Work Text:
Lance always sticks to the famous quote ‘be a lover not a fighter’. But sometimes he can’t help but fight back, especially when his so called best friend is talking about his ex that caused him the messiest break down ever known to man. Their breakup ended on worse terms than Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston (it definitely wasn’t but Lance likes the dramatic effect it brings). Lance still beats himself up over how it happened.
“I just don’t understand why you had to tell me this now!” Lances eyes were glossed over as he huffs out a sigh. “We had everything planned and- and you’re throwing it away because of Alaska? You’re throwing me away?”
“I never said that. It’s just, I have more opportunities- people want me there!”
“Well I want you here!”
“You can’t decide what I do Lance. I’ve let people decide for me my whole life and I’m not giving up this chance just because you’re scared! I want something better for my life than being stuck in the same city I’ve been in for 18 years!”
He’s angry. Really angry. Lance wasn’t thinking straight. He couldn’t stop himself from blurting out the words they both dreaded the most. Their relationship wasn’t perfect. But it was full of love and memories. Full of hard work to get to the point where they are now. And god does Lance feel guilty. He’s never wanted to take back words so fast, but the deed was done. Seeing that face he fell in love with all those years ago fall into something more than pain was horrifying. The way his eyes slowly dropped to his feet before grabbing his jacket. Lance wanted to reach out, beg him to stay, to hold him, kiss him, apologise for even daring to think of it. But he was frozen.
He could hear his family in the lounge room asking his boyfriend, or ex boyfriend, ‘why the rush?’ And ‘weren’t you staying for dinner?’. It only broke Lances heart more. He finally allowed himself to cry while sinking into his bed. The pain he was feeling was like nothing he’s ever felt before. Lance could hear his car start outside and disappear, and all he wished for was to see the car lights shine through his curtains showing that he came back for him. Lance would run out and jump into his arms again and they would apologise between kisses and hug each other until their arms felt weak. But they never did.
“All I’m saying is that he looks better! For a few months he looked miserable, and more than usual. And an added bonus is that he’s still pretty. I’m surprised he can still pull off the angsty emo boy look-“
“Pidge for the love of everything robotic, can you please shut the fuck up? I really don’t want to talk about anyone I’ve dated. Especially him!”
Pidge shoves his legs off the couch to sit next to him, smiling down at his phone that is obviously sporting a photo of the man who will not be named.
That’s right. Lances phone. Lance likes to stalk people once in a while. Sue him! But that was when his ex wasn’t active on Instagram and still had up photos of his younger grouchy self that Lance once knew and adored. And of course he never cleared his search history. No one does.
“Cmon Lance! At least look at the photo, please? It will be good for you. Kinda like a healing thing.” Hunk huffs when Lance flicks him across the ear.
“Guys it’s pointless. I’m not going to magically heal by seeing what he looks like now, so forget it. I’m not looking at any phot- hey!” Lance missed the side eyed glances between Pidge and Hunk because suddenly he’s being pinned to the couch with Hunk keeping a hold of his legs and Pidge sitting atop his chest. “What the hell?! Are you guys insane! You should be grateful I don’t have asthma or else I’d be dead with how much pressure is on my person right now!”
Lance was always the dramatic type. That’s what made his friends pin him to the couch in the first place. Of course it was Pidges idea (she will do anything to show Lance she is stronger than him) and it was obvious with how she’s proudly smirking down at Lance, phone still in hand. “Laaanccceeee look at the photo Lance! I know you want toooo!” She giggles while shoving the phone right into Lances face. But being the stubborn man he’s grown to be he wired his eyes shut and flung his arms around, in a desperate attempt to get free. But of course, Lances life had to get worse.
Due to the constant flinging and Pidge waving around his phone, it was bound to happen. Lance didn’t realise it yet but Pidge and Hunk definitely did. All Lance heard was a quick gasp and a small ‘oh my god’ before he peaked one eye open to see what got his friends sudden interest. All he could see was their horrified expressions staring at the phone. “What? What’s happened?” Pidge and hunk look at each other before turning the phone to Lance, and holy fucking shit.
