to the bottom of this. Heeseung and him have fought before, of course, but this feels different. Not quite a fight but also not normal.
He pulls out his phone and opens his chat with Heeseung, determined to fix things.
Heeseung 🐹💝
me
Hi hyung! Sorry to bother your song writing, but I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.
You seemed off this morning.
Heeseung 🐹💝
im ok
just focused on our songs
sorry to worry u
me
Don’t be sorry! Just checking up on you. If you want to talk later we can!
Heeseung 🐹💝
thanks jongseong
see u tonight <3
me
See you later! :)
[seen]
Jay is still skeptical, but at least his texts didn’t get ignored. He even got a heart! He’s probably just stressed about the current comeback promotions and their upcoming projects already. Yeah. His behavior definitely isn’t because of Jay, right?
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
Days after the ring incident, Jay finds himself laying in bed. He and the group had completed a grueling dance practice that morning, but they were granted free time afterwards. He didn’t feel like going out or staying back at the studio to keep working. In fact, all he wanted right about now was quality time with Heeseung.
Since that day and the odd morning that followed, their relationship seems to have tensed. When Jay enters a room, Heeseung suddenly has to use the restroom. If Jay offers to cook, Heeseung apparently is too full to eat. Full? From what? One bowl of Ramyeon? Yeah, right. Just the thought has Jay scoffing. This obviously has to do with him.
He knows how moody Heeseung can get, but it’s usually never directed towards him. Even if Heeseung is icing the whole group out, he’ll still send a quick message to Jay assuring him that he’s okay. But lately? Radio silence.
It’s definitely stressing Jay out. Hell, he even fumbled so many times at their earlier dance practice that he earned a nasty scolding from Jungwon. It’s not his fault he’s being tortured by his hyung’s behavior!
“Jay!” Sunghoon’s loud voice wakes Jay from his Heeseung-trance and he looks up to see Sunghoon and his fellow 02z member, Jake. Jake’s been at their dorm floor a lot lately. He and Sunghoon must’ve picked up on Jay’s recurring sour mood, so they’ve been basically glued to his side.
“Want to do a live with us? Engenes want to see 02z!” Jake asks happily.
“Sure! Let’s do it,” Jay responds. This is just what he needs to get Heeseung off his mind. Jake and Sunghoon never fail to cheer him up. So, he grabs his stuff and follows his members to Sunghoon’s room.
The three boys shuffle into Sunghoon’s tidy space. Jake and Jay sit side by side as Sunghoon sets up a tripod. When Sunghoon sits down, Jay finds himself sitting between his fellow members. He feels really small like this.
After a quick visual check, they start the live.
“Hi, engene!” Jake greets in a sing-song voice. Even though they just started, there are already thousands of comments streaming in.
“Us 02z were due for a unit live,” says Sunghoon.
“Yep! We missed talking to you guys,” Jay adds with a small smile. He was still feeling a little down for obvious reasons, but he tries to put on his best face. The clip about the rings was already circulating, he doesn’t need another moment of his to get dissected online.
They end up recounting fond memories for most of the live, like the disastrous Amsterdam concert moment. But, Jay’s mind keeps wandering to a certain vocalist. He wonders how he’s feeling. He’s been doing that a lot lately. Wondering about his hyung. He hopes-
“Jay?” Jay looks over to see Jake staring intently at him. How long had he zoned out for?
“Tell the viewers about how funny Sunghoon’s face was in the elevator after the concert,” Jake continues with a giggle.
“Oh right… yeah, he was so mad!” Jay responds, remembering he is still live. He recalls the moment for engenes and misses how his members share a knowing look accompanied by a silent agreement over his shoulders.
“The whole incident was really our Jjongsaeng’s fault,” Sunghoon teases.
“What? No it wasn’t! It was all Jake,” Jay defends.
“No, it was definitely yours. Our baby cat,” Jake adds with a poke to Jay’s side.
Jay’s face flares up with embarrassment. These guys. Can he just have one moment of peace? That must be too much to ask for.
“It wouldn’t have even happened if you didn’t push me!”
“Aw, our Jjong is getting red! You’re so cute,” Sunghoon says with a cackle.
“Whatever.” Jay rolls his eyes, but his growing smile is evident.
“Wow, he’s even blushing. Engene, are you seeing this?” Jake says.
