Chapter Text
A note to my lovely readers:
Welcome back to Hogwarts.
When I finished “A Very Inconvenient Potter”, I knew Harry and Severus were not quite done with me yet. Their story always felt like it had one more stage to reach. After surviving war, awkward domestic beginnings, and the occasional emotional catastrophe, it seemed only fair that they should now attempt something even more dangerous.
A relationship.
This second instalment takes place during the following school year, beginning on 1 September 1999. Harry is settling into his role as permanent Defence Against the Dark Arts professor, Severus is attempting to behave like a reasonably functional boyfriend, and Hogwarts itself continues to demonstrate a strong and rather meddlesome interest in their personal lives.
Students are watching. Staff are watching. Owls are watching. Luna is definitely watching, and there may or may not be a betting economy.
Meanwhile Harry is blissfully unaware that certain people in his life have already begun discussing his future in alarming detail.
As always, thank you for reading, commenting, and sharing your enthusiasm for this strange little corner of post-war Hogwarts.
Your support means more than I can properly express. I never thought the first part of this series would gain this many readers who decided to roll with the ridiculousness I thought up with, along with Quill & Chaos (they’ve stopped asking why my brain thinks up such strange things post-epilepsy seizures 😂. The story exploded and as a result has basically been rewritten in whole.
I am pleased to advise that all three parts of this trilogy are complete! I don’t have a posting “schedule” so you may find that one day I only post a single chapter and other days I post a handful. 😅
I hope you enjoy returning to the castle. Things are about to become very inconvenient.
Usual Disclaimer:
The characters and world of Harry Potter belong to J.K. Rowling and the various rights holders who possess far more legal authority than I do. No profit is being made from this work, aside from the occasional burst of serotonin when someone leaves a lovely comment.
This story exists purely for the joy of storytelling and the long-standing fandom tradition of asking the important question:
“What if these two emotionally constipated men were forced to sort out their feelings while living in a castle full of meddling witches and wizards, over-observant students, and at least one owl with very strong opinions?”
Any matchmaking performed by Hogwarts Castle, its staff, its ghosts, or its resident betting economy should be considered entirely unofficial.
Please enjoy responsibly. 💗
Now, enough waffling from me. Let’s move onto the start of our first chapter.
Chapter 1:
The Inconvenience of Being Observed
The Hogwarts Express arrived in a storm of steam, shouting students, and the unmistakable smell of damp wool and treacle tart.
After the war, students seemed nervous about being at the station alone. To remedy this, Professor McGonagall had installed a system in which several professors were present for arrivals.
This was how Harry Potter found himself on the platform at Hogsmeade Station, hands buried in the pockets of his robes, trying very hard to behave like a normal member of staff.
This was considerably more difficult than it sounded.
Partly because hundreds of students were pouring off the train, all of whom appeared to have noticed him standing there, and partly because Severus Snape was standing beside him
Harry kept his eyes fixed on the arriving students.
He could feel Severus’s presence at his shoulder the way one felt a change in air pressure before a storm.
“You are staring very intently at that luggage trolley, Potter.”
“I’m supervising,” Harry said quickly.
Severus’s voice was dry.
“You are supervising a trolley.”
“Students might need help with it,” Harry said defensively.
“Indeed.”
Harry risked a glance sideways.
Severus looked exactly the same as he always did. Tall. Severe. Black robes moving with faint menace in the late summer wind.
Except for one small difference.
His hand brushed Harry’s.
It was a light touch.
Barely noticeable.
Harry was acutely aware of it.
Students continued spilling onto the platform in waves of noise and excitement.
Some of them slowed as they passed.
Others outright stopped.
One third-year girl walked directly into a stack of trunks while staring at them.
Harry winced.
“Are they looking at us?” he muttered.
Severus did not look remotely concerned.
“Yes.”
“That many of them?”
“Yes.”
Harry rubbed the back of his neck.
“Well. That’s not awkward at all.”
Severus’s lips twitched, very slightly.
Across the platform, Professor McGonagall stood near the carriages directing students with the calm authority of someone who had managed Hogwarts for longer than most of its inhabitants had been alive.
She paused mid-instruction.
Her eyes flicked briefly toward Harry and Severus, then she resumed directing students as though nothing at all had happened.
