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Cole loved the finders. He really did. He loved how excited Fritz and Spitz got when a geyser of new lost stuff shot up, or how they’d instantly get in bed whenever Cole promised to tell them a ninja adventure bedtime story. He loved Bonzle’s sarcastic humor, and those rare moments where she’d genuinely confide in Cole on how she was feeling. He loved Geo. He loved his creativity, his kindness, his willingness to help Cole out whenever he had to leave on missions, he loved everything about him, and he wouldn’t trade his life with the finders for anything in the world.
That being said, he still missed the ninja. He’d gotten used to not seeing them after the merge, but that was when he didn’t know where any of them were. Now that most of them had been found (still looking for Jay) he missed them even more. While he’d visit the monastery from time to time, they hadn’t figured out an efficient way to travel back and forth yet, and the other ninja were busy training the newbies and didn’t have much time to visit him. He had the finders to keep him company, which was enough for him, but he sometimes felt more isolated than the rest of the ninja, like we wasn’t a part of the team anymore.
One thing he missed most of all was his late night conversations with Kai. Sure, he had Geo, who he did enjoy late night conversations with, but Kai was able to understand Cole’s struggles, having gone through similar stuff. Geo wasn’t a ninja, and had no intention of becoming one. While Cole was fine with that, he sometimes wished Geo was so he’d be able to once again talk about being a ninja late into the night.
While Cole wouldn’t acknowledge it now, being able to confide in someone who understood what he was going through wasn’t the only reason he enjoyed his late night talks with Kai. He noticed how Kai’s whole demeanor would change as soon as he entered his room. Cole noticed how Kai’s stares would linger a little longer than with anyone else. Cole noticed how Kai took any opportunity to hold his hand, or hug him, or initiate any form of physical contact. He noticed all these signs, but never allowed himself to think anything more of it. Kai likes girls, and he had Skylor. Cole liked girls. He didn’t want to date another boy. That was what he told himself. And even though he now knew one of those was false, it didn’t change anything. Besides, it would’ve been unprofessional to date another member of the team. Sure, Jay and Nya were a thing, it that started before she became a ninja, and it would’ve looked weird if 2/3rds of the ninja team were in relationships with each other. Also, Cole liked to keep his professional and personal lives separate. He didn’t wanna risk making things on the team awkward by confessing that he felt something a little more than platonic for Kai, especially since he was certain Kai would reject him. While Cole was okay with that fact now since he had Geo, he always wondered what his life would be like had he gotten those feelings off his chest, how his relationship with Kai would’ve changed. Again, he was certain Kai had no romantic interest in Cole, and if he ever did, those feelings were long gone.
So imagine Cole’s surprise when Kai called him out of the blue? He answered, Kai asked how he’d been, they talked, and Cole ended the call after thinking Kai would hit the button, which lead to an awkward silence. After the call Cole went to bed as normal.
So why was he still thinking about it?
He had no reason to be excited over there being a chance that Kai liked him like that. He didn’t need a reminder of what never was. He didn’t want it.
He loved the finders. He loved Geo. He loved his family, and he didn’t want to lose them. He didn’t want to hurt Geo by deciding to chase his long dead teenage delusions. It was too late. Curiosity killed the cat, and Cole wasn’t willing to risk losing his family over a half baked analysis on his friend’s actions.
Cole didn’t act when the moment was right, and what he gets for that is an eternal sense of wonder, of if he’d chased Kai, where would he have ended up. He knew in his heart that they were soulmates in another lifetime, just not this one. And honestly, as long as he knew Kai was happy, that was enough.