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Stronger, not perfect.

Summary:

Steve always knew that the serum’s effects were too good to be true. It not only made him incredibly strong, but also got completely rid of the never-ending list he had of illnesses, did it?

Or,

A small start point on exploring the concept of Steve still dealing with flare ups of his bad health even after the serum, plus some sprinkles of Stony fluff.

Notes:

Minor TW for vomit, not very detailed tho.

I always wondered and had as a headcanon that in reality Steve still had to deal with his original health issues and illnesses, the serum helped his body get stronger and fight those off but they're not completely gone either yk.

This is my first work, it's probably a bit crappy but thank you so much if anyone actually reads it!

Personal sidenote, this is a bit embarrassing to expose but until recently I had a "passive addiction" for c.ai, I really "enjoyed roleplaying" with those bots for hours everyday while doing regular stuff (I e. Watching yt lol) but I've decided to drop it, not only because the app kept getting increasingly worse but because I realised I became dependant. So I decided to instead try to write by my own instead of chatting with ai bots. And although I've never felt very skilled at words, grammar, or just writing stories, I really enjoyed it!! It feels so rewarding too, I hope to keep writing more in the future :) (If things go well, I'll probably post quite often since I always need to do something with my hands even if I'm just watching YT and I have a lot of scenarios and ideas + boredom time)

Work Text:

Steve always knew that the serum’s effects were too good to be true. It not only made him incredibly strong, but also got completely rid of the never-ending list he had of illnesses, did it?

That's what most —if not all— people believe, and Steve can't really blame them considering it took some time for his own self to realise it wasn't that huge magical cure he first believed it was.

The first time he realised what the serum actually did to his body was after he went on and rescued the soldiers and Bucky that Hydra had in their base. He wasn't sure if it was because of the physical strain, the stress, or maybe the emotional state he was in finding Bucky alive but tied on a weird table alone at the Hydra base, but when he came back with everyone and made sure Bucky was checked and physically okay, he started feeling off in the waiting room at the med bay.

“Oh, dear God…” It was all Steve managed to mumble under his breath as he leaned back against the freaky, uncomfortable seat and cold wall. The familiar chest pain and short breath he was once so used to now felt even more concerning and strange than when he was a little boy getting his first asthma attack at the park with an also little Bucky. Steve tried to stay quiet and calm about it, even if it was an absolute shock considering he firmly believed that his health issues were completely gone since the serum was injected into his body, he still knew how to manage a little asthma attack after dealing with those for almost two decades of his life.

The episode passed eventually, although it still left Steve with the familiar lingering soreness on the lungs and chest plus some noticeable exhaustion. He considered himself lucky that when Bucky came out of the office he was okay and also he didn't push much about Steve's answer to why he was so exhausted. He guessed that Bucky still didn't know the full serum thing and its supposed effects, obviously, Steve made a mental note to explain later when they're both feeling better. So basically Bucky still had in his mind the frail, sickly Steve who was more tired than not from just trying to survive, while there was also the fact Steve went all in into a Hydra base and rescued them all.

From there on, Steve was a bit more aware of his modified body’s possible flare ups, although they were rare enough to always catch him off guard unlike when he had to deal with one of the list at least daily. Either way, it didn't really last too long as he drove the Valkyrie into the icy water, forging his own end with it.

Or so he thought…

*****

When Steve woke up from his deep, cold slumber, he felt deeply troubled and overwhelmed to meet his new reality and spent those weeks alone in SHIELD’s training room trying to keep calm while taking everything in by punching God knows how many bags a day.

During that time, Steve was in a bad headset honestly. It wasn't like he wasn't a total reckless, impulsive, self sacrificing bastard before with a questionable ideology towards his own safety but during those weeks he did some stuff that made him feel like Bucky’s spirit would smack him for —if it could—.

He bled over a bunch of those punching bags he kept breaking like fragile glass, red knuckles quickly healing up though. He also felt his body flare up often, whether it were those uncomfortable back aches from his spine, asthma attacks, or so on.

Steve was deeply uncomfortable, he knew that much, and so did the Stark that he met not so long after, this time Tony Stark. The man poked Steve on every poke-able thing he managed to grasp from the star hero, and that along with the unstable mental condition Steve was in, it wasn't messing well with him, seriously.

He and Tony kept a weird mutual hate dynamic for some time until Tony showed his noble will of protecting the innocent even if it meant possibly sacrificing himself. Since then, he and Steve started to slowly get more fond of each other, at some point Tony became Steve's closest anchor in the mass complexity of the new reality he'd have to figure out over time.

*****

Life seemed okay for Steve now, more or less. He had a routine that helped him get through the day without feeling the need to make his knuckles bleed anymore —most days—, and he lived with his team, which helped him feel slightly less alienated and isolated from the new century even if they would sometimes take the ‘old man’ joke a bit too far. Steve was 24, he was a young man with aspiring ideals back in his time. Now? He felt old, antique, sometimes he thought maybe he was nearing an early grave even if he knew he was —still in his mid 20s— but also basically immortal at this point, considering he simply slept off 70 years inside an ice cube under the arctic ocean.

