Chapter Text
The TikTok account appeared on a rainy Thursday evening with a simple green icon and the bio “Keep up with the Bats”. It was one of hundreds of similar accounts, which usually did nothing more than show blurry pictures of vigilantes and tell dramatic stories in voice-over. There was nothing about it that stood out.
Except for one thing.
Oracle.
No numbers, no funky spelling, no underscores or hyphens. Just Oracle.
The people of Gotham knew what that meant. Thanks to the livestream that had gone mega-viral, been in the news for months, and spawned dozens of memes, the rest of the world did too.
The account hit 500 followers within minutes of uploading its first video.
The video opened on Red Robin, who was standing at the head of a conference table next to a massive TV. He looked anxious and was clutching a remote. People were whispering off-camera. The TV screen showed a powerpoint titled, Controlling the Narrative: An Analysis of the Impact of Social Media on Morale and Decreasing Hazard to Civilians.
Footsteps echoed, the whispering cut off, and Red Robin straightened, looking off-camera. There was a long moment of silence before a deep voice spoke:
“No.”
[cut]
Nightwing was standing in front of a huddle of vigilantes, with Red Robin, Batgirl, and Black Bat peering out from behind him. They were inside, a stone floor beneath them and the harsh gleam of industrial lights glancing off their gear, but the conference table was nowhere in sight.
“Please?” Nightwing asked.
The camera turned to reveal Batman in full regalia, staring down at the group.
“No.”
[cut]
Batgirl was hanging off the back of a large black chair. Computer monitors were visible over the chair, but the screens had been blacked out.
“Pleeeease?” she begged.
The chair swiveled and Batgirl scrambled to get her feet under herself. Batman glared at her from the chair.
“No.”
[cut]
The clip showed a slightly grainy city street. It looked like it was pulled from a security camera.
Batman and Robin swung by the camera, capes billowing behind them.
“Please?” Robin asked
They both pulled on their grapples, sweeping their legs up to keep momentum as they reached the bottom of their arc.
“No,” Batman said as they vanished from view.
[cut]
Two people were standing in frame. One of them was visible from the neck down, a slender woman in sweatpants and a crop top. The other was a tall man, dressed similarly in sweatpants and a white shirt. Due to the height difference, he was cut off at the chest.
The woman raised a hand and rubbed her open palm in a circle on her chest.
“Please,” the captions translated.
The man lifted his own hand, sharply bringing his pointer and middle finger down onto his thumb.
“No.”
[cut]
A blurry brown blob filled the frame of the next clip. Said blob was shoved forward, stumbling and revealing itself to be the Red Hood’s jacket. Hood turned and stared at the camera, radiating menace. Several voices whispered encouragement as a black-gloved hand appeared at the bottom of the screen and made a flicking motion.
Hood didn’t move for a long moment. Then he sighed and pulled his helmet off, revealing his domino mask.
“You fucking owe me,” he said lowly before turning on his heel and striding around the corner.
The camera jerked as the filmer hurried forward and peered cautiously around the corner.
Batman was sitting at the computer again. Red Hood walked over and leaned against the desk, slumping until Batman had to look down at him.
Batman looked torn between concern and suspicion, saying something the camera couldn’t pick up.
From this angle, the camera could only see the back of Hood’s head. It was still obvious what he was doing when he reached up and pulled off his domino mask.
Hood must have said something, because Batman’s demeanor abruptly changed from concerned to exasperated. He pinched the bridge of his nose.
[cut]
The video ended on a black screen, words standing out in bright green:
“He said yes.”
OH MY GOD
THEY’RE BACK THEY’RE BACK THEY’RE BACK
i cannot believe
BATMAN HOLY SHIT
:eyes emoji: :eyes emoji: :eyes emoji: :eyes emoji:
they really just wore him down huh
psychological warfare
They girlbossed their way onto tiktok :cry-laughing emoji:
I’ve never seen Batman look that tired and i’ve been caught in several Rogue attacks lmaoooo
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HOOD SAID
- IKR HOWD HE CONVINCE HIM
hood tOOK OFF HIS MASK! batman knows who he is!!!!
- more than that hood is INSIDE batmans lair!
Just when we thought they might not be in the news for a while :laughing emoji:
Two other videos were uploaded only a few hours later. The first featured a black screen with Oracle’s green logo staring out at viewers. Captions appeared under the logo as Oracle started speaking.
