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It’s another sleepless night. You wander the dark and empty halls of the Digital Circus
You have a lot on your mind. Loneliness and dread take reign over your thoughts, keeping rest from reaching you.
You’d hoped to find someone to talk to. Anything to help you feel a little less alone. But everyone else has gone to bed. Even that manic ringmaster has retired to sleep mode for the night.
All you can do for the time being is… walk.
When you eventually approach the main hall, something catches your eye - Kinger’s trusty pillow fort.
As you walk closer to the pillowy structure, your ears pick up on a low, droning sound emitting from it. The sound becomes much clearer as you stand right beside it.
“Om… Om…”
It sounds a bit like Kinger’s voice. You wonder what he’s doing, but you don’t want to startle him.
You crouch down close to the ‘door,’ and softly whisper his name.
“...Oh!”
It seems you did startle Kinger. But his reaction isn’t as loud and abrupt as it usually is. It’s more of an expression of mild surprise.
You apologize to Kinger for startling him, and ask if you can come in.
Kinger shifts the pillows that act as the ‘door’ out of the way. He greets you with inviting eyes.
“Of course. Please, come on in.”
You crawl in and find yourself a space to settle down. You see a loose pillow you can use as a cushion, and take a cross-legged seat upon it.
“How are you holding up? Anything you wanna talk about?”
You explain to Kinger that you’ve been having trouble sleeping, and that you just can’t seem to settle your mind down.
You feel so hopeless in this world. You have no idea how long you’ll be able to stay sane.
You ask Kinger how it is he’s been able to survive for so long here. You ask how he seems to have such a resilient mind.
“Hmmm… Well… Would you like me to teach you something that’s helped me a lot?”
You nod, looking back at him attentively.
“Well, I was just in the middle of meditation. I always practice at night, when it’s dark and easier for me to focus. It’s really helpful when my thoughts become too much to bear.
“Why don’t you get into a comfortable position? I’ll lead you through a session. I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.”
You adjust your position on your cushion until you’re certain that you’re comfortable. You had no idea Kinger was into meditation. You’re a bit curious as to how a session with him would play out.
Kinger grabs the pillow that he had been sitting on before you entered. He kneels upon it in front of you in a vaguely seiza-like position, his hands resting one atop the other in his lap. Given his lack of legs, it’s the only meditative position he can manage.
He notices that you look a bit unsure.
“Oh. You seem kind of tense. It’s okay. I think I have something that can help with that.”
Kinger closes his eyes and focuses for a moment. After a few seconds, a butterfly with a soft, glowing, reddish-pink aura appears atop his hands that rest in his lap.
Your eyes become wide. You wonder how he was able to do that. Besides Caine, you’d never seen anyone else in the circus create anything from thin air.
Kinger opens his eyes slightly and looks at you again.
“Here. This is a calming butterfly. I dreamed her up to help me relax when I need it. I think she’ll help you too.”
Kinger slowly raises his hands, which causes the butterfly to fly towards you.
The butterfly lands on your forehead, just above your eyebrows. You can feel her little legs slightly tickling you, but it doesn’t bother you at all.
You look up at her curiously. She slowly opens and closes her wings in a consistent pattern.
“Now, look… Do you notice how she’s moving her wings? She closes them within four seconds, and keeps them closed for four more. Then she opens them within another four seconds, keeps them open for four more, and repeats the cycle.
“I’d like you to try to breathe in time with her. Breathe in for four seconds as she closes her wings, hold it for four seconds, breathe out as she opens her wings, and hold it for another four seconds. And keep repeating the process just like that.
“Inhale…
.
.
.
.
“Hold…
.
.
.
.
“Exhale…
.
.
.
.
“Hold…
.
.
.
.
“And repeat.
“There you go. Just like that. This breathing technique helps calm the parasympathetic nervous system. Once you feel yourself starting to relax a bit more, you might try breathing at a slower, more natural pace.
