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1. behind my eyelids are islands of violence by ceraulean

   Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid  

   • Mature
   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • M/M
   • Complete Work

   09 Mar 2026

   Tags

   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • Shane Hollander & Ilya Rozanov
   • Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov
   • Shane Hollander
   • Ilya Rozanov
   • Pre-Relationship
   • Pre-Slash
   • Angst
   • Hurt/Comfort
   • Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
   • Internalized Homophobia
   • Self-Hatred
   • Self-Harm
   • i dont know if it counts but im tagging it just in case
   • please read the notes for more details
   • Homophobic Language
   • Shane Hollander is in Love with Ilya Rozanov
   • and he hates himself for it
   • and just for being gay in general
   • Shane Hollander Needs a Hug
   • and he gets many
   • Good Friend Ilya Rozanov
   • Autistic Shane Hollander
   • Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends
   • shane and ilya grew up together but in different canadian cities
   • Coming Out
   • Angst with a Happy Ending
   • i mean shane's not happy but he knows he'll get there
   • no beta we die like we wish commissioner cromwell would

   Summary

   "It's not that bad, I'm overreacting."

   Their words aren't even hurled at him. They're tossed about carelessly, without insinuation or thought; yet that doesn't stop them from sliding under his skin, tearing through his flesh, and burying into his bones. He shakes himself, blinking over and over, trying to clear the haze that has settled like fog over his vision.

   Long fingers intertwine with his own, squeezing, grounding him in place. Shane raises his eyes to meet Ilya's.

   "No." It's gentle yet firm; a reminder that Ilya can see through his bullshit, a skill he has somehow always possessed. Shane opens his mouth for a futile retort but Ilya tightens his grip on Shane's hand again. He doesn't let go.

   "They've been saying things, calling me things."

   or

   Shane is struggling with something. He has a breakdown. Ilya is there to pick up the pieces.

   Series

   • Part 4 of Rose and Cera’s Hollanov Childhood Friends AU

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   4,567

   Chapters:

   1/1

   Comments:

   12

   Kudos:

   231

   Bookmarks:

   29

   Hits:

   3,851