Work Text:
February 2017
Coach Theriault barges into the locker room after an easy 6–0 home game against the Ottawa Centaurs coming back from their road trip after the All-Star weekend in Tampa. The usual adrenaline high of a shutout is non-existing to moderate today. Normally the Montreal Voyageurs would be buzzing. But it does not feel like a real win if they destroy such a low ranked team. It feels more like a regular—maybe even game free—day.
Shane glances at his phone when it vibrates. Without hesitating he opens the incoming message.
Lily
How does it feel stealing kid lollipop?
Shane
Fuck off.
I can’t change it that we have to play Ottawa. I’m not gonna hold back because they’re shit.
„Well! The GM had a glorious idea again. PR is also involved“, Theriault groans and catches Shane’s attention. He shoves his phone back into his locker. Face down. Hayden furrows his brows in sight of Shane. Shane only shrugs and nudges his head towards Theriault to shift Hayden’s attention to Coach’s announcement. „For some reason GM thinks it’s a good idea to have you all help at the blood donation rally before next game. Something, something helping a good cause. This kinda bullshit. I need you all there with a huge fucking smile!“, Coach barks. With a rolling hand motion he adds: „Now shower! I want to be home by seven.“ J.J.’s hand lands on Shane’s shoulder. „Captaine, you exited to help the good cause?“, he drags in his Quebecois accent. „Always“, Shane murmurs. Those PR events where big fan crowds are present always give Shane anxiety. They involve too many strangers that want his attention at the same time, asking questions he hadn’t prepared an answer for and often times involve small talk on his personal life.
***
An e-mail with information on the blood donation rally pings into Shane’s inbox. On his TV the Boston Bears game is running. They are in the third third and Boston is currently tided at 3–3. Ilya is in front of the Admirals’ goal. Eric Bennet is following his movements closely. He fakes a shot but Eric doesn’t move and is able to catch Ilya’s real shot. Ilya cusses with big facial movements and even bigger gestures. Shane snickers. He will definitely find something to say to Ilya about this later. He grabs his phone before the next puck drop happens.
The e-mail reads:
Hello Voyageurs,
Please find attached the forms you should fill out before donating blood at the Montreal Voyageurs Blood Donation Rally. We are looking forward to having you all with us, helping and donating blood.
In the attachments are medical report papers and consent forms. Shane draws his brows together. He thought he would be helping get people signed in, giving out snacks after donations, something like that; not that he’s supposed to donate blood himself. He is not afraid of needles or anything. His job requires regular medical check-ups by the team doctors and frequent drug and doping testing.
He scrolls through the medical questionnaire.
What is your age?
What is your height?
What is your weight? If you are under 110lbs we kindly ask you to not donate blood.
Have you lived in the United Kingdom before 1996 for more than 6 months? If yes, we kindly ask you to not donate blood.
He reads further.
Do you regularly have penetrative same-sex sexual encounters? If yes, we kindly ask you to not donate blood.
He looks up to the TV where Ilya’s lined up for the next face off. The camera zooms into his and Scott Hunter’s faces. The puck drops and Ilya passes it to his linemate.
Well fuck this. Shane is not going to state this in his questionnaire! What if his teammates or management see his form? He locks his phone screen and throws it into his sofa cushions. With a grunt he grabs his can of ginger ale and follows the Bears–Admirals game. Now and then he sips a bit of his drink.
***
Lily
You could just lie, Mr. Always-Correct
Shane reads the message again and again, after he explained Ilya that he would need to find a loop-hole for the whole blood donation fiasco.
Shane
Why do I even ask you for advice?!
Lily
Because I give best advice
Lily
I advise you to suck my dick, next time we see again.
Shane rolls his eyes. He drops another cup of plain greek yogurt into his shopping cart and strolls through the supermarket where he always buys his groceries. Somehow nobody has ever stopped him here for a photo or an autograph. That is one of the reasons why he likes to come here. Another is that the speakers in the store apparently broke down after he came there for the fourth time and they never were fixed. It is quieter than the grocery store two streets down.
***
Shane only has one and a half days left to figure something out. „I will bring the kids“, Hayden says while they are on the ice lining up for the drill. „Huh?“, Shane asks. Hayden sometimes starts conversations in the middle of nowhere with no context clues whatsoever. At least for Shane.
