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The BBC: How The Duchess & Duchess Consort of Montrose Protect Their Peace
One year ago, the now Duchess and Duchess Consort of Montrose got married in a lavish wedding in Edinburgh. It broke the mold for a lot of reasons.
It was the first same sex royal wedding, the first royal wedding outside England and the Anglican Church, made Michaela Stirling the first Duchess Consort, and yet felt so traditional in many ways. Ahead of their anniversary, I sat down with the couple making their own rules. I got to really understand what life is like for the quiet pair, who used to make headlines most weeks.
They’ve settled into a recently renovated apartment in the Palace of Holyroodhouse, a royal residence in Edinburgh that has been without any full time residents for centuries.
“It wasn’t very homely, or practical for daily life,” Francesca remarked.
“But we’re very happy with how it turned out, it feels like us now,” Michaela smiled, her eyes softening, so I asked what else felt authentic to themselves. “I still have my home in the highlands, so we try to stay there regularly.”
“And my family are constantly wanting us in London more,” Francesca laughed, “so we try to head down at least once a month.” I can’t help but ask if London still feels like home.
“Anywhere can be home, which I know is a cheesy thing to say, but it’s true. I obviously have close friends and family in London that make it feel like home, but not in a way that makes anywhere in Scotland not feel like home as well.” Home continues to be a running theme throughout the interview, both of them constantly harking back to the comfort they find themselves in. Even their work, both of them now solidly full time working royals, has an ease to it.
I was keen to mention the updated Royal website, referencing their work in disability rights, championing sustainability, and LGBTQIA+ advocacy. They both have a varied resume, and particularly enjoy being aligned in their endeavours.
“My married siblings were really good at demonstrating the value in a cohesive partnership, and why it matters that we have the same goals,” The Duchess explained, easily finding another way to allude to the closeness of her and her siblings.
“Which meant that when I came into the fold, into this environment, I was supported to bring my own contributions and have them be equally understood,” Her Grace added. Soon after, she momentarily allowed her careful demeanor to fall into something more casual, “it was important to me that with my new position and platform, I could still continue my work towards collective and sustainable communities. I think individualistic ideals can rot a society.”
“And it wouldn’t be a fair partnership if I didn’t recognise and support that.” I asked if mutual support is the foundation of their relationship, hoping for a neat quote and summation.
“It should be the foundation of every relationship,” Francesca said with an almost imperceptible shrug. It was evident that they both thought it was an obvious and necessary principle.
Around the edges of our more structured interview, I was able to witness their organic and daily partnership. They do a lot of their own cooking and day to day chores, using it as a way to spend time together. Francesca was keen to point out her small but thriving herb garden on the kitchen windowsill, and Michaela proudly showed me the eggs from their chickens in Kilmartin. The meetings with their teams are casual, but they always make the effort to put them in a separate area of the palace to where they live. They have great peace, but it’s clear that it was a journey to get there—so now it’s something they fiercely protect. It prompted me to ask what the country wants to know: will they have children?
Michaela looked to her wife for advice, as if her crash course of royal media training didn’t quite get this far. Michaela kept feeding their cat and emptying the dishwasher, perhaps as a distraction, while Francesca spoke slowly.
“We’ve had discussions, it’s a consideration. Obviously as a queer couple there are more considerations and investments to be made. It’s not going to be easy as it was for any of my siblings, and everyone knows that.”
“So your families are supportive of whatever your future holds?”
“Of course,” Michaela piped in, “whatever happens will be an extension of our love, which they support.”
“Even if that just means we get another cat.”
“And do you think,” I treaded carefully, capitalising on the light hearted feel of the room following Francesca’s comment, “that it would integrate with your work advocating for LGBTQIA+ people? You do it already, but it seems to be what’s expected of you.”
“It’s normal for people to have expectations,” Michaela replied as if she had already prepared for the question, “and it’s okay to meet those expectations, it’s just important that you view them separately to yourself.”
“The question of our hypothetical children is unrelated to our care and commitment to our queer community,” Francesca added, in a way that felt like it was tying off the conversation in a neat bow. They both seemed eager to shut the doors of their home life and protect their peace for another year, but I didn’t mind.
Let’s rock and roll, it’s time for the baby sequel.
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–Grace Williams xo