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Sieun has a lot of things he’d never do. He has a full list in the journal by his bedside, but the most important ones are as follows:
- let someone in his room (his room is far too personal to him, and letting someone in is too vulnerable of an act)
- kiss someone (lots of diseases can be spread from mouth, and kissing someone involves being a lot closer to a human being than he appreciates)
- go outside longer than the bare minimum when its summertime (when he was 7 years old, he passed out in the heat. by the time his parents found him, he had been there for 20 minutes. he came to the next day in a hospital with a horrible headache and the worst sunburn of his life)
Sieun will never do these things, because they are on his list of things he’d never do.
—-
Sieun is sitting at his desk studying. Summer break started this week, but he hasn’t been outside, because it’s been 80° daily (and thats on his list of things he’d never do). Hes on his fourth and final check of his notes when his door buzzer goes off.
“Sieun, let hyung in!” Suho’s voice comes out tinny through the small speaker. Sieun opens the door to a sweaty Suho. His hair is soaked and his cheeks are covered in a sunkissed blush. He looks like a puppy.
“Sieunnnn!” Suho whines as he pushes past Sieun in the doorway, “I’m so thirsty! I was walking home from the restaurant, cause the weather was so nice, and i came across this old man trying to move this heavy table outside, so of course I had to help him! and then i thought i should go visit you, so im here.” Suho takes a gulp of water from the large bottle in the fridge.
“Okay. Do you want to sit down?”
“No, no, no, how could i sit down inside when the weather is this beautiful? Come, lets go sit at the park behind the building.”
Sieun freezes. If he goes outside now, he’ll be breaking his list of things he’d never do. But, he can’t say that or he’ll seem strange.
“O-,” he clears his throat, “okay.”
Suho gives him a strange look, but starts making his way outside for Sieun to follow nonetheless. Sieun takes small steps as the gust of warm air hits him, and he feels the sun shining on face. Internally, he starts to panic. If he passes out in front of Suho it’s going to be so embarrassing.
“Are you feeling okay?” Suho asks once the playground is in sight.
“Yes. Why do you ask? Do i look sick?” Sieun replies. he hopes he doesn’t look sick because thats usually the first sign.
“No, you just seem a little nervous,” Sieun looks down at his feet, “Come on, you’re my best friend. you can tell hyungie anything.”
Sieun breathes in deeply, “I dont like going outside in the summer. I’m afraid i might pass out.”
“Why didn’t you tell me, Sieunie? We can head back now,” Suho turns to make his way back inside.
“No!” Suho looks at him, startled, “We’re almost there anyways, and it hasn’t been very bad. As long as you’re here to keep me safe, i’ll be okay.”
Suho gains an indiscernible expression as he searches Sieun’s face. Suddenly, he grabs Sieun’s hand and starts forward.
By the time they reach the swings, Sieun is feeling strangely. He doesn’t feel like he’s going to pass out, but he doesn’t feel like his normal self either. Suho’s hand in his is causing a tingling to make its way up his arm, yet he thinks he would rather pass out in the sun than let go.
But, alas, they have to separate, so that they can sit on adjacent swings.
“What have you done this summer break so far, Sieunie?” Suho asks, once they’ve both settled in on the equipment.
“I’ve been studying.”
Suho waits for more, but thats it. “Wow, really? I guess hyung will have to drop by your house more often, huh?” he gives a gentle smirk.
“Okay. Are you still working all your part time jobs in the heat?”
“No, only at the restaurant. I always ask for a break during summer at the beginning of the year.”
They talk for a bit longer, until somehow the topic gets to this girl who was flirting with him at work.
“She was so disrespectful. I told her im not interested like four times! And then, when she was finally about to leave, she grabbed me by the collar and kissed my cheek! I pushed her off me and had to scrub my face forever to get her lip stain off.”
Sieun is mad. He’s mad that she would do something like that without permission, but theres also a different kind of anger simmering. It’s like the feeling he got when his dad took the only cup Sieun used as a kid, or when the bullies tried to steal his favorite pen. He’s filled with a rage so deep that he-
“Have you ever kissed someone, Sieun?”
Slowly, a blush spreads from up from Sieun’s neck to his cheeks as he sits there in silence. Why would Suho ask such a humiliating question that he no doubt knows the answer to.
“No,” he mumbles. “Of course not. Do you know anyone who would even think of kissing me?”
Suho’s eyes darken, “Sieunnie, why do you think so little of yourself? A lot of girls at school gossip about your good looks, and I agree. Even I wouldn’t be against kissing you.”
Sieun gives Suho a dead stare as he slowly realizes what he just said. Suho’s jaw drops and he fumbles over thoughts spoken aloud.
“Just- I just meant- ugh. Can I kiss you, Sieun-ah?”
If Sieun says yes to this, he will be doing two things that he’d never do at the same time. But as he looks at Suho’s eyes and lets his eyes trail down to Suho’s lips, he doesn’t think he could say no.
He nods, and Suho moves his lips closer until Sieun feels the softness of them against his own.
—-
Later on, after kissing in the park gets old, Sieun breaks his third rule as well and cuddles Suho in bed until he has to leave for work the next afternoon.