Harry leaned a fraction closer.
“Did she just…?”
“Yes.”
“She definitely noticed.”
“She is not blind, Potter.”
Harry sighed.
“Brilliant.”
A group of sixth-years passed them whispering furiously.
One of them dropped something.
Harry glanced down.
It was a small folded scrap of parchment.
The boy snatched it back up quickly and hurried away.
Harry frowned.
“What was that?”
Severus looked mildly bored.
“A piece of parchment, Potter.”
“Yes, I saw that. Why did he look like I’d caught him committing a crime?”
“Because students are often committing crimes.”
“Fair enough,” Harry said. “Carry on, then.”
They moved toward the waiting carriages with the flow of students.
In the distance, the castle rose above the trees, its towers dark against the late afternoon sky.
Harry felt a familiar tug in his chest.
Home.
It still felt strange to think that.
A pair of second-years hurried past them.
“...I’m telling you, five coins says it happens before Christmas.”
“Before Christmas?” the other boy hissed. “You’re mad.”
Harry frowned slightly as they passed.
“Happens before Christmas?”
Severus made a soft, irritated sound.
“Potter.”
“Yes?”
“Do not encourage them.”
“Encourage who?”
“The students who appear to believe your personal life constitutes a public spectacle.”
Harry blinked.
“Wait.”
Realisation dawned slowly.
“You think they’re talking about us.”
Severus gave him a look.
“Yes, Potter. That is generally how these dunderheads’ conversations have been working this past year.”
Harry glanced back.
Several of them were looking at them again.
Two girls appeared to be writing something down.
Harry groaned quietly.
“Oh no.”
Severus’ voice remained very calm.
“Oh yes. Enthusiastically. We are now dealing with the aftermath. I expect it will be both persistent and deeply irritating.”
They reached the line of carriages.
Harry paused beside the staff carriage and turned toward the castle.
For a moment he simply stood there, taking it in.
Students laughed as the carriages rolled forward, pulled by elegant, if still faintly unsettling, thestrals. The sky was beginning to darken. Torches along the path flickered to life one by one.
Hogwarts looked exactly as it always had, and yet everything felt different.
Perhaps it was because he was beginning his second year as a professor, rather than returning from the wreckage of war. Students were laughing now, instead of grieving.
Beside him, Severus spoke quietly.
“You appear thoughtful.”
Harry shrugged slightly.
“Just thinking.”
“Always dangerous,” Severus said with the faintest smile, “You should avoid it.”
Harry grinned.
“I was thinking that this might be the first time Hogwarts has felt genuinely peaceful.”
Severus studied the castle for a moment.
“Yes,” he said quietly.
Harry glanced at him.
“Do you think it’ll stay that way?”
Severus’s expression was unreadable.
“I sincerely doubt it.”
As they stepped into their carriage, Severus placed a hand, discreet but familiar, against Harry’s lower back. It was a gesture he had begun using without comment.
Harry did not react outwardly.
As the carriage began to roll towards the castle gates, he leaned back slightly, looking out across the grounds.
Students were already hurrying towards the entrance doors.
Behind them, further down the road, several older students had gathered in a tight circle within their carriage.
One of them unrolled a long piece of parchment. Another produced a quill.
A girl spoke in a low voice.
“All right. New term, new odds.”
“Same categories?” someone asked.
“Obviously.”
The parchment was smoothed flat.
At the top, written in large letters, were the words:
====================
SNARRY TERM BETTING LEDGER
First Public Kiss
- Before Halloween – 3:1
- Before Christmas – 5:1
- After Christmas – 7:1
Engagement
- Before Easter – 4:1
- Before Summer – 2:1
Wedding Date
- Spring – 6:1
- Summer – 3:1
- Autumn – 5:1
====================
The girl tapped the parchment with her quill.
“Alright,” she said briskly. “Place your bets.”
Several coins changed hands immediately.
Up ahead, entirely unaware of the thriving economy forming behind him, Harry Potter was explaining to Severus Snape why supervising luggage trolleys was, in fact, a perfectly valid professional responsibility.
Severus listened with the weary patience of a man who already knew, with absolute certainty, that the school year was going to be intolerable.