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“Ah, it is…
“Completely empty?”
She fell to her knees. Hadn't he promised that they'd be together forever, just the two of them, in their own world? Her dear, her light, the one who never went back on his word, wasn't anywhere to be seen.
She should've known that it would end like this. After all, she's a human. No alien would warm up to a human, they'd been enemies for centuries. And still, she had kept deluding herself, wanting to believe that they could be different.
With a scream of anguish, Marja was pulled down.
“Contract???” Ace asked, clearly puzzled.
The captive spoke up again, “Exactly. Sign a contract, and we'll be at your service,” Jade replied with a calm smile.
And just as he said that, a document materialized in the duo's hands. “Whoa!” exclaimed Ortho, who had been taken by surprise.
“This is, like, a hundred pages,” Ace waved the papers around, “Ain't no one reading allat, dude. Hard no.”
“Eeeh? I thought you'd be fun to toy with, crabby…”
“Who are you calling-” Ace was cut off.
“Truly, it is unfortunate, don't you think so? They've gone through all this trouble to capture us, and now they're just going to throw it away”
Ortho spoke up, “Hold on for a sec! We accept,” he moved to grab a pen from the desk.
“Wait, what!? Speak for yourself, I didn't agree to shit!”
“Don't you worry, Trappola-san! At the time you were busy complaining, I made sure to read the whole thing! It isn't anything too shady, they're asking for a simple favour. I could show you what rights you'd still have after signing, if you wish to see,” He went through the pages, seemingly searching for something.
“...I guess someone did read all that… Just pass the pen over,” Ace sighed, dejected.
“Of course!”
He muttered under his breath, “The Great Bread Ban, causes and effects, ‘By signing this, you will…’ whatevs, ‘To benefit from our…’ Why does this thing keep repeating itself?”
At last, he scribbled his signature down.
“Awesome! So, now that we're business partners or somethin, wouldcha please unbind us,” Floyd asked, swaying from side-to-side.
“Roger! Though, before that, should we perhaps address the elephant in the room?”
Four pairs of eyes turned to look at the man in the corner, who was visibly distressed. Even when none of them knew him, they could tell that this was not a normal state to see him in.
“...When did we kidnap this guy???”
“Unknown! I don't recall seeing him before,” Ortho floated over.
The man backed up as much as he could, “I,” he began, “I made a miscalculation when using teleportation magic, that's all.”
Ace hummed, “Still doesn't explain why you look so unnaturally stressed, and why you're bound. Say, do you have a hand in The Bread Ban?” He spun his pen in his hand, and pretended that he didn't notice the man stiffening.
“A… bread ban? There is a bread ban?” Said the man, avoiding everyone's eyes.
“Liaaaaaaar!!!!!!” Floyd sang from where he was sitting, having been unbound by Ortho, “How do ya even know about bread, huh?”
“That's-”
Ace's phone rang.
After a few moments of silence, he spoke, “Damn, a shortage of members? Nah, sorry fam, I got stuff to do right now. Wish y'all the best, bye,” Just as he moved to hang up, Ortho, who had been listening, grabbed the phone.
“Jack Howl-san! I'm truly sorry to hear that, I hope everything's alright with Felmier-san… Please tell him that I'm wishing him a fast recovery!” He paused when the other side spoke up, “Ah, It's a family matter? Either way, I hope everything ends well! Bye-bye!” He hung up.
“Dude, you could've just asked to speak to him,” Ace frowned.
Ortho turned back to the man, “Mister! I'm sensing abnormal amounts of stress in your system! Would you like instructions on how to calm down?”
He was cut off by Jade who had an eerie smile on his face, “No need for that. Mister, could you look in my left eye for a second, if you would?
“Shock the Heart.”
“Ooooh, awesome timing!!” Floyd cheered him on.
Jade turned to look at the duo, “What did you say was banned, again?”
“...Bread,” Ace was still sulking for some reason.
“Right! Now, tell me all you know about The Bread Ban, and your involvement in it.”
