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In many cultures, gossip has existed for centuries and contributed to the development and evolution of humanity's complex social tapestries. According to some historians, gossip may have been one of the contributing factors that made human evolution so unique. Many animals have their own complex forms of language to communicate danger. Many animals have their own complex systems of language to communicate danger; however, these systems lack imagination and the ability to convey more complex ideas about their own kind. Gossip allowed many early humans to communicate trustworthiness through imagination. After all, a group of people wouldn’t want to keep a known thief, murderer, or troublemaker within their tribe, inviting social disorder and chaos.
Yes, gossip, for its part, has had its place among mankind for centuries.
Sakura, however, did not know or understand its long history. All he knew was that he hated gossip and that it only brought him headaches.
When he was younger, he felt like a fly trapped in the tales everyone wove around him. Gossip followed him everywhere he went. From relatives to foster families, from students to his teachers, from the aunties and grannies in the neighborhood to the store clerks. Some story or other was connected to him.
When he was in elementary school, he heard one teacher tell another that he had been expelled for breaking a teacher’s nose. He did not remember ever doing such a thing, and the only reason he transferred schools was to move into the nearby orphanage.
In his old town, he couldn’t enter the convenience store near him because the owner had heard from some granny that he would always steal from her shop. He had only set foot in her shop once before being shooed away for looking like a delinquent.
When he was in middle school, five boys in his class jumped him when one of their girlfriends claimed he made a pass at her. He did not. She had been kissing one of her boyfriend's friends behind the gymnasium and panicked when Sakura accidentally saw them.
Wherever he went and whoever he met, gossiping jerks seemed to spin their webs, and he was always at the center.
When he first moved to Makochi, he thought it would be like everywhere else, judgmental, tight-knit, and everyone in each other’s business. To his surprise, most people rarely participated in gossip and were very open to meeting someone before judging them, even him, who appeared very different from the average Japanese teen.
Sakura thought he had finally landed somewhere free of the sticky tales people cocooned around him. He never thought he might have landed in the one web that contained a very dangerous spider.
When he left Pathos that morning and walked to Furin, he felt the hairs on his neck standing up, the feel of eyes, and the hushed sound of whispers. People were talking, and they were talking about him.
He had learned to ignore it before, but now, after so long without the whispers or the snickers under their breaths, he felt exposed.
Why were they talking about him? Were they talking about him?
He turned his head to two older ladies talking on the street. They turned their heads quickly when they realized he was looking at them. They covered their mouths, hiding their smiles and laughter.
Yeah, they were talking about him.
That just left the ‘why’. He hadn’t done anything wrong, and the people here were generally accepting of his looks. That only left one logical conclusion in his mind. Rumors traveled fast and far, and it wasn’t a far stretch that rumors from his old town could have traveled to Makochi. The only question was, which one?
He never took much stock in the gossip that followed him. People would make up rumors about him all the time. He only really cared if it was serious, like possibly getting him expelled or having the police knock on the door. It rarely came to that; usually, they just told stories behind his back for entertainment. Maybe some guys would use it as an excuse to pick a fight, but he never cared if they had a reason for that or not. He’d just enjoyed the opportunity to let off some steam.
Maybe Nirei would know. He had information about everyone in town. If he knew Suo hated natto, then Nirei would know what rumor made its way to Makochi.
He picked up his pace as he walked towards Furin. As he got closer and closer to the school, the glances and hidden laughter changed to pale faces when they saw him. They now acted as if he were a walking dead man.
What was up with the shift?
Up ahead, he saw Anzai spot him and turn away.
That was enough! He wasn’t going to sit around and wait for his funeral while others knew exactly what was going on. He made a direct path towards Anzai. His pace was swift, and Anzai had no chance of avoiding his outstretched hand. He grabbed the other’s shoulder and spun him to look Sakura directly in the eyes.
He let out a yelp, about to question Sakura, but Sakura was quicker with his questioning.