All he could see was the most majestic and beautiful person he’s ever laid his eyes on. He feels his heart skip a beat seeing those unique features for the first time in 9 months. He has the widest smile in the photo, obviously taken from someone else, while crouching down with a dog- wolf? A dogwolf. Lance has never seen him with a dog before. It makes the blood rush to his ears. He hasn’t felt this way for so long. But then he notices the reason for the horror.
Lance had liked the photo. Lance had liked a photo of his ex. A photo on his exes Instagram account. His ex of almost 10 months.
“Oh my god no. No. No no no no. You’re kidding. What the fuck!!” To say Lance is stressing is a huge understatement. He’s basically ripping the hair out of head while Pidge and Hunk apologise profusely.
“Maybe he won’t notice?” Hunk squeaks out, shrugging his shoulders in a way that should be comforting. But Lance knows he will notice. There’s no way he wouldn’t. All he can do is groan and smash a pillow into his face.
“That’s it. I have to delete Instagram. Goodbye skin care tips, goodbye funny memes late at night, goodbye charcuterie boards!”
“Nuh uh! You aren’t deleting your Instagram, I forbid it. And I’m sure that Kei-“
“Don’t even say his name!”
Pidge, unamused by being cut off, continues “I’m sure that he won’t even notice. He was never a big technology guy”
“Yeah! and besides, he’s like a whole country away! I highly doubt he would cross all of Canada just to confront you on liking his Instagram post.”
Lance hates when pidge and Hunk are right. So of course he keeps up his moody demeanour by groaning into the pillow once again.
———
A few hours later Lance is still cringing at the fact he liked the post. It’s looming over him no matter what he does or where he goes. Just before Lance was taking a much needed shower when the memory popped up. Not only did he feel embarrassed all over again but he also got a raging hard on from picturing his ex while he was naked. His shower turned cold after that incident.
“Hey man, you feeling better?” Hunk is definitely the most caring out of the trio. Every few minutes he will ask Lance how he’s holding up knowing he will get the same answer each time, ‘i guess.’
“Cmon buddy don’t look at me like that! … Hey, if you wanna pull out on going to that party tonight I’d be more than happy to stay here with you and eat spicy Cheeto puffs.”
Right. The New Year’s party. In about 6 hours Lance can say he hasn’t liked his exes Instagram post since last year.
“Dude you’ve been raving about going to that party for weeks. I don’t want to stop you from having fun just because of my mid life crisis. I’m fine wallowing in my own self pity alone.” Lance hears Pidge scoff and walk over to him. He’s currently lying on his bed with his head off the edge so he can’t take her seriously when she’s upside down.
“Ok first of all you’re 19. Not even close to middle age. And second I’m not letting you wriggle your way out of going to that party.”
“I’m not wriggling. I’m army crawling. There’s a big difference pigeon.”
“Lance if I don’t see you ready by 7:30PM sharp you will be sorry. I know where you sleep!” Pidge is scary when she had her mind set on something. Last time Lance pulled a stunt like this he woke up covered in freezing cold water with Pidge hovering over him holding the biggest bucket ever made.
Lance doesn’t even understand the importance of this party anyways. All it’s gonna be is a bunch of people they don’t like smooshed into a frat boy house while getting drunk and then making out at midnight. Not really Pidges thing. Lance glances over at Hunk and all he gets back is a shrug.
So, with a lot of whining and complaining on Lances end, he gets ready for the party. He’s landed on his go-to party fit. A plain white button up with a denim jacket thrown over it, his ‘lucky khakis’ that got him through almost all his high school dances, and over-worn Vans. Much to his mothers annoyance, Lance has refused to buy new shoes. ‘They’re brand new! Not only do they have no character but they look weird!’ So he’s been repping his one pair of shoes for as long as he can remember.
