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Matt wasn’t in the habit of asking stupid questions.
First and foremost because he usually understood things pretty quickly – otherwise Mello would have long grown tired of him like he did with the other kids who couldn’t keep up – and secondly because Mello usually explained his thought process out loud in order to show off, which meant there wasn’t really any need for Matt to ask questions even if he didn’t understand right away.
This time however, he found himself asking Mello something that, in hindsight, might be considered somewhat stupid, or at least silly.
They’d been searching for a number of books in the Wammy’s library, the pile in Matt’s hands growing bigger and bigger as Mello picked out whatever he needed, when a small selection of outdated magazines had caught his eye and given him the idea.
‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ he absentmindedly asked Mello, all the while observing the cover of one of the magazines promising the reader a quiz for determining the ideal job, 99% accuracy guaranteed.
(Wammy’s House was apparently not the only institution obsessed with percentages).
Before Matt’s brain got the chance to catch up with his mouth however, Mello abruptly whipped around and looked at him like he’d lost his mind.
When he didn’t say anything for a while, Matt put down the small mountain of books he was holding so they could talk properly, even if it was really tempting to just hide behind them.
‘I’m going to be the next L, obviously.’ Mello pointed out, speaking slowly while his tone was just the slightest bit condescending, as if he’d expected Matt to know this by now.
Matt did know, but that didn’t necessarily mean Mello had always dreamt of becoming the next L. There had been a time before Wammy’s. A life before the pressure to become the best. Matt was curious to know if Mello had ever thought of being something else.
‘Yeah, but what did you want to be before that?’ Matt tried again. ‘Have you never considered other options?’
Matt didn’t like the expression that appeared on Mello’s face at those words, unhappy and displeased and frustrated in all the wrong ways. Which was saying something, because observing Mello’s many expressions was probably in his top three of favourite things to do.
(Top three in no particular order, it should be noted, because he didn’t think Mello would forgive him if he placed him in anything but first place for anything).
‘I never had to.’ Mello’s voice snapped him from his thoughts.
‘But if you could choose?’ Matt replied. ‘If you could be anything?’
In Matt’s eyes, Mello truly could be anything. He was determined like that.
Whether Mello agreed with that sentiment was an entirely different matter.
‘I don’t know.’ Mello huffed. He then eyed the stack of books on the floor as if he was considering knocking it over, and Matt took a careful step sideways to step in front of it and block him if he tried. ‘A private detective, maybe.’
Still a little too L-esque for Matt’s liking, but at least they were making progress. It was a start.
‘A private detective, hm…?’ Matt wondered out loud, thinking of ways to get a rise out of his friend. ‘So you can find the missing lapdogs of old ladies day in day out?’
Mello’s eyes narrowed, and he crossed his arms in an annoyed manner while he considered those words.
Matt got the feeling he’d romanticised the life of a private detective in his mind because of L and his intricate cases, but reality would likely turn out a little different. Unless someone had a certain reputation already, cases would probably not be that interesting most of the time.
‘Well joining the police force isn’t an option.’ Mello said, finally thinking it over a little more.
‘Not with your authority issues, no.’ Matt agreed.
‘It’s not my authority issues that are the problem.’ Mello huffed. ‘It’s authority that has issues with me.’
‘In which case the point still stands.’
Mello clearly didn’t like that answer, though he also didn’t seem to have any good counterarguments either. He leaned against one of the bookcases with a frown, the expression a result of being in deep thought and being annoyed at the same time, and didn’t move from that position for several seconds.
‘If you’re so clever, what would you want to be then?’ he finally asked after a while.
Matt slouched against the back of the sofa behind him both to mirror Mello’s pose, and because he felt like it. Mello had told him on more than one occasion he was going to fuck up his back, but he wasn’t in a position to talk with all the slouching he himself did.
‘Well, unlike you, I have no intention of becoming the next L.’ Matt told him truthfully. ‘So I’ve had to seriously consider what I want to do with my life after this, you know?’
‘You’re going to be my assistant, obviously.’ Mello deadpanned, as if it should have been obvious. As if it was a given.
‘Right, and serve you chocolate all day?’ Matt huffed. ‘No thanks. If I’m not careful you’ll make me wear a maid outfit or something too.’
