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“You look funny.”
Endevour’s eye twitched.
“If you’ve got flames coming out of your ears, does that mean they can come out of your butt as well?”
The Flame Hero’s eye twitched again, and then, “Just who taught you to be so…” He paused, looking at the nightmare in front of him. “…uncultured.”
The girl tilted her head, black hair cascading over her shoulder as she held onto the blue stuffed dog held in her arms, the ugliest dog he’d ever seen. And then she opened her big mouth, and Endevour realized he would soon regret even asking. “Dabi would find it hilarious.”
“Of course, Toya would find it hilarious,” Endevour said, gritting his teeth, very unappreciative of the fact he’d learned his eldest child was still alive when the young man was brought into the hospital and—
—This nightmare in front of him, for some reason, came with it.
And then, the stuffed animal—
The stuffed animal had a tongue that came out of its mouth, going up its nose to pick out a booger and—
“Is that your Quirk?”
“Huh?” the girl said, tilting her head.
“To make stuffed animals, uh…” Endevour watched as the stuffed animal in question blinked its eyes, then smacked its lips. “Why are you making that thing do that? It’s disgusting?”
“Oh?” The girl looked down. “This is Stitch.” And then, “He’s my dog.”
“Look. I get you’ve, uh, thing for your stuffed dog, but…”
“No. Stitch is my dog, and Dabi is my dad,” said the girl who definitely didn’t look like she could be Toya’s child. “Because my sis died and she gave me to him, because he’s a great dad.”
To which Endevour’s eye twitched, feeling Toya agreed to such a thing just to make his life hell, and purposefully found himself with a case of pneumonia that resulted in him ending up in the hospital, and…
“Hi.”
Endevour stared.
“I’m Stitch,” said the creature in the girl’s arms, and suddenly—
Suddenly, Endevour believed he was in hell, because the thing in the girl’s arms wasn’t a stuffed animal, and it wasn’t, most certainly, a dog.
“And you’re a poo-poo head.”
“What?” Endevour asked, eye twitching as he looked at this Stitch.
“Dabi dad says so.”
“I’m in hell,” Endevour decided, not happy with whatever Toya decided to teach whatever the girl’s Stitch was.