———
The party was just as Lance expected. A stuffy frat house with people sticking their tongues down each other’s throat left and right. It was overwhelming to say the least, and Lance doesn’t even remember when parties stop being his source of light in life. He used to thrive on partying when he was in high school but for a few months he’s found them boring. Instead of doing body shots off random people and dancing on top of the kitchen counter to music that’s so loud he can’t hear his own thoughts, Lance now stands in a secluded corner waiting for the night to end.
He lost Pidge and Hunk after a few minutes when they found friends from their tech class to nerd out with. He scans the room in an attempt to find a familiar face, but all he’s met with is strangers. That was until he noticed a very recognisable head of hair. It looked just like his exes mullet. Lance’s eyes widen, but he convinces himself it’s just a coincidence. Anyone could have a mullet. But the closer Lance looks the more similarities he uncovers, like the red leather jacket he’s wearing with a very specific black and white star on his left sleeve. And his jeans that are overly baggy and has slight rips from where the heels of his converse get caught.
‘Please don’t turn around’ is all Lance could think about. Surely this was just a coincidence, anyone could have that outfit. Lances heart was beating faster the more he kept thinking about it, and it only got worse when the not-so-Doppelgänger does turn around. And makes exact eye contact with Lance. Lance felt his heart drop to his stomach. Because the fuck was Keith doing here? Why isn’t he in Alaska anymore? He saw Keith’s eyes widen at the sight of him, and his jaw practically hit the floor. They stood frozen analysing each other for a solid 3 minutes taking each others presence. Lance felt his face heat up when he saw Keith’s eyes drag down his body, and suddenly he becomes self conscious of his outfit choice.
He can’t take it anymore. He needs to get out. But with being separated from Pidge and Hunk he has no one to drive him home, and he isn’t about to walk 30 minutes just to get to his apartment. So when he hears the flush of a toilet and a door to his left open he wastes no time to rush into the bathroom. His mind was racing with thousands of thoughts, and when he looks up at the mirror in front of him he just now realises that he’s crying. How fucking embarrassing. He jolts from the sink when he hears knocking on the door.
“Lance? Is that you? I- Listen I get that this is weird but I just, I want to talk to you. I need to talk to you.”
Hearing his voice again after so long is like a wave of nostalgia. He’s still as soft spoken as ever but his voice sounds deeper. Lance doesn’t know what to do. Why is Keith even here? It doesn’t make any sense.
“Please Lance … please let me in.”
Lance doesn’t know why. He doesn’t even try to stop himself. But he slowly unlocks the door, and is face to face with Keith. Keiths eyes were always Lances favourite part of him. The way it’s a blend of purple and grey was always fascinating to him. He remembers all those late nights of lying together, staring at each other, and Lance would lean over and whisper how much he loves him before placing delicate kisses along the bridge of his nose and eyelids. But they haven’t been that close in a long time. And Lance needs to resist the urge to pull Keith in and kiss his face all over again to make up for missed time. So instead he just looks at the floor and moves to the side, letting Keith into the bathroom, before closing the door again.
“Um, so I know this is weird and I know you broke up with me but I just-“
“Why are you here Keith.”
“Well I’ve been meaning to tell you this for a while now. I was just … I didn’t know how to say it.”
“Say what?”
“Lance … I never went to Alaska. I never left.”
Lance forced his eyes to meet Keith’s again, and he must not of hid his confusion because Keith continues.
“After that night, I just couldn’t bring myself to leave knowing how upset you were. Because even if I did I would have been miserable because I didn’t have you.”
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“I thought you hated me Lance. You were angry at me for wanting to go and I thought you wouldn’t care to hear me out, but I was talking to Pidge a few days ago-“
“Wow wait what? You talked to Pidge? My Pidge?”
“… yeah. And she said I needed to tell you, but I didnt know how. So she told me you would be at this party”
That bitch. That’s why she wanted Lance to go to this party. Because Keith would be there. That’s also why she’s been talking about Keith so much more lately, and why she didn’t stop making fun of him for having Keith’s Instagram handle in his recently searched. Lance groans. He needs to sit down. Lance crawls into the bathtub and rests his head on his knees. So much has happened in such a short amount of time, he’s so overwhelmed. He can hear Keith shuffling on the outside of the bathtub. This whole situation is just awkward for the both of them, and the fact Lance has now found out that Keith never left makes this situation even worse.