“I am not blushing.”
“You totally are!”
“Ugh, you guys are so dumb,” Jay grumbles. He even sticks his tongue out for added measure, but his bandmates just keep giggling and cooing at him.
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
“Why were you guys teasing me so much?” Jay questions with an accusatory tone following the end of their unit live. His pout is taking up his entire face at this point.
“We just wanted to see you smile again,” Jake says, unexpectedly sweet. “We know there’s something going on with you.”
Right. The “something” going on with him was none other than Heeseung. He almost forgot about their current standing. Almost.
“Oh,” Jay responds shyly, not ready to talk about his hyung with anyone else. “Well, thanks for the live. It was fun, even though you two basically just harassed me for an hour.”
“Any time!” Sunghoon shouts as Jay takes his leave. He even thinks he overhears the words “kitty” and “cute” as he descends down the hallway. They really never get tired, do they?
Once he’s back in the safety of his room, he gets ready for the night. As he’s picking out pajamas, he comes across a shirt he borrowed from Heeseung that he’s yet to give back. It’s a faded red shirt with a design of some singer his hyung likes. It fits him perfectly, but on Jay it’s quite oversized.
Even just looking at the shirt makes Jay’s heart ache. He really does miss him. He never realized how sad he could be without Heeseung until he no longer had him.
He changes into his shirt as one last attempt to feel close to him. If he thinks hard enough, it’s almost like Heeseung is hugging him. But, it’s not the real thing, is it?
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
Things for Jay and Heeseung seem to have hit a plateau. They’re in a middle ground. After days of walking on pins and needles, Jay headed to Heeseung’s room with a peace offering: snacks and drinks.
Albeit an awkward interaction, it seemed to have cleared some of the air. Heeseung had accepted his gift with a quiet ‘thank you’, reassuring Jay that things were okay. Despite the whole affair, he’s still not sure exactly where they stand.
Things between them are almost awkward. Awkward like the days at the very beginning of their friendship, when they were still learning what is and isn’t okay with each other.
Alas, Jay’s mom didn’t raise a quitter. Whenever he can, he offers (pesters) Heeseung to hangout with him. Most outings are shut down, but, if he’s lucky, every so often his hyung will accept. It really depends on the day. His hyung is just so complex!
It’s during one of these ‘pesterings’ that it all goes to shit.
One of Jay’s guilty pleasures in life is resting in Heeseung’s room. Late at night if he can’t sleep, he knows exactly where to go. He’s found a safe space in his hyung’s room, specifically his bed. They sleep together all the time, and no it’s not weird! It’s completely normal for two very close friends of ten years to want to sleep in the same bed together. Not weird at all…
Anyways, it’s one of those restless nights when Jay finds his feet dragging him down the hallway to Heeseung’s door. One knock… nothing. Okay, two knocks… still nothing.
“Hyung? It’s Jay, are you awake?”
Jay shuffles from foot to foot, waiting anxiously.
After an agonizing amount of time, the door unlocks and clicks open to reveal a beaten and disheveled Heeseung (and that’s being nice).
“Woah. Are you okay? You look… tired.”
“I’m great,” Heeseung replies in a clipped tone.
“Um, okay.” Jay suddenly feels nervous after perceiving his hyung’s current mood. “I was wondering if maybe I could stay over tonight? I can’t sleep.”
Heeseung doesn’t even respond with words, just a dead stare that goes straight through Jay’s soul.
“Heeseung-hyung?”
Jay notices some hesitation in Heeseung’s face before he ultimately replies, “No. I’m exhausted from today and would rather be alone so I can actually sleep.” He looks away as he speaks.
“Please? I promise I won’t accidentally kick you like last time!” Jay says, putting on his best kitty cat eyes.
“I said no, Jongseong. Why don’t you go ask Sunghoon? Or maybe your precious Jake will come up to our floor. Goodnight.” Heeseung shuts the door swiftly without even looking at Jay’s face.
Okay… What. Just. Happened.
Jay, embarrassed, walks back to his room passing a nosy Ni-ki who’s watching from the bathroom doorway on his phone, most likely texting his maknaez groupchat about what he just witnessed. He doesn’t want to even think of how Sunoo will make fun of him for this later.