“The hell’s up with everyone?” he asked as he let go of Anzai’s shoulder. The poor guy looked terrified as he looked around.
“W-what do you-” Anzai began to say, but was cut off by Sakura.
“Everyone’s been talkin' behind my back and yer all actin’ like you’ve seen a ghost. What’s goin’ on?” his expression was getting more annoyed as he questioned Anzai.
Anzai, for his part, looked down guiltily as he squirmed in his captain's presence. Finally, he replied, “I honestly don’t know what's going on, but people are saying Umemiya isn’t happy and is looking for you! Hiragi has been upset all morning. Poor guy has had 2 packs of Gas-kun 10 just this morning! He said if we saw you, to tell you to lie low. But knowing you-” He stopped talking and seemed to debate how to say his next words carefully before continuing, “Nirei messaged us saying it might be better to keep you in the dark so you didn’t just confront Umemiya.”
“That’s why everyone’s been avoidin’ me?” he asked, and Anzai nodded. The other teen looked a little more relaxed without that weight on his shoulders.
“Tsk, whatever,” he said as he started to make his way towards Furin again.
“Wait, where are you going? Maybe if you are going to lay low, you shouldn’t do it at school!” Anzai said as he chased after Sakura.
“I ain’t layin’ low,” Sakura looked to Anzai before continuing, “I’m goin’ right to Umemiya to straighten this out.”
Anzai’s face went white as he processed Sakura’s words. He didn’t care if Anzai was scared of Umemiya. Sure, the guy was strong, but scary? Maybe. But he was also understanding. Sakura, for the first time, wanted to confront the rumors surrounding him. He didn’t want to let them sit and linger, because if he did, he knew that the pressure around his chest would grow tighter. He knew he would be back on that tightrope, unable to breathe, because now he actually cared about these people.
He clenched his fists to hide the shaking and marched towards Furin, more specifically, the rooftop garden where Umemiya was most definitely waiting. In his pocket, he felt his phone vibrate and ring that annoying tea jingle Kiryu set it to.
He didn’t stop walking, but pulled the phone out and answered it. Nirei’s panicked voice sounded through the speaker, “Sakura! Please tell me Anzai was just joking! You aren’t actually on your way to Umemiya!!!”
“Anzai told ya that fast?” he looked back slightly and saw Anzai tapping on his phone frantically. He rolled his eyes and continued walking.
“Sakura!” Nirei whined into the phone, “This isn’t the time for joking! Hiragi said to keep you away from Umemiya, and we are trying to figure out what Umemiya heard! Promise you won’t go up there before we figure this out!”
He walked through the entrance of the school and started to walk up the stairs.
“Wouldn’t it be easier to just ask him?”
“It would be easier if we could know why he was mad! WHAT DID YOU DO?”
He pulled the phone from his ear, “I didn’t do nothin’ so there’s no point figurin’ it out! If he’s so mad, then we can talk it out with our fists!”
He was halfway to the roof when he heard Nirei whine. There was some shuffling, and then he heard Suo’s voice, “Well, if you are determined to die, please allow us to say our goodbyes first.”
He could feel that smug grin through the phone, but replied, “Fine. Meet me at the stairs before the roof. I’m almost there.”
He pressed the red phone button, not waiting for Suo to say anything else. He knew they’d be there.
And there they were as he made it to the last flight of stairs before the roof. Nirei looked on the verge of tears, and Suo, behind that ever-present mask of amusement, had a slight twitch at the corner of his mouth as he fought to keep his smile.
“So, have you made your peace with God?”
“Not funny, Suo!” Nirei yelled at the other.
“Whatever, I’m not gonna die,” he rolled his eyes and pushed back. He could hear voices talking from the other side of the door to the roof.
Before Nirei could give another plea to turn back, Sakura swallowed past the tightness in his chest and opened the door.
There on the roof stood a frantic Hiragi. Beside him, Kaji and Sugishita both stood, surprised to see them. And sitting at the meeting table was Umemiya, chin resting on fingers threaded together. He was waiting patiently.
