Chapter Text
February 2nd, 2011.
Naoto Shirogane; hailed as a Wunderkind; leading the three classes of the Yasogami first year as highest-scoring; the protégée of the esteemed Shirogane the Elder, the third in the line of the Shirogane; the Detective Prince; the one called in to assist in the investigation of cases, which had professional police officers stumped. That Naoto Shirogane.
This same Naoto Shirogane, who sat in her apartment now. Expression blank, highlighting pen forgotten between her slack fingers, staring off into the distance. All because she spotted a tiny comic of a bunny face scribbled in the margin of her notes. Just a tiny cartoon bunny face, really, along with the speech bubble saying ‘Thanks for your help’. Kanji Tatsumi had drawn in there, only two weeks ago. They had studied together at Junes and Naoto had found an easier way for him to remember the dates of a crucial war during the Kyoto era. She had drawn it into the margins of his books; and he snuck her book and drew the bunny in there.
She had not intended to think on this. She really, really had not. She had only wanted to review her notes for the upcoming tests, as another gruelling week of back-to-back exams was before her. She had only wanted to confirm to herself what she already knew, cemented as facts, ready to reproduce to score points in an oddly arbitrary system of question-and-answer. She knew that little of this would be retained for longer periods of time. And she knew these tests would not assist her in her chosen profession. But she would get the good grades needed to show her worth.
That is, she told herself, looking back at the bunny, if I manage to banish Kanji Tatsumi from my mind for just a few more days.
She had reluctantly agreed to Rise talking her into the Ski trip with the others. It was, after all, possibly the last chance to spend time with Yu-senpai. But not only did she not know the first thing about skiing, she had pretty much already been wrapped up like a present and handed to Kanji-kun by Rise-san. The moment she admitted to not being able to or know how to ski; the moment Kanji said it was easy and he could teach her, that was when her doom had been spelled out to her in point 80 font.
Not because she feared making an utter fool of herself, though that was a factor.
Also not because she feared the endless teasing from Rise-san or their senpai, although that, too, was likely to happen.
And absolutely not because she did not wish to spend time with her newfound friends, even though the stay at the hot springs should have scared her away from socialising forever.
No, all of these fairly small reasons were not the issue here.
She snapped back to her living room, tsk’ed, and pushed the cap back onto her marker, snapping it shut. No work was getting down tonight, she might as well just go, shower, fix herself some tea and maybe unwind with a good book. Maybe even allow herself some of the… well… some of the experiments in chocolate she had created. Not that she would ever gift chocolate. Not directly. Not if she could…
This was not going anywhere.
Naoto got up, walked into the tiny bathroom in her Inaba apartment and started to strip off her clothing. Putting everything into the laundry basket to wash later, Naoto turned on the western-style shower before stepping in. She allowed steam to build up as she turned to the sink to brush her teeth. She rubbed her hand through her hair while she brushed, trying to recall some of the previously reviewed facts.
She even managed to stay in that subject while she enjoyed the hot shower, feeling some tension being pulled from her with the hot cascade down her back.
As she started to towel herself off, however...
As she wrapped herself in her towel, for a few fleeting moments she missed the soft, warmed towel the Amagi Inn provided to gusts at the hot springs. And somehow from there, her mind went straight to the boys walking in on them. And to Kanji Tatsumi freezing as he noticed them. As such as she was in shock and upset at the time, she could not help watching the boy. He… well. He is really rather fit. For a boy his age he is extremely well built. And it was not just his physical traits she noticed. He seemed shy, looking away from the girls, keeping his gaze between the floor and sliding towards her.
She sighed and pulled on her pyjamas.
The tea was made swiftly, she even lit a candle, unscented of course, just for the ambience, you see… though her thoughts remained stuck on Kanji Tatsumi.
The worst had possibly been Rise a few days ago. When she had caught Naoto observing Kanji during the lunch break that day, she had teased her and Naoto may have inadvertently admitted that she finds herself spending a frustratingly large amount of time observing the boy and grotesquely frequent, at that. In doing so, she had triggered the idol into squeeing in delight and dragging her away from the others.
She grunted as she drank deeply from her tea, remembering the conversation.
“Oh-my-GOD! Have you told Kanji-kun?!”
“Told him what, Rise-.san?”
“About your crush! He would absolutely DIE if you told him!”
“Wh-WHAT?! I-I-I have no… this is not what you think! Not at all! I do not … do not harbour any feelings for him one way or the other!”
“U-huh, suuuure you don’t! Silly Naoto, just tell him! Trust me, he’s been waiting to hear that! You simply have no idea how much he wants you to like him, because-“
And there they were interrupted. Why Kanji Tatsumi would believe her expressing an interest in him would be regarded so positively, she could not understand.
No, that, too, was false.
She absolutely understood.
The boy was taken with her. It had taken some time to put the pieces together, but how he behaved around her in the last three months made his …. his… well, his interest stand out.
She tucked her legs up and tried to curl into a tiny ball.
This still was not entirely the problem.
The problem was… she found herself on a very dangerous brink. A brink of attraction to him. The wrong move and her long-held belief that romantic entanglements were a waste of time might get overthrown. The unknown stood before her, and it was as if Kanji Tatsumi already had stepped forward, holding his hand out to her.
Naoto put her cup down and leaned her head on her knees, wrapping both of her arms around her knees and head, trying to shut away the outside world.
“No. No, I cannot fall … f-fall in love,” she said out loud, if only to hear the words spoken so they would become a reality. “I have no time and no interest and no desire to find myself falling in love with anyone. And least of them all with … with …” Her hands hugged herself tighter. “Kanji-kun.”