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Ottawa Centaurs @ottowacentaurs
Announcement: Our players are all mic'd up in today's game against Seattle.
Special announcement: they don't know they are mic'd up.
Let's go, centaurs!!!
The moment this post came up on Harris' phone his heart skipped a beat. Or five beats. He didn't know if he should cry or laugh. Maybe both at the same time. Maybe just die on the spot. Nobody told him about this plan, probably because he would veto it. Sure this is gonna be a fun thing for everybody. For every fan, every viewer, even the players, but not for him. This will give him his first grey hairs, sleepless nights and a heart attack. He is not religious, but at times like this he sends his prayers to every god he has ever heard of.
Ottawa Centaurs @ottawacentaurs
We are proud to have the first hockey husbands in history leading our team.
However we're excusing pro forma for the menace on our team, called Ilya Rozanov. Since none of the players knows about this, our PR-manager @HarrisDrover does not recommend watching the mic’d up version with kids. You can find both versions available for stream, Links below.
↪ WeloveHockey @Centaursfanoftheyear
I'm just hoping somebody watches @HarrisDrover closely throughout the game. We love your reels and insights too much!!
↪ Shane for Win @Hollanderfan1
I’m not sure if we are ready for this, but I’m so in!!
↪ Elisa @Elisa2304
Not an official warning for the own team. I’m so locked in now. Go cents, Go husbands!
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
first correct description of Ilya Rozanov i’ve ever read on this app
For the first minutes of the game nothing spectacular happens, a few chirps here and there, but nothing special Harris had to worry about. But a menace named Ilya Rozanov will change this very soon.
Ilya sits next to Shane on the bench, it's one of the rare games where Shane centers Ilya on the first line. Wiebe calls this an unexpected change from time to time. Ilya calls it only logical, to have the best player in the league (him) and second best player (his husband) on the ice at the same time.
"Ready to bet?" Ilya nudges Shane with his padded shoulders and wiggles his eyebrows. "Ready to lose, Rozanov?" is Shanes only answer. In Ilya's face now a wicked grin, he keeps talking while watching his second line closely. "Whoever scores more goals today wins. Winner is choosing price. So what's your stake, moy kot?" "When I win, and the focus is on when not if, you stop calling me ridiculous pet names and this thing with your tongue tonight. Your stake?" Shane states confidently. "But you like them." Ilya crumbles and pouts, while Shane laughs.
Next to them you can see Luca rolling his eyes. "Choach, dad and dad arguing and or flirting again." he groans in Wiebes' direction, who just shrugs his shoulders. This is nothing new for him. He’s with these players for more than four years. Are they a little bit too much? YES. Are they the best players? Also yes. Whatever keeps them going.
"Okay when I win, I get one orgasm from you for every goal either you or I scored today, ok?" Ilya smiles confidently. You can hear several people groan in the background, but Bood's voice is ridiculously pleading. "Please Hollander win, I got the room next to you and I can't do this again. Not again the whole night." Ilya grins, while Shane's face gets red, but there is a little smirk, you can see it clearly through the cameras. "Oh stop complaining, it's best sex you'll ever listen to." He's next on the ice and shouts something to Shane, the TV starts to translate with a little delay. "Davayte zab'yom neskol'ko golov! Moy seksual'nyy pomidor." Let’s score some goals! My sexy tomato.
Harris Drover @HarrisDover
We ensure everybody that @IlyaRozanov81 gets weekly PR and ‘workplace behavior’ training. However he is resistant to advice.
WE ARE SORRY you have to listen to that.
↪ Rozanov @Rozanov4life
Don’t be sorry Harris, I need to know more. I would do anything to be Shane Hollander tonight.
↪ Chris @CentaursNr1
Not @LucaHaas calling them dad and dad! I can’t!!!!
↪ Shane for Win @Hollanderfan1
Anyone catched the WHOLE NIGHT comment from Boodram? THE WHOLE NIGHT
↪ WeloveHockey @Centaursfanoftheyear
He said THE WHOLE NIGHT AGAIN. Excuse me sir, again? Aren’t you exhausted after a game??