„To the donation rally. Duh!“, Hayden exclaims. „I think it will be fun. Jackie can’t donate of course with the pregnancy and all but I guess some of the others will also bring their children.“ They are next in line for the drill. Shane swings his stick in the movement he needs for the drill. He plans his next movements—hopefully in tandem with Hayden. Ilya always jokes that Hayden is the 15th best player on the Voyageurs roster but Hayden is first line with Shane and alternate captain. He knows to perform and even if he’s chatty at practice when they start the drill the puck bounces between Shane and Hayden and with a strong backhand Shane puts the puck behind their starting goalie. „Great! Again!“, Coach Theriault yells. They restart the drill and why ever: their goalies leaves the same spot open for Shane to put the puck into the net. „Could you at least try to hold the puck?“, Shane questions under his breath.
„So, you brining someone for the rally?“, Hayden ask when they line up for the next drill. Shane shakes his head.
„You could bring Rose Landry“, Hayden suggests. Shane stares into Hayden’s face. Not really believing what he just said.
„She is busy filming. And we broke up. You know that.“ Shane slides one of his hands out of his glove and fiddles with a loose edge of his tape.
„I know. I know! But one could hope. You never introduced us—which I’m still mad about! When would I ever have the chance to meet Rose Landry again?! Huh?! She is a movie star and in one of Jackies favorite films. This could have been epic!“, Hayden rambles.
„We are friends. She was thinking to visit me at the cottage this summer or when the season ends here in Montreal. She has to check her schedule though. And we have to see how far we are going to make it into the play-offs.“ Hayden shakes his head. „Unbelievable“, he mutters. „What about Boston Lily?“, Hayden asks louder. Shane suddenly shoves his hand back into his glove. „Do you really think someone from Boston would actually come to Montreal for a stupid blood donation rally?“, Shane encounters defensively. „She was here for lesser reasons“, Hayden tries to remind him. Shane starts skating without a reply and starts the next drill. „Good, our gossips are with us at this practice! Hollander! Pike! You’re doing suicide sprints for the next five minutes“, Coach barks.
Shane starts sprinting from line to line without complaint.
***
Hayden
Sorry for the suicide runs
Shane
It’s fine. Good for conditioning
Shane stares at his phone while laying on his couch. The latest google search now open after he’d prepared dinner for himself around half an hour ago. He had typed in: reasons not to be eligible to donate blood canada
The Canadian Blood Service website is the first hit. There is a whole lot of reasons as to why people could not donate blood listed in their FAQ. One of the things could be something which would made him not able to donate his blood at the rally. He had only one full day left to figure something out.
He is over 17.
He weighs more than 110lbs. Even chopping off a leg still has him over 110lbs as his leg is about 20% of his body weight. Not feasible as he imagines skating with one leg is impossible. At least for him.
He did not have any surgeries in the last 3 months, including any dental extractions within the last 72h. Well, his wisdom teeth would need to be removed at some point. But that would probably fuck up his game for at least a full week, maybe even two. So that is not an option.
He is not pregnant. Curiosity makes Shane google if there are any abnormal cases of pregnancy in men. He finds an outrageously long Reddit post on male pregnancy. It seems non-medical and not very science-based. Somehow some answers link to a website where stories are written on famous people or existing media and its fictional characters.
Shane
Did you know there are stories on the internet where you are pregnant?
Shane
It’s called mpreg
Lily
What the fuck?
Lily
Send me the link
Shane does not send Ilya the link. He switches back to the Canadian Blood Service website.
He never lived in the UK. At least he doesn’t think he ever did.
Shane
Did we ever live in the UK before 1996?
Mom
No. Why, honey?
Shane
Just wanted to make sure I don’t have Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease
He did not have any piercings or tattoos done in the last three months. He doesn’t have any at all. This reminds him of the hideous bear tattoo on Ilya’s chest. Which he had traced more than a hundred times—at least. Shane’s thoughts wander off to the image of Ilya’s sculptured chest he projects in his mind. He can picture every mole, every tattoo line and the form of Ilya’s nipples. He wishes he could peck a kiss on Ilya’s skin there now. Maybe even tuck on his nipple with his teeth. Ilya would exhale a soft groan. Shane’s hand wanders to his now semi-hard cock that is stored inside his boxer briefs inside a loose pair of joggers. With a soft tuck he encloses his shaft. He pumps two times. Then a third time.
Resting his hand inside his pants he scrolls further down the list of the Canadian Blood Service.
He does not take any prescription medicine.
He did not travel outside Canada, the U.S., Antarctic or Europe within the last three months. Last time he was in Europe was actually at the Sochi Olympics. And Europe apparently doesn’t disqualify you from donating blood somehow. And due to his schedule he barely did any major vacation trips. He had been to Mexico but that was also some years ago. And who the hell would do vacation in the Antarctic?