‘You’re giving me ideas.’ Mello replied, the hint of a smile playing around his lips.
This expression was a million times better than the frustrated one from before, although it did make Matt wonder why it was his own dignity that needed to be sacrificed to achieve it.
‘Anyway.’ he said, ignoring the slight flush on his cheeks and hoping Mello would do the same. ‘I’ve thought about racing cars, maybe.’
‘That’s way too dangerous.’ Mello shot back almost immediately, the smile from before vanishing into thin air. ‘You could get yourself killed.’
‘Who are you, my mom?’ Matt said with a roll of his eyes. Though when Mello glared at him, he decided to be a bit more merciful with his words. ‘Okay, okay. Thanks for being worried about me I guess. It’s not like that was going to happen anyway.’
‘No, I would have sabotaged your car to prevent you from going out there.’
‘Wow, you really care a lot, don’t you?’
‘Shut up!’
Mello then pushed himself away from the bookshelves, walked past Matt towards the sofa, and plopped himself down unceremoniously. One might have thought this was his way of declaring the conversation over, but he left enough free space next to him to allow Matt to sit down as well, which was about as clear an invitation as any.
Matt didn’t need to be told twice, and sat down in a way that allowed him to lean against Mello’s side. A bold move considering he was taking more than Mello had offered, but Mello allowed it and didn’t move to push him away, so Matt considered it a win.
‘Is professional gamer a thing?’ Matt was the first to break the silence once more.
‘No.’
‘It is, actually.’ Matt corrected him. ‘But I’d have to go out to attend events and interact with people, which is…well. Yuck. I prefer the comfort of my own bed. Or couch. I’m not picky.’
‘You truly like to keep your options open, don’t you?’ Mello said sarcastically.
‘You know me.’ Matt replied equally sarcastically, before turning semi-serious once more. ‘Honestly though, I’ll probably just end up as the IT guy at some backwater company. The one who tells people to try turning their computers off and on again and that fixes the problem like eighty percent of the time.’
At this, Mello snorted.
‘That sounds so lame and boring though.’
‘That’s me, lame and boring.’ Matt sighed, while pressing his cheek against Mello’s shoulder a little more. It wasn’t like there were currently any other kids in the library to disturb them anyway. ‘I like things that way.’
‘Uh, no you don’t.’ Mello argued. ‘You’re friends with me.’
Matt couldn’t stop a small grin from making its way onto his face.
‘Precisely, being friends with you is thrill enough for me.’
He could practically feel Mello rolling his eyes again at those words, even without looking, but he still sank down a little further on the couch to get comfortable, so clearly he didn’t think the answer was that stupid after all.
‘Well unlike you, I’d actually want to do something interesting.’ he said. ‘Maybe one of those reporters who go to disaster sites to let the world know what’s going on, even if they’re risking their own life to do so.’
‘And you said my racing idea was dangerous?’ Matt huffed.
‘Okay, an actor then.’
‘You know what, I could actually see that.’
Really?’ Mello asked, raising an eyebrow at him.
‘Yeah, but you’d also probably end up punching every one of your co-stars for being an ass, so your career wouldn’t last very long…’
Instead of looking frustrated at thinking about a future they’d never have, Mello finally seemed to be getting into this little game of theirs. If anything, he now looked like he was kind of enjoying it. Even if all of it was just hypothetical, thinking about all the things they might want to do was entertaining at least.
‘Who knows, maybe I’ll just end up working at some backwater company where I have to ask the cute IT guy to help me fix my computer every week.’ he said, leaning his head on top of Matt’s own in a rare show of affection.
The grin Matt had been sporting turned into a fully-fledged smile as he imagined that scenario.
‘You could ask me to fix your computer for you as often as you’d want.’ he said. ‘Careful though, I might take advantage of the opportunity and purposely cause some bugs so you’ll have to come in again.’
If Matt wasn’t mistaken, Mello couldn’t stop himself from smiling anymore either.
‘I think any career would be fine as long as you’d be there with me.’ Mello told him.
‘Yeah.’ Matt brought out. ‘Yeah, I think so too.’
Matt didn’t know what the future had in store for them, or what they’d end up doing with their lives, but perhaps that wasn’t such a bad thing.
So long as he had Mello by his side, he’d be happy doing just about anything.