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
It’s annoying having the room next to them, i feel for you @BoodramHockey
↪ Freckles we Love @Holl4ander24
We’re leading with two orgasms, I mean goals. Keep scoring boys!!
↪ Elisa @Elisa2304
Need to know about the ‘thing with your tongue’ is.
Stats and more @HockeyStats
We did a quick research. Most goals in one game combined from @IlyaRozanov81 and @ShaneHollander24?
7 while playing on the same team, 8 playing against each other.
↪ Emma @Hollanov4eva
OMG, poor or lucky @ShaneHollander24? I can’t decide.
NHL @nhl
Ottawa - Seattle: 2-0 after the first period. Goals by @IlyaRozanov81 and @ShaneHollander24
↪ Michaela @centaur1997
The official score is Hollander - Rozanov: 1-1.
↪ Doris @hockeyfansince1976
I never was so interested in a game
H-Gossip @HockeyGossip
Is it a good idea to mic players up, without them knowing? If you listen to @HarrisDover the answer is a hard no! If you listen to the fans in the comment section? The answer is definitely YES!
Link: Ilya Rozanovs and Shane Hollanders bizarre goal bet. click here to read more.
Twelve minutes into the second period the centaurs led 3-1. Ilya and Shane both played their top game and killed it on the ice. It’s scary to see them both communicating without words, not that they don’t talk, they talk plenty, maybe too much, but never about a pass or signaling who is free. It’s like their minds are in sync. Both of them standing near the bench, drinking while the game is interrupted due to problems with the net of Seattle's goal .
“Hey handsome, you new here?” Ilya grins at Shane playfully while grabbing the bottle out of Hollanders hand. “Sorry to interrupt you, but I’m not interested. I’m happily married to the second best player in the league.” Shane grins back, already chuckling. “Take that back, I’m best player!” he launches at Shane who is skating away full on laughing now. The cameras catch both of them laughing while Ilya chases Shane across the ice. “See you’re too slow to catch me.” Shane laughs while both of them skating in circles, changing directions at full speed like it’s nothing. “Rozanov, Hollander! Stop playing around. I know you two are childish knuckleheads, but please behave once in your life.” Coach Wiebe bells at them. “Just once.” he let’s out pleading.
This causes Shane to stop abruptly like he’s remembering they are not five and on a playground, causing Ilya to skate into him at full speed. Both holding on to each other while falling, Ilya turns them around, keeping Shane safe and taking the hit with the cold ice himself, while Shane lands somewhat soft on him. “See you always falling for me. Because I’m best hockey player.” Ilya laughs a second later. “Whatever you need to tell yourself to sleep good at night.” Shane teases, rolling his eyes. “I need nothing but my beautiful husband by my side.” Ilya winks and smiles softly. “Ya tebya lyublyu.” is Shanes only answer. I love you.
“Barrett, Dykstra! Help those idiots to get up.” Wiebe sighs while shaking his head dismissively. If you look closely enough you can see a little smile on his face. “Can’t believe those two idiots are the best of the league. Acting like they are kindergardners.” he mutters under his breath, while Barrett extracts Shane from Ilya. Shane and Evan both help Ilya up. Troy gives the husbands a pointed look. “You two are causing trouble today.” “What can I say, I’m a happy man today.” Ilya smugs, causing Troy and Evan to groan, while Shane just sheepishly smiles and replies to Ilya. “You looked good this morning, paying your debts.”
Just a little over one minute is left in the second period.
“Haas. Stop thinking too much, I can hear your brain working, it is annoying.” Ilya nudges Haas who is just shrugging his shoulders staring at the ice in front of the bench. “What he means is you can talk with us, whatever is bothering you.” Shane chimes in giving his husband a pointed look. “I would have said that, if I meant it like this.” Ilya pouts. “Stop being an asshole, Rozanov.” Shane elbows him in the ribs, causing Ilya to mumble something about “my husband doesn’t love me anymore.” “So what's wrong?” Shane asks Haas again. “Lost my lucky charm, had it before the game, don’t know where it is right now..” Haas mumbles, knowing how dumb this sounds, but he is superstitious. “The friendship bracelet Boods kid gave you?” Ilya asks much softer this time, now knowing why Haas looks like a child without his favorite candy. “Mhhm.” Luca nods his head, while Shane slings an arm around Haas shoulders, squeezing reassuringly.
