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Max had been warming up to the situation, to put it nicely. He did originally intend to travel solo, and pocket quest rewards for himself with no splitting necessary, but he had to admit this had its perks too. It was easier to rotate the night guards and keep an eye on their things, and having someone who was willing to do the manual labor for him was convenient. And, although it would still take him a while to come to terms with this one, it was also nice to have company. Broghini was a good drinking buddy, and Ruby’s sense of humor mixed with his really well.
But he couldn’t say the same about Mr. Wizard.
Max had never ever met someone as irritating as him. And he literally grew up in a circus. He knew many people who were irritating for a living, and yet none of them came close to whatever that guy was doing.
It was something about the way he carried himself, maybe. He walked as if some external force was pulling his strings, waving his arms around in the air in a bouncy manner. He wasn’t all that different from a twig bending in the wind, tall and lanky as he was. It felt like there wasn’t a single thing that man did in a normal way. His voice for one had a ridiculous accent that was in no way organic. Max had traveled through many faraway lands with his circus and he had yet come across anyone else who spoke in a remotely similar tone. He was certain even his laughter was practiced. Each and every noise he made seemed to be hand-crafted to be as annoying as possible.
That was without getting into his never-ending stories. They had to be made up. Mr. Wizard couldn’t be that much older than Max himself, despite his dumb old man persona (the fake beard was not fooling anyone, much less Max). It was impossible for Mr. Wizard to have been not only a minister of transport, but also a royal advisor, a magic crab trainer, a licensed hoverboard driver, and so on, while still being an admittedly successful traveling salesman. The most believable lie was that he had allegedly graduated from the prestigious Crystal Cliffs Academy, and that alone must have taken him years. Though, the Academy was strict, from what Max had heard, and they kept a close eye on what their alumni were doing. He doubted they would approve of half the things Mr. Wizard did. Maybe he was lying to them as well.
All in all, Mr. Wizard had an unexplainable quality to him (or maybe a million of them) that made Max’s blood boil.
Perhaps, he considered, if he had to narrow it down to one single thing, it would be the fact that he didn’t break character. Even the most practiced of clowns had times where they washed off their make-up, erased the smiles off their faces, and relaxed. Those were moments reserved for outside the stage, for quiet nights. But not even in the quietest of nights, when they were all sleeping together under the most gorgeous twinkling sky did Mr. Wizard ever take off his mask. The stupid beard was always on, the dumb “Ho-ho!” chuckles remained and he wouln’t shut up. And Max was absolutely done with it. Mr. Wizard was a carefully constructed lie, and Max wanted to catch him off guard. Make him sound more like a person and less like a caricature.
His efforts, however, were not finding much success. Max first tried to make him angry, as he was a bit of a pro at annoying people as well, but he soon realized he’d have to change strategies. Not even the worst-timed bagpipes could bother him, and Ruby seemed one note away from gutting Max like a fish. So, that plan was a no. Drinking competitions didn’t work either, as even while drunk Mr. Wizard managed to maintain that odd composure of his and Max didn’t have the money to keep the drinks rolling for long enough to get him to waver. In the end, Mr. Wizard had treated him to a few of the drinks and although Max loved being treated to things, it felt like it was a bit counterproductive. And that didn’t leave Max with many more options.
He kicked a pebble as he reconsidered his own skills. Could Mr. Wizard backflip? Max would assume no, with all those long robes and long limbs, but Brodude hit a perfect one with no warmup so Max had learned to not judge appearances. Though Mr. Wizard probably wasn’t enough of a sore loser to get mad about it, and he seemed to enjoy even Max’s failed backflips, so no matter the outcome, he’d be having fun. Another strategy to cross off, then.
“Penny for your thoughts, Max? You look like something’s bothering you,” Broghini asked, with a good-natured smile as always.
Max glanced towards Mr. Wizard. Their eyes met, and Mr. Wizard waved at him. Max looked away.
“Nothing. I’m just sooooo bored!” Max whined and threw his hands up in the air. “Weren't we supposed to be at the next town already? This is ridiculous!”
“Be quiet,” Ruby hissed, but he ignored her, as usual. “ The rocks in this side of the mountain are unstable. It might be prone to landslides.”
They had been going down this path for way longer than they’d originally estimated. Their destination was down in the valley, and although it was nice to not be walking down an unmanageably steep road for once, the fact that this one was fairly even meant that it was so much longer than necessary. And Max was tired.
“Well, if you're so bored,” Mr. Wizard chimed in, unfortunately. “I have the thing just for you!” There it came, the salesman spiel.