“There are a few rules for this account. First, it’s my job to verify that no sensitive information is revealed at any point. This means there will be times where things are cut or censored. Live with it.
“Second, this is not the place to ask for help. This account is not continually monitored—please call 911 instead.
“Third, part of the reason Batman approved of this account is because we’ve had an increase in ‘Batwatchers’ putting themselves in dangerous situations trying to video or photograph us. This makes it much harder for us to help people. Our hope is that first-hand information will lessen people’s desire to follow us in person. Please, for your own safety, the safety of others, and if you want this account to remain active, do not follow us on patrol.
“Fourth, any harassment, explicit messages, or obnoxious behavior will get you blocked. We deal with too much in real life to have patience for it. This is your only warning.
“And finally, Batman gets final say on what we’re allowed to post. Do not pressure us for information or content we cannot give. If you want this account to stay active, be respectful. Oracle out.”
I don’t think I’ve ever been this excited
People are fOLLOWING THEM AROUND?? ARE THEY I N S A N E???
- it’s gotham so. probably
Oracle is an icon tbh
Everyone BEHAVE. If any of you ruin this for us istg I’ll become a rogue
The second video also started on a black screen, though this time Oracle's logo was replaced by words reading, “Consider this an official thank you for agreeing, Batman.”
The words disappeared, replaced by a title card: The Rogues Ain’t Shit: Part 1. Underneath the title, in smaller text, it read, “CW: Gotham Rogue Scarecrow, violence”.
The video showed the Scarecrow, who was standing several yards away from the camera on what looked like the second floor of a mall, with wide walkways around a large open space that spanned several stories. He held a vial of fear toxin above his head, poised to throw it down onto the first floor.
“You will never defeat fear, Batman! It exposes and reveals us, emerging from the darkest parts of-”
A black-gloved hand appeared in frame, whipping forward in a blur. A batarang smashed into the vial, dumping the fear toxin onto Scarecrow himself. The Rogue squawked and frantically tried to clean himself off.
The camera moved leisurely forward. Once he was close enough, Batman’s fist slammed into Scarecrow’s jaw and the Rogue collapsed.
ICONIC
SCREAMING. AND NOT IN THE USUAL SCARECROW WAY
the way he SAUNTERED forward holy shit
pls i need to jnow what that looked like from anither angle oracle PLEASE
Fuck yeah howd you like that taste of your OWN FUCKING MEDICINE PAL
Yessss the OG!!!
I love that they just preemptively made it a series. How much you wanna bet Oracle’s got 73 more videos already locked and loaded?
Ok maybe Batman IS pretty awesome
- MAYBE???
- Bros either not from Gotham or a goon
The Bats’ official TikTok account was all the internet could talk about in the days following the first video drop. News channels picked it up even faster than the livestream, and its follower count continued to climb at a relentless pace.
The internet waited on tenterhooks for the next update. No one knew when it would come. Fans who’d been hoping for daily updates were quickly disappointed. Comments begging for more started appearing on the initial videos—often with dozens of replies from other fans warning them not to piss off Oracle.
Finally, one week later, Oracle dropped another video.
The Rogues Ain’t Shit: Part 2
The video started with a grainy shot of a rooftop, clearly pulled from a security camera. The roof was empty for a moment before Nightwing and Red Robin climbed over the side.
“-so it’s totally not reckless and I need you to help me get it back,” Red Robin said. The audio was perfectly clear, obviously pulled from a high-quality mic and layered over the video.
Nightwing put his hands on his hips. “We’ve seen people break their entire faces and most of their limbs riding on electric scooters. What makes you think a rocket-propelled skateboard wouldn’t be worse?”
“Those people aren’t highly trained vigilantes.”
“And those scooters aren’t going faster than a car. And they have handles.”
“Hey!” a voice snapped.
The video switched to a different camera. The new angle revealed Firefly hovering just beyond the edge of the roof, a flamethrower in his hands.
“Do you mind?” Nightwing said. “We’re trying to talk here.”
“Oh yeah? Talk about this!” Firefly blasted a jet of flame at them.
Both vigilantes ducked out of the way. Nightwing moved toward the edge of the roof and Red Robin moved away. Then Red Robin ran toward Nightwing, his bo staff snapping out to its full length. Nightwing braced his feet and pulled one escrima free.
The video slowed down, allowing viewers to actually see what happened next.