“This break, you're all on your hands and knees in locker room.” Ilya screams in the direction of the other players, causing them to look floored and shocked. It’s a rare look on their faces after years with Rozanovs shenanigans. Dykstras jaw dropped in shock. “What the fuck?” Barrett mumbles “If this is one of your and Hollander's fantasies, keep us out of it.”, Bood screams back, shaking his head in disbelief. “No idiots, Haas lost his lucky charm, we will find it!” Ilya shouts back. And he could leave it at this, but it’s Rozanov we’re talking about. “None of you assholes get to see my beautiful and sexy husband naked.” Ilya states. “We literally see him naked every day, we all shower together.” Chouinard shouts back, shaking his head while laughing. “Right.” Ilya considers while Shane laughs too. “Okay nobody gets to see beautiful face my husband makes while he’s completely satisfied.” Rozanav stands and Shane smacks his gloved fist at the back of Ilya's helmed head, while blushing like always. You can hear everyone in earshot groan. The buzzer saves everyone from more details.
HOCKEY NEWS - NHL
THE BIZARRE BET(S) BETWEEN ILYA ROZANOV AND SHANE HOLLANDER
Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander are professional Hockey players at the Centaurs Ottawa. They are also husbands, married to each other for 5 years.
Back in the day they were rivals, at which point this changed is still unknown. What’s known is both of them are competitive by default. Several teammates, friends and family confirmed this. How crazy the stakes in their own bets are was never disclosed, until today.
The centaurs mic’d up their players, without their knowledge. revealing a bizarre goal bet between Rozanov and Hollander. We are not sure how to write this best, so just watch the video.
LINK TO VIDEO
Later in game, during an intermission Hollander spills the beans about Rozanov looking good, paying his last debts this morning. This happened after Rozanov chased Hollander across the ice, like two kids playing tag.
Continue reading
Ottawa Centaurs @ottawacentaurs
Playing tag to keep those muscles warm? Our players @IlyaRozanov81 and @ShaneHollander24 know the drill!
Leading 4-1, GO CENTS!!!!
(Video attached of Rozanov chasing Hollander across the ice, both laughing and crashing into each other in the end.)
↪ Jackie Pike @JackiePike
Uncle Shane and Uncle Ilya live and in action! The kids, Hayden and I miss you two ❤️
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
I’m not missing Rozanov, stop spreading lies baby!
↪ Freckles we Love @Holl4ander24
Not them playing tag like little children and @ShaneHollander24 telling his husband I love you in russian. My heart melts!
↪ Hollinov @fanofboth
Lowkey interested to learn more about the last bet, what were the stakes, what was the bet?
↪ WeloveHockey @Centaursfanoftheyear
That’s what I need to know!!
↪ Rozanov @Rozanov4life
Just Rozanov being a total cutie and menace at the same time.
↪ Chris @CentaursNr1
Not dad and dad helping @LucaHaas with his lucky charm. They are dad and dad fr!!!
↪ Shane for Win @Hollanderfan1
Rozanov flirting with Hollander, like they are not married to each other
↪ HOLLAROZ @hockeyhusbandsfan
And them teasing each other like every other married couple, they are sooooooooo cute
↪ Michaela @centaur1997
Cute and horny.
↪ Elisa @Elisa2304
Just hoping @YunaHollander and @DavidHollander not watching the version where their son and son-in-law are mic’s up.
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
They've seen and heard much worse. we all did.