“I am not going to buy your wares, Gabriel,” Max groaned, walking faster.
However, Mr. Wizard’s legs were much, much longer than his.
“Oh, but Mr. Blunder!” the wizard insisted. At least he was finally beginning to get his name right. “You simply must try out this one!”
Max quickened his pace even more.
“How many times do I have to tell you that-”
The ground under Max’s feet gave out and he plummeted down the mountain.
As he fell to a certain death, oddly enough, the only worry on his mind was whether his bagpipes would survive the fall. Mr. Wizard would surely like to keep them.
Then, his back hit a smooth surface, much sooner than he'd thought, much gentler than he'd thought. Max slowly opened his eyes, not knowing when he had shut them.
A few meters above him was Mr. Wizard, with his hand outstretched towards the void. His face wore an expression that Max had never seen him don before. His brow was furrowed and tense, and his teeth were bared, gritted together in a show of effort and genuine worry. When his gaze met Max’s, he smiled, strained yet relieved. Max could only stare at him, amazed, with the kind of awe usually reserved for true marvels of nature.
The hoverboard Mr. Wizard had conjured started rising higher, slowly lifting Max back up to their level.
“That is one dangerous shortcut, Max!” Broghini sighed in relief. “Be more careful next time!”
“I literally just told you this would happen.” Ruby rolled her eyes.
Mr. Wizard extended Max a hand to help him get up. He was back to his usual dopey smile, face half-obscured by the beard. Max took his hand regardless.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he muttered, still a bit dazed from the shock. “I’ll be more careful.”
As he stepped off the platform, his legs nearly gave out, and he stumbled towards the ground again. A thin arm snaked around his waist and caught him just in time. Mr. Wizard pulled Max closer to his chest.
“Hoho!” He chuckled in that absurd way of his. “You’re not really following up on those words!”
Max frowned, and turned to face him, ready to curse him out. He was, however, taken aback by the sudden proximity to the wizard’s face. How had Max never noticed that his eyes were this green? Covered by the brim of his hat, the fake beard and the glowing scar, Max had to wonder if there was a handsome face underneath.
Absolutely not. What was he even thinking about. Oh, goodness. That near death experience was affecting him more than he’d thought.
He pushed Mr. Wizard away.
“Do not touch me.” This message would have been more effective if it were accompanied by a glare, but Max found he couldn’t stand to look at the wizard again.
“But how will I save you of the perils then?” He could hear the grin in Mr. Wizard’s proud voice.
“I don’t need any saving!” Max yelled, once again storming off to walk way ahead of everyone. Except, this time, he was a little bit more careful.
They at last arrived to the town by nightfall, and Max was so ready to finally sleep on an actual bed. The interaction from earlier that day was still troubling him, so he was looking forward to sleeping it off. What he was not so looking forward to, as he lost their rock-paper-scissors matches, was to sharing a room with Mr. Wizard.
It could be worse, he tried to convince himself as he stared at the tavern ceiling. It could be worse. At least Mr. Wizard doesn’t snore. And he sleeps fully clothed. It could be worse.
It could be worse, because as Max started getting drowsy with exhaustion, as the room lights were turned off with only a small candle illuminating them, he felt his tongue become heavier and his thoughts clouded and, against his better judgment, he started a conversation himself. He’d blame it on the tiredness in the morning, but right then, he had something he wanted to tell Mr. Wizard.
“Thank you for saving me earlier,” he said, his voice too loud in the small room. He knew Mr. Wizard was still awake, though. “In the cliff.”
Mr. Wizard chuckled, and it sounded… normal. Max’s head snapped towards him, not even worried about staring. He needed to watch Mr. Wizard’s expression.
“Well, I wouldn’t want your pretty face to get scratched, Max!” he laughed, in a most normal tone, his eyes twinkling with amusement. His voice was much lower than Max expected, and the use of his first name made his stomach flutter weirdly. “Good night, my sweet angel.”
Mr. Wizard blew out the candle and the moment was over as soon as it started.
Max was left staring into the nothingness, mouth agape. His heart was beating a million miles an hour, so loud he feared it might be heard in the small room. He was sure his face had turned fully red, bright in the darkness. He hoped the tiny rays of moonlight that seeped in through the window shutters would stay quiet and guard this secret for him. Whatever this secret was. Max refused to believe such a brief interaction had had this big of an effect on him. Mr. Wizard had not, in any way, gotten the better of him.
He must be getting sick.