The air was thick with tension. Sakura felt like he had finally made it to the center of this web, and there the spider sat.
Umemiya’s eyes moved from Hiragi over to Sakura’s. He had only seen Umemiya that serious a handful of times: when Choji Tomiyama walked into Furin, leaving a trail of Bofurin bodies behind him; when he accidentally called Kotoha old; and when Umemiya fought Takiishi Chika.
A chill ran down his spine, and he contemplated whether Nirei was right after all. He never wanted that stare locked on him. It was cold like every other stare he met before Makochi.
An unintelligible buzz of whispers started to fill his ears.
Every step he took towards Umemiya was like walking on a thread. If he made one bad move, if he fell, his life at Furin would be over. Everyone looked up to Umemiya, and if he said Sakura was no longer welcome, that was it for his life in Furin and Makochi. For once, he very much cared about what someone thought.
“I thought I told you guys to keep him away!” Hiragi yelled at his two vice captains. He was already popping out 2 more Gas-kuns.
“Oh, we tried, but you know, Sakura,” Suo replied to Hiragi. Sakura wondered if the worry had bled more into Suo’s expression, but his eyes were glued to the blue ones in front of him.
“Tsk, I wanted to know what everyone’s been sayin’ about me behind my back,” He walked closer. He hoped the taller one sitting down couldn’t hear how off his breathing was. “And if it comes to fightin’, so be it. We can talk with our fists!”
“Apparently, the new student just got out of juvie.”
“I don’t want a thief in my store!”
“He wouldn’t leave me alone!”
“I don’t want to fight,” was the slow and restrained words of Umemiya.
“So then tell me, what’s got ya so pissy!!!” He slammed his hands on the table. He was hunched over the table now, glaring right back into Umemiya’s eyes. He was positive Umemiya could feel how labored his breaths were.
He couldn’t breathe right. His chest was being wrapped tighter.
“Did you hear? I heard he-”
“No way. I heard it wasn’t one guy, it was-”
“Either way… he’s a-”
“I want to know, did you,” Umemiya started to say as he stood up slowly.
“Did he really-”
“Hey, man, I heard some rumors. Did you-”
Sakura couldn’t hear the defeated sigh of Hiragi or Nirei’s desperate pleas for the older student to help Sakura. All he could hear was Umemiya and his own heartbeat.
“Did I what?” he pushed the words through his teeth.
“Did you really kill someone?”
“Did you really sleep with my sister?”
…
The rooftop was silent. Some wind rustled in the carefully tended crops.
He didn’t know what everyone looked like when they heard the question. All he knew was that the blue eyes in front of him were cold as steel and that his own face felt hot as coal.
“W-what?” he stuttered out as he took a step back. Did he hear that right?
“Did you sleep with Kotoha?” Umemiya said slower and somehow more dangerously.
“Sakura, how could you!” Nirei gasped.
He quickly turned his head to Nirei and yelled, “I didn’t sleep with her!”
The buzzing grew louder. They took on different and frighteningly familiar voices.
He looked back at Umemiya and repeated, “I promise I didn’t touch her!”
“Did you really try to steal my girlfriend, FREAK?”
“Then why is everyone saying Granny Sato caught you two at Pathos yesterday?” He asked as he made his way around the table.
“He wouldn’t leave me alone!”
“Yesterday?” he thought back to the fight the two had had, and when he grabbed her hand. Granny Sato had walked in shortly after they made up and started teasing them.
“Yeah, I saw him corner her.”
“She must have been talking about when she saw me grab Kotoha’s hand,” he said as he covered his face. His face was hot, and he couldn’t breathe right.
Everything was too loud; too tight.
“He grabbed her.”
“You grabbed Kotoha?”
“You grabbed her?”
“Wait! That sounds bad!” Sakura tried to backtrack.
“Oh, it definitely sounds bad,” he heard Suo say. The amusement was completely back in his voice. Why was he so amused by this? What was funny about this?