Once Jay reaches his room, he lays on his bed and stares at the wall. His hyung had just been so mean! He could’ve said no in a nicer way. Why’d he even bring up Sunghoon and Jake? Would it kill Heeseung to just communicate in a normal way?
Jay also thinks about the glimmer of hesitancy that flashed on his hyung’s face. It was almost like he wanted to say yes, but something pushed him to instead reject Jay. He wished he knew what was going on in his head. What his woes were and what was troubling him. And, most importantly, what he could do to fix things.
Jay rolls over to his side and picks up his phone. He’s greeted by some intriguing messages.
02z 🐈⬛🐶🐧
Pyeonyuk Prince
We are viral.
So many clips from our live are going around LOL.
Baby Australian Puppy Sim Jaeyun
I SAW
why are we so funny lmfao
but jays the real star 💕
me
What’s going on?
Baby Australian Puppy Sim Jaeyun
look
link
Jay opens the link and is greeted by a post with so many likes and views. It’s a snippet from their recent live and it includes when his members teased him so hard he blushed! Apparently it’s even trending outside of their fandom space.
02z 🐈⬛🐶🐧
me
OMG
This is so embarrassing!!!!
How could you guys do this to me.
Pyeonyuk Prince
It’s cute ㅋㅋㅋ
Baby Australian Puppy Sim Jaeyun
its not our fault you act so babygirl on camera
✌️
me
🙄
You both are sleeping on the couch.
Baby Australian Puppy Sim Jaeyun
NO PLS PLS PLS PLS
Pyeonyuk Prince
“Sleeping on the couch” as if I’m going to let that happen.
Jay exits the chat. He feels his brain melting from this entire interaction. Those two need to be humbled one day.
As he’s plotting revenge on his offenders, he comes to a realization. Did Heeseung’s earlier behavior have something to do with those clips going around? He did suggest going to Jake or Sunghoon in that condescending tone. Was his hyung, gasp, jealous?! Over little old Jay being fawned over? Jay almost giggles and kicks his feet at the thought, but then he remembers he’s still being iced out.
The more he thinks about it, the more he wonders why Heeseung would even be jealous in the first place. They’re all friends here and are literally a part of a record-breaking group together. Why would his hyung be so bitter over these interactions?
Wait. Were his feelings maybe reciprocated? That feels like the only logical reasoning for such a jealous reaction. But, if that’s true, then why was Heeseung distancing himself? Shouldn’t he instead be reaching for Jay, not running away?
It’s all so overwhelming for Jay. Heeseung may as well be his first everything. His first best friend, first person to train with, and his first love. His desire for his hyung runs so deep that even he can’t comprehend it. He’s never felt this kind of yearning before.
But, at the end of the day, they’re just bandmates. How could they ever even have a successful relationship? They live in the public eye with no escape in sight. And on the off chance that Heeseung returns his feelings, he’d probably reason with Jay that it will never work out.
With that final thought, tears begin to cascade down Jay’s pretty face. He’s such a mess. Shame and guilt begin to consume him as he rests his head on his pillow. He’s probably just not good enough. That’s why Heeseung is treating him differently.
Moments before drifting to sleep, he thinks about Heeseung’s lovely face and his even sweeter personality. He’s truly one of a kind. Even if Jay can’t have him in the romantic capacity that he longs for, he will cherish what he has, always. No matter what happens, he’ll be forever unable to let go.
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
Following their comeback promotions, a new hardship appeared: concert preparations. Days and days filled solely with memorizing new dance breaks, strenuous vocal trainings, and plenty of strategy meetings touching on tactics to engage the crowds. Just more things to add to Jay’s plate.
You may be wondering, how is Jay faring after sleepovergate? The answer is he’s a wreck. He’s having trouble getting the new choreographies perfected. His voice keeps breaking at their practices. His suggestions on ways to hype the crowd are awkward and fall flat. Yes, he is totally off his game and we can thank Heeseung for that.
Jay already feels bad enough about his mental state and his work performance, but knowing the members can see it too really bothers him. He’s been staying at the studio after hours most days so he can work on his skills (and to get his mind off you know who).
It’s one of these nights where Jay is running choreography for one of their complicated dance breaks when a head pops into the practice room.
“Jay-hyung? You’re still here?”
Jay’s head turns towards the now shut door to see a politely standing Jungwon looking at him.