Right before he slammed into Nightwing, Red Robin grabbed the middle of his bo staff with both hands and brought it up in front of him, so it was parallel with his body. Nightwing slid his escrima stick into Red Robin’s empty bo holster, grabbed either side of the bo, and spun in a tight circle, as if he was a weight thrower and Red Robin was the weight. Red Robin swung his legs with the movement. Then, as they made a full circuit, he released the bo staff and went hurtling through the air, right at Firefly.
The Rogue barely had time to shout before Red Robin was arcing over him, the escrima slipping into his hand like it had always been there. He activated the electricity and jabbed it into Firefly’s jetpack, which immediately began smoking.
While the Rogue howled and spiraled downward, Red Robin completed his arc, landing in a neat roll on the roof across the street. Meanwhile, Nightwing shot a grapple line around Firefly’s legs and anchored the other end to the roof. When the jetpack finally died for good, Firefly was left dangling off the side of the building.
Red Robin sent Nightwing a thumbs up.
“I am not telling B to give your skateboard back.”
“Oh come on!”
ORACLE’S BACK THIS IS NOT A DRILL ORACLE IS BACK
The return of the king!!!!
- How do you know Oracle isn’t a woman?
- Memes are gender-neutral
- The return of the monarch!
SJSJDHSHJA THE DISRESPECT
rocket powered skateboard
Red Robin average frat boy confirmed, more at 11.
They really said “anyway”
Forget the skateboard did you SEE THAT COMBO????
Foaming at the mouth
How mad would my gymnastics teacher be
The way they just traded weapons was so smooth
You’ve heard of battle couple now get ready for battle SIBLINGS
RR: rocket powered skateboard. My EMT ass: fear.jpg
Nightwing must be SO STRONG to pull that off you all don’t even REALIZE
The way they didn’t even have to say anything, they just KNEW they were gonna do this.
(lustfully) what kinda cartoon bullshit
After that, the Bats’ account followed a steady routine. Oracle posted once a week, always on a Thursday and always a video showing the Bats doing something impressive.
That left plenty of time for the internet to fill in the gaps. Memes, compilations, edits, reaction videos, analyses, fanart. You name it, people were doing it.
For several weeks, it seemed like the internet’s obsession was at an all-time high, and people figured the interest would plateau and eventually die down.
Then Oracle posted on a Monday.
Confused but elated fans opened the video, expecting to see The Rogues Ain’t Shit: Part 6.
Instead, they were greeted by a new title card: #JustBatThings: Taking The Train. Underneath the title, in large, brightly colored font, it said, “DO NOT ATTEMPT.”
The video was taken from a mask cam. It showed Nightwing standing on a bridge overlooking some train tracks. He peered out into the darkness and then turned to face the camera with a grin.
“Here it comes! You ready?”
“Ready,” Red Robin’s voice said.
The headlight of a train appeared in the distance, rapidly coming closer.
Nightwing jumped onto the wall. The camera jerked as Red Robin followed, tilting down momentarily as he gauged the distance to the ground before panning back up to keep both Nightwing and the approaching train in view.
“Wait for it,” Nightwing murmured. His hand appeared in the corner of the camera frame, braced on the edge of the wall. “Wait for it. Now!”
They both leapt into space. The train’s headlight grew rapidly, its horn blaring.
The video turned into a blur of light and dark and motion. Then it steadied, showing Red Robin’s hands gripping the top of a train car.
In front of him, Nightwing rose to his feet, legs braced to keep himself upright against the screaming wind.
“Four minutes to the harbor!” he called as if he was a conductor. Then he flashed a bright smile toward Red Robin. “Just enough time to get a few laps in.”
“Last one back pays for milkshakes,” Red Robin said. The camera jerked as he whipped around and sprinted down the train, Nightwing shouting a laughing protest after him.
EARLY ORACLE VID????
MORE UPDATES???
Let’s go jump on a train with mama.
Oh so they’re insane
- we been knew
- You must be new here.
Even vigilantes gotta take the train sometimes!
I can get behind most of what the bats do but this is just irresponsible!!
- Pretty sure everything they do is irresponsible…
- They DID say not to attempt it.
Wait I think I figured out why they do this! They spend a lot of time on tall buildings, where the wind can get really strong, so they need to be able to keep their balance! This is training!
- I guess a train…MIGHT be safer than a skyscraper….
- You telling me Batman can’t afford a wind tunnel? That man goes through a mega car a year.
- thats probably why he cant affors a wind tunnel
At least they weren’t blindfolded this time
- what
- I beg your fucking pardon?