“I didn’t do anything!”
“Listen, she was actin’ crazy and was walkin’ away!” he started to defend himself, “I didn’t want-”
“Are you saying my girlfriend’s a liar?!”
“My little sister isn’t crazy,” the upper-classman said with a frown as he folded his arms. He still didn’t look very happy or relieved.
“Well, when she was throwin’ a fit over what I wanted to eat-” he stopped talking. What was even the point?
“Why should I trust someone like you?!”
“You two argued over food?” the older asked. His voice softened with confusion. But the buzzing only grew louder.
“What does it matter what we argued over?” There was no point in arguing anymore. People never listened. They only wanted to hear confirmation of whatever variation of the story they heard.
“I don’t care what you have to say. How can I even trust what you have to say?”
Sakura widened his stance. The buzzing just wouldn’t stop, and there was no more give in his chest to allow air in.
“Those boys will be out for a week.”
“If ya wanna fight, let’s just do it,” he brought his fists up. There was never a way out of a web once you were caught, and Sakura knew that. The one thing he could do was what was expected of him.
He couldn’t see the other’s face become more confused. All he saw were the smiling faces of everyone too stupid to see they were just flies trapped in the same web as him.
“Why would each one of them make up the same story?”
“I don’t want to fight, I just want to know what-” Umemiya stopped short as he dodged Sakura’s fist.
“We just can’t have that behavior here.”
“Ya don’t wanna know anything! Ya just want me to tell ya what you wanna hear!” He threw another punch. This time, Umemiya caught it in surprise.
“S-Sakura! What are you doing?!?!” he heard Nirei’s panicked voice.
“Nirei let Umemiya handle it.” Suo wasn’t amused anymore.
“Expelled again?”
He pulled his caught fist back, attempting to knock Umemiya off balance. He then brought his knee up to hit him in the gut, attempting to knock the air out of him.
Umemiya, however, was more experienced and caught his knee, deflecting it away and throwing off Sakura’s balance instead.
“Whoa, I never wanted to fight you, Sakura,” he said while avoiding an elbow to the face as Sakura recovered.
“We can’t keep having you move schools! It’s too burdensome!”
“Then why were ya lookin’ for me?! Everyone actin’ like yer gonna beat the shit outta me,” he yelled and tried for a kick this time. Why wouldn’t he just fight back? That’s what he wanted, right? That’s what they always wanted.
“You are going to apologize for the sake of your reputation and the school’s.”
With a sigh, Umemiya caught Sakura’s kick, using the leg to pull him close, and pushed his fist into Sakura’s face. It was just short of connecting and got the message across right away. If Umemiya had wanted a fight from the start, he wouldn’t have waited for Sakura to come through that door.
Umemiya let go of Sakura’s leg, and he lost his balance, falling onto the ground.
“Okay, I think that’s enough of a show. Hiragi, why don’t you take the others back to class so Sakura and I can talk,” he ordered the other third year.
Hiragi didn’t wait for a ‘but’ from any of the first years before forcing them to the door with barked orders. He didn’t even have to tell Kaji to get his ass to class either. Kaji looked more than ready to leave the roof.
When they were gone, Umemiya looked back down at Sakura and held out his hand. He gave a small smile that told Sakura it would be okay.
Warily, he took the offered hand.
“Why don’t we take a seat and just talk. Things escalated a little too quickly between us,” Umemiya said as he sat down.
Sakura sat down across from the other. The buzzing had finally begun to fade thanks to the brief fight, though his chest was still tight.
“We already talked,” he grumbled.
“We did, but we didn’t really listen to each other, did we?” This was the Umemiya Sakura was familiar with. Cool-headed but not cold.
“I guess I should start by apologizing. I didn’t give you much room to explain before interrogating you. That wasn’t fair of me,” Umemiya said. He looked down at the table with guilt. “I should have known better as your big brother. I’m sorry.”
“Damn it! Just apologize before they sue us!”