“I just got out of a meeting with the concert managers and saw the light still on in this room. Thought maybe we left it on. Why aren’t you at home yet?” Jungwon questions suspiciously.
Jay’s eyes flicker away from Jungwon and back to the mirrors. His tired eyes stare back at him.
“Just trying to get some extra practice in. Don’t want to keep disappointing everyone…”
“You think you’re disappointing us?” Jungwon is now well into the room, having set down his stuff. Great. This definitely means he’s going to grill Jay with an abundance of questions.
“I mean, aren’t I? I keep fucking everything up,” Jay responds with a weak voice. His throat is already starting to feel heavy.
“You’re not fucking anything up. We’re all struggling. Didn’t you see Sunghoon-hyung fumble during our choreography runs today? Or how I tripped during my killing part the other day? It’s not just you.” Jungwon’s tone is stern.
Jay doesn’t look up at Jungwon, he’s too focused on staring at his reflection. He really does look exhausted and his cheeks are a bit more hollow. He’s been dedicating his entire self to working lately. Anything to get his mind off Heeseung.
“Are you listening to me? Look at me, Jay-hyung.”
Jay turns around and sees Jungwon looking at him with arms crossed and an eyebrow raised.
“Why are you being so hard on yourself? Is this because of Heeseung-hyung?”
Jay’s eyes widen in fear.
“Heeseung-hyung? How do you… how do you know about that?” Jay stammers.
Jungwon scoffs and gives him a knowing look.
“It doesn’t take a genius to know there’s something off between you guys. You two are unnaturally close and all of sudden you’re not? Why don’t you take a break and talk to me.”
Jay looks around the room, feeling uncomfortable. This is just too vulnerable for him. It’s his burden, not anyone else’s. Jungwon’s already busy with so many other things, he doesn’t need to open this can of worms too.
“Jay-hyung, I can practically hear you thinking. Sit down and talk to me. Please?”
Jay weighs his options. He could sit down and confide in his friend or he could bottle it up and keep pushing himself to the brink. Option two is more appealing, but if he goes for that, Jungwon might sacrifice him to the wolves. Option one it is.
He takes a seat on the cold floor close to the mirror. He tilts his head back against it and stares into Jungwon’s awaiting eyes.
“Well, aren’t you going to sit too?”
Jungwon sits across from him with a giggle.
“Okay, talk to me. I’ve heard I’m quite a good listener.”
Jay plays with his fingers in his lap for some time.
“I just…”
How does he even start? The mention of those rings a few weeks started his downward spiral, him and Heeseung hardly even talk anymore, oh and he’s acting like he hasn’t been an idol for six years now. There you have it.
“There’s just a lot going on. Comeback season is always stressful and throwing in concert preparations has been hard.”
“That’s true, but it’s not like this is our first time doing all this. Hell, we were going through this same thing back during fate plus. And that was worse.”
Jungwon looks at Jay’s face for a reaction, but there’s nothing.
“Tell me about Heeseung-hyung. I won’t say anything. Not to our members or the company. Please, just talk to me,” Jungwon says with a pleading tone.
Jay sighs.
“It all happened so fast that I don’t even know what’s going on. He keeps shutting me out and pushing me away,” Jay says, voice laced with bitterness.
“I miss him.” A pause. “Fuck, I miss him so much. I live with him, but it feels like I don’t even know him.” Jay’s voice cracks a bit. “And I feel like I did something. I just don’t know what. But, it has to be my fault. It has to be.” He’s rambling at this point.
“Jay-hyung, it’s not your fault. Heeseung-hyung is just being stupid. You didn’t do anything and I want you to realize that.”
Jungwon scoots closer to Jay so that their knees are touching.
“Look at me.”
Jay meets his eyes and feels the tears that welled up begin to fall.
“What you and Heeseung-hyung have is very special. Something that no one else in our team has. I’ve known you guys for years and you two only seem to grow closer. Whatever is going on with him will not be forever. I know it.”
“Are you sure? It feels like everything is already over. Jungwon, he won’t even look at me!”
Jay’s tears are a waterfall at this point. Jungwon reaches a hand out and wipes them away delicately.
“Your relationship is not over. Stop being such a drama queen, hyung. He cares about you so much. Why do you think he wears that bracelet you made for him right before our debut everyday? Because he loves you.”
“Then why is he shutting me out?”