- THIS time??
World’s most insane adrenaline junkies.
The following week, an extra video was posted on Wednesday.
#JustBatThings: Playing H-O-R-S-E
The video was taken by a security camera, and it opened on the roof of the GCPD, identifiable by the Bat Signal half in frame. In close center frame, Batman stood speaking to a man with graying red hair and a trench coat. Text and an arrow popped up beside the man, identifying him as Commissioner Gordon. Slightly larger text appeared over the two of them, saying, “Debriefing on a newly solved case.”
The text disappeared and the video zoomed in slightly, drawing attention to the slightly blurry figures behind Batman and Gordon. They were clustered by the far end of the roof, and fans of the account could identify Robin, Batgirl, Nightwing, and Red Robin.
The video changed to a camera on the building right across from the vigilantes, reversing the groups’ positions so Batman and Gordon were in the back of the shot. The switch revealed that Black Bat was also part of the group. She’d been completely invisible from the first angle, since the only color on her outfit was hidden by her cape.
The switch also revealed that the vigilantes were peering over the side of the building, their heads moving in sync as they watched something below. Then, as one, they all straightened up. Nightwing grinned and folded his hands behind his head, the picture of smug confidence, while the others murmured and huffed.
“No shot,” Batgirl said, arms folded and hip cocked. “I don’t care how much ninja training you have, you can’t copy that.”
“Maybe the rest of you cannot,” Robin sneered. “But do not project your paltry abilities onto me.”
Black Bat clapped her hands softly. Everyone turned to look at her.
“My turn,” she signed.
Nightwing nodded. “Whaddya think? Can you match thirteen?”
“Easy,” Black Bat signed.
Nightwing’s grin widened, and he stepped aside so Black Bat could take his spot. ”Let’s see it then.”
Black Bat stepped forward, pulling a batarang out of her belt. She weighed it in her hand as she looked over the side, everyone else clustering back around.
The camera switched to Black Bat’s mask cam. As her gaze moved over the building opposite and the alley below, small red circles appeared, thirteen in total. The last circle had the silhouette of a batarang sticking out of it. A caption popped up saying, “Nightwing’s shot.”
Black Bat threw the batarang.
It would’ve disappeared in the darkness, but the video helpfully tracked its path with a yellow line. The batarang hit the first two circles perfectly, but then the positioning of the line started to shift off-center. The vigilantes could apparently see it too, as Black Bat slammed her fist on the top of the low wall surrounding the roof, and the other Bats oohed.
The video cut back to the security feed from the opposite building, showing Black Bat stalking away from the edge of the roof as the others crowded even closer to watch the batarang’s path.
There was an almighty crash of breaking glass.
Everyone froze.
In the back of the frame, Commissioner Gordon whipped around. “Robin,” he barked.
Black Bat didn’t twitch, but every other vigilante cringed simultaneously.
“What did you do now?” Gordon demanded, hands on his hips. Batman loomed over his shoulder.
The cluster of Bats by the wall all made varying outraged noises, gesturing emphatically toward Black Bat. Being the farthest away from the crash, she looked the most innocent.
“I don’t want to hear it,” Gordon said. “Whatever it is, go clean it up.” He turned back to Batman.
The video switched back to Black Bat’s mask cam. She looked from the other vigilantes to Gordon and back again. Then she held up an ‘L’ sign.
This prompted a new wave of protests, which was quickly silenced by Gordon’s barked, “Now!”
The vigilantes all glared at Black Bat as they climbed over the wall and dropped into the alley. Nightwing made a final ‘I’m watching you’ gesture before vanishing after the others.
oh so theyre SIBLINGS siblings
Calling them all losers after framing them is WILD. I love her.
I do not accept this Black Bat slander, my Queen is perfect in all that she does :crown emoji:
Why Robin out here catching strays :crying emoji:
- right??? the injustice of it all!
They ALL cringed so hard when Gordon yelled Robin’s name. I’m telling you guys, they all used to be Robin. This is the proof!
- not this again
- bro let it go. the conspiracy girlies are not going to fuck you
- ok but if it’s true I lowkey love the idea of the Commish using Robin as a catch-all for the lot of them. like I don’t know which one of you did it but it’s ONE OF YOU
As someone with siblings, I can confirm that the Parental Rage Voice™ absolutely causes that reaction, no matter whose name is being yelled.
- does this mean Gordon is their parent????