Baur compiled.
“...So, let me get this straight,” Ace, now sitting on the table, began. “You're seeing someone, and they asked you to ban bread just because they didn't like it?” Baur nodded.
“And, you have a whole another planet where you meet with your secret lover?” Another nod.
“–Who appears to be Epel Felmier-san's grandmother!” Ortho chimed in.
“Riiight…” Ace continued, “Though, how did you even manage to ‘curse’ bread?”
“She… She asked me to poison apple juice.”
“That's it?” Ortho asked.
“Sure is. And I did it, because how couldn't I? I needed to get rid of the reason for my beloved's suffering. I performed a spell that ‘linked’ all apple juices together,” he looked down, regretful.
“Aaaand the bread part?”
“That... wasn't entirely my doing.”
“But, didn'tcha just say that she asked you to get rid of bread?” Floyd tilted his head.
“She knew that someone would curse the apple juice,” he clarified.
“Oh shit! Was it Vil-senpai? The hat man had sounded stressed when we all met back up for the show,” Ace sighed, “Maaaan, we were gonna score some great money."
“Hm, the timeline holds up! That should be when everyone had started falling sick. If they'd drunk apple juice before eating bread, their bodies could've rejected it, assuming that the apple juice could do that…” Ortho pondered.
Baur spoke up, “Correct. I couldn't set it myself, but I managed to inflict a spell that would interfere with a curse. After the juice was drunk, it would immediately affect one's body.”
“How sinister…” Jade commented.
“Damn, I feel bad for Jamil-senpai now, having to take care of the whole dorm,” Ace added.
Floyd, seemingly having grown disinterested, started yapping about how boring everything had gotten.
Ortho said, “Right, we have been here for quite some time. We should wrap this up! Mister, mind undoing the curse?”
Baur's hesitation was visible to everyone with working eyes.
“Hello? Earth to unc? Don't you have a partner you should check up on?” Ace snapped his fingers to gather Baur's attention. Having been convinced, Baur compiled.
“Phewwwwwww, man, am I glad that's over with,” Ace, being held up by Ortho after nearly collapsing to the ground, whined in a low voice.
He paused, “Dude, I appreciate the help but, what do you get outta this? It's not like you eat or somethin,” he moved to lean on the wall, letting go.
“Hm, I hadn't thought about that, honestly! I guess it was a great learning experience, though,” Ortho beamed.
Baur might have gotten hit in the head by an apple Epel threw, but he supposed that was an appropriate reaction, considering he had broken into his house with no warning.
“Baur.”
“Marja…” He crouched down near her bed, and looked her in the eyes.
“Do you want to head over there?”
“Yo, green guy,” Epel shouted in the courtyard, aiming to find Sebek before class started. Thankfully, he spotted him not far ahead
…Though, he was looking quite murderous.
“Human!” Epel covered his ears, “How dare you address me in such a way! As a royal guard to–”
“We're now related. Show some respect, would ya?” Epel countered, leaving Sebek at a loss for words.
“...What.”
“Ya heard me right. Your gramps kidnapped my grandma, n apperantly they're now living on another planet,” his expression was deadpan.
“Excuse me?”
“You're excused. See ya at the family gathering,” with that, he walked away, ignoring the shouts directed his way.
They had won.
Bread was made legal again, now that it possessed no threat to people.
But at what cost?
At the cost of Ace and Ortho scrubbing dishes at some random planet they were pulled to.
Well, Ortho was pretty happy with that, considering he got to see his people, but Ace on the other hand was suffering.
It wouldn't be that bad if this was any other time, but did they seriously need to repay right now? An unbirthday party was just about to begin, and he still had around six stacks of dishes to go through. He was definitely gonna lose his head.
What the hell even was Epel's grandmother's problem?
Scratch that, how the hell did some lady and a human-hating ex-soldier fall in love??
What's next, water getting banned???
…He shouldn't have said that. He hopes Ortho has the ability to shoot water cannons, or else these dishes are never getting done.