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La Chute du Roi

Summary:

Affogato and his little henchgirl Tiramisu working out their plan
Background info you NEED TO KNOW!!!!:
Headcanons: Affogato's bedroom is filled with merchandise of Cream Unicorn from their festival (which is an inside joke but I needed to include it), this is based on a role play with my best friend and references other role plays, Tiramisu and Peppermint Bark are NOT MY OCS but the person whom this is gifted to's, Tiramisu is a theif and shes the second most wanted (next to Chili Pepper ofc) but she works for Affogato, they have kind of a sibling/father-daughter relationship? Its complicated, also Affogato has autism let's face it.
I think that's it 🙏

Notes:

Work Text:

 “Affogato, I hate to break it to you, but you're a cliché movie villain. None of your plans even make it past that wall, but you keep coming back.” Tiramisu Cookie says, already done with this ‘new plan’ of his.

 “Okay, so my plans aren't always…the best. But! They're all just building up to this moment! Every ‘failure’ is only a minor setback in the grand scheme of things.” Affogato says confidently as he leads his kleptomaniac apprentice to his rather messy room

 “You really got MORE after I burned all your Cream Unicorn merch?” She sighs as he shuts the door behind her.

 “Well, yes. And if I were you, I wouldn't do that again.” He gives her a pointed look as he stops in front of his ‘visionary board’ as he calls it.

 “You're no fun.”

 “I'm plenty fun, Tiramisu. Now, for my plan!” Affogato dramatically spins the board around d to reveal the side that looks like a middle school presentation for an art class. “See?”

 “I see glitter glue.”

 He lets out an exasperated sound, “Yes, I took some artistic liberties this time around. I thought it might be nice for a change.”

 “You hate change?” She points out skeptically.

 “Whatever- to my PLAN!” He clears his throat taking one of those pointer sticks, except it's covered in Cream Unicorn stickers, of course, tapping it to his first bullet point. 

 “Do we get to scale the wall this time?!” Tiramisu asks excitedly.

 “No. First, we will approach the kingdom seemingly unarmed, of course my staff and whatever else will be in your unnaturally, seemingly infinite pockets. We will convince the watchers stationed at the wall to let us pass through by saying we’re sorry or something. That tends to work. Then, once we’re in the kingdom, I’ll get my job back as the foolish king’s right hand and you’ll get to see that little maid friend of yours, you know, the weird one.”

“I told you, she’s not ‘weird’ she-”

“I couldn’t care less. Just be sure she isn’t a distraction. Anywho, after, we’ll crumble Dark Cacao, take the throne, have false sympathy for his death, and since that no-good watcher is always getting in my way, we will simply tie her to a chair.”

 “Why not crumble her too?”

 “Because I want to laugh at her while she’s helpless. Duh.” Affogato rolls his eyes. “And finally, the kingdom will be ours once more.”

 After a moment of him and TIramisu just staring at each other, he speaks again, “So, What do you think?” He puts his hands on his hips, very sure of his plan.

 “I think you actually might not be as dumb as I thought. But, what if Caramel Arrow tries escaping?” Tiramisu asks, still skeptical.

 “She won’t. We don’t need to worry about her when she's captured, trust me!”

 “If you say so. When do we go?”

 “Well…we kind of just spent the whole day explaining my plan…so, tomorrow!”

 The two celebrate the rest of the night, confident in this seemingly full-proof new plan.

 Soon, they’ll be back to their old life and…maybe finally get to better the kingdom without interference.