He saw Umemiya place his hands on his knees and bow. He had never had anyone apologize to him before. It was weird, and he didn’t know how to respond, so he remained quiet.
When Umemiya raised his head, he looked more serious, almost determined.
“Now let’s talk, and I promise to listen,” Umemiya spoke with sincerity. “Before, I was focused on protecting Kotoha and thinking about how she might have felt hearing these rumors. I forgot to think about how they may be affecting you, too.”
How was he feeling? He didn’t know. Everything had been loud. Constantly buzzing and hard to breathe. This was the first moment he felt like things were slightly quiet. Like he could finally take a breath without falling.
“What does it matter? They’re just rumors,” he leaned to rest his arms on his knees. He didn’t want to look at Umemiya’s prying stare.
“They may not be true, but it can still hurt when people have a wrong view of you,” Umemiya started to say, “I know that even if Kotoha wouldn’t judge others, she would feel upset if others judged her based on baseless rumors. And I think it hurt when you thought I was accusing you of hurting her. Is that right?”
Sakura’s fists clenched. He didn’t know how to respond. No one ever asked him how he felt about the gossip that encompassed him. How was he even supposed to feel about it? He knew he just wanted Umemiya to know the truth.
“I didn’t do anything. I’m not apologizing to those assholes or that lying bitch!”
“We had a fight cause I wanted somethin’ different than omurice.” Why was he talking? “We made up, but Granny Sato came in and saw me holding her hand from when I stopped her from leavin’. I just wanted her to hear me out. That's it. I have no idea how it got so…” he trailed off.
“That’s enou-” the buzzing was becoming audible.
Umemiya only sighed, “Rumors and gossip have a habit of spiraling and becoming completely different from the original. I doubt Granny Sato would say something false. People probably kept adding to the story until it was completely different.”
The explanation made sense, Sakura guessed.
“That still doesn’t tell me how you feel. You were at the center of this, too,” Umemiya kept pushing.
Sakura curled more into himself as he responded, “I don’t know. Kinda mad no one told me what people were sayin’ behind my back. You were the first to tell me what was goin’ on.”
He snuck a look up at Umemiya. The other was just sitting patiently for Sakura to say more.
“Ugh, I guess also kinda disappointed people here could believe I’d hurt Kotoha or do anything to her,” he said as he covered his face. He didn’t want to look at Umemiya or for the other to see his face. He wasn’t embarrassed, but there was just something so vulnerable about this talk.
“From what I heard, the rumors weren’t about you hurting Kotoha. Sakura, I don’t think anyone believes you’d hurt anyone in this town.”
His head shot up and looked at a slightly amused Umemiya, who continued to speak, “Though they do think you are a player or that you and Kotoha are going to run off and get married.”
There was the embarrassment. He could feel his face heat up as he hid his face back in his hands.
“Don’t worry,” he heard Umemiya say as he stood and went to sit next to him, “now that we know what happened, we can try and set people straight and let them know it’s not true.”
He finally looked at Umemiya's smiling face. His cheeks were probably still red, but he didn’t care.
“It doesn’t matter. People will believe what they want. They don’t change their minds,” he said.
Umemiya released a long hum in thought, “That is true, but originally I thought the rumors might have been at least a little true.”
Sakura raised an eyebrow, “Ya thought I was a player?”
Umemiya laughed, “No, I thought you and Kotoha were going to run off, and I’d have to drag you both back before the wedding. But see? If I could change my mind, then it’s not impossible.”
Sakura looked back down at the table and contemplated Umemiya’s words. He didn’t flinch when he felt the other place their hand on top of his head.
“From the way you reacted, it feels like you haven’t had the best luck with rumors.”
Sakura shook his head but didn’t elaborate further.
“If you ever want to talk about it, I’ll listen.”
The hand on his head was heavy but warm. It made him realize that the buzzing was completely gone and his chest was finally free.
He didn’t feel trapped anymore among the buzzing flies caught in the web.