He could sit himself into an airplane with the next flight to South America or somewhere in Africa. But probably he would not be back in time for the donation rally. Then it would be easier to just skip the event completely and have a nice day in Mexico City, Buenos Aires, Capetown or Kairo. Nahh, that would be a big hassle and fuck up his sleep schedule.
He also has no infectious disease. He gets regular testing. And all his results were negative last time. He also scheduled his next vaccination appointment a few weeks ago.
He does not drink alcohol or does other drugs. He could get wasted on the day of the rally. But also: this would fuck up his whole training status. He would feel awful, would have a hangover and would probably fuck up the next game. Not worth it.
He has regular homosexual intercourse with a man. Duh! This is why he is googling this stuff. And yes the last contact was less than three months ago. Who even thinks of these time frames? Why are they so specific? And why target gay men? He hasn’t had changing partners. There is only Ilya. And even if Ilya had changing partners they always used protection. And of course there is the regular testing mandated by the league. Shane bets some of his teammates have riskier behavior than he has. This stupid stigmatization. He throws his head into the couch cushion and groans into his empty apartment.
His phone vibrates with incoming messages.
Lily
Okay! There are thousands of stories!
Lily
I also found some where you are pregnant. And omega?
Lily
Still don’t know what that is. But is hot
Lily
Some stories are written very well
Lily
I can enjoy them!! But very explicit (is tag, had to google it)
Next thing Ilya sends is a picture from Tumblr. It’s marked as NSFW. Shane clicks the warning away. It’s a drawing of him in a very see-through babydoll nightwear thing. Very pregnant, with a hard cock, puffy nipples and lips. In the drawing he has very shimmery glowing skin.
Shane
I’m blocking you
Shane closes the tab and deletes his browser history for today.
Shane
I’m never talking to you again
Lily
Noooooo!!
Lily
I will not talk about omega Shane ever again. Promise
Shane
Okay.
Shane sighs. He switches back to his browser. There are only two other reasons listed why one could not donate blood: low hemoglobin or iron, and a broader list of disabilities. Which Shane both doesn’t have. Next thing he googles: how to lower hemoglobin. The answer to this: donate blood. Haha, funny. Thank you internet. He scrolls back up through the list and checks every point. He lands back on getting a tattoo or piercing. A piercing seems unpractical for hockey. Always taping it and Shane thinks he would look hideous with a facial piercing. There are other piercings but they all seem very unpractical. He’d never imagined getting a tattoo. But why actually not? A lot of people had tattoos. Ilya has a fucking huge one on his chest! Shane makes fun of him, yes but not because it’s a tattoo per se but because of the design choice. He could have something nice, something he could hide underneath his jersey but he would know it is there.
He closes all his tabs and the next thing he googles are tattoo studios with high reviews that do walk-in appointments for tomorrow. Then he falls into a Pinterest rabbit hole for designs.
***
„Hi! What can I do for you today?“, a woman Shane’s age greets him when he enters the studio named Soul Ink. Her gaze swipes to his face and due to recognition her smile widens.
„I want a tattoo and I read you do walk-ins“, Shane answers.
„I guess you’re at the right place“, she says and points at the neon sign above her head that reads „Tattoos“. He chuckles nervously. The woman with shoulder length blonde hair and a cute smile makes a come here motion. „First tattoo? What kind of design did you think about?“, she asks. Shane nods and fishes his phone out of his jeans pocket. He opens a photo folder he created last night. The folder includes over 20 pictures of a design he likes to have combined. He pushes his phone over the counter. A notification by Lily pops up at the top of the screen that only reads „Thank you“. Shane had wished Ilya good luck for his game today. The woman in front of him grins when she see the screen and also reads the message. He is glad that Ilya chose to be civil today. „That is totally doable. Did you already think of the size and the placement?“, she asks while swiping through the pictures. He nods. „Inner biceps and around like four to five inches big?“ His answers sounds more like a question. She bobs her head enthusiastically. „Amazing. Should we keep the style like in your pictures?“
„That would be great. But I only want it in black and gray. I know the color is kind of in the name but I think black/gray suits me better.“ Now that is a more confident answer!
„I think so too. Sit down. I will give you our consent form. Can I bring you something to drink?“, she asks and pushes his phone back to him.
„Do you have ginger ale?“, he asks hopefully.
„Yes. Dan—the owner—just brought a whole pack. You’re lucky. He normally inhales them within a day.“ She ushers him to a comfortable two-seater and hands him a clipboard with sheet of paper.
„I prepare everything. Take your time. I’ll bring you your ginger ale, Shane Hollander“, she says with a wink and disappears shortly in one of the back rooms. With his best hand writing he starts to fill out the form.
Next time the woman comes to the front with a can of ginger ale in hand, Shane asks her name—Kathy. Kathy hands him the can and buzzes back behind the counter, through a door.