After a beat of silence, Keith jumps into the bathtub with Lance. The toes of their shoes are barely touching, and with how both boys have long and lanky legs it feels more crammed than it actually is.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”
“No. You don’t need to apologise Keith. This whole situation would have never happened if I was just supportive of what you wanted to do. I was just scared that you would find better things there, and I wouldn’t be important to you anymore-“
“Lance…”
“-so I let my insecurities take over and I hurt you, I ruined all your opportunities because I was being selfish. I’m so sorry Keith. For everything. For- for not being there for you, and for breaking up with you, and being a bad boyfriend.”
Lance was openly crying now, admitting to your faults is never easy. But admitting to your faults to your ex boyfriend who you’re still in love with is even worse. Keith places a hand on Lances knee.
“Lance we both messed up. You had so much pressure on your shoulders to get into the piloting program and instead of being there for you I started dumping all of my own problems on you. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time so I could be better for you, because I regret so much. And you deserve so much more than what I gave you. Lance you’re the greatest guy I’ve ever met, and the fact I didn’t fight for our relationship like I should have makes me a shitty person. You did nothing wrong.”
“Breaking up with you is what I did wrong. I wish I never broke up with you …”
They’re consumed by silence again, until they hear the party that was long forgotten start counting down until the new year starts. Keith shifts forward slightly, his hand that was on Lances knee is now resting on the edge of the bathtub.
‘20’
“I wish I didn’t walk away when you did.”
Lance can’t ignore the way Keith is looking at him. He’s looking at him the same way he used to, when they were innocent to the harsh reality of relationships.
‘17’
“I wouldn’t have stopped you from coming back Keith.”
Keith’s legs slowly slip between Lances, it feels so different to the other times. It feels like if they make any vast movements one of them will break.
‘14’
“Would you … stop me if I kissed you again?”
Lances heart beat started up, because oh god all he wants to do is Keith kiss again and again until he can’t breathe. Until his lips are all sore and chapped. He’s been craving Keith’s lips for so long and he hasn’t even fully recognised it.
‘10’
“Do you want me to stop you?”
‘9’
“God no.”
‘8’
They lean in closer each passing second.
‘7’
Lance looks down at Keith’s lips, and he can’t help the shiver that he feels up his spine when Keith licks his bottom lip.
‘6’
Keith is now basically straddling Lance, trying to get as close as possible to the boy he never fell out of love with.
‘5’
Lance can feel Keith’s eyelashes twitch against his cheek.
‘4’
Lances hands finds Keith’s waist like they belong there, and Keith slowly snakes his right hand to rest against Lances jawline while his life hand runs through his hair.
‘3’
That was really happening. Lance hasn’t kissed anyone since his breakup with Keith. And now he’s about to kiss Keith. He isn’t at all prepared for this moment, but maybe that’s what makes it so intimate. Even after all their time away from each other their body still fits like a perfect puzzle piece. It feels so natural to be with Keith.
‘2’
Keith’s eyes flutter shut as he braces himself.
‘1’
The kiss wasn’t the best. It was a bit messy, and Lances heavy breathing made it harder to keep up with Keith’s fast pace. But it felt right. It felt normal. It’s like all those months away from each other never happened, and it was just a bad dream. When they pulled apart Lance unconsciously followed Keith’s lips, as a desperate attempt to get back the attention he’s been craving. Keith can’t help but smirk down at Lance.
“By the way, did you mean to like my Instagram post?”
“Fuck I was hoping you wouldn’t see that … it’s just- someone told me you’re still pretty and I couldn’t help but agree” (nice save Lance). And what a save it was, because Lance was greeted with another much needed kiss. This is exactly where Lance wants to be. In Keith’s life.
The end!!