Chapter Text
"Until you're just another girl on the subway..."
It’s been… What, three years already? Three years since you realized everyone. The house felt so empty without the warmth of knowing you always have company to talk to when you're lonely. Without them, honestly. All of them, even Rebel. You missed everyone so much. So damn much.
You contemplated moving away. Leaving it all behind. Until you remembered that every bed would be Betty, every clock would be Timothy. You couldn't leave this behind. Every shadow reminds you of Skips, every empty space reminds you of what you once had. You catch yourself wondering if they even cared, or if they were just using you to become real. Using you to escape into having an actual life.
You open your phone, clicking on Thiscord and typing a message to the group chat with everyone of the past in it. 'Hey! How's everyone doing??' You hope they answer. Deep down, you know nobody will. It breaks your heart to know that they're enjoying life while yours falls apart without them. Getting to feel the warmth of a friend’s arms while you’re left alone in this house.
With a sigh, you grab your keys and decide to visit Dirk at his tattoo removal place. You play some music on the ride, not realizing how tears pool in your eyes and spill down your cheeks. You grip the steering wheel, biting your lip. You pull in the parking lot, wiping your eyes and plastering a small smile on your face in a futile attempt to hide your embarrassingly pitiful expression.
As you walk into the small shop, Dirk looks up at you and smiles faintly. "Hey." He greets. You smile weakly. "Hi.." you say, voice wavering and somehow managing to crack in only one word. "You okay..?" Dirk hesitantly asks. "Did I mean anything to you?" You blurt before even thinking. "I mean.." He chuckles awkwardly. "You were an amazing escape from Harper.”
Your heart drops. You were just an escape to him. A pastime while the toxic dynamic between the two settled again. "I was just an escape?" You whisper, voice cracking with the weight of your emotions. Before he can defend his words, you turn around and walk out.
As you turn your car back on, you can't stop your tears. You sob in your car for a while, unable to believe the short altercation was the full truth. After you collect yourself, you begin to drive to Fantina's house. Surely she still loves you... right? She was your biggest fan, after all. As you arrive, you shakily wipe your tears away, not even bothering to smile anymore.
As you knock, you hear the ruffling of fabric. You wonder what that’s coming from, thoughts racing to the worst possibilities. Fantina opens the door looking frazzled, face flushed and clothes messily strung on. Her shirt is unbuttoned slightly. Behind her on the couch is.. a guy. With a blanket over his lap. Your head spins. You were right, even she’s moved on.
"Hi Fantina." You say flatly, already knowing what she's gonna say. "Hi! Uhm, you caught me at a bad time, sorry!" She rambles, blushing. "So. Was I just a phase to you?" You ask bluntly, hands shaking as they clench into fists and relax again repetitively. "I’m sorry..? Uh.. I've moved on.. and I’m kinda busy, so could you leave..? Sorry!" Your eyes begin to water again. You leave, getting back in your car and driving back home.
As you drag yourself through the door, body heavy with confusion and sadness, you go to your fridge and fling it open. You usually don't drink, but it feels necessary right now. You need something to calm your mind.