NHL @nhl
Ottawa - Seattle: 4-1 after second period. Goals by @IlyaRozanov81 and @TroyBarrett17 and @MichaelHenry33
↪ Michaela @centaur1997
The official score is Hollander - Rozanov: 1-2, but who counts
↪ WeloveHockey @Centaursfanoftheyear
heart attacks of @HarrisDrover: approx. 9
↪Harris Drover @HarrisDover
17. just today. @IlyaRozanov81 owes me at least one spa weekend and three weeks of vacation after this season!
↪ Shane for Win @Hollanderfan1
Need to see the beautiful face @ShaneHollander24 makes while being completely satisfied
↪ Freckles we Love @Holl4ander24
YES! YES! YES!
↪ Hollinov @fanofboth
Please!!!!!!!!!
Harris Drover @HarrisDrover
@IlyaRozanov81 weekly PR training and workplace behavior training is daily from now on.
I can’t believe this man has no filter. @ShaneHollander24 2 questions: Why him? and How do you survive?
↪ KipGrady @KipGradyOfficial
No one knows how he survives!
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
exactly my questions when i found out about those two
“That’s orgasm number six, baby!” Ilya shouts in Shane's direction while the buzzer signals another goal for the centaurs. Fourteen minutes left on the clock, Ottawa leading 7-1. Four goals from Rozanov, two from Hollander and one from Barrett. As predicted Shane's face turns red again, which Ilya finds adorable.
“I hate my life.” Bood grumbles clearly thinking about the fact, he got the room next to Hollander and Rozanov. “Dear god, please take me. I didn’t do anything bad to deserve this.” “Wrong, Cassie told us you leave laundry all over the floor and dirty dishes in the sink, plus you never tell her how pretty she is.”, Ilya states while sitting back on the bench. Dykstra laughs so hard he spits out his water, not knowing whats coming next. “Stop laughing Evan. Caitlyn said she wanted to surprise you for your anniversary with sexy dessous and you came home drunk and fell asleep on couch. Both of you are disgusting husbands.” “How the fuck do you know this, I haven’t told this anybody?” “Oh the WAGs had the biweekly wine night last thursday.”, Ilya grins and Shane laughs wholeheartedly. “You, at the WAGs wine night?”, Barrett asks disbelievingly. “Yes, every second thursday if we don’t have game, I’m one of the girls.” Rozanov shrugs his shoulders, like it’s no big deal.
“You knew about this Hollander?” “Of course. I love my quiet evenings for the last two years.”, Shane smiles. “TWO YEARS?”, Bood screams, causing Coach Wiebe to look in their direction. “Could we please stay focused on this game?”, he asks his players, knowing it's an impossible task. “But he is at the WAGs winenights.”, Bood cries back, like a little toddler throwing a tantrum. “Makes sense, especially since he’s the WAG of the best hockey player in the league.” Coach answers. “That’s a lie! I’m best player!”, Ilya screams. “Prove it and score another goal.”, Wiebe counters. “Please don’t.”, you hear Hollander and Bood say at the same time, for completely different reasons.
“Hollander, tell us what bothers you about Rozanov.”, Bood and Dystkra both with demanding looks on their face. Rozanov is in the penalty box, so the both of them take the chance to question Shane. He looks at them and shakes his head. “You won’t tell us?”, Zane pouts and Shane shakes his head again. “No, there is nothing that bothers me.”, Shane shrugs with a lovely smile on his face. “WHAT?” Evan shouts. “You can’t mean this.” “I do, I let you know a big secret about Ilya Rozanov. okay?”, Shane grins, both of them nodding eagerly. “His filter between brain and mouth is rarely working. But that’s adorable in a unique way and he never let out something we said is private." Shane begins. Haas mutters something like “this is the filtered version?” but Shane keeps going. “He’s really attentive, helped me through panic attacks and other crisis. accepts my need for cleanliness and order, remembers me to eat and sleep when I’m stuck in my head. He’s the best uncle to Pikes children, to Anya and any other kid in the world. I never once needed to ask for anything, never since I fell in love with him at the World Juniors all those years ago. So he’s maybe an asshole and just second best hockey player of the league, but he’s definitely the perfect husband.”
