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“Oh my god, I love you so much! Having you is like a dream! I love everything about you, your looks, your smell, your taste! I can’t wait to taste you over and over, having your sweet taste on my tongue! I dream about it every night, you are absolutely gorgeous and I can’t get enough of you. I’m the luckiest person in the world to have you. Nothing compares to it! I would give my last shirt to …”
“For fuck’s sake, Nelson! I know Oreo is your absolute favourite, but do you need to rub it in like that?”