Shane starts grinning, probably a bit dopey. But he is really looking forward to this tattoo. The tattoo shop is empty which makes the whole situation way more comfortable. He is glad he chose a studio with only two artists. He is also very fond of the style of tattoos they’re doing here.
***
Shane stares in the mirror at his new tattoo on his flexed bicep. With his forefinger he brushes over the lines that are draped in second skin and he grins like the Cheshire Cat. Getting the tattoo done didn’t hurt too bad. But his google search also included good first tattoo placement and pain scales. Yes, inner biceps is not the least painful position but he also considered how easily he could hide it, how the healing process would be and how playing hockey would affect the aesthetic of the tattoo. So after careful consideration he decided bicep was the right placement.
Kathy had given him a comprehensive list of care steps for the tattoo and had also recommended a cream for when the second skin would come off. He had picked it up from the drug store before coming home.
He snaps a picture of the tattoo and sends it to Ilya with the caption „I found a solution“.
Lily
For me?
Shane
Not really. Can’t you read?
Lily
Looks pretty. I like it
Lily
Will have to have a closer look next time
Shane
Don’t mess it up though
Lily
Would never. I know what a tattoo can mean
***
All of the Voyageurs are wearing team merch or their team jerseys. A big improvised donation center was erected on the parking lot of their home stadium. The place is buzzing and the waiting areas are filling with people as soon as the door opens. Every Voyageur was instructed to help out at a specific place and has designated donation time slot. The PR team is weaving through the crowd and now and then a camera is pointed in Shane’s face. He and Hayden are handing out sugary snacks for after the donation. Jackie is leaning against the counter in front of them, Arthur’s carrier with him stands at Jackie’s feet. Haydens oldest kids are running through the play area that was build in the corner where parents could drop off their kids while donating. The organizational staff had thought of everything.
„You ready to donate blood?“, Hayden ask while arranging candy bars in a basket in front of him. „Nah. Can’t. I’m not allowed. I recently got a tattoo“, Shane answers and wipes the surface with a wet cloth to remove crumbs. Hayden stills in his movement. „Shane Hollander has a tattoo?! Where? What? When?“, he bombards Shane with questions. Jackie snickers. „I can’t really show it to you right now. I’m not going to undress myself here. And as I said: I got it recently.“
„No way!“, Hayden exclaims. „We showered together at the last game. You didn’t have a tattoo then.“ Hayden scrunches his face. He probably tries to remember if there really had been no tattoo. „You didn’t get your dick tattooed though, right? You are definitely not a dick-tattoo-guy!“ Shane opens his mouth in shock.
„Why would you think that? That’s ridiculous.“ Shane’s cheeks and tips of his ears start to burn with heat. „It’s on my bicep.“ Hayden exhales sharply. „Well, I’m glad. I wouldn’t have been able to look you in the eye if you had a dick-tattoo.“ Shane shakes his head in disbelief. „Do you have a shirt under your jersey, Shane?“, Jackie asks.
„Yes, why?“ The jersey fabric was not necessarily made to wear directly on skin considering one would wear it over pads.
„You could show the tattoo by just taking off your jersey. No indecencies needed here“, Jackie argues. That actually makes sense. Shane unties the front laces of his jersey and pulls it over his head. He wears a tight-fitted black t-shirt that strains around his upper arms. He only needs to push up the sleeve a bit to reveal the Western Red Lily tattoo. Hayden and Jackie both gawk at the tattoo. „Oh, Shane! It’s very pretty!“, Jackie awes. Hayden gets closer. „Is it a rose? I thought you and Rose broke up?“, Hayden asks. With a smack Jackies hand lands on Hayden’s back of his head. „It’s a lily, you dumb ass. No wonder I always only get roses if—and that’s a big if—I get flowers from you.“ Hayden rubs the spot where Jackie hit him. „So for Boston Lily then? Didn’t think it was that serious“, Hayden exclaims.
„No“, Shane drags the word longer than necessary. „It’s the state flower of Saskatchewan. You know, my father’s parents are from close to Meadow Lake. I have really fond memories of visiting them as a kid there and there was my first international hockey competition. You know. It’s just a nice kind of keepsake“, Shane explains sheepishly. „And I think it’s pretty“, he adds quietly.
„I love it, Shane“, Jackie reinforces and puts her hand gently on his shoulder.
„Sure. Nice“, Hayden mumbles. „A skull or some hockey stuff would have been nicer.“
„You should gift your wife flowers more often“, Shane advices Hayden and pulls his jersey back on.
„A truth to be told!“, Jackie proclaims.