“Did you just say World Juniors? Like World Juniors in 2008?”, Barrett asks disbelievingly. All eyes are on Shane in pure disbelief. “Yeah, we never told you? Retrospectively we fell in love back then, but the first time we were together was after the commercial shoot, he invited himself to my hotel room.”
“What are you talking about, moy dorogoy?” My darling. Ilya asks while coming back to the bench after his penalty time is done. A loving look on his face, focused on his husband. “You two, since rookie year?” Haas points between Shane and Ilya with his gloved hand, still shocked. “The summer before.”, both answer at the same time and chuckle afterwards while glancing lovely at each other. None of them said anything besides the soft whispers between Shane and Ilya. “I thought we told them already.”, Shane sounding apologetic and Ilya's heart couldn’t stand it. “It’s okay baby.” He slings one arm around Shane's shoulders and pulls him toward himself. “Everyone can know. I loved you since you introduced yourself and told me I couldn’t smoke there. I was hypnotized by your beautiful freckles, still am, flashed by everything you said, even if I understood just half of it in the beginning. Ya tebya lyublyu.” Ilya whispers at Shane. Who repeats those words.
Yuna Hollander @YunaHollander
My favorite son and his husband. ❤️(since the summer before)
We're proud of you guys!
(Photos of Ilya and Shane over the years.)
↪ Jackie Pike @JackiePike
I can hear @IlyaRozanov81 in my ears: ‘Look baby I’m Mamas favorite.’
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
yes, delusional like always
↪ Harris Drover @HarrisDrover
You and David are my favorite out of all the Hollander/Rozanovs, the only ones who doesn’t trigger heart attacks on a daily basis! I love you guys!
NHL @nhl
Ottawa - Seattle: 7-1 final score. Goals by @IlyaRozanov81 and @ShaneHollander24
↪ Michaela @centaur1997
final score: Hollander - Rozanov: 2-4, good luck @ShaneHollander24
↪ Freckles we Love @Holl4ander24
can’t wait for them to find out about the mic’d up situation. and WTF? Since 2008???
↪ Hollinov @fanofboth
Not on my Bingo card: @IlyaRozanov81 being a perfect husband
↪ HaydenPike @HaydenPike35
not on mine either.
↪ WeloveHockey @Centaursfanoftheyear
loved Haas ‘this is the filtered version?’ same brother same
↪ Rozanov @Rozanov4life
Lowkey jealous at Shane.
↪ Chris @CentaursNr1
Never thought of Rozanov as a big softie
↪ Jackie Pike @JackiePike
He’s the biggest softie of all time, and one of the prettiest princesses while playing with the kids
↪ Chris @CentaursNr1
Evidence, we need evidence
↪ Shane for Win @Hollanderfan1
Dad and dad have been seeing each other since 2008. TWO THOUSAND EIGHT, TWO ZERO ZERO EIGHT.
↪ HOLLAROZ @hockeyhusbandsfan
I can’t believe this fact. Please @VoyageursOfficial fans, we expect excuses.
Ottawa Centaurs @ottawacentaurs
And that’s a wrap for this game! We will be back in 2 minutes with the press conference!! Stay tuned!
(Video attached: Harris standing in the locker room and telling the team they’d been mic’d up the whole time)
“Guys be quiet, just for two minutes.”, Wiebe yells at his team, and everybody goes silent. “The stage is yours Harris.” “Thanks coach, so guys, y’all been secretly mic’d up during this game. And I have to tell you one thing. I hate you all!”, Harris starts and you can see the changes in everyone's face. Rozanov is the first to react and smirks straight at the camera. “So we’ve got witnesses, I won the bet. I’m best player.” Hollanders face on the other side is bright red. “Rozanov, Hollander, Bood, you’re up for press in twenty. And please remember your PR training Roz.” The screen goes dark, but you can hear Rozanov in the background talking to Shane. "It's okay moy Lyubimy. If anyone asks stupid question, I'll kill them, da?"