He was always cold though, sometimes he wished to be put back into the ocean and sleep forever but he knew better than to disappoint the people, his teammates, the people in need. No, maybe it was the modern day now, but people still needed heroes or figures to protect them and bring them hope, he couldn't take Captain America away from them.

Steve overworked and overexerted himself quite often, but that wasn't anything extreme in his perspective taking into consideration that most of his teammates worked and trained very thoroughly too, and he was the leader! He should be working the hardest to be able to help people and be a good leader for his team, even if he had to push through flare ups, sometimes some bad ones but he wouldn't let his physical issues make him unable to protect others, not again.

Sometimes his teammates would check on him when he was feeling unwell, not that he ever told them or has let them know about his occasional flare ups, he preferred to keep it private since he was always able to power through and so he considered it useless information for the team. Same went for the general public, completely unaware since the 30s that the serum didn't make the ‘Little Frail Steven Grant Rogers’ say goodbye forever to his health issues. It was for the better though, Steve didn't like having attention on his person, even less if it was related to his physical wellness. Being a very sick people and living in poverty made everyone have an eye on him and his health more often than not for most of his life, and now he was the great Captain America and he'd rather have the medical concerns redirected towards people who actually need it, whether those are innocent citizens or his own teammates. Steve was fine, he would be fine.

That was until the ‘bad flare ups’ one day turned into ‘did the serum effects wear off?’. Steve woke up in the middle of the night, he had another nightmare and he felt sick to his core. His back ached and throbbed, his lungs were like sad deflated balloons, his stomach was turning and churning aggressively, and on top of that his arrhythmia flared up too. Steve tried to be as quiet as possible as he turned and tossed on his bed, then he tried to stand up and tried his best to walk towards the bathroom, his whole vision blurring and swinging.

Steve momentarily blacked out, cursing under his breath as his body stumbled forward, mentally punishing himself because he'd make a loud ass ‘thud’ that would wake up everyone. To his surprise, a pair of sturdy arms grabbed him before he hit the floor. “Woah! Capsicle???” He heard Tony's voice, in a normal time he'd feel extremely ashamed and embarrassed but right now he only mumbled quietly “Bathroom... I'm nauseous.”

Surprisingly enough, Tony didn't ask anything and silently but firmly helped Steve to walk towards the bathroom as steadily as they both managed and as soon as they arrived, Steve emptied his stomach into the toilet. Tony flushed it out and then kneeled beside Steve to rub his back on slow, soothing circles, then, he spoke “Hey, Cap, what's wrong? Didn't know you could get sick, heh.” Tony half joked before sighing and resuming his hand’s motion on Steve's shaking back, noticing the irregular and sped up heartbeat. “Let’s sit you up properly in a comfortable way and then you try to breathe deep and slowly, alright?” He suggests and helps Steve to do so, as Steve works on keeping a steady, deep breathing, Tony grabs a cup and fills it with some cold-ish water to splash it on Steve's face. “This should help with your arrhythmia attack.”

At some point, Steve slipped into the world of sleep, thankfully just pitch black and no nightmares this time. The next morning, he woke up feeling quite exhausted after yesterday's episode. He was a bit surprised when he noticed he was in Tony’s couch-bed thing he has in his workshop for when he passes out after stubbornly overworking himself. “Morning, Capsicle. Did you sleep well?” Steve heard Tony ask, who was already working at his desk with weird, complex technology Steve didn't even want to think much about right now. He simply nodded tiredly and slowly sat up and stretched. “Yeah, uhm, sorry about yesterday” he couldn't help but apologise, remembering yesterday's events and the shame and guilt crippling up to him. “No worries” Tony turned around slightly and gave Steve a small grin to reassure him and continued working.

Steve stood up, fixed his clothes a bit and attempted to walk out of the workshop before Tony asked “Hey, what are you planning big man?” Steve stopped on his track and replied a bit confused “Uh, well. I should probably go train, or prepare and get done all the stuff needed in case we have any big enemies anytime soon and-” Tony sighed obnoxiously loud. “God, just sit your ass down now Cap. I've told everyone you felt unwell already and we all agreed that you should take a break, honestly —I didn't specify on the symptoms you had yesterday— by the way.” Steve's eyes widened so much Tony would have laughed at him at any other moment, “B-but Tony!-” “Oh-ho, did the mighty Captain America just stutter?” Tony teased lightly as he stood up and lightly pushed Steve back into his couch.

“Sooo, you're gonna tell me what the fuck happened yesterday or nah?” Steve puffed his cheek out and shook his head and Tony couldn't resist pinching his cheeks. Steve let out a small whine, but soon they were both cuddling on the couch. “This better effectively keeps you from working today, Steve.” Tony teased while giving the bigger man a squeeze, obviously he knew Steve was way stronger than him and could literally throw him across the room easily if he wanted but he also knew Steve was a sucker for some soft, lovely cuddles from him. It wasn't explicitly official, but their relationship dynamic nowadays was so painfully obvious.

“Will you stay?” Steve asks so quietly Tony almost misses it, he takes some seconds to think and reply in a softer tone. “Of course, as long as you need, sweetheart.” Tony then kissed Steve on the forehead and felt him instantly melt and gay panic inside his head at the same time. Classical Steve, but Tony would never trade the man for anything else. That day Steve rested peacefully and didn't feel that alone for once after so long.