"Maybe right now, you can start to notice a gentle tingling sensation in your forehead. That’s the butterfly. She’s transmitting a gentle vibration that subtly slows down brainwaves, which helps relax the recipient’s mind. That’s why I call her my “calming butterfly.”
“Keep focusing on that sensation as you keep breathing steadily… That comforting tingling in your brow… Let it relax you even more… Om…”
Kinger begins humming his mantra again.
You bring your attention to the pleasant sensation in your forehead as you continue breathing. It seems to spread to the rest of your head, causing you to feel as though you’re on the verge of sleep. However, you know that you’ll be able to stay focused and awake.
You gaze over at Kinger. You notice something interesting happening. Whenever he pauses between breaths, he seems to glow ever-so-slightly. It’s not an intense glow. It’s more like a nightlight in a childhood bedroom. Just bright enough to let you know that you’re not alone in the dark.
Kinger’s half-lidded eyes seem to “smile” at you endearingly.
“Heh… I can tell you’re starting to relax. That’s good. Just keep going. You’re doing a great job.
“Just for now… I'd like you to think of this fort as a safe haven. Nothing can hurt you here.
“The fort is like a soft, pillowy chrysalis. Warm, dark, quiet, and cozy. It’s a place where you can rest, heal, and grow.
“I’m right here with you, and so is my butterfly. We’re both here to watch over you and help you relax, so that you can safely drift deeper and deeper into a meditative state. Om…”
You hang onto Kinger’s warm, nurturing, parental voice.
The vibrations from the butterfly flow down from your head…
to your neck…
...your shoulders…
…your arms…
…your torso…
…and down through your legs, to the tips of your feet.
Your entire body becomes soft and tingly, as if you and the calming butterfly have become one entity. In fact, it’s as if nothing is separating you from your surroundings.
Your body and mind have simply become pure vibration, resonating in sync with the pillow fort, and with Kinger.
You smile a bit as you bask in this strange, healing sensation.
“I know that expression… You’re experiencing oneness, aren’t you? That’s how the butterfly’s always made me feel.
“She’s helped me get out of myself for a bit, and realize that I’m not as alone as I sometimes think I am.
“Through all the noise and the chaos… all the tension and uncertainty… it’s easy for us to forget what really matters - the fact that we’re all connected.
“It may not seem like it at times. Sometimes we don’t appreciate each other - or ourselves - as much as we should. Sometimes we may even hurt each other… and ourselves in the process.
“But, if you’ll excuse the somewhat flowery metaphor, we’re all threads in the same tapestry. By caring for one another, and ourselves, we help to hold each other together.
“How we care for ourselves reflects how we care for the people around us. And the care that we show for them goes a long way.
“We all deserve kindness. We all deserve compassion. We all deserve understanding. We all deserve to know that we’re not alone… That includes you.
“That’s why I think meditation is an important practice to adopt. Allowing yourself to simply exist without judgment is one of the greatest acts of kindness you can extend to yourself. And when you’re kind to yourself, it becomes so much easier to be kind to others, and help them be kinder to themselves in return.
“From now on, I’d like you to take a little time every so often… whether it’s with me, or on your own… to just sit in stillness. Promise me you’ll do that, okay?”
You nod slowly, with a peaceful smile still adorning your face.
Kinger’s eyes ‘smile’ at you once more.
“Thank you. It really means a lot to me. I want you to be safe just as much as everyone else here.”
Kinger’s eyes fully close.
“Now… Let’s just continue to bask in this oneness for a while. Take as much time as you need, okay? I’m right here with you. Om…”
Kinger resumes the droning mantra from before.
You continue to breathe in rhythm, allowing his voice to harmonize with the vibrations you’re experiencing from your new butterfly friend.
You soon find yourself quietly humming along with him. As you do, your mind drifts to the people you care about in this world.
You see them, and yourself, with a newfound sense of appreciation and compassion.
You recognize that you are all connected.
“Om…”