“Because our hyung is known for acting like an idiot when his feelings are hurt,” Jungwon jokes.
Jay lets out a short laugh.
“I guess so. I just never thought I’d be on the receiving end of his idiocy.”
“He must really be going through it, then. But, like I said, you’re an amazing friend to all of us and I want you to know that. And please, in the future, talk to me instead of killing yourself in the practice rooms like this.”
Jay hates to admit it, but it actually feels good to talk to someone about everything. He’s been bottling up his endless feelings and it has obviously not been helping. His dongsaeng is so mature and reassuring too. They grow up so fast!
“Thanks, Jungwon. You’re a good friend.”
“Tell me something I don’t know,” Jungwon snickers.
“Okay, you may go now.” Jay rolls his eyes.
“But, really, everything is going to be okay. Something tells me Heeseung-hyung is going to come around very soon.”
“I hope you’re right.”
“I’m always right!” Jungwon says. Then he adds, “Heeseung-hyung seriously needs to be punished for what he’s done. Our fans wouldn’t be happy to hear he caused their princess to cry every night for weeks.”
“I have not been crying every night!” Jay defends.
“Your room is right beside Ni-ki’s and he tells me the walls are very thin.”
“You two will be dealt with,” Jay threatens, but there’s no bite behind it. “Sunoo too! You three gossip too much for my liking.”
Jungwon shoves him and Jay laughs. He feels his worries fade a bit. Their conversation was like a breath of fresh air. A light in the darkness that Jay has been desperately navigating.
He’s determined to get through this disaster. Hopefully with Heeseung by his side. He doesn’t even need that stupid ring anymore, just his best friend with him.
— ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ —
Jay has been feeling lighter and lighter in the days that followed his talk with Jungwon. He’s no longer awake during the late hours of the night letting his thoughts about Heeseung run wild. He begins smiling a little more. He even has been making excellent progress in his idol related activities following his short lived slump!
Yes, everything is looking up and seemingly back to normal. Except for… sigh, his relationship with heeseung. Are we surprised?
Jungwon’s assurances that Jay did nothing wrong only comforted him for so long. If this really had nothing to do with him, why have they remained so tense with each other?
Who knows at this point. Jay sure doesn’t. But, he’s determined not to fall apart over a man. One who has a screentime of probably 23 hours at that.
Yes, you heard it here first, Jay is entering his healing era. He’s going to start living life without his usual Heeseung-addled lense. Of course, he still loves him through and through, but he won’t settle for him until he sorts his shit out and communicates with Jay properly.
Jay has even picked up manifestation. He doesn’t chase, he attracts! And he hopes to attract his beautiful hyung. Valentine's is around the corner. Tomorrow, to be exact. And Jay is such a romantic, everyone knows this!
Anyways, Jay is currently gathering clothes to change into after his shower. He ends up picking a nice matching black set.
He walks down the hallway to the bathroom. From the doorway he glances at Heeseung’s closed door. He wonders what he’s doing in there. Wait, no! Jay does not wonder and he does not care. No chasing, only attracting, remember?
Jay shuts the door and walks over to turn the shower on. He undresses and steps into the tub.
He does a little extra self care tonight. As mentioned before, Valentine's is the next day, so he wants to be in his best condition, just in case!
After a long shower (that definitely wasn’t filled with Heeseung related thoughts), Jay steps out and dries off. He applies a nice sweet scented lotion and changes into his cozy pajamas.
As he leaves to return to his bedroom, he notices Heeseung’s door open. Maybe he was in the kitchen making something? Whatever, Jay certainly does not care. He has some meditation to do in his room.
He enters his room and shuts the door. He clicks on the light switch and turns around only to jump at the ominous and lanky figure hovering awkwardly in the middle of his room. He even shrieks, but he would later deny that.
“Heeseung-hyung? Um, what are you doing in here?” Jay asks with confusion written all over his face.
“Just waiting for you,” Heeseung replies, making eye contact with Jay for once in his life.
“In the dark?”
A nervous giggle escapes Heeseung. He plays with the bracelet Jay made for him on his wrist for a moment. Jungwon was right, Heeseung really does still wear it.
Heeseung then says, “Yeah. Sorry for scaring you. This just couldn’t wait.”
Jay chews his lip. “Okay. What’s up?”
“We need to talk.”