- #Batmish? #Batdon? #Combat?
- COMBAT!!!!
This is absurdly dangerous! What if someone walked into the alley? That glass could have been someone’s face!!
- eh if they’re in an alley in Gotham they probably deserve it
- what is wrong with you
Is no one going to mention how impressive Nightwing’s aim is???
- At this point, nothing could surprise me.
Oracle continued posting regularly on “Throwdown Thursdays”, as the fans had dubbed them, and #JustBatThings videos continued popping up at random. Fans theorized that Oracle was in charge of the combat videos, while the other Bats contributed to the others.
They were proven right on a Saturday, when a new video dropped that was actually filmed like a TikTok, with a phone instead of a mask or security camera.
Batgirl grinned at the camera. She was in full costume, the stone walls and bright lighting of the Bats’ base behind her. Next to her, the edge of someone’s shoulder was visible.
“I’m super behind the times, but I just gotta know.” She leaned to the side, throwing her arm around Red Robin as she brought him into frame. “Would you still love me if I was a worm?”
Red Robin looked up from where he’d been peering at something off-camera.
“I would find a way to turn myself into a worm too,” he said solemnly. “So we could be worms together.”
Batgirl gasped, delighted. “Wormception.”
[cut]
The camera shook wildly as Batgirl ran across a blue gym mat. “‘Wing!” she called, pointing the camera up, where a man was swinging on a pair of gymnastic rings. He was dressed in workout clothes, and his face had been fully blacked out. “Would you still love me if I was a worm?”
Nightwing paused, holding himself up on the rings easily. “Of course,” he said warmly. “How could I not love your true form?”
Batgirl shrieked in outrage. Nightwing laughed loudly, flipping off the rings.
[cut]
“Oh my god, I didn’t think I’d get to ask him,” Batgirl said, once again running. She flipped the camera around to reveal the Red Hood parking his motorcycle. The area around him had been blacked out, so viewers couldn’t tell how big the room was or if there were any other vehicles present.
“Hood, would you still love me if I was a worm?” Batgirl almost shouted, still a few yards away.
Hood paused in taking off his gloves. “The fuck kind of question is that?”
“One I want an answer to!”
Hood pulled off his helmet, revealing a domino mask and a raised eyebrow. “Is this a Metamorphosis thing? Because he got turned into a cockroach, not a worm-”
[cut]
“Robin, would you still love me if I was a worm?” Batgirl asked, leaning across a table. Robin was seated on the other side, looking at something on the table that had been blacked out.
“I would love you more as a worm.”
“Hey!”
[cut]
The camera pointed up at a dark ceiling before Batgirl turned it to the side, revealing another gym mat that she appeared to be lying on. Beside her was a small woman who was doing pushups. Like Nightwing, she was wearing workout clothes and her face was fully blacked out. “BB, would you still love me if I was a worm?”
Black Bat’s head tilted up and to the side. She didn’t pause in her pushups.
“I would have…little worm jar,” she said. “Carry you with me.”
“Aw!” Batgirl cried.
[cut]
“Oracle,” Batgirl said. She held the phone at arm’s length as she lounged back in the big computer chair from the Bats’ very first video, revealing the wall of computer screens behind her. The screens had all been blacked out again, except for one that showed Oracle’s logo. “Would you still love me if I was a worm?”
“No.”
Batgirl clutched her chest dramatically enough that she fell out of the chair.
[cut]
The video opened on the Batmobile, though most of the details had been blacked out. A pair of legs stuck out from under it.
“Hey B,” Batgirl said.
A grunt sounded from under the car.
“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”
There was a moment of silence. Then Batman pushed himself out from under the car and sat up. He was wearing coveralls and his face had been blacked out.
“Did you come into conflict with a magic user?” he asked.
Batgirl snorted.
WORMCEPTION
That was COLD Nightwing!
true form :crying emoji:
Red Hood continually failing to beat the nerd allegations.
- Robin continually upholding his status as savage little sibling
Black Bat’s BICEPS THO CAN WE TALK ABUT HER BICEPS
- forget bicepts did you see her SHOULDERS????
Oracle just said “no” omg
Oracle don’t give a FUCK
Batman out here thinking the worm is a real risk :skull emoji:
Tag yourself I’m “we can be worms together”
And they were wormmates!
- oh my god they were wormmates
Laying on the mat while your buddy works out is honestly a MOOD tho
- She’s just like me fr
Things devolved from there.